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Unbelievable, Unacceptable Spouse's Behaviour

By T_and_A in Moving to the US and Your New Life In America

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T_and_A Enthusiast

T_and_A   3

Posted
Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Philippines
 Timeline
Posted

With all the love we have for our dear spouse, still there are some of those behaviours that you don't expect and make you cringe your nose and say NO WAY... that is completely UNACCEPTABLE!

What are some of your spouse's misbehaviours that you find unacceptable and unbearable...

i'll start...

i wasn't feeling too good yesterday, managed to feed my baby, gave my baby to my parents to get him to sleep and ready to call in a night... too tired to get up, i asked my husband if he can do me a favor and fill the humidifier with water for me since my nose bleeds from dry air.... he did so after awhile, came back to the bedroom and poured cold water on me while im in bed dazing off too sleep... I got so mad and pissed, i find it so RUDE and UNRULY! I yelled at him... asking why he did that... he said he's just fooling around. I really feel bad right now... until this morning... until now. What do you do?

------- @>-@>-@>--------

AOS

Jul 23, 2008 ---> Mailed AOS, EAD and AP package

July 27, 2008 ---> check cleared

Jul 29, 2008 ---> NOA Date

Aug 2, 2008 ---> received confirmation mail for AOS, EAD and AP

Aug 9, 2008 ---> received biometrics appointment letter

Aug 21, 2008 ---> BIOMETRICS schedule at 3 pm

Aug 12, 2008 ---> took Biometrics in advance as a walk in

Aug 12, 2008 ---> touched

Aug 18, 2008 ---> I-485 notice of transfer to CSC

Sept 23, 2008 ---> touched

Nov 18, 2008 ---> GC RECEIVED!!!

EAD

Sept 30, 2008 ---> Card production ordered <expect to receive within 30 days>

Oct 11, 2008 ---> EAD received

AP

Sept 30, 2008 ---> AP approved <NOA mailed>

Oct 10, 2008 ---> AP received

ROC

Oct 11, 2010 ---> Mailed ROC packet

Oct 12, 2010 ---> Signed for and received by destination

Oct 14, 2010 ---> Money order cashed

Oct 18, 2010 ---> NOA1 received in mail

Nov 15, 2010 ---> Biometrics and fingerprinting appointment

Jan 28, 2011 ---> ROC approved

Jan 31, 2011 ---> Card mailed out

Feb 2, 2011 ---> Card received in the mail.

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TBoneTX Grand Master

TBoneTX   46,173

Posted
Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ecuador
 Timeline
Posted

When he least expects it, give him a Wedgie.

06-04-2007 = TSC stamps postal return-receipt for I-129f.

06-11-2007 = NOA1 date (unknown to me).

07-20-2007 = Phoned Immigration Officer; got WAC#; where's NOA1?

09-25-2007 = Touch (first-ever).

09-28-2007 = NOA1, 23 days after their 45-day promise to send it (grrrr).

10-20 & 11-14-2007 = Phoned ImmOffs; "still pending."

12-11-2007 = 180 days; file is "between workstations, may be early Jan."; touches 12/11 & 12/12.

12-18-2007 = Call; file is with Division 9 ofcr. (bckgrnd check); e-prompt to shake it; touch.

12-19-2007 = NOA2 by e-mail & web, dated 12-18-07 (187 days; 201 per VJ); in mail 12/24/07.

01-09-2008 = File from USCIS to NVC, 1-4-08; NVC creates file, 1/15/08; to consulate 1/16/08.

01-23-2008 = Consulate gets file; outdated Packet 4 mailed to fiancee 1/27/08; rec'd 3/3/08.

04-29-2008 = Fiancee's 4-min. consular interview, 8:30 a.m.; much evidence brought but not allowed to be presented (consul: "More proof! Second interview! Bring your fiance!").

05-05-2008 = Infuriating $12 call to non-English-speaking consulate appointment-setter.

05-06-2008 = Better $12 call to English-speaker; "joint" interview date 6/30/08 (my selection).

06-30-2008 = Stokes Interrogations w/Ecuadorian (not USC); "wait 2 weeks; we'll mail her."

07-2008 = Daily calls to DOS: "currently processing"; 8/05 = Phoned consulate, got Section Chief; wrote him.

