Thinking Canadian in the USA

[Udella&Wiz 325]

I'm going to be moving from a very liberal Toronto, to Dallas, Texas. I must say the idea of moving to a Red state has me a little worried. On my first visit there I found everyone very friendly and polite where ever I went (gotta love that southern charm). But on meeting my fiance's step father for the first time he (step-dad) started going on about how they have a horrible president who is trying to make the USA into a communist country with this "health care fiasco" blah, blah, blah and how he is just going to trust in GOD to fix his country. I had to just smile and nod, smile and nod. My fiance never votes and finds it funny that I want to eventually become a US citzen so I can.

Jerry had told me that Toronto was more diverse that Dallas, but I found it surprising how segregated it seems like the people of different races keep themselves in Dallas. This of course is just based on a 5 day visit, so my first impression may be not completely true. There is definately an undertone of racism that I don't enjoy.

Here in VA I also find things very segregated...it's the Mexicans'..the Koreans...the whites...the african americans. Not that our neighbourhood doesn't have a little diversity....but we've got to be 60%white 20% korean, 19%black and 1% spanish (read mexican...because that's what most people will try to tell you). A large city like TO has a better grip on diversity then some places here, but I'm willing to bet the mix is better in say NYC. Big cities are always like that.

As Trailmix noted above...I do find that it seems more acceptable to say racist things about other groups in the work place...bakc in Canada, you just didn't hear it...in my case anyway

Edited April 14, 2010 by Udella&Wiz

[The_Dude 1,142]

Here in VA I also find things very segregated...it's the Mexicans'..the Koreans...the whites...the african americans. Not that our neighbourhood doesn't have a little diversity....but we've got to be 60%white 20% korean, 19%black and 1% spanish (read mexican...because that's what most people will try to tell you). A large city like TO has a better grip on diversity then some places here, but I'm willing to bet the mix is better in say NYC. Big cities are always like that.

As Trailmix noted above...I do find that it seems more acceptable to say racist things about other groups in the work place...bakc in Canada, you just didn't hear it...in my case anyway

My family is quite diverse, and they by and large choose to segregate themselves. At one point, both my father and mothers family lived in the same general area (Westside of Los Angeles). They eventually moved to different parts because they wanted to be in a more amicable community. I've heard numerous slurs in canada, against people of middle easter decent and the french. Although, I dont' think you can classify french as a race.

[Miranda&John 0]

The general American focus on 'me first' or 'my needs are more important than yours' or 'what I want is more important than what you want'.

This one really frustrates me. Sometimes I think people here are incapable of seeing things from another person's perspective. As long as their needs are taken care of, who cares about anyone else. And what is good enough for me, is good enough for you - circumstances be damned. It's almost unreal. I had to stop myself from reading the news so much, because when I would read the comments on the news stories, I'd start having physical responses to the anger I felt from the ignorance and stupidity that some people spout. I feel like back in Canada, there wasn't as much of that. Or at least, I could respect other people's opinions because they were based on something. With the heathcare debate, a lot of people are really against the bill (even though it is now a LAW), but they couldn't even articulate why.

And the funny part is, almost all of our friends are conservative. I have a perfect example of my frustration. A wife of a friend posted on her facebook the other day, and here is how the conversation went :

K "Make no mistake, a 'yes' vote on the Democrats' health care bill is a vote for taxpayer-funded abortions."- tis the truth! As a catholic and as woman I find this revolting....pro-life all the way~!

23 March at 12:52 ·

M But there is an existing law prohibiting federal funds for abortions, there is nothing in the heathcare bill that mentions that, AND the President himself signed an executive order reaffirming that no government money will be used...? Why do you think this?23 March at 13:56 ·

K An executive order won't supersede legislation passed by Congress and courts will look to the legislation rather than the executive order when ruling on federally funded abortions.23 March at 18:47

M I know, but there already is legislation. The Hyde amendment. Google it. The executive order was just overkill to try ease the minds of over-zealous republicans.23 March at 19:05 ·

K Whatever it may be I don't trust Obama. He is a liar and a snake. He's represents everything I don't believe in. Thanks for your thoughts though! 23 March at 19:10

Since when did BELIEF hold more weight than FACT?

