Irritating BS your SO does

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

I don't think Los Americanos are word players like the Brits (well the English anyway)

I do hope you will make a few exceptions for us pleb colonials, Alan.

[Captain Oates 911]

I do hope you will make a few exceptions for us pleb colonials, Alan.

Well I have been studying your people VERY closely as you would expect for 3 years now and less intensely for 20 years before that.

I have concluded that the yankee gringos have a very extreme range. The finest and the worst are here. The dumbest and the brightest. The greediest and the most philanthropic. Every extreme of human nature and behaviour is magnified times 10 in the USA. The politician's sex scandles are superb. Even the weather is extreme - I go from minus 40 in Wisconsin to plus 117 here. It's exhausting just watching it without having to work and be part of it.

I have it all figured now and I have found my feet - for every god nut quivering with the spirit on my doorstep and speaking in tongues, there is a sensible person with balance who is open minded. For every car full of kids with hoods and machine guns, there is a very generous helpful neighbour (oops neighbor)

I am in a very Republican area and my buddies want to lynch everyone from outside (except me coz I am white)- but apart from their politics they are great and they are my buddies. Took some getting used to but it's all right now - in fact its a gas..

So now when I have a bad experience, I don't blame it on them thar pesky yanks and tar em all with the same brush and want to go home - coz I know it's just one person and I will have a totally different experience tomorrow.

Getting back to the thread - I suppose our spouses are like foreign countries (NOT saying they are a big expanse !) - but you know what I mean - it takes time and then eventually you don't notice their little idiotsyncracies and the living is a lot easier

Edited May 20, 2010 by saywhat

[Captain Oates 911]

I understand the lingo most times

YOU HAVE TO SEE THIS !

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

(NOT saying they are a big expanse !)

But perhaps a big expense, no?

[Captain Oates 911]

But perhaps a big expense, no?

Often , yes

When I lost my job in 1995, I was going out with a hairdresser and she was throwing back expensive cocktails at every opportunity. I explained that I had been living on my savings for 8 months and could we have a beer instead - she said:

'If you can't afford a girlfriend, you shouldn't have one'

Then she ditched me for a guy who had a nice job and a nice company car.

2 months later I got a job as business planner for a hotel group and her new boyfriend got fired ! (No I wasn't his new boss)

A side of effect of intelligent ones is that they often earn a lot more too and can afford their own booze and air tickets - I forgot that advantage. My son manages to get birds that buy his beer ! I haven't graduated to that level of gigoloism yet and I could always afford my own - I wonder what it's like ? I will never know.

I hope these young fellah-me-lads are reading and internalising these tales of woe - if I knew then what I know now eh ? Blond hairdressers in sports cars - aaaaggghhh ! Scars on wrists - aaaaaaaargh ! 5 kids all different dads ? - aaarrgghhhh 5 great danes who lick her ice cream with her in turns? jeez

Aren't we VJers lucky

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

5 great danes who lick her ice cream with her in turns? jeez

Of all your examples, this is perhaps the most disturbing.

I learned from my first marriage that a woman should not depend on a man for her keep. Going from a rah-rah-pass-the-champers-Bunty lifestyle with my ex to being on my own financially was a big wake-up call. I can take care of myself now and wish I'd not spent so many years taking exactly the sort of low-pay/high-ish cachet jobs I could afford to take with my ex minting it in the City (synthetic derivatives were and still are his bread and butter -- I've told him it's his fecking fault the world is in this mess now!) -- PA for a TV company (we brought you Changing Rooms, Big Brother and Can't Cook Won't Cook -- please send hate mail to them, not me), manager of a secondhand bookshop in South Ken. Somewhere along the way I realised my heart wasn't in the not making money business and went back to law school to start learning how to be a happy capitalist pig. It suits me MUCH better. By the time El Posho told me it was over, I had a couple of years of City experience under my belt, but I was unable to keep myself in the manner to which I had become accustomed. Had I just started with the moneymaking earlier, I would have been in better stead.

All of which is a roundabout way of saying ladies, take care of yourselves.

