Divorce or one more fraud?

[zainab786 1]

I have been posting threads of legal queries about immigration and stuff, this time its a bit different though, its about divorce.

When I am here in my country, my husband has filed for divorce without my information and he has been hiding it since 4 months, my hearing date has been passed as I did not have any info regarding divorce which I found out from my county's court after visiting their website and calling them on doubt.

I don't know if he could file it behind my back without informing? Is not serving the divorce papers Okay with the law? I still know nothing about the grounds and settlement issues obviously he must have not file it in my favor, He has taken over my everything, every asset, every money and every document. I am in another country with expired visa.

I cant afford an attorney, also searching pro bono would take time but his hearing is in June.

What are the options for me? I contacted county they said they cant give a legal advise. In that case, what can be done? At least to delay the process or something?

[Scott and Mhay 57]

Well, in alaska (im sure other states are the same) all you have to do is show you did your best to try and locate the other spouse (newspaper ads, private investigator, any other means to show they tried to look for the spouse). I know it is rare to get a divorce without serving the other with the papers. Of course your husband knew where you were right? I dont see how he could have gotten a divorce without you knowing though. If you were never formally served with papers, then I dont see how it is legal. Of course I have no idea on the laws of where your husband is from. You might want to google the divorce laws for his area too.

[belinda63 3,038]

I hate to say this knowing all the time and emotional energy you have expended in this relationship but it is time to cut your loses and move on. You were only together a few months so it is doubtful even if you had been present for the divorce hearing that you would have received anything unless you had brought significant assets into the marriage.

It was dirty dog that he did this to you and I feel really bad about it but I don't understand what you hope to gain from this.

[Brother Hesekiel 2,236]

Dear Zainab!

Frankly, I'm a bit confused.

You are in "your" country? Are you by any chance referring to the UK as your country? Aren't you living in the US with your husband?

If so, your husband filed for a divorce from you over 4 months ago? And during all this time you have been out of the country? Why? How? If it's a vacation, how can you afford such a long one, especially as you state you have no money for an attorney? If it's not a vacation, did you by any chance abandon your US residency?

Now, don't get this the wrong way, please. I don't know you, nor your husband, nor your particular situation, and, worse yet, I have no timeline to look at, don't know in what State your husband lives, how long you've been married, what kind or GC you have, and so on. Hence, I'm trying to understand the circumstances involved here by playing devil's advocate, referring to your husband as the devil here.

Apparently, you and your husband didn't do very well with one another in order for those things to happen. Generally speaking, you would need to have been served with the divorce papers. In order to file for divorce in absentia, your husband would have to prove that he made any reasonable effort to serve you, to no avail. That's not easy, unless he documents that you moved away from the US, in your case to the U.K. If that's true, and according to your post, he may have a way of showing that this is the case, he would indeed be able to get a court date set up.

For you this means you'd have to attend. Especially, if you do not want to get divorced. But, given what I've read from you, why wouldn't you? If you love your husband and want to stay married to him for that reason, I'd say, he appears not to be a very nice husband. Yet if he's not a very nice husband (purely circumstantial speculation on my part), why would you want to stay married to him? Is it, perhaps (verbally walking on glass right now), because you don't want to lose your GC?

If so, you are looking at an uphill battle. Assuming you have a 2-year GC (not a 10-year one), you'll have to remove conditions. If you husband is going to be able to get a divorce from you based on the fact that you abandoned him and your residence in the US by moving back to the U.K., that might be a difficult position for you.

Again, I've tried to touch a few cornerstones of this issue to show you where your husband and his attorney might want to go with this. What is necessary for more specific advice to you, in regard to the legal and immigration aspects to this problem, is your timeline, information on what kind of GC you have, what State you live in, and why you are in the U.K. for so long, if you are a lawful permanent resident of the U.S.

Looking forward for you to shed some light into the foggy night.

Until then . . .

[zainab786 1]

Thanks for your replies,

@Just Bon and Belinda I am not from UK, I have changed it now for security issues because he might can check the forum too.

Yes, I have lost my status, Its not about vacation or anything, Again thanks to his threatens, frauds and tricks. I don't want to be married because of green card or anything.. I want my property back as I have said in my post, My documents are more important to me than my money and jewelries he has in his custody,of course I want to try at least get those things back,

@Scott and mhay, I read about the laws in IL, and it says the same thing that it is necessary to serve the papers, I am also not sure now what trick he has done to file for divorce But after everything all I can do is to order the copies from internet? That is why I am concerned that I can at least inform the court that he has my property and delay my divorce till I get back there on other visa and do something about it?

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

I have been posting threads of legal queries about immigration and stuff, this time its a bit different though, its about divorce.

When I am here in my country, my husband has filed for divorce without my information and he has been hiding it since 4 months, my hearing date has been passed as I did not have any info regarding divorce which I found out from my county's court after visiting their website and calling them on doubt.

I don't know if he could file it behind my back without informing? Is not serving the divorce papers Okay with the law? I still know nothing about the grounds and settlement issues obviously he must have not file it in my favor, He has taken over my everything, every asset, every money and every document. I am in another country with expired visa.

I cant afford an attorney, also searching pro bono would take time but his hearing is in June.

What are the options for me? I contacted county they said they cant give a legal advise. In that case, what can be done? At least to delay the process or something?

Hi Zainab.

Back in January you were trying to find out how you could obtain a divorce without having to return to the US. It sounds like that problem has been resolved now. As mentioned above, in most states you can proceed with a divorce if you can show the courts that you've made a serious effort to locate your spouse so that they can be served with papers.

