Being questioned at customs?

[Krikit 1,165]

Never lie to the officers. It will come back to haunt you. Here is a link which will be helpful to you, Carey:

Visitation FAQ's

[English Muffin 59]

OP, you haven't told us how often your boyfriend enters the US for 8-10 weeks at a time. Your boyfriend must spend more time out of the US than in it. If he has spent more time in the US than the UK recently it would be in his best interests to wait a while before trying to enter again.

[britbird 4]

I always said I was coming over to visit my college buddies (which indeed I was...I just happened to be in a romantic relationship with one of them).

Certain border agents are a little more "Team America" than others. I wouldn't worry about it.

[Carey 0]

Thank you for all the responses. We once got lucky and made enough money quickly, and booked a trip 3 weeks after the last one, and I specifically made a point of calling the customs dept. in Newark to ask if that would be alright. The person there told me it wouldn't be any problem, and that he didn't need any documents. However, he was asked a few questions that time but got through just fine. The last time, he didn't have ANY proof... not even the return itinerary, so I completely understand the agent questioning him... we just didn't know he needed any.

I don't want us to lie to the agents and not say that we're in a relationship. All of the documents listed on this site and everywhere else i can find don't apply to him - no employer, no lease/mortgage, we aren't yet engaged so no K1 papers, and we often get financial help from family so his bank statement wouldn't have what they consider enough funds for 10+weeks. He pays rent to his mom - should she write him a lease contract and have him sign it? Their agreement isn't written down, just by trust. He also gives her some money for the house bills each month. He pays other bills in his name - phone bill, credit cards, etc. Also, obviously from now on he will always have a return ticket to show as proof.

But in his situation, what can be proof of ties to UK? Bill statements, a written lease from his Mom, the return ticket? I just want to make the whole process a lot less stressful and time consuming next time, for both us as well as the border agent. And I want to be 100% positive that we are doing everything legally.

I am currently unemployed but looking for full-time work. I could always travel to the UK to visit him, but it would be difficult to find a very long break from work. All of the other times between trips have been about 2-3 months - is that too short of a time span?

He only just left the country yesterday (it got me thinking on the topic, and worried!) so when we get the funds to book, I think I will just contact the customs in Newark and explain his situation and ask what he should have as proof... or is that a bad idea?

[Gemmie 142]

The thing is, you can ring the customs agent all you like, they don't actually have any final say on the matter. The person that lets him in is the immigration officer at the border. They don't know anything about the call you made, and probably don't care. They just want to know why he's coming, how long for, and if he's a 'red flag'.

2-3 months between trips isn't long if you're talking weeks/months of visiting at a time. The one time I had problems was because I was returning to the US 2 months after I just left.. and I was there for just 4 weeks.

I know it's difficult for you to go and visit him, we were also in the same situation, with my husband looking for work and not wanting to risk an interview cropping up while he was away, or not wanting to take time off from a new job. But we decided that we couldn't have it all, and risked it. He happened to get an interview/job while he was in the UK, as his mum kept in contact to let him know about any responses. Maybe you can do that; put out some job applications and someone can let you know if you get any responses. You can always give them a call and explain that you're in the UK until X date, but would love to come in for an interview when you're back.

If it's really important for you to see each other soon, I would rethink the possibility of you coming to him. Yes, you might miss out on a job opportunity, but you could also miss out on him entering the border if he tries again after a few warnings.

[Carey 0]

The thing is, you can ring the customs agent all you like, they don't actually have any final say on the matter. The person that lets him in is the immigration officer at the border. They don't know anything about the call you made, and probably don't care. They just want to know why he's coming, how long for, and if he's a 'red flag'.

2-3 months between trips isn't long if you're talking weeks/months of visiting at a time. The one time I had problems was because I was returning to the US 2 months after I just left.. and I was there for just 4 weeks.

I know it's difficult for you to go and visit him, we were also in the same situation, with my husband looking for work and not wanting to risk an interview cropping up while he was away, or not wanting to take time off from a new job. But we decided that we couldn't have it all, and risked it. He happened to get an interview/job while he was in the UK, as his mum kept in contact to let him know about any responses. Maybe you can do that; put out some job applications and someone can let you know if you get any responses. You can always give them a call and explain that you're in the UK until X date, but would love to come in for an interview when you're back.

If it's really important for you to see each other soon, I would rethink the possibility of you coming to him. Yes, you might miss out on a job opportunity, but you could also miss out on him entering the border if he tries again after a few warnings.

