Baby Corner

[anxious 0]

Awwww how terribly cute!

I second and third Staashi's comments. My first was overdue, dont know why they let me go to 42.5 weeks, I was

young and left all the decisions up to good ole doc. So determined to have a natural birth, but lil did I know

my son was 8lb 13oz, hairy like a werewolf

16 hrs of labor for a section. I was thrilled he was healthy and thats the best feeling.

Oh yeah, I decided to go VBAC with my daughter, born ontime, and as painful as the labor was

the delivery/ postpartum period was a breeeeeeeezzzzeeee compared to that c-sect, and 8wks of pain.

So having done both, i prefer natural.

[Eveline 9]

So you're basically saying everybody just trying to birth naturally..no matter if first, second or thirdteenth time is just plain crazy and since complications may arise at any time of the pregnancy you should just go ahead a schedule a c/s? A benefit to that is an 'intact' hoohaa?

[chnst 6]

So you're basically saying everybody just trying to birth naturally..no matter if first, second or thirdteenth time is just plain crazy and since complications may arise at any time of the pregnancy you should just go ahead a schedule a c/s? A benefit to that is an 'intact' hoohaa?

haha, the "hoohaa" will go back to normal, vaginal or not. I don't know about octomoms hoohaa though.

well I think that a natural birth is preferrable, a c-section is major surgery but thank God that this has become a very controlled procedure, requiring minimal anesthesia and a fairly small cut. If there's an increased risk of mom or baby being in danger, I'd never think twice. Being in labor for so long and then ending up in the OR may be traumatizing but I guess like Staashi said, it doesn't matter in the end how your kid came into this world as long as he/she is healthy.

[tnh9479 1]

I really only had the gas issues for the first day or two. I guess I was lucky in that regard. It was the retention of water and swelling of my legs for up to two weeks afterwards that was horrible (and luckily I had a good friend who had a c-section who forewarned me of it). I only took one painkiller at night. After a day of up and down with the twins, at night I was a little sore. My OB asked me 3 times if I wanted more percoset than I left the hospital with. Hell to the no! I hate taking meds unless I have to and I have a pretty high tolerance to pain. To be honest, even with wound care for the resulting infection afterwards, the c-section was less painful to recover from than my gallbladder surgery (and I dealt with than pain with tylenol for a few days).

The duo were being...well...acting their age today. I was losing my patience. I had to have the husband come deal with them for a while (a true first). At least the babies and I got a good two hour nap today and everything was a little better.

[Eveline 9]

Well I've said it before and I'll say it again. I think my c/s was so horrible is because I went through that long labor, pushed for 5 hrs and then ended in the OR. What upsets me is that noone made me change positions to turn an OP baby the other way around so Adam's head could engage better. Standing up the day after was terrible with two people holding me up and my husband washing the blood off of me. I couldn't even sit up by myself. I called the nurse a few times a day just to hand me my child to change diapers or nurse etc (while my husband was at home taking care of stuff).

I guess a planned c/s is not as exhausting as long labor with a c/s but I'd do vaginal birth anytime.

[Staashi 371]

Well I've said it before and I'll say it again. I think my c/s was so horrible is because I went through that long labor, pushed for 5 hrs and then ended in the OR. What upsets me is that noone made me change positions to turn an OP baby the other way around so Adam's head could engage better. Standing up the day after was terrible with two people holding me up and my husband washing the blood off of me. I couldn't even sit up by myself. I called the nurse a few times a day just to hand me my child to change diapers or nurse etc (while my husband was at home taking care of stuff).

I guess a planned c/s is not as exhausting as long labor with a c/s but I'd do vaginal birth anytime.

No, Eve - you're not crazy nor is any woman, to want to have a natural delivery - sh!t, I wanted a natural delivery. I was in labor and delivery for 52 of the most fvcking torturous hours of my life with contractions no less just in agonizing pain all trying to deliver my son naturally. But did it work???? Oh hell no! As I said - if I would have known the agony I was going to be in when I got pregnant and how easily I recovered from my c-section I would have said sign me up.