[The_Dude 1,142]

This one really frustrates me. Sometimes I think people here are incapable of seeing things from another person's perspective. As long as their needs are taken care of, who cares about anyone else. And what is good enough for me, is good enough for you - circumstances be damned. It's almost unreal. I had to stop myself from reading the news so much, because when I would read the comments on the news stories, I'd start having physical responses to the anger I felt from the ignorance and stupidity that some people spout. I feel like back in Canada, there wasn't as much of that. Or at least, I could respect other people's opinions because they were based on something. With the heathcare debate, a lot of people are really against the bill (even though it is now a LAW), but they couldn't even articulate why.

And the funny part is, almost all of our friends are conservative. I have a perfect example of my frustration. A wife of a friend posted on her facebook the other day, and here is how the conversation went :

K "Make no mistake, a 'yes' vote on the Democrats' health care bill is a vote for taxpayer-funded abortions."- tis the truth! As a catholic and as woman I find this revolting....pro-life all the way~!

23 March at 12:52 ·

M But there is an existing law prohibiting federal funds for abortions, there is nothing in the heathcare bill that mentions that, AND the President himself signed an executive order reaffirming that no government money will be used...? Why do you think this?23 March at 13:56 ·

K An executive order won't supersede legislation passed by Congress and courts will look to the legislation rather than the executive order when ruling on federally funded abortions.23 March at 18:47

M I know, but there already is legislation. The Hyde amendment. Google it. The executive order was just overkill to try ease the minds of over-zealous republicans.23 March at 19:05 ·

K Whatever it may be I don't trust Obama. He is a liar and a snake. He's represents everything I don't believe in. Thanks for your thoughts though! 23 March at 19:10

Since when did BELIEF hold more weight than FACT?

Wow, that is quite delusional. The facts are in plain site, and his/her only response is "I don't trust Obama, he's a snake". As an american, this truly is the bane of our political system. Too many people superimpose their religious beliefs onto the political system and refuse to believe facts that don't fall into their narrowly defined set of morals.

[Revenesque 2]

Maternity leave. The people I know in the US who are having children have to go back to work pretty much right away. I guess I got used to the 1-year paid leave in Canada. They don't appreciate hearing about that, for some reason

Ha! Indeed!

[Udella&Wiz 325]

My family is quite diverse, and they by and large choose to segregate themselves. At one point, both my father and mothers family lived in the same general area (Westside of Los Angeles). They eventually moved to different parts because they wanted to be in a more amicable community. I've heard numerous slurs in canada, against people of middle easter decent and the french. Although, I dont' think you can classify french as a race.

Good one yes...Canadians like to pick on certain groups too...French, Native and those of Pakistani or Indian background are right up there(I can't bring myself to say the derogatory word...but everyone knows it...) As I noted...its generally a regional thing.

Wow, that is quite delusional. The facts are in plain site, and his/her only response is "I don't trust Obama, he's a snake". As an american, this truly is the bane of our political system. Too many people superimpose their religious beliefs onto the political system and refuse to believe facts that don't fall into their narrowly defined set of morals.

Also a good one

[kballtex 0]

USC Chiming in here - Where I'm from we're raised to be polite - perhaps moreso than some places in Canada (I get odd reactions when I say "Yes, Sir" and "no, Ma'm"). As for the general difference in attitude my observation is a culture of "sky's the limit, but not much of a safety net" (US) versus "there's a ceiling, but if you fall the safety net is pretty decent" (Canada).

So a lot of the attitude you might see there is just a by-product I'd say. Also the politics thing is a bit worse in recent times, but there are always going to be crazies on either side.

[CDAgirlMI 51]

Money.

Comparing the Canadians I know to the Americans I know, I find Canadians save their money a lot better than Americans.

