Am I being unreasonable here...?

[Fandango 1,439]

I gotta give it to him, I don't think I'm capable of being "in-character" for quite this long, not even on a message board.

Yeah I agree...and I usually find him really amusing

You can't fix a problem without all the facts. You gotta walk that line to get to the truth.

You think you can fix this problem? Only perfect can!

Lisa,

Shush before Mr. Flair tries to chop your boobs. He chopped incanada's earlier and poor thing is still traumatized.

he chops my boobs, I'll kick him in the balls

Wooooo!

You'd kick Slick Ric in the balls for not taking you to space mountain sooner.

Woooo!

Now why are you always making a mountain out of a molehill?

[mrc 0]

Ric,

Chill out, mang. I've always been a huge supporter. Read my earlier posts defending the words of the NATURE BOY. WOOOOO!

[Ric Flair 0]

Now why are you always making a mountain out of a molehill?

Woooo!

Ric Flair is the original 60 minute man. Space mountain might be the oldest ride in the park, but it has the longest line.

Ric Flair is used to being on top.

Wooooo!

[chri'stina 190]

great advice, huh? i hope they seem familiar, because they are the same exact words you offered someone else during her time of need.

You scare me.

she scares me too

I was thinking the same exact thing...

[Thingee 0]

Can't but thinking if someone kept yelling 'WOOOOOOOOO' on the 'space mountain ride' I'd be too busy laughing my a$$ off to enjoy it.

[Ric Flair 0]

Ric Flair says:

Get this thread back on topic or you're all getting chopped!

Thingee, it would be the thrill of your life. You can't be first, but you can be next.

Woooooo!

*holds hand out ready to chop the thread*

[Fandango 1,439]

Perfect, I'm wondering how he justified giving his bro $26k when you two are in debt?

[mrc 0]

Ric, thanks for being focused. Let's get this back on track.

[KarenCee 3]

I'm not giving advice. I'm just going to tell you that I was in the same type relationship. My ex didn't spend quite that much money, but he believed that spending money was exclusively for him. At any rate, I put up with it for nigh on 20 years. It finally took being physically hit in front of my then 3 yo to finally leave. The physical bruises and scars have long healed, but the emotional and mental abuse has been the hardest to heal. To be honest, I'm still not completely healed.

In my opinion, what he's doing to you amounts to emotional and mental abuse. I'm not going to tell you what you should do. Plenty of people on here have done that. The decision as to what you should do about this is totally up to you. If you can live like this, then by all means carry one. If not, then you have to decide what to do. I'm just sharing with you what I did. Now I'm with a man and in a real marriage. He is helping me heal emotionally and mentally.

It's up to you. What do you want?

[KaiserD 12]

Hope things get better for you

[almaty 19]

Now why are you always making a mountain out of a molehill?

Woooo!

Ric Flair is the original 60 minute man. Space mountain might be the oldest ride in the park, but it has the longest line.

Ric Flair is used to being on top.

Wooooo!

well, ric...you are the leader of the horsemen...

[perfect 39]

I give up.....

pointless sharing when it gets degraded to this...

I wish my husband would tell his side..he thinks and has said that he feels he is a "perfect husband". Modesty is not his middle name! However, he will not use websites like this and feels that people who use these kind of forums all have "emotional issues".

The gist of what he would say though, as he says to other people: he has abandonment issues, he finds it hard to get emotionally close to anyone, i'm the best thing that has ever happened to him, i worry too much about money, I should spend more money on clothes and nails and hair, i need to exercise more....

How would you feel if your husband/wife went out without you to the DIY store and came back having successfully made an application for $2000 credit with no discussion beforehand and every explanation of what he intends to do with those funds? Especially when I had spoken to him about the fact that he has a bad credit history which I have tried really hard to help him repair, suggesting that he make no further credit applications for at least the next six months, and then within less than one wek of that discussion, does that!! Happened a month ago!

I'm stil paying $300 every month for the back taxes which him and his wife didn't pay.

He thinks nothing of spending hundreds of dollars on his co-workers in order to prove how good a manager he is and be popular. Last year he spent over $500 on baseball tickets. I told him to make sure he claimed it as an expense but of course he never did. This year he bought them all desk art costing $250.

I thought I would surprise him with football and basketball tickets so bought enough for me, my son, my husband and his brother. He then told me that he had also asked a friend to come - so quess who isn't going now! Yep...me!

He refuses to take his blood pressure medication. His blood pressure was 206/165 and the doc put him on meds straight away warning him of the possibility of stroke and heart attack. He hasn't been taking them and has been getting severe and disabling headaches and I told him that I was concerned and would like him to take his medication responsibly. He said so what if he dies. I told him he was being selfish not considering the effects that would have on me and my son and he just laughed. He won't even take them because he cares about us!

It's our second anniversary in a few weeks, but I know that if I don't book something for it....it will pass by as just another ordinary day. Part of me thinks don't bother - if it's not important enough to him then why waste the effort, time and money, but on the other hand I want him to realize how important it is to me.

They're small things in themselves but I just couldn't help feeling that he doesn't love me enough when you put them altogether. I'm not asking for the world, just to feel valued in my decisions, opinions and as a wife should be.

OK...that's it - this thread is worn out and spoiled by some of the very negative comments.

I shall no longer bother you with my hormonal thoughts.

Thank you for those who gave words of insight and encouragement.

[isleta521 5]

Just want to say I'm sorry for what you are going through. As far as I can see, your husband does not have to say anything. You have said all as far as I can tell. I said run. But it is your husband and your life and you obviously love him very much but either way I just hope you find happiness.

I give up.....

pointless sharing when it gets degraded to this...

