marriage troubles

[scarry 0]

my filipina wife is not happy here in the usa she is critical of everything around her my friends my family dont get me wrong we do love each other and she is a good wife in the sense of her duties at home of cooking cleaning etc. but nothing seems to make her happy more than a week at a time we live in a small town no other filipinas close to us for her to have as a friend but so many woman here have tryed to makes friends with her she is not interested at all makes no attempt to be social at all an is jealouse of everyone that is close to me including my mom and my daughter so i decided to send my wife back to philippines for a visit for us to take a break from this marriage we have been married 5 months i miss her very very much but last nite even tho we are still so far away from each other when we are chatting she gets the bad attitude with me again i cant take it anymore its not worth it im done i guess my question is now that she is in philippines how do we o about getting a divorce .

[Scott and Mhay 57]

Sorry to hear the problems you are having. You will just have to file for the divorce and have her served with the papers. You will have to look up the exact requirements for your state. Have you tried any counselling? Do you think she will ever change her ways or even try? It sure is tough because of the journey that you had to take to get this far. Definately talk to her about it though. You may want to a Divorce lawyer just to find out your options.

[chinese_mutt 11]

She might be depressed, get counseling.

It is not as simple as a bad attitude. Maybe it's the snow and the gloomy atmosphere.

I know this coz it gets me half the time too.

Try counseling first of take a trip with her somewhere more sunny or maybe like a city.

Recapture what you guys used to have.

[Loolie 56]

my filipina wife is not happy here in the usa she is critical of everything around her my friends my family dont get me wrong we do love each other and she is a good wife in the sense of her duties at home of cooking cleaning etc. but nothing seems to make her happy more than a week at a time we live in a small town no other filipinas close to us for her to have as a friend but so many woman here have tryed to makes friends with her she is not interested at all makes no attempt to be social at all an is jealouse of everyone that is close to me including my mom and my daughter so i decided to send my wife back to philippines for a visit for us to take a break from this marriage we have been married 5 months i miss her very very much but last nite even tho we are still so far away from each other when we are chatting she gets the bad attitude with me again i cant take it anymore its not worth it im done i guess my question is now that she is in philippines how do we o about getting a divorce .

i guess 5 months of being married is not that long...you are still in adjustment period of your marriage...i bet there is a way you can both figure out to make your marriage work...divorce shouldnt be the immediate solution for it.

[scarry 0]

Sorry to hear the problems you are having. You will just have to file for the divorce and have her served with the papers. You will have to look up the exact requirements for your state. Have you tried any counselling? Do you think she will ever change her ways or even try? It sure is tough because of the journey that you had to take to get this far. Definately talk to her about it though. You may want to a Divorce lawyer just to find out your options.

i have taken her to pittsburgh into the strip district a couple of times to get her dried fish an other philippine food but it doesnt impress her much i i thought she would be fine here in usa i knew she would miss her family but she worked in tiwian for 6 yrs with out going home so thought she may be able to handle this transition well she i 33 yrs old not a 20 somthing

[scarry 0]

my filipina wife is not happy here in the usa she is critical of everything around her my friends my family dont get me wrong we do love each other and she is a good wife in the sense of her duties at home of cooking cleaning etc. but nothing seems to make her happy more than a week at a time we live in a small town no other filipinas close to us for her to have as a friend but so many woman here have tryed to makes friends with her she is not interested at all makes no attempt to be social at all an is jealouse of everyone that is close to me including my mom and my daughter so i decided to send my wife back to philippines for a visit for us to take a break from this marriage we have been married 5 months i miss her very very much but last nite even tho we are still so far away from each other when we are chatting she gets the bad attitude with me again i cant take it anymore its not worth it im done i guess my question is now that she is in philippines how do we o about getting a divorce .

i guess 5 months of being married is not that long...you are still in adjustment period of your marriage...i bet there is a way you can both figure out to make your marriage work...divorce shouldnt be the immediate solution for it.

believe me i dont want to get a divorce either like i say i love my wife but i can not afford her moods financially or mentally i work hard for my money like all of us do and this process has been very expensive draining my savings to none and is it normal for her family there asking for money every month seems like it somthing all the time

[ThreeC 0]

give yourselves a chance to know each other more....5 months is quite short time to make a drastic decision like that more so if you said you love each other.

good lick to you and keep us posted.

[Dakine 26]

Do you have a way she can easily communicate back home. I bought my wifes family a laptop and set them up with DSL. Helps a LOT.

[Lingladyinred19 13]

my filipina wife is not happy here in the usa she is critical of everything around her my friends my family dont get me wrong we do love each other and she is a good wife in the sense of her duties at home of cooking cleaning etc. but nothing seems to make her happy more than a week at a time we live in a small town no other filipinas close to us for her to have as a friend but so many woman here have tryed to makes friends with her she is not interested at all makes no attempt to be social at all an is jealouse of everyone that is close to me including my mom and my daughter so i decided to send my wife back to philippines for a visit for us to take a break from this marriage we have been married 5 months i miss her very very much but last nite even tho we are still so far away from each other when we are chatting she gets the bad attitude with me again i cant take it anymore its not worth it im done i guess my question is now that she is in philippines how do we o about getting a divorce .

5 months?? wow.. its not enough.. if u don't mind how old are u and ur wife??

so now she in the philippines?? hope everything went well to u both..

