divorcing US citizen

[Ema 0]

Hi,

I got married to a US citizen early 2008 after receiving a K1visa.

We have a baby born -preemie- 5months ago.

My husband has left the household 2 months ago stating he was going to a hotel.

He told me over the phone that he was filing for divorce citing inrreconciliable differences. I am alone in our flat in the US with my little baby boy & feeling acutely distraught. I have no family in the US. I do not work as my husband was providing for us. I cannot drive & feel extremely alone & isolated & helpless just caring for baby.

What can I do to go back home with baby? I am getting worn out here alone with baby. He wrote me an email to drive us to the airport the day after he left. I know he wants joint legal custody and not pay spousal support for me when I go back. He has been so inhuman I do not have any breastmilk for my baby and the harsh weather conditions where we live are starting to affect baby and me.

Can you please help? Who can help us? I just want to go home with my baby.

Thanks

[mrs. wife! 3]

Hi,

I got married to a US citizen early 2008 after receiving a K1visa.

We have a baby born -preemie- 5months ago.

My husband has left the household 2 months ago stating he was going to a hotel.

He told me over the phone that he was filing for divorce citing inrreconciliable differences. I am alone in our flat in the US with my little baby boy & feeling acutely distraught. I have no family in the US. I do not work as my husband was providing for us. I cannot drive & feel extremely alone & isolated & helpless just caring for baby.

What can I do to go back home with baby? I am getting worn out here alone with baby. He wrote me an email to drive us to the airport the day after he left. I know he wants joint legal custody and not pay spousal support for me when I go back. He has been so inhuman I do not have any breastmilk for my baby and the harsh weather conditions where we live are starting to affect baby and me.

Can you please help? Who can help us? I just want to go home with my baby.

Thanks

Hi Ema, so sorry to hear that. I can't help too much but the only thing that I know is that you can not leave the US with the baby, without your husband's permission. You have first to get divorced in the US and figure out the custody arrangements. Do not leave without his agreement otherwise he can sue you for kidnapping your own baby.

Hope someone here will be able to help you!!!

Just wanted to say I'm sorry for what you are going through.

[VanessaTony 3,567]

Firstly, do you have a green card? You haven't filled in your timeline so I don't know. If you DO have a greencard, he filled in paperwork saying he would support you and divorce does not end this obligation.

The issue with that though, is enforcing it, and I don't know how you would go about it. I think the best thing to do is seek legal advice. Do you have any family at all? Are they able to come and stay with you and help you out? As said above, you cannot leave with your child unless you have permission from his father.

Can you contact authorities in your area? Let them know the situation and that you need assistance. I don't know whether there's support for people in your situation (i.e. conditional permanent residents who have been abandoned by their significant others) but hopefully someone here can help you.

At the VERY least you should contact the police in your area or something to make sure you have food for yourself and your baby.

Good luck.

[MrsARBlake 0]

Hi,

I got married to a US citizen early 2008 after receiving a K1visa.

We have a baby born -preemie- 5months ago.

My husband has left the household 2 months ago stating he was going to a hotel.

He told me over the phone that he was filing for divorce citing inrreconciliable differences. I am alone in our flat in the US with my little baby boy & feeling acutely distraught. I have no family in the US. I do not work as my husband was providing for us. I cannot drive & feel extremely alone & isolated & helpless just caring for baby.

What can I do to go back home with baby? I am getting worn out here alone with baby. He wrote me an email to drive us to the airport the day after he left. I know he wants joint legal custody and not pay spousal support for me when I go back. He has been so inhuman I do not have any breastmilk for my baby and the harsh weather conditions where we live are starting to affect baby and me.

Can you please help? Who can help us? I just want to go home with my baby.

Thanks

I am so sorry for the pain that you have encountered at the hands of this VERY HUMANE person..Listen to what the other members have told you and maybe contact the immigration because he is liable for your care/baby(he is a diot)..Be strong and keep your head up my friend I am so sorry very sorry!!

[When2RNLove 6]

Hi,

I got married to a US citizen early 2008 after receiving a K1visa.

We have a baby born -preemie- 5months ago.

My husband has left the household 2 months ago stating he was going to a hotel.

He told me over the phone that he was filing for divorce citing inrreconciliable differences. I am alone in our flat in the US with my little baby boy & feeling acutely distraught. I have no family in the US. I do not work as my husband was providing for us. I cannot drive & feel extremely alone & isolated & helpless just caring for baby.