08-07-08 = E-mail from consulate, promising to issue visa "as soon as we get her passport" (on 8/12, per DHL).

08-27-08 = Phoned consulate (they "couldn't find" our file); visa DHL'd 8/28; in hand 9/1; through POE on 10/9 with NO hassles(!).

Mononoke28 Grand Master

Mononoke28   135

Posted
Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Colombia
 Timeline
Posted

Oh man, that would not go well at my house I can tell you that right now. But then again, I can't picture my husband doing it either.

Diana

CR-1

02/05/07 - I-130 sent to NSC

05/03/07 - NOA2

05/10/07 - NVC receives petition, case # assigned

08/08/07 - Case Complete

09/27/07 - Interview, visa granted

10/02/07 - POE

11/16/07 - Received green card and Welcome to America letter in the mail

Removing Conditions

07/06/09 - I-751 sent to CSC

08/14/09 - Biometrics

09/27/09 - Approved

10/01/09 - Received 10 year green card

U.S. Citizenship

03/30/11 - N-400 sent via Priority Mail w/ delivery confirmation

05/12/11 - Biometrics

07/20/11 - Interview - passed

07/20/11 - Oath ceremony - same day as interview

sjr09 Experienced

sjr09   155

Posted
Filed: Lift. Cond. (apr) Country: Philippines
 Timeline
Posted
When he least expects it, give him a Wedgie.

What if he go’s commando?

'PAU' both wife and daughter in the U.S. 08/25/2009

Daughter's' CRBA Manila Embassy 08/07/2008 dual citizenship

http://crbausembassy....wordpress.com/

Amit-N-Melody Proficient

Amit-N-Melody   11

Posted
Filed: K-3 Visa Country: India
 Timeline
Posted

what an a$$, that is soooo not funny or cute... that is actually being passive aggressive... and then the sick SOB's try to cover it up with... I was just playing around... flipping pi$$ing me off and it wasnt even my husband..

I have nothing else to add... cuz i am hopelessly in love with my hubby... I will get back to you in 10 years when the new ness wears off :devil:

~ NVC Journey~

22 days at NVC

03/18/2010: Case Complete!

03/25/2010: Called NVC .. INTERVIEW May 27 @ 7:45!! Woot Woot

05/27/2010: Approved at the interview, but put on AP afterwards :(

06/27/2010: Really missing my Hubby :*(

07/29/2010: Visa Issued!! AP is OVER!!

07/31/2010: Visa in hand!!! Thank you GOD!

09/01/2010: POE JFK

2 Amazing Years Later!!!

~Lifting Conditions~

08/09/2012: File I-751 Packet

08/17/2012: NOA I-751 Receipt Notice recieved!

"Distance means nothing for love. Even the sun is so far away; yet, its energy blossoms the flowers on earth."

Kathryn41 Grand Master

Kathryn41   3,205

Posted
Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Canada
 Timeline
Posted (edited)

Geeze! That sounds very passive aggressive to me. I'd be tempted to do the same thing back to him one night and then say 'oh, but I was just fooling around. I thought you thought this was funny?' Not that you should do that, though. It is as 'funny' as those brides and groom that think it is ok to smush wedding cake in their spouse's face - which means, not at all funny. It sounds like he has some pent up hostility you might want to address with someone neutral like a counselor or a trusted Minster.

Edited by Kathryn41

“...Isn't it splendid to think of all the things there are to find out about? It just makes me feel glad to be alive--it's such an interesting world. It wouldn't be half so interesting if we knew all about everything, would it? There'd be no scope for imagination then, would there?”

.― Lucy Maude Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables

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Another Member of the VJ Fluffy Kitty Posse!

TBoneTX Grand Master

TBoneTX   46,173

Posted
Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ecuador
 Timeline
Posted
What if he go’s commando?
Wedgies are a sign of commitment, si man.

06-04-2007 = TSC stamps postal return-receipt for I-129f.

06-11-2007 = NOA1 date (unknown to me).

07-20-2007 = Phoned Immigration Officer; got WAC#; where's NOA1?

09-25-2007 = Touch (first-ever).

09-28-2007 = NOA1, 23 days after their 45-day promise to send it (grrrr).

10-20 & 11-14-2007 = Phoned ImmOffs; "still pending."