[Captain Oates 911]

Of all your examples, this is perhaps the most disturbing.

I learned from my first marriage that a woman should not depend on a man for her keep. Going from a rah-rah-pass-the-champers-Bunty lifestyle with my ex to being on my own financially was a big wake-up call. I can take care of myself now and wish I'd not spent so many years taking exactly the sort of low-pay/high-ish cachet jobs I could afford to take with my ex minting it in the City (synthetic derivatives were and still are his bread and butter -- I've told him it's his fecking fault the world is in this mess now!) -- PA for a TV company (we brought you Changing Rooms, Big Brother and Can't Cook Won't Cook -- please send hate mail to them, not me), manager of a secondhand bookshop in South Ken. Somewhere along the way I realised my heart wasn't in the not making money business and went back to law school to start learning how to be a happy capitalist pig. It suits me MUCH better. By the time El Posho told me it was over, I had a couple of years of City experience under my belt, but I was unable to keep myself in the manner to which I had become accustomed. Had I just started with the moneymaking earlier, I would have been in better stead.

All of which is a roundabout way of saying ladies, take care of yourselves.

Absolutely ! that's a brill tale well done... The worst trap is getting into something you can only do when you are young - my son's pal is a deep sea diver in abu dabi and he is 42 and his nut is all over the place from high pressure gases in his brain etc. What's he going to do now ? Yes the ladies who rely on men are on a sticky wicket as their odometer clicks up. I was single 18 years in between and I could jam the VJ web site with my tales of ladies I met who had who relied on men 100% for mansions, horses etc. They then joined an introduction agency and paid £600 (back then !) on their credit cards to try and hook a new mug. One of them had been a flashy blond receptionist at an exclusive Manchester night club when she met her hubby. They married and were together 18 years - then he dumped her and went back to the SAME club and got the new receptionist 20 years younger ! Turns out his farm and horses and cars etc etc were all 100% mortgaged - there were no assets. I heard a story like that every week while I was doing those dates. One woman had adopted 5 children and then hubby cleared off and left her to it.

They were all in big financial trouble but paying $2k equiv to try and find a white knight.

The 7 P's are so important http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/7_Ps_(military_adage)

Checking into the Seattle amsterdam Leeds flight in only 5 hours ! yippee !!! f&c and yorkshire pud to excess

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

Have some Yorkshire pudding for me, Alan. And come back with some more tales of your misspent youth and middle age.

Sigh. Alan is TOTALLY my not-so-secret VJ crush.

[Captain Oates 911]

Have some Yorkshire pudding for me, Alan. And come back with some more tales of your misspent youth and middle age.

Sigh. Alan is TOTALLY my not-so-secret VJ crush.

can't believe you said that - most people find me extremely tedious and annoying and full of it !

There is hope for us all...

Actually that is so on topic ! My conclusion is that we get use to other half's little peculiarities so we hardly notice em - that plus Stockholm syndrome allows us to carry on

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stockholm_syndrome

Of course when the FBI ATF CIA and secret service raid our homes and arrest our spouses for what we have come to regard as normal, re-evaluation is needed.

[JulianMelissa 52]

Get a room you two!

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

Get a room you two!

No need to be jealous, Julian. Alan may be my super-secret VJ crush, but you, with your Child & Co account and Porsches, will always be my own true heart. Despite my profit-making ability and feminist credentials, I am willing to chuck it all in. Best to wait until after you and Melissa's AOS application is approved though.

[Captain Oates 911]

Get a room you two!

yeah with a jakooosi and fish and chips with mushy peas and curry sauce and black pudding and ....

actually, the last time i suggested covering someone with jelly and custard and licking it off - they told me not to trifle with their affections.

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

[*julez* 124]

You are hilarious, Alan!

[bakofoil 27]

yeah with a jakooosi and fish and chips with mushy peas and curry sauce and black pudding and ....

Timmy Taylor's, fish and chips and curry sauce! Alan, you really make me miss home but I'm at a loss to understand why you're unable to enjoy a decent Yorkshire Pudding in the US. Perhaps you should come over to my house for Sunday dinner and we'll invite Maven.