What can I do to go back home with baby? I am getting worn out here alone with baby. He wrote me an email to drive us to the airport the day after he left. I know he wants joint legal custody and not pay spousal support for me when I go back. He has been so inhuman I do not have any breastmilk for my baby and the harsh weather conditions where we live are starting to affect baby and me.

Can you please help? Who can help us? I just want to go home with my baby.

Thanks

Too, you must realize, your husband is on the hook as far as financial support as far as the USCIS is concerned. The Affidavit of Support that he signed, means just that, and divorce does not cancel the fact of that support.

[Ema 0]

Too, you must realize, your husband is on the hook as far as financial support as far as the USCIS is concerned. The Affidavit of Support that he signed, means just that, and divorce does not cancel the fact of that support.

WOW I think this situation is starting to get at me: I had tears reading the supportive replies, thanks for helping even with words.

(And to answer the question above, yes, I have a temporar green card since August 2008)

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

The affidavit of support can't be enforced by the beneficiary. It's a contract between the sponsor and the US government, basically guaranteeing that the beneficiary won't end up collecting means tested benefits from the government. It gives the government the right to sue the sponsor for reimbursement in the event the beneficiary ends up collecting those benefits. USCIS is powerless to force the sponsor to pay support to the beneficiary. They simply don't have that authority. A family court judge would have to issue that order. However, family courts HAVE used the affidavit of support as a basis for establishing support orders.

What many people fail to understand is that the affidavit of support was not meant to protect the beneficiary. It was meant to protect the government and the taxpayers against immigrants being supported by public funds.

Ema, get yourself a lawyer quick, and seek an emergency order of support from the family courts in your state. That should help with your immediate needs while you work on your marriage and immigration problems.

The US is a signatory to an international agreement on child abduction. To legally take your child from the US you will need the permission of the father. This is where things get a little muddy. If the child has a US passport, and is traveling with a parent, the US government will generally not do anything to stop the child from leaving the US. If the child doesn't have a passport yet, then either parent can ask the State Department to put the child's name on a watch list, and they will notify the parent if a passport application is submitted. However, they won't refuse to issue the passport unless a court order is in effect. Your husband can also ask the court to seize the child's passport to prevent you from attempting to leave the country with the child. What this all means is that, without intervention from a court, you can probably leave the US with your child. However, you may be guilty of kidnapping if you do so, and you could be arrested and prosecuted if you ever return to the US. If your home country is also a signatory to this agreement, then your husband could seek help from the courts in your country to take your child and have it returned to the US. This could get you in big trouble, and cost you a lot of money.

[payxibka 10,047]

The affidavit of support can't be enforced by the beneficiary. It's a contract between the sponsor and the US government, basically guaranteeing that the beneficiary won't end up collecting means tested benefits from the government. It gives the government the right to sue the sponsor for reimbursement in the event the beneficiary ends up collecting those benefits. USCIS is powerless to force the sponsor to pay support to the beneficiary. They simply don't have that authority. A family court judge would have to issue that order. However, family courts HAVE used the affidavit of support as a basis for establishing support orders.

What many people fail to understand is that the affidavit of support was not meant to protect the beneficiary. It was meant to protect the government and the taxpayers against immigrants being supported by public funds.

Ema, get yourself a lawyer quick, and seek an emergency order of support from the family courts in your state. That should help with your immediate needs while you work on your marriage and immigration problems.

The US is a signatory to an international agreement on child abduction. To legally take your child from the US you will need the permission of the father. This is where things get a little muddy. If the child has a US passport, and is traveling with a parent, the US government will generally not do anything to stop the child from leaving the US. If the child doesn't have a passport yet, then either parent can ask the State Department to put the child's name on a watch list, and they will notify the parent if a passport application is submitted. However, they won't refuse to issue the passport unless a court order is in effect. Your husband can also ask the court to seize the child's passport to prevent you from attempting to leave the country with the child. What this all means is that, without intervention from a court, you can probably leave the US with your child. However, you may be guilty of kidnapping if you do so, and you could be arrested and prosecuted if you ever return to the US. If your home country is also a signatory to this agreement, then your husband could seek help from the courts in your country to take your child and have it returned to the US. This could get you in big trouble, and cost you a lot of money.

For a child the age of the OP's, it will require BOTH parents to be present at the passport application agency when the application is made.

[VanessaTony 3,567]

The affidavit of support can't be enforced by the beneficiary. It's a contract between the sponsor and the US government, basically guaranteeing that the beneficiary won't end up collecting means tested benefits from the government. It gives the government the right to sue the sponsor for reimbursement in the event the beneficiary ends up collecting those benefits. USCIS is powerless to force the sponsor to pay support to the beneficiary. They simply don't have that authority. A family court judge would have to issue that order. However, family courts HAVE used the affidavit of support as a basis for establishing support orders.

