25 year age difference....Older women marrying younger men

[h afifi 0]

I was in the same position as you. I am 25 yrs older than my husband and don't look my age. We have been married for 4 yrs with him finally arriving in the U.S. a jear ago. His first interview did not go well at all so I took a year off from work and went to Syria to be with him to prove it was ligit. His second interview I was there for and he recieved his visa to the states. When we arrived home I immediatly went back to work and we set out to get his 10 yr. green card. He got his green card 2 months ago. All this time he was saying how happy he was and how much he loved me and when he went to work he would help take care of us. Then boom 2 weeks ago he came to me and told me he didn't love me and he never did. All this was just for one thing and that was a gc.

I am not saying your husband is like that. I never would have thought mine was either. (I met his family and he was not raised that way. They are some of the finest people I have met.)

I am saying however to protect your self. I still love this man with all my heart even after all the ugly things he has said and done to me. I don't want to see anyone go thru the hurt and pain I am going thru now. And once a green card is given it will be too late.

Good luck to you! My prayers are with you.

Sorry to hear this , but u can get a record for him when he says he played you and submit it to DOS and they will punish him

[santa cruz 0]

He stayed home for the first year saying it would be cheaper in the long run. It did make me feel nervous but he never had given me a reason to doubt him. I have spoken with uscis and they told me what I already knew he is here and there isn't much I can do about it. I hope that what I am going thru no one else will ever have to endure. Now I am left with anger, hurt, betrayal and many more emotions. As well as trying to rebuild my life fianacially.

[marjus's girl 6]

He stayed home for the first year saying it would be cheaper in the long run. It did make me feel nervous but he never had given me a reason to doubt him. I have spoken with uscis and they told me what I already knew he is here and there isn't much I can do about it. I hope that what I am going thru no one else will ever have to endure. Now I am left with anger, hurt, betrayal and many more emotions. As well as trying to rebuild my life fianacially.

i think you have to call a fraud specific place..sorry this happen to you..try to get evidence of him saying he only wanted u for green card , such as email, txt and voicemail..good luck..maybe post on here about the fraud and someone can tell you exactly who you contact..

[santa cruz 0]

Thats what will be hard to do to get him repeat it. He is smart and has known every step to take to be legal. I had no clue this was coming. Things with him have always happened quickly. Never thought I would be in this position I really thought he loved me. I just hope others that are getting married to a much younger man be careful. Be very cautious in every step

[marie_yahya 11]

Hey everyone I have seen what you guys are talking about and I know first hand how that feels......me and my husband got married last february and we are now almost done with the CR1 We await our Interview now.... I am 16 years older then my husband..and I hope the samething does not happen like in 2009 when we filed our I-129F...Omg we did everything by the book and when he got to the Interview my husband had all our papers in order and in files and pics conversations and he answered every question with excellence but the Interviewer deciede and told my husband he did not see any love in this relationship cos of our age... so this is why my husband is not with me yet...I called and complained to the NVC specialist that handle these cases when they are sent back but in the report this is now what the man said he said we were denied cos of other reasons and he also told my husband he was just looking also for his visa...but you can not get eviednce cos you can not tape them so they get away with this and it is not fair me and my husband has been together since 2006 and I pray that when my husaband goes for his Interview this time we are blessed with a compassionate person who will see the truth and not deny us for the wrong reasons....Inshaallah....may God bless us

[marjus's girl 6]

Hey everyone I have seen what you guys are talking about and I know first hand how that feels......me and my husband got married last february and we are now almost done with the CR1 We await our Interview now.... I am 16 years older then my husband..and I hope the samething does not happen like in 2009 when we filed our I-129F...Omg we did everything by the book and when he got to the Interview my husband had all our papers in order and in files and pics conversations and he answered every question with excellence but the Interviewer deciede and told my husband he did not see any love in this relationship cos of our age... so this is why my husband is not with me yet...I called and complained to the NVC specialist that handle these cases when they are sent back but in the report this is now what the man said he said we were denied cos of other reasons and he also told my husband he was just looking also for his visa...but you can not get eviednce cos you can not tape them so they get away with this and it is not fair me and my husband has been together since 2006 and I pray that when my husaband goes for his Interview this time we are blessed with a compassionate person who will see the truth and not deny us for the wrong reasons....Inshaallah....may God bless us

good luck..santa cruz is talking about her husband who used her for four years and then dumped her after getting his 10 yr green card..but your right that is just plain age discrimination they did to u..but okay for guy to marry someone on 25yrs older...

