Irritating BS your SO does

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

Oh. Manbag? Oh dear. No worries, I will confiscate it for carrying my empties. *hic*

Edited May 28, 2010 by elmcitymaven

[Empress of Groovy 373]

Alan has a manbag?

Is that the clinical term? (*snork*)

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

Why, yes it is. They are perfectly sized for carrying around empties.

[Empress of Groovy 373]

Why, yes it is. They are perfectly sized for carrying around empties.

Guys really do have it all.

[Captain Oates 911]

My publicist has asked me to clarify the manbag thing...

Its only coz I am too mean to put my passport /greencard/UK credit cards/Euros etc in the hotel safe and I only use it on my UK trips. This is coz that safe money is best applied to the GIN fund.

In most cases I risk it in the boot of the car when I make my social visits. I have left it hanging on the back of the bar chair from fort Lauderdale to tenerife to Berlin to Odessa to Auckland - so its safer in the car boot.

I do cross my legs in the European fashion and not the figure 'A' preferred by American men. Its coz we Europeans are confident of our orienteering whereas American men are scared to death of being thought Nancy boys. It's a cowboy thing.

The 1851 census shows one of my ancestors sharing a room with a 'cowboy' near Hereford.

In further mitigation, I should mention that I do walk like John Wayne (did).

An artist once stopped me in a pub and said I was the reincarnation of John Wayne and as an artist he could see the aura. Don't know if he was after capturing my aura or what.

Last F&C today - checked in to leave this country where the minister in charge of cutting workers pay can claim £40,000 in rent money when he was sleeping with his gay lover who owned the house at that address - and still keep his job ! Soft touch the UK public - he would be assassinated as he was going up his back passage in the US

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

Alan, I am pleased to see you taking good care of the gin fund. Its preservation and continued growth is crucial to the happiness of your womenfolk.

Have a great last fish and chips, and bring your good self back safely to us frontier women.

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

Oi Alan! I see you lurking. What tales of Blighty?

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

*crickets*

In the absence of any conversation, I bring you this supremely bizarre cake spotted tonight at Ralphs in the bakery section:

Yes, that's a hamburger cake. A gigantic, nasty hamburger cake.

[The_Dude 1,142]

I've seen that for real. A 3 pound piece of ground sirloin with devils food cake for bun. It was grotesquely alluring. I almost plopped down the $28 for it. Only in South Carolina I guess. But what else would you expect from a supermarket chain called Piggly Wiggly?

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

I've seen that for real. A 3 pound piece of ground sirloin with devils food cake for bun. It was grotesquely alluring. I almost plopped down the $28 for it. Only in South Carolina I guess. But what else would you expect from a supermarket chain called Piggly Wiggly?

I felt the same pull as well -- I just stared and stared at the hamburger cake. I was utterly transfixed. Who buys this cr@p?

The week Avatar was released on DVD Ralphs had an orgy of blue cakes, cupcakes and cookies. Since when is a DVD release as worthy of themed bakery goods as a major holiday, like, say, Arbor Day?

[Welshcookie 17]

*crickets*

In the absence of any conversation, I bring you this supremely bizarre cake spotted tonight at Ralphs in the bakery section:

Yes, that's a hamburger cake. A gigantic, nasty hamburger cake.

Wow....I wanted to say something witty but there are no words forthcoming

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

Face it welshie, you want one.

[Welshcookie 17]

I kinda do and that is worrying

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

The only cure for such hamburger cake fetishes is, I fear, years of daily deep psychoanalysis. Are you sure you want to look that deep into your soul?

[Captain Oates 911]

Report from the front:

Seattle security - When the plane landed we were told we would not be allowed off the plane until an immigration official had checked our passports and customs forms at the plane door !

Then when we claimed our bags, we were allowed out into the concourse in batches - so that nobody could sneak in the exit door..

Immigration officer was a real doll. Latina, late 40's with eyes like cadbury's chocolate - quiet, feminine neat .....couldn't understand her accent much - she was asking if I had USC children - I said no and she seemed baffled as to how I had a green card. I had a mental block about telling her I was married until I had to - must be habit from 18 years single in between. Slowly walked away after getting the stamp.

Mixed feelings about the UK. Morrison's food is totally wonderful compared to anything in the US. The greenery and May blossom and animals were stunning and that damp fragrance of spring (or the hotel shampoo).

The yobs were everywhere looking aggressive and dirty and drunk and drugged and ignorant. UK has the best yobs in the whole world bar non. We used them to build an Empire. Just give em a Lee Enfield and tell em to shoot anyone who doesn't speak English. Those gangs in SC LA would run back to Mexico if they met em.

Three weeks ago I bunged my son and daughter a GBP grand each for school uniforms for kids and essentials and an emergency fund if the volcanic ash killed his business

She spent it on a cheap carpet and a junk settee and threw the classy one I gave her - and he bought a necklace for my first wife and massive cocktails for really badger rough tattoed birds in the bars ! I dont like my ex and she doesnt like me !

That was my £2k !!! GONE.

I could have bought 3 more rifles with that and GIN - lots of GIN - and lime

Lesson learned - her bloody kids can go to school in rags and he can starve on the beach in Tenerife - done my bit and then some over the years but I might as well wee it up against a wall as them. grump grump grump and 10 times grump

ok now 3 days of jet lag after which I will be back in the saddle