Failed marriage, can't get her to agree to divorce

[thongd4me 69]

The money could be from anywhere, but her family was doing better than average for the province. She was living rent free in the parents old apartment, and the surviving father was in a nursing home type place with an attendant. It is possible the money was her cut of the sale of the apartment when she vacated it to marry me. One of the siblings was in a hurry for her to move out so it could be sold.

My wife is only interested in taking any shortcut, or the easiest path possible. Higher education? Only if you can buy it, correction....only if somebody would BUY it for her.

She's 46. All she wants is to land a sugar daddy.

A friend notified her a local store was hiring, within walking distance. She mentioned she'd like to work at a clothing store.

I drove her there and she had trouble filling out the computer application.

They had some screening questions...

'Are you willing to work as early as 7:30 Am?' She selected 'No'.

'Can you lift up to 40 pounds?' She selected 'No'.

The application program told her 'sorry, you are not suitable for this opening' and ended the process.

I turned her around and pointed to the workers in the store, almost all of them late 60's or older.

'They can do this job. You can't?'

She didn't want to get up early......or have to lift anything. She's reasonably healthy, just lazy.

Now that you appear to have a clue, your course of action should be clear,

whatever you decide to do.

Just think that anything you do in the direction of "enabling" or perpetuating

her current behavior is likely to come back and bite you at an undetermined

future date. Protect yourself, your assets and your family. Until you have

the protection of a divorce decree I would be very careful about what you

allow her to do and how you continue to support her. Stay strong, this too

shall pass but it's up to you regarding how soon that happens.

[flabutch 0]

welcome to having a chinese wife, mine is about the same but just laff it off give yourself a break theirs alot of us out here in the same boat , just go on with life

[TracyTN 237]

Seeing as the OP last posted in this thread in JULY, I'd say he's moving on quite well.

[clueless55 18]

OK, I'll necro this thread to give an update.

A few days before the lease on the house was up, I got a call from the landlord that my wife and a 'friend' had a rental truck backed up to the house, and were loading up furniture.

She knew I was on the way home, had a week off from work, and I had told her she was welcome to some of the furniture, and household stuff, but to wait until I got home, and we had mutual witnesses.

I was 300 miles from my home town, so couldn't do much.

When I finally got to the house, all of her clothing was gone, some of 'my' furniture, and quite a bit of the household stuff.

She wasn't in the house for a few days. The neighbor described who the man was who helped her move, and I knew where he lived. I drove by his house to see 'our' washing machine in his carport, covered by one of 'our' quilts.

I didn't go on his property, but sent some emails off cc'ing the sleazebags boss. He is a 'job counselor' for a non-profit agency, that used to come by the ESL class she attended. He has a reputation for sniffing around the female students, the sleazy little troll.

OK. She claims she was flying to San Diego to live. A local chinese lady friend would drive her to the airport.

I finished moving out of the house. cut off her cellphone.

She emailed me a few times. I tracked her email. She was in the Newark, NJ area, not California, as she claimed.

Sadly, she didn't make it the whole winter up there. She called me from Las Vegas in mid January, and asked if I would sign a Nevada 'no fault' divorce if she sent me the papers.

I considered the options, got some advice, and even agreed to pay half, to speed it up and get it over with.

The Chinese paralegal was kind of a pain to deal with, but later she told me my ex-wife was very annoying.

(really?)

I got the certified divorce papers in April. I had one more email from my EX (Praise god!) demanding half of any income tax refund I got for 2010, since it was rightfully hers.

I reminded her the divorce papers she signed stated there was no provisions for division of assets with this type of proceeding, and no chance of appeal. Since she used a paralegal who is a locally certified Mandarin translator for the courts, I would guess she can't claim she didn't know what she signed.

Her conditional green card expired in early May. I have no idea if she is attempting to change status on her own, under VAWA, or whatever. I assumed I would hear from USCIS if she was?

I did have some contact with fraud investigators with ICE, who prepared a case on her, but the Prosecuting attorney was reluctant to take it to court.

Life goes on.

Guys, and ladies, I wish all of you a happy and loving marriage with decent people. I wish I had installed the damn keylogger a year earlier. She wouldn't have had the conditional green card, and @##$% marriage would have been a distant memory of a brief period of my screwed up life, by now.

[nane1104 146]

Thanks for the update, I am wishing you well for the future!