Divorce is not a solutions..

god bless u

[Scott and Mhay 57]

my filipina wife is not happy here in the usa she is critical of everything around her my friends my family dont get me wrong we do love each other and she is a good wife in the sense of her duties at home of cooking cleaning etc. but nothing seems to make her happy more than a week at a time we live in a small town no other filipinas close to us for her to have as a friend but so many woman here have tryed to makes friends with her she is not interested at all makes no attempt to be social at all an is jealouse of everyone that is close to me including my mom and my daughter so i decided to send my wife back to philippines for a visit for us to take a break from this marriage we have been married 5 months i miss her very very much but last nite even tho we are still so far away from each other when we are chatting she gets the bad attitude with me again i cant take it anymore its not worth it im done i guess my question is now that she is in philippines how do we o about getting a divorce .

i guess 5 months of being married is not that long...you are still in adjustment period of your marriage...i bet there is a way you can both figure out to make your marriage work...divorce shouldnt be the immediate solution for it.

believe me i dont want to get a divorce either like i say i love my wife but i can not afford her moods financially or mentally i work hard for my money like all of us do and this process has been very expensive draining my savings to none and is it normal for her family there asking for money every month seems like it somthing all the time

Yes it is normal for her family to always depend on her. She worked in taiwan for 6 years right? I bet she was sending most of her earnings back to the philippines. You need to set limits and have to know what is an emergency or not. You dont need to send money all the time, but maybe from time to time. This is where you need to let her work and do what she wants with some of her money. (of course you need to apply for EAD right?)

You need to try and make it work...dont give up so easy.

[scarry 0]

give yourselves a chance to know each other more....5 months is quite short time to make a drastic decision like that more so if you said you love each other.

good lick to you and keep us posted.

yes they can see and chat to each other everyday and they do

[Loolie 56]

give yourselves a chance to know each other more....5 months is quite short time to make a drastic decision like that more so if you said you love each other.

good lick to you and keep us posted.

yes they can see and chat to each other everyday and they do

i guess her problem is money and everything just follow leading her to act like that...

[scarry 0]

my filipina wife is not happy here in the usa she is critical of everything around her my friends my family dont get me wrong we do love each other and she is a good wife in the sense of her duties at home of cooking cleaning etc. but nothing seems to make her happy more than a week at a time we live in a small town no other filipinas close to us for her to have as a friend but so many woman here have tryed to makes friends with her she is not interested at all makes no attempt to be social at all an is jealouse of everyone that is close to me including my mom and my daughter so i decided to send my wife back to philippines for a visit for us to take a break from this marriage we have been married 5 months i miss her very very much but last nite even tho we are still so far away from each other when we are chatting she gets the bad attitude with me again i cant take it anymore its not worth it im done i guess my question is now that she is in philippines how do we o about getting a divorce .

5 months?? wow.. its not enough.. if u don't mind how old are u and ur wife??

so now she in the philippines?? hope everything went well to u both..

Divorce is not a solutions..

god bless u

iam 43 she is 33 yes she is in philippines right now

[maset09 0]

my filipina wife is not happy here in the usa she is critical of everything around her my friends my family dont get me wrong we do love each other and she is a good wife in the sense of her duties at home of cooking cleaning etc. but nothing seems to make her happy more than a week at a time we live in a small town no other filipinas close to us for her to have as a friend but so many woman here have tryed to makes friends with her she is not interested at all makes no attempt to be social at all an is jealouse of everyone that is close to me including my mom and my daughter so i decided to send my wife back to philippines for a visit for us to take a break from this marriage we have been married 5 months i miss her very very much but last nite even tho we are still so far away from each other when we are chatting she gets the bad attitude with me again i cant take it anymore its not worth it im done i guess my question is now that she is in philippines how do we o about getting a divorce .

i guess 5 months of being married is not that long...you are still in adjustment period of your marriage...i bet there is a way you can both figure out to make your marriage work...divorce shouldnt be the immediate solution for it.

[van2006 0]

A job can make all the difference in the world. When she comes back, tell her to get one. It will keep her busy, get her some friends, and allow her to make some extra money to send to her family. Not having a job and just staying at home can drive anyone mental. When I arrived here, my husband and I lived in a small town too. I had no friends too, no job (I only got my EAD five months after my wedding), no high-speed internet to get in touch with my family, no money except for the $5k savings I brought fr the Philippines (which wasn't much). No drivers license. Nothing to see except trees and trees and more trees. I was bored and depressed (at that time I denied that I was). I had thrown tantrums that my husband claimed he's never seen before. I had threatened to leave probably more than a couple of times. I was extremely critical of the surroundings (boring and quiet), the "country", the people, the cows, the grass, the culture, etc. I hated the get togethers and I was extremely suspicious of the people around me (e.g."They don't like me and are just pretending to like me"). Money was tight too. We were living paycheck to paycheck.

Anyway. We've been married almost four yrs and we're happy. The first year was tough but I found a job as soon as I could. We moved to the city. Every time I got a raise, we'd move to a better place. Now we own a house and we don't have any other debt. My husband had bad credit so I had to work on mine alone to the point now where I'm improving his credit too! I still don't have filipino friends here which tbh is ok. I have friends at work and my closest friends are still back home. I keep in touch with them daily. Here I hang out with my in laws and my husband 100 per cent of the time.

I think the biggest help was me getting a job. When my husband and I fought, prayers helped. When things were tough, the commitment really helped---through thick and thin

And of course, there's love. Love kept me here. And love kept my husband fr throwing me out when I threw the worst tantrums ever !

Her sending money home will continue to be an issue until she gets a job (that's my guess). We don't have that problem since I don't send money home unless there's an occasion. And we always try to make it fair (e.g. If we give his mom a 100 dollar gift on her bday, we'd give the same amt to my mom).

Good luck. I hope you and your wife make it. The first year is always tough. You're not alone.