Irritating BS your SO does

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

Is he OCD? I get that way with my SO sometimes. Especially when I'm mad that the house is a mess and he hasn't done anything the whole time I've been at work.

Not officially, but he has some tendencies that way. Everything has to be just so in the workshop (his space). Inside my house is another matter. I am looking at a discarded paper towel left on my couch from lunch with bits of pot pie on it.

[ValerieA 350]

Not officially, but he has some tendencies that way. Everything has to be just so in the workshop (his space). Inside my house is another matter. I am looking at a discarded paper towel left on my couch from lunch with bits of pot pie on it.

Take him out and shoot him in the face.

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

Take him out and shoot him in the face.

I'll have to borrow one of Alan's Lee Enfields for such purposes as I do not keep firearms in the house. Then I'll be set. In the meantime I will just shoot ice daggers through the french doors at the workshop and tell him I won't be making an early supper.

God, I'm all bluster and no execution. Co-dependency has a new name, and that is "Maven."

[ValerieA 350]

You are home, so why is he still there? No house- or cat-sitting needed. Boot him out to get his own damned supper.

Oh, and get a bow & arrows. I think that might actually be more satisfying than a gun and bullets.

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

He is still here because his stuff is still here, and his office is here. He's doing a voiceover this afternoon and his studio is in the workshop.

A year on from The Incident With She Who Must Not Be Named (after which I kicked him out) and the house is still filled with his stuff. I'm looking to move soon though and his stuff is NOT coming with me!

[Captain Oates 910]

Is he OCD? I get that way with my SO sometimes. Especially when I'm mad that the house is a mess and he hasn't done anything the whole time I've been at work.

Working with birds is excruciating ! There is no communication methods that will suffice.

My dad was coming back with my mum from Morecambe on their pedal cycles - 60 miles each way.

The main road went round a sharp bend to the right but a cart track went off to left which was 'straight on' I suppose. She was in front and shouted "Which way". He shouted "straight on". She went off up the cart track and got stuck in the cow muck while he flew gracefully round the right hand bend in the main road.

BUT

The killer was that as he went round, he LAUGHED

She was stuck up a cart track in the poo and he LAUGHED

This happened when they were 19 and she still went red with rage when it was mentioned - even when they were 81. They actually had a stick fight in their wheel chairs in hospital when they were 81 and it was as sore with her as when she was 19.

Communications simply cannot work as the wiring is totally different.

45% of women do not know their left from right for a start so any collaborative effort involving map reading (such as sailing close to Iranian waters) is bound to end in domestic violence.

The driving examiner in Wisconsin said she had never seen anyone parallel park like me and it was wonderful. The fact that I was a bloke and I had experience of parking in Paris accounted for that.

I would be distraught if anyone detected even a slight hint of sexism in this - it's just a wiring description of a telly which is different to a vacuum

Now to mollify members of the 'gentle' sex, I usually and immediately acknowledge that women are better than men at lots of things - but it doesn't seem to work. They want to believe they are either equal or better but never worse. Men by contrast, admit that they are worse at some things - diapers, cat litter, washing up, being frightened of insects, remembering mother in law's birthday etc.

Edited June 29, 2010 by saywhat

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

Working with birds is excruciating ! There is no communication methods that will suffice.

My dad was coming back with my mum from Morecambe on their pedal cycles - 60 miles each way.

The main road went round a sharp bend to the right but a cart track went off to left which was 'straight on' I suppose. She was in front and shouted "Which way". He shouted "straight on". She went off up the cart track and got stuck in the cow muck while he flew gracefully round the right hand bend in the main road.

BUT

The killer was that as he went round, he LAUGHED

She was stuck up a cart track in the poo and he LAUGHED

This happened when they were 19 and she still went red with rage when it was mentioned - even when they were 81. They actually had a stick fight in their wheel chairs in hospital when they were 81 and it was as sore with her as when she was 19.

Communications simply cannot work as the wiring is totally different.

45% of women do not know their left from right for a start so any collaborative effort involving map reading (such as sailing close to Iranian waters) is bound to end in domestic violence.

