monthly support from fiance

[mary&tom 0]

Anyways, I go pick them up one day, and I notice they're missing an item of mine. So I'm like 'where is my blouse?' and after much stalling and 'i dunnos' she goes

'your shirt...go BOOM!'

I'm like 'how can a shirt go boom?' so they get the mgr on the phone, and it turns out there was supposedly a fire and my shirt was one of the casulaties. Really pizzed me off

So now I'm stuck with the local dry cleaner who charges an arm and a leg

wow! that's scary!

have we officially hijacked this thread yet?

mary

[mawilson 2,133]

I am saying you come across as judgemental... and this is not the first time I have observed this. You were not so harshly opinionated when you first came here... now you are...

Yep....LisaD is judgemental and opinionated.....and I love it!

[Fandango 1,440]

I am saying you come across as judgemental... and this is not the first time I have observed this. You were not so harshly opinionated when you first came here... now you are...

Yep....LisaD is judgemental and opinionated.....and I love it!

Aww you say the sweetest things

Anyways, I go pick them up one day, and I notice they're missing an item of mine. So I'm like 'where is my blouse?' and after much stalling and 'i dunnos' she goes

'your shirt...go BOOM!'

I'm like 'how can a shirt go boom?' so they get the mgr on the phone, and it turns out there was supposedly a fire and my shirt was one of the casulaties. Really pizzed me off

So now I'm stuck with the local dry cleaner who charges an arm and a leg

wow! that's scary!

have we officially hijacked this thread yet?

mary

A tenner says it goes back on topic by the end of today

[Ban Hammer 13,516]

I am saying you come across as judgemental... and this is not the first time I have observed this. You were not so harshly opinionated when you first came here... now you are...

Yep....LisaD is judgemental and opinionated.....and I love it!

say it ain't so!

[eric&gen 0]

and I though american women were greedy

[one...two...tree 2,762]

So often I see posts from those that think there is some unwritten rule that when you log in to VJ, everyone is going to agree with you and tell you how wonderful you are. Who made the rule that I have to agree with anyone and I can't point out an obvious scammer? I'd rather be blunt and accurate and helpful than spending my post time spewing insincere sweet support for every situation.

Which is more supportive?

Post: I'm starving and cold.

Reply 1: I'm sure everthing is going to be just fine. I wish you luck.

Reply 2: Get off your lazy butt and get a job and buy some food and a coat.

I don't think there's any problem expressing your opinion or making a judgment about someone else who posts here but especially in OT, it seems to be a free-for-all frenzy of insults targeted at anyone who dares to speak up and say something that doesn't conform with the populace. John, Shannon had done this to you in the other thread and she stepped way over the line. Well, in this thread people were calling the OP a mail-order bride, that she's looking for a sugar daddy, and that she's only in it for the green card. In my opinon, that was totally uncalled for and offensive not only to the OP but to anyone of us here with similar circumstances. Not only that, it violates the terms and conditions of this site. None of us are paying for this site which shocked me when I first joined because somebody is footing the bill for us. We owe it to them out of respect to honor those terms and conditions or leave.

Edited August 6, 2006 by Steven_and_Jinky

[Melo 1]

You know I don't really care what you think of me Lisa... call me a hypocrite, accuse me of visa fraud... it rolls off my back... VJ has changed... it is no longer a supportive, caring community. It has turned into a judgemental one and one where "Oh look I have found another fraudster, ain't I great!!!" I am fed up with the nastiness. Others have left VJ coz of this - I am not going to leave... coz of some people here that are my friends...

I never wanted to even visit the USA... and it is coz of this I'm better than you, self-righteous attitude that so many people have... not all or I would not be moving to the USA to marry an American... I will never become an American national - that is for sure. I know many Americans that do not fit this mold - but the ones that do sicken me... just like George W Bush does.

[Fandango 1,440]

You know I don't really care what you think of me Lisa... call me a hypocrite, accuse me of visa fraud... it rolls off my back... VJ has changed... it is no longer a supportive, caring community. It has turned into a judgemental one and one where "Oh look I have found another fraudster, ain't I great!!!" I am fed up with the nastiness. Others have left VJ coz of this - I am not going to leave... coz of some people here that are my friends...

I never wanted to even visit the USA... and it is coz of this I'm better than you, self-righteous attitude that so many people have... not all or I would not be moving to the USA to marry an American... I will never become an American national - that is for sure. I know many Americans that do not fit this mold - but the ones that do sicken me... just like George W Bush does.

