My fiance didnt want to marry

[joessie 0]

i hope this is the right place to post my case

couple weeks after i arrived to USA my fiance made it clear she don`t want to Finnish the process and get married. we have been together 4 years before we could make it happen, we have a daughter together. she tricked me to leave the house and 3 days after day she said she don`t want to marry me . she is seeing someone else and she might bring him home and this will hurt me, also she can not afford to feed another person( which was me) i was preparing to go back but then she started asking me to give my rights as a father on my daughter so her boy friend could adopt her when they marry as she mentioned, i couldn`t do that and thats the reason why i overstayed my visa. 6 months later she moved to a different state to live with hr boyfriend and toke our kid with her, during this time she insisted i sign the papers to give on my rights as a father if i want to see my daughter. now i am illegal and it has been 2 years now , i am kind of aware i have no options left but maybe there is a way i can fix my situation, so please anyone who has been through the same case or have any beneficial information.

thanks in advance

[Brother Hesekiel 2,236]

I assume you entered the US with a K-1 visa?

If so, this visa basically was "used up" the moment you entered the US of A. You then had 90 days to get married to your finance. The date that's stamped on the I-94 form in your passport tells you when you became "illegal" in the US.

Here in the US, the unmarried mother has the "right" to the child. Even if you were the mother, you could not take the child with you to Morocco without consent of the other parent. If you did, it would be kidnapping. But since you are the father and she is the mother, you have basically no rights to your child at all.

You cannot adjust status other than getting married to your ex-fiance. I'm sorry, but it does indeed look like you have no other option available to you. The moment you leave the US, you will trigger a 10-year ban from reentering.

The only, very, very faint chance you have might come in form of immigration reform, but not even the President of the United States has any idea at this time when it will come and what it will contain.

[joessie 0]

thtas what i`ve been told, what never make sense to me is, why wait 4 years before i could obtain the visa, why she filed for me if her plans were not to marry me. i know now its over but i still can find answers to those questions, i`ve been contacting lawyers and some has suggested i apply for asylum, but based on what? i am just so frustrated. its a big failure if i go back, i left my job and i was a police officer there. she ruined my life. lol

but lately i spoke to a lawyer and she mentioned something about self petition, i don`t know how that will work or if it will even work but if i decide to hire her i will need more explanation.

if anyone else reads my post, please don`t give up on someone you love, not when u make them leave their families and home and job and all , set your mind on what u want before you proceed , this is just unfair

Good luck

[Sayha or bust. 71]

Sorry to hear your misfortune. i will pray for you and hope your situation gets better.

We are what we think.

All that we are arises with our thoughts.

With our thoughts, we make our world.

Buddha

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

but lately i spoke to a lawyer and she mentioned something about self petition, i don`t know how that will work or if it will even work but if i decide to hire her i will need more explanation.

I'm not aware of any basis you have to self petition. You entered with a K1 visa. Marriage to the petitioner is pretty much the only way you could petition to adjust status. If you'd married her and immediately divorced, you would at least have some basis to self petition. You aren't eligible to apply for asylum as you'd have to file within a year of entering the US. Heck, you'd have more options if you had entered with a tourist visa and overstayed. At least you'd have the option of marrying some other US citizen.

I think the attorney is blowing smoke up your skirt to try to get some money out you.

You would have been much better off if you'd left the US when your fiancee decided not to marry you. You would have been able to put your life back together in Morocco, and you would have had a chance to get a tourist visa to occasionally return to the US and visit your daughter. As it stands now, you can't legally work in the US, you have no basis upon which to apply for a green card, and you'll incur an automatic 10 year ban from the US when you leave.

[New Beginnings 32]

I would contact the moroccan embassy in New York for assistance with your rights as a parent. You may not be able to take your child with you but you certainly do have rights as the father of the child. Contact them, they might be able to help you.

[Brother Hesekiel 2,236]

He has zero rights to the child. He was a sperm donor, fathering a child with an unmarried woman out of wedlock.

First of all he would have to prove that he's the girl's father indeed, which happens by DNA testing, once a judge issues a court order. Thereafter the only right he has is to pay child support until the child is old enough to care for herself, even from Morocco or the end of the World. If he fails to do that, the 10-year ban will extend to the day he dies without ever having seen his daughter again.

Let's not sugar coat the O.P.'s dire situation. This is not Morocco but the US. He not only has no rights to the child, but no legal status as well. The child is a US citizen, and he's an illegal immigrant. There's nothing the Moroccan embassy can do in his case, other than wishing him a pleasant trip home to Morocco.

I know that sounds incredibly heartless, but what point is there in clinging to something that simply doens't exist?

Edited March 3, 2010 by Just Bob

[JERIII 8]

He has zero rights to the child. He was a sperm donor, fathering a child with an unmarried woman out of wedlock.