12-11-2007 = 180 days; file is "between workstations, may be early Jan."; touches 12/11 & 12/12.

12-18-2007 = Call; file is with Division 9 ofcr. (bckgrnd check); e-prompt to shake it; touch.

12-19-2007 = NOA2 by e-mail & web, dated 12-18-07 (187 days; 201 per VJ); in mail 12/24/07.

01-09-2008 = File from USCIS to NVC, 1-4-08; NVC creates file, 1/15/08; to consulate 1/16/08.

01-23-2008 = Consulate gets file; outdated Packet 4 mailed to fiancee 1/27/08; rec'd 3/3/08.

04-29-2008 = Fiancee's 4-min. consular interview, 8:30 a.m.; much evidence brought but not allowed to be presented (consul: "More proof! Second interview! Bring your fiance!").

05-05-2008 = Infuriating $12 call to non-English-speaking consulate appointment-setter.

05-06-2008 = Better $12 call to English-speaker; "joint" interview date 6/30/08 (my selection).

06-30-2008 = Stokes Interrogations w/Ecuadorian (not USC); "wait 2 weeks; we'll mail her."

07-2008 = Daily calls to DOS: "currently processing"; 8/05 = Phoned consulate, got Section Chief; wrote him.

08-07-08 = E-mail from consulate, promising to issue visa "as soon as we get her passport" (on 8/12, per DHL).

08-27-08 = Phoned consulate (they "couldn't find" our file); visa DHL'd 8/28; in hand 9/1; through POE on 10/9 with NO hassles(!).

Minya's wife Experienced

Minya's wife   25

Posted
Filed: Lift. Cond. (apr) Country: Hungary
 Timeline
Posted
With all the love we have for our dear spouse, still there are some of those behaviours that you don't expect and make you cringe your nose and say NO WAY... that is completely UNACCEPTABLE!

What are some of your spouse's misbehaviours that you find unacceptable and unbearable...

i'll start...

i wasn't feeling too good yesterday, managed to feed my baby, gave my baby to my parents to get him to sleep and ready to call in a night... too tired to get up, i asked my husband if he can do me a favor and fill the humidifier with water for me since my nose bleeds from dry air.... he did so after awhile, came back to the bedroom and poured cold water on me while im in bed dazing off too sleep... I got so mad and pissed, i find it so RUDE and UNRULY! I yelled at him... asking why he did that... he said he's just fooling around. I really feel bad right now... until this morning... until now. What do you do?

:o wow, and I thought I had it bad because my husband insists on leaving beer caps next to the bottle opener on the counter instead of popping them in the trash!

funny-dog-pictures-wtf.jpg
TBoneTX Grand Master

TBoneTX   46,173

Posted
Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ecuador
 Timeline
Posted
I thought I had it bad because my husband insists on leaving beer caps next to the bottle opener on the counter instead of popping them in the trash!
You poor girl! We must rally the VJ troops in your support, si man. :)

06-04-2007 = TSC stamps postal return-receipt for I-129f.

06-11-2007 = NOA1 date (unknown to me).

07-20-2007 = Phoned Immigration Officer; got WAC#; where's NOA1?

09-25-2007 = Touch (first-ever).

09-28-2007 = NOA1, 23 days after their 45-day promise to send it (grrrr).

10-20 & 11-14-2007 = Phoned ImmOffs; "still pending."

12-11-2007 = 180 days; file is "between workstations, may be early Jan."; touches 12/11 & 12/12.

12-18-2007 = Call; file is with Division 9 ofcr. (bckgrnd check); e-prompt to shake it; touch.

12-19-2007 = NOA2 by e-mail & web, dated 12-18-07 (187 days; 201 per VJ); in mail 12/24/07.

01-09-2008 = File from USCIS to NVC, 1-4-08; NVC creates file, 1/15/08; to consulate 1/16/08.

01-23-2008 = Consulate gets file; outdated Packet 4 mailed to fiancee 1/27/08; rec'd 3/3/08.

04-29-2008 = Fiancee's 4-min. consular interview, 8:30 a.m.; much evidence brought but not allowed to be presented (consul: "More proof! Second interview! Bring your fiance!").

05-05-2008 = Infuriating $12 call to non-English-speaking consulate appointment-setter.

05-06-2008 = Better $12 call to English-speaker; "joint" interview date 6/30/08 (my selection).