Hhaha, stop being so judgemental about Americans...wow, Melo that's harsh and unsupportive!

Here's a question....Why in the world are you making this about you??? I haven't said tickety boo to you concerning your relationship. I never ONCE accussed you of visa fraud. Wow, Here I am thinking you're just championing the rights to 'be nice to everyone' yet you're sat here making this about you? Hah, go figure...

I never said I was better than anyone else, so stop putting words in my mouth...but **'s sake...I have a right to an opinion...get over it! But hrmm, I'm wondering since you feel 'too good' to be an American national, how you think professing this makes you think you're not a hypocrite... Wow, that's so harsh! You shouldn't really judge people like that, Melo...don't you know it's not nice?

Oh, and if you want to find a place to wrap you in cotton wool & coddle you, well...good luck with that

[Ban Hammer 13,516]

[Melo 1]

You have no accused me of visa fraud... but you have the OP... yes I am harsh... this is not about me... this is about attitudes... the manner in which people are treated... if you can't see it then well... there is none so blind as he or she that does not want to see...

You are entitled to your opinions - it is when you state your opinions as if they are the gospel truth that I have a problem... you say it is frauid therefore it is... what do you base your judgement on one badly constructed paragraph... you feel that it is enough to base your judgement on... you do not think there could be any other motive other than she is a gold digger seeking a green card... I find that presumptuous and judgemental...

You did not like what I said about some Americans... hmmmmmmmmmmmm and I don't think I'm too good to be an American national... I am just not American and nothing in the world will make me one...

I recall how you treat your friends too... Lisa... those "friends" who were hurt to the point where they left... so yeah you do know how to be caring and supportive.

I state again I could not care less what you think of me... just coz you have called me a hypocrite doe not make me one... though since you seem to believe you speak with the kind of moral authority of the gospels I am sure you believe that it is the truth.

[dalegg 143]

have we officially hijacked this thread yet?

mary

No, it's right on track now..

Since you seem to be against forming judgements...why judge me? Why assume that it gives me 'nothing more than a feeling of self-righteous satisfaction'? You don't know me, you don't know what my opinions give me. While you're preaching 'no judgements' perhaps you should keep that in mind while you tell me I'm full of chit

I am not telling you are full of ######... I am saying you come across as judgemental... and this is not the first time I have observed this..... I am sorry that I came across as judgemental

Don't hide behind an apology that you obviously don't mean!

You know I don't really care what you think of me Lisa...

stop putting words in my mouth...but **'s sake...I have a right to an opinion...get over it!

I state again I could not care less what you think of me...

[Fandango 1,440]

You have no accused me of visa fraud... but you have the OP... yes I am harsh...

Yet I can't be, go figure

this is not about me... this is about attitudes... the manner in which people are treated... if you can't see it then well... there is none so blind as he or she that does not want to see...

Firstly, if it's not about you, then why did you bring yourself up? Oh well nevermind!

As far as the 'none so blind' bit....I wholeheartedly agree!

You are entitled to your opinions - it is when you state your opinions as if they are the gospel truth that I have a problem...

they are my truth, just like yours are yours...see how that works?

you say it is frauid therefore it is... what do you base your judgement on one badly constructed paragraph...you feel that it is enough to base your judgement on... you do not think there could be any other motive other than she is a gold digger seeking a green card... I find that presumptuous and judgemental...

I've explained my reasoning on more than one post here...perhaps a re-read would help? I've also allowed the possibility that I may be wrong, despite my strong opinion. So yeah, re-read!

I didnt' call her a gold digger...that was someone else....it may be presumptuous and it's definitely judgemental, yet you're doing the same thing with me, but that's ok...

You did not like what I said about some Americans... hmmmmmmmmmmmm and I don't think I'm too good to be an American national... I am just not American and nothing in the world will make me one...

It's not that I didn't like it, I was pointing out your hypocrisy. I couldn't care less if you become one or not

I recall how you treat your friends too... Lisa... those "friends" who were hurt to the point where they left... so yeah you do know how to be caring and supportive.

Let's not recreate history, ok? Michelle was a drama queen who put her whole life out there, and if you said owt in pvt that she didn't like, you were the azzhole. So yeah, I stopped blowin sunshine up her butt and I became public enemy #1. I didn't run her off...she chose to leave. As far as Sukie? Well I have nowt against her, and her choices were her business.