[Sprailenes 47]

Good one yes...Canadians like to pick on certain groups too...French, Native and those of Pakistani or Indian background are right up there(I can't bring myself to say the derogatory word...but everyone knows it...) As I noted...its generally a regional thing.

Also a good one

Yea I was going to say the same thing. I experienced a hell of a lot more racism in Canada than I ever have here. They just pick on different groups there.

[Hugglebuggles 60]

I think a lot of these experiences are based on where you moved from Canada, and where you now live in the US. Moving from a liberal metropolis like Toronto to a "red state" like Texas is going to result in huge cultural and political differences, absolutely.

I moved from small town southern Ontario and now live in medium sized town Colorado and for the most part I don't really notice huge differences. There is a huge religious focus here, so christian social political issues tend to be more important than I think the Canadian political culture would focus on, but as someone who was educated in the Catholic school system for 12 years, this is completely normal to me. I'm very used to it. Christian conservatives are the most passionate people I've ever met when it comes to politics, but I also grew up with them, so I get the mentality even though I disagree it it 90% of the time.

In my opinion, Coloradans are a lot like Canadians. I think that's because the vast majority of people I meet here are transplants from elsewhere in the US and even the world. You get a pretty diverse range of people, even Canadians. It seems as though every time I tell someone I'm from Canada they either say, "oh I love Canada, where in Canada are you from?" or I get "oh my dad is from Canada" or "my best friend is from Canada!" I really can't believe how many Canadian connections exist here.

Most of the "cultural" differences I notice are pretty superficial but still annoying. Like, wearing shoes in the house. I hate when people come over and walk through the house with shoes on, what the heck! I'm pretty sure that is an American thing. Back home you take your shoes off when you walk in the door- it's a sign of respect for the person your visiting.

Food too. It bothers me what people here consider a side dish. Like, chips. Chips? I'm pretty sure a bag of lays isn't a sufficient side dish. Or, cottage cheese? Where I'm from that's a snack, or a cooking additive, not what you eat with your burger at a BBQ. Maybe that just a family difference- my Canadian family versus my husbands US family, but it drives me batty.

[Spoom 8]

I moved from London, Ontario to rural Pennsylvania outside Erie.

I'm surrounded by (often far-right) conservatives. It hurts my brain sometimes. I've gone back and forth on Facebook and Myspace with folks like Miranda&John's friends and experienced much the same... plus the dinner conversations with my fiancee's family sometimes get to me, or their constant (constant) watching of Fox News. Glenn Beck is kind of an idol out here. I have found a few people that are (mostly) on my side politically, our pastor being one of them, but it does bother me a bit that I'm so outnumbered out here.

My wife runs a youth center. I remember one of the kids said something racist about Obama in his first conversation with me; I believe this was a middle-schooler.

Also, on that subject, it bugs me that there seems to be such a resistance to funding social programs out here. Our youth center struggles for funding, getting it primarily from a deal with the school board, churches, and private donations. I don't want to get too in-depth, but we run it for very, very little. My wife has sometimes bought food for the kids out of her own pocket because we were basically broke in the general fund.

Dah well. I just hope I can eventually get some decent healthcare once the federal government lets me work...

[beans 7]

I live in Maine..a very "Canadian" like state or thats how most Mainers say it anyways..and somedays the differences is overwhelming. I tried explaining to the girls at work the benefit of socialized health care. What it would mean to them if they lived in Canada. All they kept ranting on about is how could I deal with the thought of knowing someone was abusing healthcare. No matter how many times I said "Well, I never heard many stories about people abusing the Canadian health care system. I'm sure it happens frequently but I never hear much of it. But Dr.'s in Canada don't feel as great of a need to just give you something because you're here and you're paying for a service" and they just went on and on about what if they went to the doctors for a sore foot do you think thats okay? I said well if they feel something is wrong with them and they want to seek treatment that is their right to do so. I'm not a doctor, and if someone feels something is wrong then they have the right to go find out and get help for it.

