Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!

[JAPrincess 27]

Morning Yardies

JAEnglish, what about a Photojournalist??

http://education-portal.com/articles/Career_Information_for_a_Degree_in_Photojournalism.html

Love the new signature pic btw!!

[JaEnglishGirl 34]

Morning Yardies

JAEnglish, what about a Photojournalist??

http://education-portal.com/articles/Career_Information_for_a_Degree_in_Photojournalism.html

No sah.....mi nuh wah dat at all.....Plus, I'm already an excellent writer and photographer, could easily free-lance if I decided that was something I was interested in....(yes mi know mi modest BAD!)

[finesse 3]

Important Women's Health Issue:

* Do you have feelings of inadequacy?

* Do you suffer from shyness?

* Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?

* Do you suffer exhaustion from the day to day grind?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about Margaritas.

Margaritas are the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions. Margaritas can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to do just about anything. You will notice the benefits of Margaritas almost immediately and with a regiment of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live

Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past and you will discover many talents you never knew you had. Stop hiding and start living, with Margaritas.

Margaritas may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use Margaritas. However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it.

Side effects may include:

- Dizziness

- Nausea

- Vomiting

- Incarceration

- Erotic lustfulness

- Loss of motor control

- Loss of clothing

- Loss of money

- Loss of virginity

- Table dancing

- Headache

- Dehydration

- Dry mouth

- And a desire to sing Karaoke

WARNINGS:

* The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

* The consumption of Margaritas may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.

* The consumption of Margaritas may cause you to think you can sing.

* The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.

Please share this with other women who may need Margaritas.

[JaEnglishGirl 34]

Aww...ty!!!

My MIL did bex caws just before I had taken some pics of my son and her and he wouldn't kiss her, but was killing me with kisses!

[JAPrincess 27]

No sah.....mi nuh wah dat at all.....Plus, I'm already an excellent writer and photographer, could easily free-lance if I decided that was something I was interested in....(yes mi know mi modest BAD!)

really? I think it would be cool to travel and tell stories through your photography...

yuh boasie eh?? bout excellent writer and photographer

yuh suppose fi let we say dem tings

[sus 70]

Clubwear fail!

[JAPrincess 27]

OMG!

[JAPrincess 27]

Just me and the duppy again...

Mek mi go get some work done

[dillon 6]

Dang Sus I was going to wear that out this weekend!

[finesse 3]

Clubwear fail!

you shouldn't post pics of people when they are not around to defend themselves. where is dada anyway?

[dillon 6]

The old finesse is back in the house!

[sugarapple 1]

you shouldn't post pics of people when they are not around to defend themselves. where is dada anyway?

LOL Dada going to come for you in a min.

Though that outfir is a hot mess.

[sus 70]

you shouldn't post pics of people when they are not around to defend themselves. where is dada anyway?

Finesse v. Dada

DING DING DING

[JaEnglishGirl 34]

really? I think it would be cool to travel and tell stories through your photography...

yuh boasie eh?? bout excellent writer and photographer

yuh suppose fi let we say dem tings

The Return

My earliest memories of her are faint. She smelt lovely, like oranges, nutmeg and mint all mixed up. She used to sing to me before I went to sleep and she would be there making my tea for me in the morning.

That was before she went ‘a foreign’. Then, I went to live with Aunt Pearl. She hates me Aunt Pearl does. I get a beating for coming in too late, for singing too loudly, for eating out the Milo, for walking too slow when she sends me to the shop…..

I wonder what my mother is like.

In Aunt Pearl’s dim front room beside the cabinet full of fragile plates and crystal glasses that we only use when Pastor Blake comes round, there are framed pictures of a light skinned woman, plump but nicely plump.

I don’t think I remember that face.

She has never called but every month the postman comes by on his bicycle and gives Aunt Pearl a blue and white envelope with foreign stamps on it. Aunt Pearl never tells me what’s in those letters, but she goes to market the day after she gets them, so my mother must send money. I know it’s my mother as once Aunt Pearl was in the bathroom and she tells me harshly to go collect the letter,. I turn it over and my mother’s name is on it. I say nothing to Aunt Pearl, as I don’t want a beating that day, she is not in a good mood, I can see by the way she snatches it from me.