Since he just left yesterday, it will be at least a few months before we gather the money to book up again, and I'm hoping that by then I am employed. I could ask my employer for time away ahead of time, but that isn't the greatest way to introduce yourself to a new boss and a new job - telling them you'll be away for weeks at a time. If not, I would love to visit and tell the employers when I would be back.

I just want to be sure that we are doing what needs to be done to show the agents that we are legitimate and not doing anything wrong. He has no intention of staying here longer than he is booked for, we just need to find out what papers he can provide in his situation of no employer, no lease, etc.

[Carey 0]

I've just had a think about the situation and a talk with my boyfriend, and I think the wisest decision here is for me to visit the UK next time, so that that gives him roughly a 6 month break from entering the US. I also have not been to the UK for six months. I will just have to tell my prospective employers that I will need a month away from the job at some point, so that they're aware of that ahead of time... and hope that that doesn't hinder my ability to get employment. And if I don't get employed in the next few months, then I'll still be able to keep applying, but just let them know when I can begin work.

Thanks so much for all the replies. Now, we just need to save up the money!

[Darnell 8,479]

He is just a one man operation, so the extent of his company paperwork is basically contracts, invoices, and payments from clients. He could also provide bill statements, his UK social security card, and other things. I just don't want to risk being turned away, the thought of it makes me feel sick.

If it becomes any issue - I do suggest he go to a chartered accountant, spend monies for 2 hours of the CA's time (no more, btw) and have an income statement prepared, then bring that along. Be mindful of 'the stamp' from the CA, as well.

Good Luck, however it turns out.

[visacat 1]

I can imagine it would be extremely upsetting to be turned away after all that money spent on the flight and then also have to arrange another flight home. I know I would be devastated not being able to see my fiance when a trip had been planned.

But as other posters have said as long as you have the evidence proving his ties back to the UK then his visits should be fine.

Edited January 21, 2010 by visacat

[Nik+Heather 121]

We're in the exact same situation - my hubby is also a self-employed web administrator who lives with mom (since it makes no sense to lease when you're in the U.S. for 6 months of the year). All he ever needed to show was his return itinerary/ticket.

However, we were advised to never say he was coming over to visit his girlfriend, because it raises red flags w/the border agents (a good friend of his went through hell for this). Also, now that we're going through the immigration process, we were told he shouldn't try to come over at all, because he would likely be turned away, depending on just how ####### the border agent is. He's been gone 4 months now - but I flew to England over Christmas to visit to make the wait less excruciating.

Nik visited me in the US 3 times before he came over on the K1, and he was here for 3 months on one of those visits. All visits he told them of the relationship. On the third visit, it was during the immigration process, AND he showed them the receipt notice. Many many many other VJ couples from VWP countries (and Canada - apparently they aren't VWP) have the same experience. He also got pulled into secondary more than once. It's a little nerve wracking, but I think easier to deal with when he was sort of expecting it.

I'm not sure where you're getting this advice, but misrepresentation at the port of entry isn't good. And you're needlessly making yourselves miserable by declining to visit each other when the vast majority of people get through POE just fine when they are in the immigration process. I guess by your signature you're going to ignore this anyway, but I hope others see that visiting is NOT a HUGE risk like some people make it out to be. Yes, it is good to be prepared with proof of ties, but even we can attest to that not even being strictly necessary. Nik came over basically unemployed, with his girlfriend standing not 25 feet away, and was admitted for 90 days. The OP has also demonstrated this.

[pracmac 0]

We're in the exact same situation - my hubby is also a self-employed web administrator who lives with mom (since it makes no sense to lease when you're in the U.S. for 6 months of the year). All he ever needed to show was his return itinerary/ticket.

However, we were advised to never say he was coming over to visit his girlfriend, because it raises red flags w/the border agents (a good friend of his went through hell for this). Also, now that we're going through the immigration process, we were told he shouldn't try to come over at all, because he would likely be turned away, depending on just how ####### the border agent is. He's been gone 4 months now - but I flew to England over Christmas to visit to make the wait less excruciating.

My husband got stopped at the border and returned to England until our paperwork is approved. That was on December 31, 2009. He had showed strong ties to the U.K we owned a house, he had a job etc.... They told us that despite the fact that we were following the rules on the tourist visa, they were not going to let him back in the country. I think it will depend on who the agents are that process him. (ours were clearly not happy to be working on New Years Eve)