[toma1 10]

good luck..santa cruz is talking about her husband who used her for four years and then dumped her after getting his 10 yr green card..but your right that is just plain age discrimination they did to u..but okay for guy to marry someone on 25yrs older...

It is not age discrimination if the DHS notices a history of problems in one type of relationship and not the other. If there are more problems with one type of relationship in a certain jurisdiction, it is going to be scrutinized more carefully and as Pushbrk said in this thread at the beginning--that IS their job. Sure, there is some research that shows that age gaps in relationships are not a higher risk factor for divorce, but the vast majority of the subjects in these studies are both from the same culture.

[marjus's girl 6]

It is not age discrimination if the DHS notices a history of problems in one type of relationship and not the other. If there are more problems with one type of relationship in a certain jurisdiction, it is going to be scrutinized more carefully and as Pushbrk said in this thread at the beginning--that IS their job. Sure, there is some research that shows that age gaps in relationships are not a higher risk factor for divorce, but the vast majority of the subjects in these studies are both from the same culture.

well one thing is for sure with internet and world travel the world is getting smaller and online relationships are on the rise so i think the whole way this process is looked at and done will change..im not older than my husband so i just was coming here because the whole"cougar thing"is growing and will have to be accepted soon..

[toma1 10]

well one thing is for sure with internet and world travel the world is getting smaller and online relationships are on the rise so i think the whole way this process is looked at and done will change..im not older than my husband so i just was coming here because the whole"cougar thing"is growing and will have to be accepted soon..

I don't think that USCIS doesn't accept them. I do think they look at where the beneficiary is coming from and the fraud statistics from that area of the world--and again, this is their job. I suspect that a "cougar relationship" coming from Canada or Italy is not going to raise as many flags as one from, say, Pakistan.

[marjus's girl 6]

I don't think that USCIS doesn't accept them. I do think they look at where the beneficiary is coming from and the fraud statistics from that area of the world--and again, this is their job. I suspect that a "cougar relationship" coming from Canada or Italy is not going to raise as many flags as one from, say, Pakistan.

yep agreed..

[toma1 10]

Sorry to hear this , but u can get a record for him when he says he played you and submit it to DOS and they will punish him

Like, just walk up with a mic and say, "Can I get this on tape?"

Edited June 6, 2011 by toma1

[h afifi 0]

Like, just walk up with a mic and say, "Can I get this on tape?"

[h afifi 0]

Like, just walk up with a mic and say, "Can I get this on tape?"

haha

you try to make fun >> nothing funny that was stupid

you better clean your Bu** before you talk

[toma1 10]

nothing funny that was stupid

Yeah... we agree then.

[Dumb/Dumber 61]

I get crucified everytime I tell my story on VJ and at my job and with my family, but here goes. I am 29 years older than my husband. We are so perfect for each other. There is no way this man is using me for an American Visa. He wanted me to stay with him in Turkey. He was so happy the day we went to get my Turkey Resident Card. I lived with his family for six weeks in Turkey. I decided to come home because I could not get anything done on the visa application from there. Post office was always closed for one holiday or another. I could see that he was getting his hopes up that I would just stay there forever. My father is the only one in my family that approves of the relationship. My bosses do not want to hear about the relationship again. My children make me feel like a criminal. But the worse thing of all is that we have been waiting for NOA2 since early November. No matter what happens we will be together, but I would love for him to come here.

If anyone wants to crucify me again, believe me I am already full of holes.

Edited June 6, 2011 by Dumb/Dumber