I asked her once, after leaving a few weeks what was in it. Her face went dark as a thundercloud and she reaches for the strap.

“Is what a way dis dutty pickney fass doh?”

“Is nat enough seh mi feed yu an clothes yu outa di kindness a mi heart, but yu waa come fass ina mi business too??”

Later that night as I toss and turn, the places where the belt has bitten into my skin, I wipe the tears off my face.

I dream of the day when my mother will come back for me and take me to her foreign land. Whenever the children at school taunt me saying ‘Yu madda run gaan lef yu”, I reply, “Mi madda soon come fi me.” They laugh, but I hold onto the hope, after all what do I have to look forward to if not that.

Maybe she has left me for good I think. Why does she never send me clothes or toys like the mothers of other girls do?

She must know that I only have one pair of shoes, and those are for school. And only one blouse and skirt which I wash every evening when I come in from school and rise early and press before making Aunt Pearl’s breakfast in the mornings.

Maybe what Aunt Pearl says is true. My mother never wanted me, so when she got the chance to go to foreign, she jumped at it. Aunt Pearl says she was going to leave me on the roadside, but she as a Christian took me in.

That’s why I must be grateful for the things Aunt Pearl buys me. I must be happy that I sleep inside even if it is on an old mattress on the floor. I must be happy as I clean and polish the floor every Saturday and wash Aunt Pearl’s clothes. After all, I am almost a woman at twelve.

Aunt Pearl says my mother will never come back for me. She was just happy someone took me off her hands.

I shut my eyes, I have to sleep I need to be up at 6am to press my uniform and make Aunt Pearl’s breakfast before I go to school. I need to leave for school by 7am even though it doesn’t start until 8am, it is a long way and Aunt Pearl says there is no money for me to take the bus, a little walking never killed no-one.

I wake up. My limbs are stiff and sore, I must put some Vaseline on my skin, it makes it better. I hope Aunt Pearl won’t notice that I took some out, I am only allowed a little when I wash my hair.

I push the cloth hanging at my door aside and I unbolt the back door softly, if I wake Aunt Pearl, I will get a beating when I get in from school. I go into the outside shower and begin to bathe. The icy-cold water hits me and I hold my breath to lessen the shock. I lather my rag with my little piece of carbolic soap, Aunt Pearl says it must last me, she has no money to waste on pickney.

I long dreamily about one day when I will get to bathe in the creamy white bath inside with hot water like Aunt Pearl. But if I had a daughter, I would help her draw the water for the bath, not just let her carry the heavy zinc pan like Aunt Pearl makes me do.

I realise with a start that I have spent too long, I need to hurry if I am going to leave on time, Aunt Pearl is having saltfish, fried dumplings and plantain for breakfast. My mouth waters. Maybe if I’m careful, I can take a little bit for myself, I am tired of the cornmeal porridge that I must eat every morning. If Aunt Pearl realises I have taken any, there will be no school for me today.

I finish the breakfast and go to wake Aunt Pearl.

She lies there like a massive cow, snoring heavily. Her large oily face seeming out of place on her frilly pillow.

“Aunt Pearl, yu breakfass ready.” I say.

She snorts and blearily opens an eye.

“Mi a come. Mek sure seh mi tea dep pan di table an it well hat”.

“Yes, Aunt Pearl”, I say.

I go back to the kitchen to get her coffee. As I stir in the milk, I see a car coming down the road. I look curiously, who could be coming to see someone in our village so early?

The car slows and stops at our gate.

I can’t decide whether to go call Aunt Pearl or wait and see what happens.

A woman in a white dress and white slippers gets out. Her face looks familiar…..

My heart thumps in excitement, it is the woman in the picture, MY MOTHER!!

I drop the cup of tea and unlock the door, ignoring Aunt Pearl’s enraged bellow as she hears the mug shatter.

I run out to the gate, which the woman is trying to open.

“Mama?”, I say.

She looks at me, in my torn dirty nightie that was once Aunt Pearl’s and is hanging off my thin body and looks back at my face horrified.

