have to complain

[justashooter 430]

I don't think the teacher should get involved either way. It's not her responsibility to enforce wearing the hijab and it's not her responsibility to take it off of the girl either. Since this is clearly NOT due to religion (because Islam does not require hijab at that young age) I don't see where this lady is at fault. I agree with the other poster who said extremist dad should put his daughter in Islamic school.

it is not the responsibility of a public school teacher to enforce the religious convictions of a student's parent. doesn't matter whether it's fish on fridays, face coverings, or prayer. a school is a secular institution, and not required (or even allowed) to enforce religious teaching.

[Meriem_DZ 37]

Personally, I think the OP is in the wrong for sticking her nose in other people's business. Nobody likes a busybody.

I dont think she is trying to be a busybody, or stick her nose in anything. She seems to me to be a caring and empathetic person that is trying to help educate the teacher, (even thought it fell on deaf ears) the importance and the reasoning for the Dad requiring the child to wear hijab. The man wants his child to wear hijab, period. The child needs to wear hijab. The teacher should not have to enforce the dad's wishes nor should she encourage the child not to wear it. The child knows the consequences of not wearing it. I am sure the OP was also thinking about the child. I would worry that the child would be punished if caught not wearing the hijab. I know I would have been concerned just like the op. It's a good thing we have caring people in the world like the OP.

Meriem

Edited May 4, 2010 by Meriem_DZ

[ErikaAndHamit 73]

I think the child is definitely NOT confused and doesn't want to wear it and should not be forced by the school, her father, or the teacher to wear it nor should the school or teacher be forced to force the child to wear it either. Once she gets home it is a family matter, but in the end the girl will do what she wants to do and thank God as this is America where she actually will have a choice. That is one of the good things about living here. I understand religious belief and all that, but religion should also be a personal choice and not all Muslims wear hijab and that does not make any one better than the other for that matter.

[treehugger 23]

I think the child is definitely NOT confused and doesn't want to wear it and should not be forced by the school, her father, or the teacher to wear it nor should the school or teacher be forced to force the child to wear it either. Once she gets home it is a family matter, but in the end the girl will do what she wants to do and thank God as this is America where she actually will have a choice. That is one of the good things about living here. I understand religious belief and all that, but religion should also be a personal choice and not all Muslims wear hijab and that does not make any one better than the other for that matter.

Since when do six year olds know and understand the implications of everything they do? This is why parents despair, it's not up to the school to encourage a six year old to disobey her father (unless of course it's a different matter entirely). They should encourage her to speak to her father about the fact she doesn't want to wear the scarf, not give her the mixed signals that it's ok for her to do what she wants behind her parents' backs. That teaches all sorts of wrong ideas.

We shouldn't let our personal opinions regarding the scarf cloud the fact (as told by the OP) that a particular teacher is encouraging a six year old to disobey her parents.

[Minya's wife 25]

Bravo Aya.

and Stashi too...This is the best advice. If it's not your problem...it's not your problem.

We need to start paying teachers better money. There is a whole lotta crapola daily they are subjected too....its sad that we think so minimial of their role in our childrens lives. And if we pay poorly as a country as a whole...you get what you pay for in my opinion.

Following your OT tangent...I don't know about other places, but starting salary (Certification, BA degree, 0-1 yr experience) for a teacher in HISD is $44,987 for 10 months of work! That's an almost 54K salary for someone who works 12 months. Maybe I'm way off here, but I don't know too many entry level salaries that are that high. I don't think teachers aren't paid adequately. I think that what is expected of them is quite often unclear and they're pulled in entirely too many directions...none of this benefits the children which is why they're there in the first place. IMO teachers should be allowed to teach...which may include something that the parents may not necessarily agree with. But in today's education climate, the teacher gets questioned and opposed at every turn, by the child, the parent, the school and the district....and in the process every child is 'left behind'.

[venusfire503 54]

I dont think she is trying to be a busybody, or stick her nose in anything. She seems to me to be a caring and empathetic person that is trying to help educate the teacher, (even thought it fell on deaf ears) the importance and the reasoning for the Dad requiring the child to wear hijab. The man wants his child to wear hijab, period. The child needs to wear hijab. The teacher should not have to enforce the dad's wishes nor should she encourage the child not to wear it. The child knows the consequences of not wearing it. I am sure the OP was also thinking about the child. I would worry that the child would be punished if caught not wearing the hijab. I know I would have been concerned just like the op. It's a good thing we have caring people in the world like the OP.

Meriem

Thank you, Meriem. I was going to check on this sooner, but there were some pressing family issues...

Anyway, I do want to mention that I wasn't sticking my nose in. It's kind of funny, actually - no one here really knows me, but I'm actually a person who doesn't notice things (head in the clouds, to put it nicely ). What happened was that I was sent to that classroom to help out, and the teacher started telling me the story out of the blue. I never would have known the girl was supposed to have a headscarf on, because I didn't see it. I just told her what I knew about the religious implications, but left out how I don't think a teacher should tell her student to disobey her parent, because I couldn't think of a nice way to say it. And despite what anyone here thinks, that's exactly what she was doing - she told me that she purposely hid the child behind her back. And that she told the girl she could remove it, knowing full well that the father would not approve.

I agree with those who mention how difficult it is to be a teacher. I think it's even harder to be a sub, because you don't even have a chance to get to know all the students' names or anything in one day. Trust me, I have endless sympathy for teachers!

I personally don't 'get' why someone would make a 6 year old wear a headscarf, but that's the part that really IS none of my business. I know there's a full spectrum on this issue - from people who don't cover even their hair, to those I've seen who cover everything - even wear gloves to cover their hands. My daughter knows a girl who recently started covering her hair because she started her 'period', and that's when I thought most people started doing it, but at some schools I've noticed very young girls (even 5) with hijab. I don't have the right to tell anyone how to practice their religion, but I do have my own opinions - I just tend to keep them to myself.

Either way, if I found myself in the position of that teacher, I would tell the student it's not my place to tell her if she should have it off or on, but I would remind her that her father wanted her to wear it and that she needs to discuss it with her father. If the father came to the school to talk to me about it, I'd let him know that I cannot force the girl to wear it, and do not want to get involved. I would also have a meeting with the principal to let her know about it. That's why I told the principal - if I was in charge somewhere, I'd want to know what was going on.

And yes, I was concerned about the child. Not only could she get in trouble, but it would be confusing to her to hear different things from 2 adults. I was also concerned about the school - I've subbed there a few times, and generally like the people who work there.

venusfire

[ErikaAndHamit 73]

Good answer! That is a wonderful solution. Too bad you aren't the teacher lol