You can probably get your statement entered into the court record without hiring an attorney. Write a letter explaining everything that's happened. Have your signature notarized. Send it to the judge who is assigned to your divorce case. Be sure to write your case number on the letter, and be sure to explain how you were tricked into going back to Pakistan. If nothing else, this might case doubt on your husband's claim (or his attorney's, if he hired one) that he tried to locate you to serve you papers. Most family courts are somewhat informal, so there's a pretty good chance the judge will accept your letter in lieu of personal testimony, especially given the fact that you can't return to the US.

It's highly unlikely you'll get any of your things back, at this point. But, at least you'll have the divorce and be able to move on with your life.

[zainab786 1]

Thank you so much JimVaPhuong, You are always having a very good advise, I will be doing the same, I know which attorney he has hired I can see in information on my county's court website but how I will be able to know about the judge name who is dealing my case? How can I send a letter to judge without knowing his name? Is there any way finding it out?

[thongd4me 69]

Thank you so much JimVaPhuong, You are always having a very good advise, I will be doing the same, I know which attorney he has hired I can see in information on my county's court website but how I will be able to know about the judge name who is dealing my case? How can I send a letter to judge without knowing his name? Is there any way finding it out?

You should write to the address of the court shown on the initial complaint.

There should be something called an "index number" or "case number" or whatever.

Quote that and ask that it be brought to the attention of the judge as you can't

have representation there.

Even if you have the name & address of the opposing counsel (lawyer), you can

NOT communicate with his lawyer because according to time-honored US legal

custom, the opposing lawyer will just laugh in your face (I had it happen).

My lawyer got the best of him in the end so that's who laughs last.

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

You should write to the address of the court shown on the initial complaint.

There should be something called an "index number" or "case number" or whatever.

Quote that and ask that it be brought to the attention of the judge as you can't

have representation there.

Even if you have the name & address of the opposing counsel (lawyer), you can

NOT communicate with his lawyer because according to time-honored US legal

custom, the opposing lawyer will just laugh in your face (I had it happen).

My lawyer got the best of him in the end so that's who laughs last.

This is usually true, with some exceptions. If you choose to represent yourself, and if the court accepts this, then the attorney has no choice - they must negotiate with you.

I got the Cruella De Ville laugh from my ex-wife's attorney a few times. In the end, I also got the last laugh.

In this case, I think the most important reason for contacting the court is because the plaintiff (her husband) probably has claimed "whereabouts unknown" in lieu of serving the respondent (his wife) with papers. Contacting the court will make it clear that the respondent's whereabouts are NOT unknown, and her testimony (in the letter) will establish that the plaintiff always knew where she was because he sent her there. Whether the judge accepts the testimony or not is anybody's guess. Under the circumstances, unless the judge is barred from the accepting the testimony by law, I think they would allow the testimony to be admitted.

Zainab, if you don't know the name of the judge then just address your letter to the "Clerk of Courts". Include a cover letter asking the clerk to forward your testimony to the judge presiding over your case. You might also ask the clerk what the procedure would be for obtaining copies of all documents filed in the case so far. They'll probably tell you that you need to provide some identification and pay a fee for this.

[thongd4me 69]

This is usually true, with some exceptions. If you choose to represent yourself, and if the court accepts this, then the attorney has no choice - they must negotiate with you.

I got the Cruella De Ville laugh from my ex-wife's attorney a few times. In the end, I also got the last laugh.

In this case, I think the most important reason for contacting the court is because the plaintiff (her husband) probably has claimed "whereabouts unknown" in lieu of serving the respondent (his wife) with papers. Contacting the court will make it clear that the respondent's whereabouts are NOT unknown, and her testimony (in the letter) will establish that the plaintiff always knew where she was because he sent her there. Whether the judge accepts the testimony or not is anybody's guess. Under the circumstances, unless the judge is barred from the accepting the testimony by law, I think they would allow the testimony to be admitted.

Zainab, if you don't know the name of the judge then just address your letter to the "Clerk of Courts". Include a cover letter asking the clerk to forward your testimony to the judge presiding over your case. You might also ask the clerk what the procedure would be for obtaining copies of all documents filed in the case so far. They'll probably tell you that you need to provide some identification and pay a fee for this.

The funny thing is that when I started the "full court press" to finalize my divorce,

my attorney (who was with 20-20 hindsight incompetent) did NOT show up (was in the hospital).

In her place was a substitute who in 15 minutes convinced the judge to throw out

every attempt of the opposition to turn me upside down by the ankles & shake out

the loose change.

The punchline: My wife's attorney had retired and and there was also a substitute for him!

The sticky wicket: When one lawyer substitutes for another, there is something called an

"of counsel" relationship. The new lawyer swore up and down that she was not my lawyer

even if I wanted her to take sole possession of the case. Nobody, not even the local

bar association, told me exactly what I should do. A lawyer at work said "you need to

write a letter."

In short, I sent a letter to the old lawyer saying "thank you, you're fired" and appointed

the new one (with a copy to the new one & the court). It was only after that, that the

new one accepted the case. Before I did that there was all kind of BS about having to

confer with the old one and that really wasn't happening because she was not getting

out of the hospital any time soon. I had the help of the lawyer friend at work with the

wording of the letter so as not to bruise anyone's legal ego.

The legal process is a quirky one, but Jim's suggestions should be followed.

The court doesn't like to hear directly from litigants because the lawyers & judges

have their own language and secret handshakes but when a litigant presents

the court with convincing ID, a good reason for not having counsel on hand

and a clear case they have to listen. You may not get exactly the result you want

but there will be an end to this. I also doubt that you will be able to recover your

assets; it's a question of how much proof you can submit without actually going to

the US. The cost of going there (the judge may be able to help, but the ultimate

cost may be greater than the amount in dispute) would be borne by you. Once

there, you wouldn't be able to work and have living AND legal expenses to cover.