Now, on to the matter of having an intact ####### at the end of it, yes, I was glad that I was not harmed down there. My sister had a second degree tear that she is only now able to resolve with surgery as she has decided against having any more children. For almost five years, she cannot sneeze or cough without losing urine because she was torn so badly when her son's quite broad shoulders ripped her a new one - literally! As a diabetic, my fear was that I know that I have had wound issues, and that if I tore or was cut and needed sutures that I would run a very, very high risk of having wounds that would take forever to heal or might not heal at all; and I would run the risk of infection for as long as they remained open. So, yes, I loved that my hoohaa was still intact - one less thing to worry about. Thank you, Jesus!

I think your issue is that sadly, with Adam's birth, you got the short end of the stick with your medical care. You had what appears to be the crappiest care I've heard about lately and I'm saddened for you that that was your experience. I, on the otherhand, had amazing care in L&D - they had birthing balls, whirlpool baths, and a few other gizmos - I just had a very stubborn cervix and a too small birth canal that E couldn't pass through. And my postpartum care was phenomenal - I had two of the sweetest postpartum nurses everyday that I was there - kept my pain managed quite well. I was changed regularly on my first day although I don't remember much about it as I was completely out of it from being awake for so long in L&D. Moreover, I was able to manuever around my room pretty well and into the shower with no problems. Enzo wasn't with me as he was in the NICU, so feeding and/or changing wasn't an issue for me as well.

With my c-section, I recovered so quick - I was off the pain meds as soon as I left the hospital and driving in less than 2 weeks. I know that c-sections aren't for everyone, but with my medical issues, I can't say enough good things about them.

[Anna C. 4]

I'm with Eveline on this one. The care she received is sadly not an uncommon occurrence. I also have yet to meet an obgyn who doesn't try to force me into procedures or c-sections (with Jona the ob mentioned several times we should schedule a section since I am so small, what an idiotic reason, so all size 2 women should have c-sections?!). I was fired over not wanting to be part of a medication trial and not wanting doppler readings during prenatal visits, totally valid and sane choices (the medication is really not good, not needed in my situation and my MD sister in pharmacological research was terrified anyone wanted to give that ####### to me for no reason). Good obgyns are out there, but let me tell you, they are frigging hard to come by, especially if you live out in the pampa like we do. I purposely chose a freestanding birth center, not because I want an 'award' or because I like labor pains, hell no, but because I want humane treatment in pregnancy and delivery, and capable treatment that is. The backup obgyn is excellent and one ob I personally trust. The things I have heard from friends and family, the reasons they were given c-sections or inductions were not valid, not medically nor scientifically backed at all. There are true reasons, like a previa or accreta, a truly stubborn cervix, 42 weeks plus gestation and so on. But so many healthy girls I know had to go through hard recoveries for no good reason and are now actively researching their choices for their second babies (e.g. in ICAN chapters).

As for the woohaa: I had two second degree tears and healed in less than 7 days. No problems whatsoever. Some women just get unlucky in bad tears, but that stuff happens. It is just as the bad luck that some c-section mamas have to catch nasty infections during healing time, permanent numbness at incision site and so on. All I know about the tearing: mine healed fine. My sisters both (for very valid reasons) had episiotomies and needed well over 4 weeks healing time.... As backed by science (pubmed is a great resource for women who like to learn more about procedures and how evidence based they really are), natural tears will heal more quickly.

It is not a bad thing to question a medical professional, and I clearly wouldn't be comfy with a doctor who tells me to shut up and not ask questions because he knows better. If there is no openess, then good-bye! Doctors are people too, and make mistakes, a lot. An open dialogue is important. It has happened 4 times now that the military doctors on base prescribed me medications that were not safe for pregnant nor nursing moms, situations I was in, and if I hadn't researched alternatives, I would have ended up harming my babies because of incapable doctors. So much for trust - control is better.

And I do know a handful of doctors, in my family and among my friends, and they are totally with me on the issue. Medicine is a huge field, and not an exact science, prone to error. Just 50 years ago every doctor knew that it is safe to take multiple x-rays during pregnancy... Medicine evolves. Critical thinking is always a great asset in any field of life.

Edited September 12, 2010 by Anna C.