I state again I could not care less what you think of me... just coz you have called me a hypocrite doe not make me one... though since you seem to believe you speak with the kind of moral authority of the gospels I am sure you believe that it is the truth.

No, your hypocritical views make you one I don't really have an opinion of you, Melo...but it's fun pointing out your 'different set of rules' for yourself and others

[Melo 1]

I do not have a different set of rules... the fact of the matter is you based your judgeent on one paragraph.. I have based mine on the last few months of your posts... perhaps that is really not the way you are... perhaps you are different in "real life" as against this virtual reality... I would not know... nor do I care to know.

The point I was trying to make which of course has eluded you - is this - you don't have to be nasty... if someone had treated you the way you treat newbies you would not be here today.

As for Michelle - she was a nice person - never had a nasty word to say to anyone... so what if she was a drama queen??? Everyone can be that way... oooooooops I forgot I am talking to the perfect being who never does, says or thinks anything that could be wrong.

If saying what I have to you makes me a hypocrite then I am glad to be one...

I don't plan on responding to your next post... but there remains the possibility that I won't be able to resist.

[Fandango 1,440]

I do not have a different set of rules... the fact of the matter is you based your judgeent on one paragraph.. I have based mine on the last few months of your posts... perhaps that is really not the way you are... perhaps you are different in "real life" as against this virtual reality... I would not know... nor do I care to know.

The point I was trying to make which of course has eluded you - is this - you don't have to be nasty... if someone had treated you the way you treat newbies you would not be here today.

As for Michelle - she was a nice person - never had a nasty word to say to anyone... so what if she was a drama queen??? Everyone can be that way... oooooooops I forgot I am talking to the perfect being who never does, says or thinks anything that could be wrong.

If saying what I have to you makes me a hypocrite then I am glad to be one...

I don't plan on responding to your next post... but there remains the possibility that I won't be able to resist.

'Oh I'm judging you on blah de blah so that's ok'...hypocrisy, thy name is Melo!

First of all, this has nothing to do with Michelle. The funny thing is you have the complete wrong idea of what happened, but it's funny to see you think you know. There is more to the story that I have decided to keep private, which would, funnily enough, make people realize just what went down & how hard I tried to walk on eggshells around her to make her happy. A few people on here know, but those are only the people who I deem my true VJ buddies, so I don't blame you for thinking you know what's what when it's clear you don't.

Secondly, I never said I was a perfect human being, so once again...stop putting words in my mouth. For the umpteenth time, I have told you that I will allow the possibility that I've gotten this wrong, and if that's the case, will sincerely apologise. So how you can say summat like this defies logic, or at the very least, defies reading comprehension.

Finally, You don't like what I say? Ignore me then...you are not my mother & you certainly don't have the right to tell me how to live my life. Get over yourself hon, your opinion is not that important to me...deal with it

oh, and PS...I'm not going to respond to your next post, or maybe I will...wtg to straddle that fence!

[*Robert* 2]

So often I see posts from those that think there is some unwritten rule that when you log in to VJ, everyone is going to agree with you and tell you how wonderful you are. Who made the rule that I have to agree with anyone and I can't point out an obvious scammer? I'd rather be blunt and accurate and helpful than spending my post time spewing insincere sweet support for every situation.

Which is more supportive?

Post: I'm starving and cold.

Reply 1: I'm sure everthing is going to be just fine. I wish you luck.

Reply 2: Get off your lazy butt and get a job and buy some food and a coat.

Excellent example John. Both of the replies fit the statement, however if you were to post reply 2, you are told you are disrespectful and unsupportive? In that particular example I would give that same kind of advice to a close friend, why should a treat a complete stranger any different?

And just to point out, if people were wrong, or made incorrect assumptions about the OP, why has she not come back and cleared up any of the confussion, rather than only applaud people who have jumped on her side, or make rude comments?

I would say the majority of the time someone gets defensive, or upset, after being called out, indicates that what they did or said, was in fact wrong. I don't feel there was any confusion in what the OP was asking, and by asking it on an open forum, shows that she is mostly interested in money.

"mahal kita walang tae. kailangan ng pera."

I'm also not telling the others to not give their opinions. Seems that it's always the happy rainbow crowd who wants the other side to not be allowed to speak, or to jump on them if they do give their opinion. Sorry....life isn't always nice. If I think someone is doing something nasty - like marrying someone for money or a visa - I'm gonna bloody say so. If I'm wrong, I'll apologize.