A Little Humour for a Monday

[OBX 51]

I just received this in an email.

A little chuckle is always good for the soul.

CA NA DUH

Now that Vancouver is hosting the 2010 WinterOlympics, these are some questions people from all over the world are asking.

Believe it or not these questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website.

Obviously the answers are a joke; but the questions were really asked!

Q: I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow? ( England )

A. We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch them die.

Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? ( USA )

A: Depends on how much you've been drinking.

Q: I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto - can I follow the Railroad tracks? ( Sweden )

A: Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water.

Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada ? ( Sweden )

A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.

Q: Are there any ATM's (cash machines) in Canada ? Can you send me a list of them in Toronto , Vancouver , Edmonton and Halifax ? ( England )

A: No, but you'd better bring a few extra furs for trading purposes.

Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada ? ( USA )

A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe Ca-na-da is that big country to your North...oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary Come naked.

Q: Which direction is North in Canada ? ( USA )

A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada ? ( England )

A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA )

A: Aus-t ri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary , straight after the hippo races. Come naked.

Q: Do you have perfume in Canada ? ( Germany )

A: No, WE don't stink.

Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Where can I sell it in Canada ? ( USA )

A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

Q: Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female population is smaller than the male population? ( Italy )

A: Yes, gay nightclubs.

Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada ? ( USA )

A: Only at Thanksgiving.

Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round? ( Germany )

A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gathers. Milk is illegal.

Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada , but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. ( USA )

A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA )

A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first..

[sdw 10]

LMAO

[lilacvioletiris 11]

Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round? ( Germany )

A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gathers. Milk is illegal.

LOL ,LOL, LOL!

The olympics are in Vancouver, correct? Where do these people think you Canadians get food?

[Sam and Ben 2]

Good for a Monday laugh.

[Lona.C. 16]

LOL someone actualy asked me once if we realy live in igloos in canada ?

I said well mass is a little less cold then montreal,so can I call your home an igloo since its about the same temperature here ??

LOL

[Sam and Ben 2]

I remember once, many years ago, whilst playing WoW online, someone from the UK asked how it was possible for me to be online. It took a little bit before a dug out that they were trying to figure out where one would plug their computer into their igloo....

Edited January 25, 2010 by Sam and Ben

[Lona.C. 16]

I remember once, many years ago, whilst playing WoW online, someone from the UK asked how it was possible for me to be online. It took a little bit before a dug out that they were trying to figure out where one would plug their computer into their igloo....

LOL could have said we use naturel gas LOL

[Kimbear 53]

om my lord i have to send this to david.. ironically the igloo ones come up often LOL

[Rhiannercakes 14]

It's amazing how much we get made fun of, it's so amusing though.

[CDAgirlMI 51]

Most are funny. The ones from the USA are scary....

[Darnell 8,478]

Canada? Humour? Funny ? what ?

no no no no.

Canada is not a funny place - it says so - right there on the label.

FWIW, the PPL residing in Canada are Americans, yes? Perhaps to Call Them 'North Americans' is a better tag?

[shawna7 4]

BWAHAHAHA!!I swear I almost peed reading this!!

My daughter was asked at school if she used snow shoes to get to school in canada(shes a senior in highschool) she responded..**NO! of course not! I ride my moose to school!** hahaha I'm still laughing over those questions!

[Kathryn41 3,205]

One summer when I was a teenager in Kingston, Ontario we had an American car show up where we were at a summer theatre camp in a City Park. On top of the cars were skiis - snow skiis. The Americans wanted to know how much farther they had to drive to get to the ski hills. They honestly believed that we had snow all year round.