[Mommy2ZaidnSalma 11]

I teared naturally AND had an episiotomy and my vag is completely fine

Im glad my doctors dont push csections. I pushed Zaid for almost 3 hours, with heart decels, and my BP was very elevated while in labor. But instead of rushing me in for a section they had me change positions very often and have oxygen to raise Zaids heart rate and ran labs to make sure my BP wasnt harming me, im very happy with how things went.

I was adament I wouldnt take a catheter until my epidural would work and because it never worked the nurse was soo accomadating and let me pee in a bed pan every 2 mins (pressure on your bladder without an epidural is CRAZY). She, im sure, was SO annoyed but I was never pressured to do anything.

Overall, I guess this shows everyone has different experiences. My hospital is in a lower class area (i go there by choice bc i LOVE my OB's) and isnt one of the nationally rated maternity wards, but, maybe I got lucky. If your OB's arent willing to do what YOU want, I wouldnt go there.

Lisa, Im glad you and baby are doing well. He is adorable and looks like a little man! Enjoy these first few weeks, they go by so fast!

2 days til my big ultrasound! Cant wait. As soon as the OB confirms its a girl we are gonna start working on the nursery. We decided on fuschia, light pink, and green polka dots on a white wall and the other walls light pink. I think it will be cute! Hopefully I dont change my mind again before then

[Eveline 9]

Now I agree that there are certain medical conditions when you should not wait and push a vaginal birth whatsoever. I'm sure Lisa and Stashi both made the best decision but for me it would not have been (but then again, I was never faced with diabetis in my pregnancy either so I guess it's easier said than done for me).

I guess it also depends on the severeness of the diabetis. My friend had three girls, all induced at 37 weeks due to diabetis. Her cervix seemed favorable. Then again my other friend, the one I had been writing about here, with the three miscarriages had some major diabetis. She wasn't allowed to eat simple carbs and starches from 8 weeks on and started insulin at around 27 or so weeks gestation because her insulin levesls were so off. Her babygirl was born naturally, the day before her due date with no induction.

As for tears and cuts. I got a cut with Allie (3rd degree from what my doula said) but never had any issues with it, just in the very beginning it was uncomfortable to sit.

[Fandango 1,440]

omG, I typed out a super long reply and now it's gone and I don't know where it went! *shakes fist*

I wanted to reply to everyone personally, but I'll try to keep this shorter for brevity's sake.

I know there's a hotbed of debate concerning c/s vs v/b, but speaking only for my case, I feel the best decision was made. Let's look at the facts: I was advanced maternal age, with Gestational diabetes, with an estimated fetal birthweight of up to 8 lbs 10 oz. Of course, that's not what he was, but that's what the last u/s predicted. I was 38.5 weeks pregnant, and again, the reason for the inducement was the GD and the risk that the insulin would make the placenta die, this causing instant death to the fetus.

The care I personally rec'd was awesome, and honestly, I cannot say enough about how great it all was. I do feel my doctor gave me more than enough of a chance to deliver vaginally, as of course that's the best option most times wrt risk of infection, recovery, etc. But after 34 (iirc) hours of induced labor, with contractions literally every minute to two minutes, it was a nightmare, and a LOT of stress on my body. Add to that, towards the end of the labor, I still was only 65% effaced or so, the stress of the labor was lowering the baby's heartbeat. Not terribly so, but enough to monitor it more closely, and to put me on o2.

The doc at that point put me on meds to stop the labor, which actually weren't working at first. Then he gave me the option....do I want to come back at the end of the week and try it all again? Of course, he couldn't guarantee that anything would be different then, or that prolonging the delivery wouldn't kill the placenta. After all, there was a reason for inducing early. Or do I want a Csection, which comes with its own host of risks, etc. I chose the C because I couldn't honestly see what the benefit would have been to wait and redo the litany of drugs to induce, painkillers, more labor, epi, etc ontop of the added risk with the GD.

