Am I being unreasonable here...?

[perfect 39]

No sadly not a typo! When we refinanced our home last year he told me he was giving his brother $25K. Then when he got his bonus from work in May he told me he was giving his brother $1K. He also told me he was going to spend $1K on clothes for himself which he did ($1500 actually) Me...diddly squat...nada...zilch from either!

Edited August 2, 2006 by perfect

[Minfay 0]

The more you blame yourself for his problems the longer it's gonna take you to get the H*#@ out. Run....fast.....don't look back!!

[Ban Hammer 13,429]

No sadly not a typo! When we refinanced our home last year he told me he was giving his brother $25K. Then when he got his bonus from work in May he told me he was giving his brother $1K. He also told me he was going to spend $1K on clothes for himself which he did ($1500 actually) Me...diddly squat...nada...zilch from either!

where can i sign up to be his brother?

[Fandango 1,439]

No sadly not a typo! When we refinanced our home last year he told me he was giving his brother $25K. Then when he got his bonus from work in May he told me he was giving his brother $1K. He also told me he was going to spend $1K on clothes for himself which he did ($1500 actually) Me...diddly squat...nada...zilch from either!

Perfect, only you know the situation, so I'm not going to sit here and tell you what to do.

But as difficult as it is, try to remove yourself from the equation and read your first post here as if someone else had written it....then tell me what you think?

But I will say this...the fact that you've prefaced it all with the 'i've got pms' really concerns me because you're not even giving yourself the benefit of being angry without blaming it back on yourself....

[Alex+R 0]

But I will say this...the fact that you've prefaced it all with the 'i've got pms' really concerns me because you're not even giving yourself the benefit of being angry without blaming it back on yourself....

I agree...Perfect's husband is invalidating her feelings every day (calling her emotionally unstable when she voices her real concerns), and now she feels she doesn't even have the right to have them. I've been there.

Perfect, I hope you will consider what people here have said.

[munchkins 0]

so sorry to hear all this but as far as I can see and read, it is very much a one way system - all for him.

personally after 2 years of this, I would be long gone, my heart goes out to you, it's time to think of yourself and not blame the hormones.

[Ric Flair 0]

Woooo!

Ric Flair says:

There are two sides to every story. I wonder what his would be?

Wooooo!

[Fandango 1,439]

Ric Flair should shut the fuq up and know better than to drag his comedy act into a thread like this

Wooooo!

[irishgirl73 0]

It always amazes me how we can give the best advice to people-but never apply it to our own lives.....

*winks*

That'll change as you get older. Sometimes it takes a LONG while to learn a lesson, but once learned you never forget. You also realize that EVERYBODY ELSE can't be wrong....

that is soooooooo true The things I put up with in my twenties.....................I wouldn't go back for all the money in the world!

[Ric Flair 0]

Ric Flair should shut the fuq up and know better than to drag his comedy act into a thread like this

Wooooo!

Woooo!

No comedy LisaD, in fact a good question!

Woooo!

[mrc 0]

Actually, what Ric said isn't so bad. I was going to say something of the sort but I decided not to. I'm not saying perfect is lying to us, but I'd like to hear his story. If what she says is the truth, then she's obviously in a bad situation and should do something to rectify things.

Ric, keep doing what you do, Wooooo!

[irishgirl73 0]

No sadly not a typo! When we refinanced our home last year he told me he was giving his brother $25K. Then when he got his bonus from work in May he told me he was giving his brother $1K. He also told me he was going to spend $1K on clothes for himself which he did ($1500 actually) Me...diddly squat...nada...zilch from either!

Perfect, only you know the situation, so I'm not going to sit here and tell you what to do.

But as difficult as it is, try to remove yourself from the equation and read your first post here as if someone else had written it....then tell me what you think?

But I will say this...the fact that you've prefaced it all with the 'i've got pms' really concerns me because you're not even giving yourself the benefit of being angry without blaming it back on yourself....

that is what I was saying-read it as if you didn't write it!!!!! You will be amazed at how objective you will be about this.

Blaming the pms(in my opinion) is an excuse- you have been through a lot-emotional abuse can be worse than physical abuse. You may feel that some of this is your fault but IT IS NOT.

[anya-D 8]

No sadly not a typo! When we refinanced our home last year he told me he was giving his brother $25K. Then when he got his bonus from work in May he told me he was giving his brother $1K. He also told me he was going to spend $1K on clothes for himself which he did ($1500 actually) Me...diddly squat...nada...zilch from either!

Perfect, only you know the situation, so I'm not going to sit here and tell you what to do.

But as difficult as it is, try to remove yourself from the equation and read your first post here as if someone else had written it....then tell me what you think?

But I will say this...the fact that you've prefaced it all with the 'i've got pms' really concerns me because you're not even giving yourself the benefit of being angry without blaming it back on yourself....

that is what I was saying-read it as if you didn't write it!!!!! You will be amazed at how objective you will be about this.

Blaming the pms(in my opinion) is an excuse- you have been through a lot-emotional abuse can be worse than physical abuse. You may feel that some of this is your fault but IT IS NOT.

I feel the same.. I feel like perfect is in a denial or somesort like it. It's not healthy at all. If this is true.. i'd run away as fast as I can.

I wish U all the best

[isleta521 5]

RUN !!!

and keep the hormones instead

[Fandango 1,439]

I agree that the question is somewhat valid...but the woooos are unnecessary imo.

However, perfect is sat here sharing what she sees. Her perception is her reality. You don't need to hear both sides to see that there's a problem! I'm sure none of us would exaggerate marital discord for the sake of a thread...so you have to take it with a grain of salt that it's prolly worse than what she's saying (such as the 'I"m hormonal so let me rant' stuff)

We're not here to hear both sides of a story & then say who's right and who's wrong. We're just here to listen.