What many people fail to understand is that the affidavit of support was not meant to protect the beneficiary. It was meant to protect the government and the taxpayers against immigrants being supported by public funds.

Ema, get yourself a lawyer quick, and seek an emergency order of support from the family courts in your state. That should help with your immediate needs while you work on your marriage and immigration problems.

Sorry but WRONG! You obviously didn't read the paperwork. It CLEARLY states that the beneficiary CAN SUE the person who filled in the form.

From the I-864 form, page 18:

"What If I Do Not Fulfill My Obligations?

If you do not provide sufficient support to the person who becomes a permanent resident based on the Form I-864 that you signed, that person may sue you for this support."

If a Federal, State or local agency, or a private agency provides any covered means-tested public benefit to the person who becomes a permanent resident based on the Form I-864 that you signed, the agency may ask you to reimburse them for the amount of the benefits they provided. If you do not make the reimbursement, the agency may sue you for the amount that the agency believes you owe.

If you are sued, and the court enters a judgment against you, the person or agency that sued you may use any legally permitted procedures for enforcing or collecting the judgment. You may also be required to pay the costs of collection,including attorney fees."

------------

Though in your situation (and most others) you don't have the MONEY to sue so I would follow the support of the US government route. ALWAYS keep anything he sends you (email/mail/text msgs) so that you have proof of his behaviour. Keep records of any money he has given you, or any money you spend on yourself and the baby as he is supposed to be helping you.

Edited January 4, 2010 by Vanessa&Tony

[Old Dominion 26]

The Catholic Charities nearest you can provide the help you need - legal and other.

[Bobby+Umit 161]

The Catholic Charities nearest you can provide the help you need - legal and other.

And contact your embassy for assistance.

[Bobby+Umit 161]

Sorry but WRONG! You obviously didn't read the paperwork. It CLEARLY states that the beneficiary CAN SUE the person who filled in the form.

From the I-864 form, page 18:

"What If I Do Not Fulfill My Obligations?

If you do not provide sufficient support to the person who becomes a permanent resident based on the Form I-864 that you signed, that person may sue you for this support."

If a Federal, State or local agency, or a private agency provides any covered means-tested public benefit to the person who becomes a permanent resident based on the Form I-864 that you signed, the agency may ask you to reimburse them for the amount of the benefits they provided. If you do not make the reimbursement, the agency may sue you for the amount that the agency believes you owe.

If you are sued, and the court enters a judgment against you, the person or agency that sued you may use any legally permitted procedures for enforcing or collecting the judgment. You may also be required to pay the costs of collection,including attorney fees."

------------

Though in your situation (and most others) you don't have the MONEY to sue so I would follow the support of the US government route. ALWAYS keep anything he sends you (email/mail/text msgs) so that you have proof of his behaviour. Keep records of any money he has given you, or any money you spend on yourself and the baby as he is supposed to be helping you.

The way I read that says the "agency" providing benefits may sue you (sponsor), not the beneficiary.

So Jim is correct IMO.

(Jim is also correct - there are a few cases where the benificiary managed to get money off the sponsor, using the 864, in divorce court)

[Jasman0717 9]

Seek legal assistance. Most cities have a legal aid soceity, see if you can find one. Your husband is still obligated to take care of you. Don't let your baby suffer. You can initially seek assistance through social services. They aren't going to let your baby go without subsistance.

[rin and john 71]

The way I read that says the "agency" providing benefits may sue you (sponsor), not the beneficiary.

So Jim is correct IMO.

(Jim is also correct - there are a few cases where the benificiary managed to get money off the sponsor, using the 864, in divorce court)

Thought that too, but it doesn't read that way to me in the I-864 instructions. Also saw this on a quick web search (more and more case law where aliens are being awarded support based on the I-864 contract):

http://www.ricefamilylaw.com/articles/inte...gration-law.htm

[payxibka 10,047]

Thought that too, but it doesn't read that way to me in the I-864 instructions. Also saw this on a quick web search (more and more case law where aliens are being awarded support based on the I-864 contract):

http://www.ricefamilylaw.com/articles/inte...gration-law.htm

Cheshire v Cheshire (FL) and Stump v Stump (IN) are two commonly cited cased from about 4 or so years ago.... It would be nice to see if there are more recent cases upholding this or maybe the courts have finally seen the errors of these decisions...