And it's not like the doc didn't give me more than enough of a chance to come around for a VB. Had he just been all flippant and 'oh let's just do a C', I could understand the claim that docs don't give women chances, but in my case, my doc did...in fact, I would have liked the option perhaps 15 hours sooner, lol

I should have prefaced this by saying one of my friends who also was AMA with GD wound up going full term with another doc years ago. Baby wound up being 12.5 lbs. She went into labor naturally, and eventually wound up in a C when the stress of the labor proved to be so hard on the fetus, that he had a stroke in utero. The boy is now 5 and had some disability, I can't remember which one, but he walks with a brace and his arm is pretty much useless.

I did NOT want that happening to me and my baby.

3 mins after the spinal kicked in, my boy was out and healthy. Yes, having this incision sucks, but I was actually out of bed the same day (to go to the bathroom only, heh). They kept me in the hospital til Friday just to monitor me, which I think is awesome considering how insurance usually kicks you out within a few days. And while I feel a bit bloated and gassy (tmi, lol), I would take this over any of the alternatives I mentioned above.

The risks were too great to wait for a vaginal delivery. And I really can't understand what the true benefit would have been anyways.

I hope this post doesn't sound combative or defensive....just throwing in my $1.57 to the convo.

eta: so much for brevity;)

Edited September 12, 2010 by Happy Bunny

[chnst 6]

Kel: aww I really want a girl too now! I love the fuchsia and pink and green! I think I will get a referral for the 20 week sonogram tomorrow, so hopefully we will find out in just a few weeks.

as for the c/s vs VB debate. Most of the mommies here have very different but also very subjective experiences regarding the birth of their one or two own births or maybe their friends/sisters stories. That doesn't mean you can tell other moms that all OB's out there are horrible and want to push you into a c-section because it's more convenient to them or to refuse a c-section bec you feel it's not necessary.

I've had a pretty negative experience having Ben, but having worked in OB I know it's not like that everywhere. I sure learned my lesson, but there are some mommies here like Lisa or Staashi who really are better off with a c-section and I think its great that they were given all their options and even the chance to deliver vaginal.

Evi: I feel bad for you the way everything went with Adam, but do you really think that you would have had the strength to push Adam out after all these hours in labor with no progress even if they had eventually decided to have you walk and turn? I'm actually surprised that they would even let you go so far and push for 5 hours. Sometimes it's just not meant to be and even a previously healthy mom and healthy baby may get very deprived after all the stress of the prolonged labor, making a c-section the only and best way out (literally).

[tmma 467]

My son was 10lb 9oz and breach. I had pre eclampsia. I had a scheduled c-section because that's what the doctors said was the very best for myself and my son.

I DID find that after I had the c-section and was hanging out with other new moms in the hospital...I found myself constantly having to defend the c-section against a bunch of ladies that instantly seemed to look down their noses at me for not ' going natural' the truth was my pelvis was not big enough for him ( especially breach). I used to get upset at the number OF WOMEN who were either openly snide about it or sideways passive aggressive; it was upsetting at the time because it was almost like they wore their labor and episiotomy as a badge of honour. I thought that was strange. But no matter. A healthy baby and a healthy Mom is the goal, whichever way you go

I look at it this way. We all give birth to healthy babies. THAT'S the goal and THAT is the most natural thing...no?

Another curious thing I noticed was the only people to bring up ' intact hoo-haas' were the ladies who went natural. An intact hoo-haa was honestly not even a concern of mine.

[Eveline 9]

Evi: I feel bad for you the way everything went with Adam, but do you really think that you would have had the strength to push Adam out after all these hours in labor with no progress even if they had eventually decided to have you walk and turn? I'm actually surprised that they would even let you go so far and push for 5 hours. Sometimes it's just not meant to be and even a previously healthy mom and healthy baby may get very deprived after all the stress of the prolonged labor, making a c-section the only and best way out (literally).

No I don't think I would have had the strength. Actually I didn't have the strength and I'm surprised Adam actually tolerated labor so well. I think I'm more upset about me not questioning the doctors then and just letting it happen. Looking through my medical information I was induced for hypertension but at the last checkup - the one where they decided to induce - my blood pressure was at 138/80...not necessarily low but I wouldn't consider it preE, there where no other signs, no protein etc.

