Question to foreign spouses who've arrived here (USA)

[one...two...tree 2,762]

Were there any big suprises, disappointments once you arrived and settled in?

Do you have any tips or suggestions to the USC to help the foreign spouse adjust to the big change?

[*Robert* 2]

[one...two...tree 2,762]

hahaha...Thanks, Robert! Am I worrying too much?

[*Robert* 2]

hahaha...Thanks, Robert! Am I worrying too much?

Good answer Steven!

There is absolutely nothing you can do about where you live, except move! It is different for each person who comes here, as to how they will react when they see where you live. All you can do is be supportive and do everything you can to help with the adjustment.

[flipicaneze 20]

Were there any big suprises, disappointments once you arrived and settled in?

Do you have any tips or suggestions to the USC to help the foreign spouse adjust to the big change?

Dissapointments:

1. All the Louis Vitton and Coach purses she has from the Philippines are used mostly by those in the ghetto.

2. She now has nightmares of very large women coming to eat her!!

3. Being at home alone without work has made her nuts!! (USCIS please quicken the Authorization for employment!!)

4. Since she has no idea what the US Dollar is worth, its like water. (Of course when I got a bunch of Philippine Pesos for the first time, it felt like Disney money to me too!)

5. Cellular phones are not free to use when using a long distance phone card nor is incoming calls (Go figure Cingular)

6. Malls are so much smaller here in Chicago area.

7. She got a flu during the hot part of Summer!!

Anybody else got anything?

[*Robert* 2]

Were there any big suprises, disappointments once you arrived and settled in?

Do you have any tips or suggestions to the USC to help the foreign spouse adjust to the big change?

Dissapointments:

1. All the Louis Vitton and Coach purses she has from the Philippines are used mostly by those in the ghetto.

2. She now has nightmares of very large women coming to eat her!!

3. Being at home alone without work has made her nuts!! (USCIS please quicken the Authorization for employment!!)

4. Since she has no idea what the US Dollar is worth, its like water. (Of course when I got a bunch of Philippine Pesos for the first time, it felt like Disney money to me too!)

5. Cellular phones are not free to use when using a long distance phone card nor is incoming calls (Go figure Cingular)

6. Malls are so much smaller here in Chicago area.

7. She got a flu during the hot part of Summer!!

Anybody else got anything?

LMAO :lol:

I think that is a good start for sure!!! Especially about the malls!!!

[Reba 2]

try to make sure there's stuff to do, people to visit with etc.

When I first got here, my husband was working 80 hour weeks and never got to spend any time with me, and of course with a work load like that, he has no friends to introduce me to except people he worked with. Sitting at home alone with nothing to do, nowhere to go and no one to talk to really put a strain on our relationship.

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

My wife was disappointed by how messy I kept the house... even after cleaning it. She was also disappointed by how far everything was from home. She was happy about the fact that Indian food and groceries are only a short drive away.

[Cassie 8]

My humble advice is to be patient. It's only within the last couple of months that I have felt truly settled here, and the hubster dearest helped alot by just listening to me vent and supporting me when I felt sad.

I also agree with what Reba said. Jerry was able to show me around places and introduce me to people, which helped a lot to getting used to the area.

[Joey559 1]

Well, I don't know about specific disappoints, but I do know what coping with homesickness is like. And when it happens the very best thing you can do is let it happen. Let her/him cry all over you. Let her/him get angry, let it roll off your back if he/she gets snippy about how the paper boy chucks the newspaper at a certain angle that smacks the house funny. Just let them deal with the emotions however they have to. I was sad about every six weeks or so when I was staying with Craddy in the UK. It only lasted about a day but I was weepy for no reason. He was wonderful, he just let me have a cry and left me alone to talk to my mom on the phone and he could not have been more supportive. I can only hope to be just as supportive for him.

I guess it depends on the individual and where you live and the opportunities it offers them, but I would say don't let anyone make any decisions about going home in the first year. It does get better.

Good luck and congrats!

Joey

[incanada1234 0]

Yep, patience is key. When I moved to Canada I couldn't work for 7 months while waiting for my social insurance number. By about month 4 or 5 I thought I was going to tear my hair out from sitting home all day while hubby worked. By month 7/8ish I had a job and we had made friends that we were hanging out with a lot, so I was MUCH happier.