The other things are: the lack of foreign food products in the grocery stores..I miss the superstore. Miss the labour laws, I hate that when I feel homesick that people (not my husband/family of course) will tell me to suck it up because this isn't Canada and its never going to be. They don't understand that I'm more than happy to pay taxes on items and income if I know its going to good causes.

And whats the deal with transit? In Winnipeg, I took the bus daily because 1. its eco friendly 2. its cheap and 3. i don't have to worry about parking, gas, etc. Here I take the bus and people look at me like I have the plague. don't get it.

America is great, and I'm glad I came here. But who knew a place so similar could be so very different. I agree w/ Kathryn on her view. I miss the sense of comraderie that you had with fellow Canadians vs. me first you second.

PS- sorry if this doesn't make sense my brain was in swirls thinking of all the examples where I missed Canada lol

Edited April 14, 2010 by beans

[Kathryn41 3,205]

Another one - and it may just be region specific - but the focus on religion. There are more churches here than there were Tim Horton's back home (ok, that was a joke!), but there are literally churches everywhere from the small cornerstore church to the mega-churches - in shopping malls, industrial parks, on 3 out of 4 street corners . . . . there are 4 different churches at the entrance to our subdivision beside each other and across the road from each other. While the US says it practices separation of Church and State it has been my experience that it does anything but - Church and State are very much married to each other in politics and daily life. And at the risk of raising ire, I don't see a lot of those 'Christian values" that were practiced by the Churches back home practiced here: intolerance, greed, vanity, judgment and fear seem to be at the core of many of these church's messages. I am not religious but my mother was and I remember her quiet faith that she lived every day of her life - tolerance, kindness, generosity and helping others regardless of who they were, where they lived, what they believed or in what situation they found themself. She didn't need recognition; she didn't need praise; she didn't need to make a big public statement that she was doing this in the name of Jesus or God - she didn't need anyone to know - her religion was between her and God and shared by the congregation at Church. Religion here is just - so 'in your face' - and if you don't believe what they believe you are one of 'them' and not 'us'. I am sorry if anyone feels offended by this observation, but it is another difference I have noted between Canada and the US - the attitude towards religion.

Edited April 14, 2010 by Kathryn41

[darkchilde794 5]

I definitely agree with maternity leave. My friend teaches at the college I work in and she is one sick puppy with a cold. I urged her to take the day off and she said she can't, because she has no maternity leave as a full-time instructor... so she is saving all her sick days for when she gives birth. My jaw dropped. And her husband gets no paternity leave. WTH??? Is she just expected to pop baby out and bam, go back to work? I was told that other full-timers get 2-3 weeks off, but even then, gawd, you haven't recovered from giving birth in that short period!

[CDAgirlMI 51]

Another one - and it may just be region specific - but the focus on religion. There are more churches here than there were Tim Horton's back home (ok, that was a joke!), but there are literally churches everywhere from the small cornerstore church to the mega-churches - in shopping malls, industrial parks, on 3 out of 4 street corners . . . . there are 4 different churches at the entrance to our subdivision beside each other and across the road from each other. While the US says it practices separation of Church and State it has been my experience that it does anything but - Church and State are very much married to each other in politics and daily life. And at the risk of raising ire, I don't see a lot of those 'Christian values" that were practiced by the Churches back home practiced here: intolerance, greed, vanity, judgment and fear seem to be at the core of many of these church's messages. I am not religious but my mother was and I remember her quiet faith that she lived every day of her life - tolerance, kindness, generosity and helping others regardless of who they were, where they lived, what they believed or in what situation they found themself. She didn't need recognition; she didn't need praise; she didn't need to make a big public statement that she was doing this in the name of Jesus or God - she didn't need anyone to know - her religion was between her and God and shared by the congregation at Church. Religion here is just - so 'in your face' - and if you don't believe what they believe you are one of 'them' and not 'us'. I am sorry if anyone feels offended by this observation, but it is another difference I have noted between Canada and the US - the attitude towards religion.

omg... we were in Georgia last month & I really noticed that!!!