I'm sorry for getting so upset, I'm not saying that Lisa made a wrong decision or staashi for that matter. I don't even think I made a bad decision. It was everything that happened BEFORE that upsets me so much. The constant lying down. I got up for maybe TWO minutes, when I begged one of the nurses. That was on February 28, in the morning. Adam was born more than 16 hours after that and I was induced on the 27th at 6pm so I already had been lying down for about 12 hours. All I did was lay on my back. The whole c/s discussion hits home with me, maybe because I wish I could just brush it off like all the other moms and maybe because I wish I could say "I don't care how my baby was born, as long as baby is healthy". For me it needs a healthy mother to take care of a healthy baby. If mom ends up with depression or tries to figure out who to give the baby to cause she just doesn't want it right now then that's just not right in my opinion. I'm sorry for getting upset and maybe even stepping on other people's feet.

I really just bite my tongue sometimes because I don't want to be mean or question anybody's decision. I know three moms personally they all had a primary and repeat c/s without asking questions. One actually tried to talk me out of the VBAC. She had her c/s and was miserable. She said the second one was worse than the first one. THe other mom didn't have the option. Her OB wouldn't let her. SHe needed blood transfusion while in surgery and her incision got infected after the c/s and the third one had a baby with breathing issues cause they either got her due date wrong or baby just had the 'normal' side effects of a c/s. THAT's what upsets me too cause THEN people go like "Thank goodness the doc was there to save baby's life". Who knows all those incidents would not have happened in the first place. The last two moms were actually hoping for a spontaneous VBACs but with a surgery scheduled two weeks prior to the due date that hardly ever happens.

Not all doctors are bad. I made a bad experience, my friend had her baby in the same hospital, vaginally, she didn't have a thing to complain about. It's a personal experience.

I'm gonna bite my tongue a little harder from now on.

Congratulations again Lisa. I didn't mean to rain on your parade

[sara535 15]

well, I've done both C-section and vaginal delivery and I can say, being in labor for 55 hours and then having a huge baby pulled out with forceps was no picnic. I thought the recovery from both of them was difficult.

I've said this before and I'll say it again, its not that I am naive to the idea that some docs really do push unnecessary surgeries. however, until just a few decades ago, throughout history the number one far and away cause of death for women was complications in childbirth. Its just false to think nature knows best and all that 'you wont grow a baby thats too big for your body' etc. I know personally that a hundred years ago I would have died in childbirth with either or both of my kids. Sometimes medical intervention really is 100% called for, and I am grateful for it.

[sara535 15]

I'm sorry for getting so upset, I'm not saying that Lisa made a wrong decision or staashi for that matter. I don't even think I made a bad decision. It was everything that happened BEFORE that upsets me so much. The constant lying down. I got up for maybe TWO minutes, when I begged one of the nurses. That was on February 28, in the morning. Adam was born more than 16 hours after that and I was induced on the 27th at 6pm so I already had been lying down for about 12 hours. All I did was lay on my back. The whole c/s discussion hits home with me, maybe because I wish I could just brush it off like all the other moms and maybe because I wish I could say "I don't care how my baby was born, as long as baby is healthy". For me it needs a healthy mother to take care of a healthy baby. If mom ends up with depression or tries to figure out who to give the baby to cause she just doesn't want it right now then that's just not right in my opinion. I'm sorry for getting upset and maybe even stepping on other people's feet.

Eveline I dont think you are stepping on anyone's toes, we are all just sharing opinions and experiences in a very emotional subject. no mother is neutral about the birth of her child and if it makes you feel any better, when I delivered my son vaginally after 2 and a half days of labor, I had him at 1 pm and didnt even ask for him from the nursery until 11 pm. During the actual delivery I had two nurses leaning on my belly with their arms trying to push him from above, while I was throwing up off the side of the table. I BEGGED them for a C-section.

Needless to say, when it was over I felt like a truck ran over me. I couldnt sit without back spasms until he was 4 months old. So, yeah, I agree with what you are saying about a mom not feeling well, but it can happen under any circumstances. I used to cry when I heard my son crying because he was so big and my back hurt so bad sometimes I just dreaded picking him up (oh yeah, and I was a single mother from before the time he was born including during that awful labor).