First of all he would have to prove that he's the girl's father indeed, which happens by DNA testing, once a judge issues a court order. Thereafter the only right he has is to pay child support until the child is old enough to care for herself, even from Morocco or the end of the World. If he fails to do that, the 10-year ban will extend to the day he dies without ever having seen his daughter again.

Let's not sugar coat the O.P.'s dire situation. This is not Morocco but the US. He not only has no rights to the child, but no legal status as well. The child is a US citizen, and he's an illegal immigrant. There's nothing the Moroccan embassy can do in his case, other than wishing him a pleasant trip home to Morocco.

I know that sounds incredibly heartless, but what point is there in clinging to something that simply doens't exist?

The OP is indeed in a dire situation, but I am curious about the "facts" you are spouting about parental rights. Where did you get them?

Parental rights are determined on a state-by-state basis, there is no national law that governs this. The state laws vary widely. In some states the voluntary listing of a man on a birth certificate will establish paternity, even if the couple is not married. It is certainly not the case that DNA testing is always required. In some states a sworn statement can be used in lieu of a birth certificate. In addition, in some states anyone listed on birth certificate has rights, for example, to be consulted in case of an adoption. In some states, such parents have lots of rights, and in some states they have none. The OP may indeed have rights, whether he and the mother were married or not.

Of course, this is not likely to be of much help in the present case.

However, if his fiance threatened him or attempted to coerce him into signing away his parental rights, he might have a VAWA case. It would be a weak one, but I have heard of weaker ones.

[Golden Gate 530]

Go to the Friend of the Court at the courthouse in the town where your daughter was born and ask about filing to claim you are the father. They might send you to the district attorney's office. In fact, you can be illegal and still have rights as the father. However, it is true - if you can prove you are the father, they will expect you to pay child support. You have to be prepared for that. If they determine you have to pay a certain amount per month, and you can't pay, they can put you in jail until you pay. You can usually go to court and work out how much you can afford to pay for support.

[Ihavequestions 419]

I would further add that people don't take away anyone's rights. Only the legal system can do that. Not only that, "boyfriends" don't get to adopt. The way the American legal system is designed is to not deliberately bastardize a child, meaning, in the eyes of the law, children have the right to both a father and a mother. Whatever document the OP signed is quite likely garbage. Really, if was just that easy, there are quite probably thousands of parents who would sign a such a document because - for whatever reason, either they can't or they don't want to or whatever the case may be - financially supporting their child/ren is too much of an obligation.

What an unfortunate - even hideous - situation all around. OP, I wish you the best.

[John and Camie 39]

This breaks my heart. You are in my thoughts and prayers, joessie.

At the very least, this poor man could use some compassion mixed in with all the "straight talk."

[joessie 0]

well thanks u`ll for ur inputs

but i don`t need to run a DNA test to prove the child is mine, she was born her and she have my name on her birth certificate. she just looks like me, there is no way i can even think about the fact she is not my baby. indeed

my fiancee she abandoned me, she tricked me and kicked my #### nicely out from her house, and she ran to her (redneck) boyfriend, during this time i had a job and i could generate good money to even pay child support ( i don`t need a court to force me to do so, its my duty). but she never let me see my daughter unless i sign papers agreeing to give up on my rights as a father, some readers here my misunderstood my case.

after she broke up she moved to florida and she requested conciliation. which was good but this women is just full of ######,few days after that she changed her mind, things has a little changed and i could go see my daughter and i did this previous NOV in her birthday.

its not my fault she abandoned me and right away a week after i come here, this make no sense , at this time when the wound was still fresh i wanted to get back to my home but i was frightened she might just do something like take my right as a father , beside this why would i want to go back,, such a failure, left my job and everything behind. the law will not change and i know i got no options but i am not giving up and there is no way i can go back at least not for now, but i still can talk to her and try to fix things , do you guys think that will change anything even its late.i mean if we marry now?

[Golden Gate 530]

well thanks u`ll for ur inputs

but i don`t need to run a DNA test to prove the child is mine, she was born her and she have my name on her birth certificate. she just looks like me, there is no way i can even think about the fact she is not my baby. indeed

my fiancee she abandoned me, she tricked me and kicked my #### nicely out from her house, and she ran to her (redneck) boyfriend, during this time i had a job and i could generate good money to even pay child support ( i don`t need a court to force me to do so, its my duty). but she never let me see my daughter unless i sign papers agreeing to give up on my rights as a father, some readers here my misunderstood my case.

after she broke up she moved to florida and she requested conciliation. which was good but this women is just full of ######,few days after that she changed her mind, things has a little changed and i could go see my daughter and i did this previous NOV in her birthday.

its not my fault she abandoned me and right away a week after i come here, this make no sense , at this time when the wound was still fresh i wanted to get back to my home but i was frightened she might just do something like take my right as a father , beside this why would i want to go back,, such a failure, left my job and everything behind. thihings , do you guys think that will change anything even its late.i mean if we marry now?

It seems like your best bet is to talk to a lawyer about what you would be able to do if you marry her.