06-30-2008 = Stokes Interrogations w/Ecuadorian (not USC); "wait 2 weeks; we'll mail her."

07-2008 = Daily calls to DOS: "currently processing"; 8/05 = Phoned consulate, got Section Chief; wrote him.

08-07-08 = E-mail from consulate, promising to issue visa "as soon as we get her passport" (on 8/12, per DHL).

08-27-08 = Phoned consulate (they "couldn't find" our file); visa DHL'd 8/28; in hand 9/1; through POE on 10/9 with NO hassles(!).

~Johnny~ Rising Star

~Johnny~   27

Posted
Filed: Other Country: Ukraine
 Timeline
Posted
Geeze! That sounds very passive aggressive to me. I'd be tempted to do the same thing back to him one night and then say 'oh, but I was just fooling around. I thought you thought this was funny?' Not that you should do that, though. It is as 'funny' as those brides and groom that think it is ok to smush wedding cake in their spouse's face - which means, not at all funny. It sounds like he has some pent up hostility you might want to address with someone neutral like a counselor or a trusted Minster.

Well put... :thumbs:

I would still give him a cold water blast in his sleep....he deserves it.

~Johnny~

Terca Collaborator

Terca   6

Posted
Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Dominican Republic
 Timeline
Posted

My husband once passed gas, like dead animal gas, and kidnapped my face pillow when i tried to cover myself. I had to take it full force, burned the hair in my nose. He then passed out laughing and eventually I joined too ...

Now that we are apart I wish I could have at least that :crying:

wuha.jpgdU2lm5.png

 

N400 Mailed: 12/09/2016

Priority Date: 12/13/2016

Biometrics Appmt: 01/13/17

 

Ning Experienced

Ning   619

Posted
Filed: K-3 Visa Country: Thailand
 Timeline
Posted
With all the love we have for our dear spouse, still there are some of those behaviours that you don't expect and make you cringe your nose and say NO WAY... that is completely UNACCEPTABLE!

What are some of your spouse's misbehaviours that you find unacceptable and unbearable...

i'll start...

i wasn't feeling too good yesterday, managed to feed my baby, gave my baby to my parents to get him to sleep and ready to call in a night... too tired to get up, i asked my husband if he can do me a favor and fill the humidifier with water for me since my nose bleeds from dry air.... he did so after awhile, came back to the bedroom and poured cold water on me while im in bed dazing off too sleep... I got so mad and pissed, i find it so RUDE and UNRULY! I yelled at him... asking why he did that... he said he's just fooling around. I really feel bad right now... until this morning... until now. What do you do?

I try to find an immigration based web site to use as a sounding board. I want people I dont know to tell me what I should do. Such as go see a minister. I cant find a way myself to deal with my own problems so I always hope that others will do it for me. I find that whining on the net is cheaper & easiert than seeking the help I really need.

The last thing I do is to tell my husband to grow up & treat me with respect. If I do that I am afraid of what might happen so I just live with him.

slangofoil Collaborator

slangofoil   50

Posted
Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ireland
 Timeline
Posted
He did that to bond with you, to have fun with you while the baby was gone. He will try other small pranks until he finds out what works. This is good-natured stuff; it will get better as you get to know each other.

Bonding with her by pouring cold water on her while he knew she wasn't feeling well and was trying to get some rest? I think not. I would be livid. But this would never happen to me. My fiance would not pull something like that. I'd go absolutely mental on him.

I'm the USC petitioner.

Timeline:

10/06/2005 Met in Ireland while I was on a study abroad

03/15/2010 K-1 NOA1

05/27/2010 K-1 NOA2

09/10/2010 K-1 Interview

09/22/2010 POE

10/01/2010 Wedding

10/27/2010 AOS/EAD/AP NOA1s

12/22/2010 EAD/AP Approved

04/05/2011 AOS Approved - no interview

04/09/2011 Green Card received

01/24/2013 ROC NOA1

06/28/2013 ROC Approved - no interview

07/05/2013 10-year Green Card received

08/19/2014 N-400 NOA

12/06/2014 N-400 Interview

01/09/2014 Naturalization ceremony

My husband is now a US Citizen! Our journey is over!

20r8m4.png

WdKPm5.png

8PEOm5.png

 

 
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