The driving examiner in Wisconsin said she had never seen anyone parallel park like me and it was wonderful. The fact that I was a bloke and I had experience of parking in Paris accounted for that.

I would be distraught if anyone detected even a slight hint of sexism in this - it's just a wiring description of a telly which is different to a vacuum

Now to mollify members of the 'gentle' sex, I usually and immediately acknowledge that women are better than men at lots of things - but it doesn't seem to work. They want to believe they are either equal or better but never worse. Men by contrast, admit that they are worse at some things - diapers, cat litter, washing up, being frightened of insects, remembering mother in law's birthday etc.

Hmmm. I know I must accept what you say given your status as Caliph, but it grates. A little. I will admit I am worse than he is at fixing cars. That's just about it. Oh, and reaching stuff on high shelves.

I do like your story of your parents though.

[Captain Oates 910]

Hmmm. I know I must accept what you say given your status as Caliph, but it grates. A little. I will admit I am worse than he is at fixing cars. That's just about it. Oh, and reaching stuff on high shelves.

I do like your story of your parents though.

She tormented him for 60 years+

She would wait until he was engrossed watching an important football match then she would say: "I never noticed the shape of your nose before"

He would say "shut up"

She would say "You didnt say shut up when you came to talk to me in 1931 at that cricket match - oh no you were making out how nice you were. If you had told me to shut up then I wouldn't have had anything to do with you "

She would keep this up until he was bouncing up and down shouting at her and calling her insane while she just drank sherry and laughed.

They fought like cat and dog for 60 years. Takes all kinds I suppose. When she went to hospital for a week or two, he said "Oh it's lovely to have a break from her"

3 days later he was sat with his head in his hands saying he wanted her to come home and he missed her so much.

The long winter nights must have just flown by

I remember being under a car and I sent my GF of the time for a spare. She went into a garage spares dept and said " My BF has sent me here for a screw"

They said, "Yeah come on round the counter love" and they started laughing

She came back with the screw but she was really angry and it was all my fault

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

I remember being under a car and I sent my GF of the time for a spare. She went into a garage spares dept and said " My BF has sent me here for a screw"

They said, "Yeah come on round the counter love" and they started laughing

She came back with the screw but she was really angry and it was all my fault

I really wonder why that might have been the case. I'm absolutely flummoxed.

[TBoneTX 44,786]

Take him out and shoot him in the face.

The increasingly pregnant Mrs. T-B., while being tucked into bed tonight, said (50% matter-of-factly, 50% cheerily), "I have hate in my heart. Sorry that I want to beat you up. I want lemonade." Si, man.

[ValerieA 350]

The increasingly pregnant Mrs. T-B., while being tucked into bed tonight, said (50% matter-of-factly, 50% cheerily), "I have hate in my heart. Sorry that I want to beat you up. I want lemonade." Si, man.

I'd hide all the potential weapons in the house. Including the steak knives, they can do a lot of damage.

[twowls 217]

The increasingly pregnant Mrs. T-B., while being tucked into bed tonight, said (50% matter-of-factly, 50% cheerily), "I have hate in my heart. Sorry that I want to beat you up. I want lemonade." Si, man.

I'm cross-stitching that onto a sampler. It's like Jimmy Carter crossed with Attila the Hun on an estrogen drip.

[TBoneTX 44,786]

I'd hide all the potential weapons in the house. Including the steak knives, they can do a lot of damage.

Too late, si man; she needs them for edible objects. A few weeks ago, you would NOT have wanted to have been the grapefruit on which she was taking out her heart-hate, no man. I should probably arrive home tonight with lemonade, assuming that it's still on The List, si man.

[Captain Oates 910]

A: What's wrong ?

If you don't know, I'm not telling you.

B: What kind of car are you going to buy ?

Definitely a red one

C: Oh jeez it's been sick on me

oh diddums, he is so cute when he does that

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

A: What's wrong ?

If you don't know, I'm not telling you.

B: What kind of car are you going to buy ?

Definitely a red one

C: Oh jeez it's been sick on me

oh diddums, he is so cute when he does that

I see you've been studying the male/female playbook then, Alan.