I wish my husband would tell his side..he thinks and has said that he feels he is a "perfect husband". Modesty is not his middle name! However, he will not use websites like this and feels that people who use these kind of forums all have "emotional issues".

The gist of what he would say though, as he says to other people: he has abandonment issues, he finds it hard to get emotionally close to anyone, i'm the best thing that has ever happened to him, i worry too much about money, I should spend more money on clothes and nails and hair, i need to exercise more....

How would you feel if your husband/wife went out without you to the DIY store and came back having successfully made an application for $2000 credit with no discussion beforehand and every explanation of what he intends to do with those funds? Especially when I had spoken to him about the fact that he has a bad credit history which I have tried really hard to help him repair, suggesting that he make no further credit applications for at least the next six months, and then within less than one wek of that discussion, does that!! Happened a month ago!

I'm stil paying $300 every month for the back taxes which him and his wife didn't pay.

He thinks nothing of spending hundreds of dollars on his co-workers in order to prove how good a manager he is and be popular. Last year he spent over $500 on baseball tickets. I told him to make sure he claimed it as an expense but of course he never did. This year he bought them all desk art costing $250.

I thought I would surprise him with football and basketball tickets so bought enough for me, my son, my husband and his brother. He then told me that he had also asked a friend to come - so quess who isn't going now! Yep...me!

He refuses to take his blood pressure medication. His blood pressure was 206/165 and the doc put him on meds straight away warning him of the possibility of stroke and heart attack. He hasn't been taking them and has been getting severe and disabling headaches and I told him that I was concerned and would like him to take his medication responsibly. He said so what if he dies. I told him he was being selfish not considering the effects that would have on me and my son and he just laughed. He won't even take them because he cares about us!

It's our second anniversary in a few weeks, but I know that if I don't book something for it....it will pass by as just another ordinary day. Part of me thinks don't bother - if it's not important enough to him then why waste the effort, time and money, but on the other hand I want him to realize how important it is to me.

They're small things in themselves but I just couldn't help feeling that he doesn't love me enough when you put them altogether. I'm not asking for the world, just to feel valued in my decisions, opinions and as a wife should be.

OK...that's it - this thread is worn out and spoiled by some of the very negative comments.

I shall no longer bother you with my hormonal thoughts.

Thank you for those who gave words of insight and encouragement.

Edited August 2, 2006 by isleta521

[Fandango 1,439]

I give up.....

pointless sharing when it gets degraded to this...

I wish my husband would tell his side..he thinks and has said that he feels he is a "perfect husband". Modesty is not his middle name! However, he will not use websites like this and feels that people who use these kind of forums all have "emotional issues".

The gist of what he would say though, as he says to other people: he has abandonment issues, he finds it hard to get emotionally close to anyone, i'm the best thing that has ever happened to him, i worry too much about money, I should spend more money on clothes and nails and hair, i need to exercise more....

How would you feel if your husband/wife went out without you to the DIY store and came back having successfully made an application for $2000 credit with no discussion beforehand and every explanation of what he intends to do with those funds? Especially when I had spoken to him about the fact that he has a bad credit history which I have tried really hard to help him repair, suggesting that he make no further credit applications for at least the next six months, and then within less than one wek of that discussion, does that!! Happened a month ago!

I'm stil paying $300 every month for the back taxes which him and his wife didn't pay.

He thinks nothing of spending hundreds of dollars on his co-workers in order to prove how good a manager he is and be popular. Last year he spent over $500 on baseball tickets. I told him to make sure he claimed it as an expense but of course he never did. This year he bought them all desk art costing $250.

I thought I would surprise him with football and basketball tickets so bought enough for me, my son, my husband and his brother. He then told me that he had also asked a friend to come - so quess who isn't going now! Yep...me!

He refuses to take his blood pressure medication. His blood pressure was 206/165 and the doc put him on meds straight away warning him of the possibility of stroke and heart attack. He hasn't been taking them and has been getting severe and disabling headaches and I told him that I was concerned and would like him to take his medication responsibly. He said so what if he dies. I told him he was being selfish not considering the effects that would have on me and my son and he just laughed. He won't even take them because he cares about us!

It's our second anniversary in a few weeks, but I know that if I don't book something for it....it will pass by as just another ordinary day. Part of me thinks don't bother - if it's not important enough to him then why waste the effort, time and money, but on the other hand I want him to realize how important it is to me.

They're small things in themselves but I just couldn't help feeling that he doesn't love me enough when you put them altogether. I'm not asking for the world, just to feel valued in my decisions, opinions and as a wife should be.

OK...that's it - this thread is worn out and spoiled by some of the very negative comments.

I shall no longer bother you with my hormonal thoughts.

Thank you for those who gave words of insight and encouragement.

Perfect, please don't go....I think this must be a good outlet for you to not necessarily hear other's thoughts...but to read your own words & come to terms with how you are feeling. Sometimes putting them in words that you can see is harder to ignore than justifying it on PMS.

For the record, I am sorry for my part of the derailment. It started out with the best of intentions, but I am sorry that it upset you.

I think you should just read what you wrote and figure out what you would say if it were someone else saying this.

Again, sorry for the derailment, and sorry that you're going thru this

[Angelica 0]

I don't like the sound of this guy......For the situation to improve, he is going to have to change, and people can if they want to. However, he has no reason, or will to change as he believes there is nothing amiss other than your "hormones". It's not him, it's you...well, as far as he's concerned anyway. If he didn't believe that when he looked at himself in the mirror he'd see a complete #######.

What do you want and need ? If it's him ....how do you see your future together ? He sounds selfish and insensitive to your feelings. Only you can decide what to do, and if you can't decide, well, I've always found that fate has a funny way of making your mind up for you....

Kim