Going back home to Ireland.. the North of anyway

[mawilson 2,133]

or maybe he wants to go home so he is closer to his family. not all people hate their family. some like spending time with them more than once a year.

It's possible, but family is a constant factor - if he wanted to be closer to them, why move to another country to begin with?

[Amby 490]

It's possible, but family is a constant factor - if he wanted to be closer to them, why move to another country to begin with?

maybe he didn't realise he would miss them until he was already gone

[Kathryn41 3,205]

Changing plans in view of changing circumstances isn't failure. It is recognizing that something isn't working the way it is now and making the changes necessary for it to work better. The one constant in life is change. Failure would be not to recognize when something is wrong and keep trying over and over and over to make something that isn't working, work without making the changes that are necessary for it to work.

Aidan, good luck with whatever choice you make. I'm glad you're taking your cat. I'm sure he'll adjust just fine.

Edited January 14, 2010 by Kathryn41

[LaL 418]

Many have failed... and returned home.

If returning home after the reason for immigrating ends is "failure", then probably the original intent behind immigrating wasn't for reunification with one's SO, but rather immigrating for one's personal benefit.

[chri'stina 190]

Aidan- You are not a loser for thinking about going back. Good luck with your decisions.

It's possible, but family is a constant factor - if he wanted to be closer to them, why move to another country to begin with?

Gee, I wonder why. Maybe love? Hmm just maybe.

[aidan80 9]

Thanks everyone. I don't see my going back or staying should I decide to stay as failure. A failure would be someone thats arrogant enough to assume they know enough about anyone they've never met then declare them a failure because x,y and z. Life isn't that black and white I only wish it was, if it was I'd stayed back home lol. Failure as stated would be to stay and try and push the round peg into the square hole if it don't fit it don't fit.

[Ali G. 37]

Are there any others on the board that have done this or thinking about heading home? This is still just a thought to me but feels more and more like the right one. I assume should I go through with this the process to surrender residency isn’t anywhere near as difficult as it was to get it lol .

Definitely heading back to Aus with my spouse in the next 12 months. Just returned from being over there this Christmas and we are keen on moving back.

[Ali G. 37]

Absolutely - it's the true hallmark of a loser!

Come on bud, different stokes for different folks. For example, you like NYC, whereas no money in the world could ever get me to move and live there, period.

[Ali G. 37]

Until you have actually lived somewhere, you will never know whether you like it or not. Personally, I earn a good salary here, actually more than what I earned in Aus. However, the US is just not for me. Therefore, I can either sit here and loathe (b###h) about my time here or I can move. I have chosen the latter.

Edited January 14, 2010 by Booyah

[mawilson 2,133]

If returning home after the reason for immigrating ends is "failure", then probably the original intent behind immigrating wasn't for reunification with one's SO, but rather immigrating for one's personal benefit.

One should always seek to maximize one's personal benefit; indeed, maximizing

one's personal benefit is the main reason most couples choose to live here and

not in the beneficiary's country. If the beneficiary's country offers more

opportunities, failure to recognize that fact *before* immigrating here is, well,

a failure.

[Malrothien 6]

Nothing wrong with going back home. I tried Canada out for 4 years - it doesn't work for me. With that, I'm returning home.

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

Life is full of failure.

[mawilson 2,133]

Life is full of failure.

Indeed. Accept it and move on. Acceptance is the first step to recovery.

[Ali G. 37]

One should always seek to maximize one's personal benefit; indeed, maximizing

one's personal benefit is the main reason most couples choose to live here and

not in the beneficiary's country. If the beneficiary's country offers more

opportunities, failure to recognize that fact *before* immigrating here is, well,

a failure.

Working abroad is something numerous professionals do all of the time. Some choose to stay, while most return to their home country. Every person I know who has worked in London for a few years has come back with well over 1 million pounds. So how are they are failure? Not only did they acquire valuable experience but they also pocketed a wad of cash. Aka win/win.

Edited January 14, 2010 by Booyah

[LaL 418]

One should always seek to maximize one's personal benefit; indeed, maximizing

one's personal benefit is the main reason most couples choose to live here and

not in the beneficiary's country. If the beneficiary's country offers more

opportunities, failure to recognize that fact *before* immigrating here is, well,

a failure.

The discussion is about after the relationship ends, not failure to recognize the benefits of immigrating to wherever the couple deems more robust.

Maintaining that if one deems returning to a home country after using a family category visa (marriage to a SO) as a failure, the perhaps the reuinification wasn't as important as the visa to immigrate.

Edited January 14, 2010 by LaL