My heart sinks, and I lower my eyes, Aunt Pearl was right, she doesn’t want me, she never did.

I hang my head down.

I feel her arms around me, squeezing my breath out of my body holding me so tight I can hardly breathe. She holds me close, I feel her warm tears of my neck, she is sobbing.

“My baby, oh my baby”, she says.

She rubs my back, and I flinch where she has touched a fresh bruise.

Slowly she holds me away from her and looks at me, her eyes take in my thinness, the shadows under my eyes.She lifts my nightie, I go to push away her hand but she continues, and gasps as she sees the welts and the scars of welts.

I hear a loud gasp, Aunt Pearl is standing at the door, the hated strap drops from her fingers as she stands rooted to the spot.

My mother turns to her with fire in her eyes.

“How could you do dis to mi pickney?”, she screams.

“Mi lef mi one gyaal pickney wid yu and send money every mont fi har an yu have har ya a beat an a starve like dutty dawg??”

Aunt Pearl says, “Myrna, calm dung, mi wi explain.”

My mother is past calming down. “Yu seh yu is a Christian, LOOK PAN MI PICKNEY!!”

She lifts my nightie and I am embarrassed as my underwear are old and discoloured and a crowd of people have begun to gather.

Aunt Pearl begins to sob loudly, and covers her face with her hands.

My mother is shaking with rage. The driver of the car gets out and calls my mother to come away and leave her to God.

Without a backward glance, my mothers pulls me into the car and begins to sob, covering my face with kisses.

Over the next hours, the story unfolds.

She had been given the opportunity to go abroad and being a single mother with no options available, she had had to go, even though she hated the thought of leaving me behind. She used to lie in her bed at night and cry, missing me and wondering if I remembered her. She religiously sent £100 a month to Aunt Pearl who told her how happy I was and how well I was doing in school.

She had planned this trip as a surprise, to see me and to thank her dear friend Aunt Pearl who was doing such a wonderful job of looking after me, while she was making a better life for us in London.

Things will be different she promises, I am coming back to London with her to live, we will never be parted again, no matter what….She holds me close and I inhale her wonderful smell, she smells like oranges, nutmeg and mint all mixed….She sings to me as she used to….I close my eyes, I am in heaven……..

[kjenkins86 5]

Morning all -

We went to these printers called "Multi Function Devices", which copy, print, scan, fax,.... - We all call them "Mother F***er Doesn't work" - People jam them all the time and leave it, don't put in service calls, etc.. - I have gotten to the point where I am linked to just about every printer in the building - if I try to print and it is jammed, I cancel my job and print to a different one!

So, 48 hours from now I will be landing in Jamaica - And all I have packed is some fruit snacks, a boys bathing suit and tshirts and sandals, coloring books, and a frisbee - I think I have a problem, lol

Lol, enjoy your trip mama!

Important Women's Health Issue:

* Do you have feelings of inadequacy?

* Do you suffer from shyness?

* Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?

* Do you suffer exhaustion from the day to day grind?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about Margaritas.

Margaritas are the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions. Margaritas can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to do just about anything. You will notice the benefits of Margaritas almost immediately and with a regiment of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live

Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past and you will discover many talents you never knew you had. Stop hiding and start living, with Margaritas.

Margaritas may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use Margaritas. However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it.

Side effects may include:

- Dizziness

- Nausea

- Vomiting

- Incarceration

- Erotic lustfulness

- Loss of motor control

- Loss of clothing

- Loss of money

- Loss of virginity

- Table dancing

- Headache

- Dehydration

- Dry mouth

- And a desire to sing Karaoke

WARNINGS:

* The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

* The consumption of Margaritas may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.

* The consumption of Margaritas may cause you to think you can sing.

* The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.

Please share this with other women who may need Margaritas.

Nat, I guess I would like to learn something new. I won't be interracting with other students if I can help it, I am going to do it online....I did actually look at the computer science degree, but it seemed to be very general, not really specializing in any one area...

Goodluck on whatever you decide!

Clubwear fail!

I hope that's fake or she's mentally ill!

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