Anyone's parent/s hate their fiance/e?

[Jenn! 918]

Disliking your choice in a life partner is one thing, but being flat out rude to them is another. It's amazing how some parents can't even bring themselves to be courteous. I hope it gets better for you all over time.

[UmmSqueakster 54]

Disliking your choice in a life partner is one thing, but being flat out rude to them is another. It's amazing how some parents can't even bring themselves to be courteous. I hope it gets better for you all over time.

One would think that a sense of decency would win out, but alas, it is not always the case.

My mother won't even accept a family picture of the husband and myself. She invited *me* to San Francisco for vacation over christmas, but when I refused because she didn't invite the husband, she was like, oh, um yeah, no. And, the husband refuses to have anything to do with them. It all goes back to nasty disagreements that manifested when they visited him in Egypt and were increadibly rude to him, and he in turn wasn't all to polite in the face of their ugly american act. They weren't happy that I was marrying someone I met online, and thought he was a dreamer who would never amount to anything. He gave them a few more chances after that, but they snubbed him, so he gave up. Now he won't even talk to them. *sigh*

I'm just hoping that the family history will win out on this, that when kids come along things get a bit better. You would think my parents would realize that our family tree is full of parents not liking and snubbing their children's spouses, including my dad's parents loathing my mom. But, apparently that experience wasn't enough to stop her from doing the same to us.

[zaytoona 8]

Awww, thanks for everyone's replies. I feel for those in the same position. My mom would probably commit a felony to stop our wedding. I agree with Jenn. My mom does not have to like my fiance but at least respect him and don't be rude! When we get married I think things will get slightly better although that is wishful thinking. My mom is pretty tough.

Maybe you're right...when we have kids? Maybe? Little Moroccan grandchildren? Haha, I could visualize my mom's disgusted face now!

[And_Sam 44]

Awww, thanks for everyone's replies. I feel for those in the same position. My mom would probably commit a felony to stop our wedding. I agree with Jenn. My mom does not have to like my fiance but at least respect him and don't be rude! When we get married I think things will get slightly better although that is wishful thinking. My mom is pretty tough.

Maybe you're right...when we have kids? Maybe? Little Moroccan grandchildren? Haha, I could visualize my mom's disgusted face now!

I'm sure that my mom would have done the same thing...heh heh so I didn't tell her that I was getting married when I went over! She wouldn't talk to me for about 2 weeks, then finally I sent her a text and that opened the door up for her to start talking to me. Of course I had to listen to how "horrible" I was for doing this, and "who in their right mind" would do something "this" foolish. I let her rant for about 30 minutes then told her ok, you have said what you feel, now I don't want to hear this from you again. Once my husband comes over here, if she cannot treat my husband like how she treats my siblings spouses, then we just won't come around.

[chaishai 1]

Awww, thanks for everyone's replies. I feel for those in the same position. My mom would probably commit a felony to stop our wedding. I agree with Jenn. My mom does not have to like my fiance but at least respect him and don't be rude! When we get married I think things will get slightly better although that is wishful thinking. My mom is pretty tough.

Maybe you're right...when we have kids? Maybe? Little Moroccan grandchildren? Haha, I could visualize my mom's disgusted face now!

How could your mom be disgusted by her grandchildren. That wont happen. My mom and I have different tastes in what we find attractive, but she thinks her little moroccan/tunisian/american grandkids are adorable.

[zaytoona 8]

How could your mom be disgusted by her grandchildren. That wont happen. My mom and I have different tastes in what we find attractive, but she thinks her little moroccan/tunisian/american grandkids are adorable.

Oh, you do not know my mom. It's not about attractiveness, she just doesn't want me to be with a Moroccan or have anything to do with one, romantically. If the extent of our relationship was just a friendship then she would be all for it. In other words, not for her daughter but gladly someone else's.

[Y's_habibitk 2]

Oh, you do not know my mom. It's not about attractiveness, she just doesn't want me to be with a Moroccan or have anything to do with one, romantically. If the extent of our relationship was just a friendship then she would be all for it. In other words, not for her daughter but gladly someone else's.

do you know exactly what her concerns are so you can try to address them with her? Or is she just straight up not into you marrying anyone other than the guy next door?

I would try to have a calm intelligent convo with her and ask exactly what her issues are with it... if its something that you can ease her about, maybe that will help. If she is worried about you being used for a GC, there's nothing to ease her mind about that other than him staying around afterwards.

[Westindy 0]

Yes my mom also is has issues with me marrying a man from another country. My dad is all for it, and can't wait to meet my fiance. I think my mom will come around when he get's here.

[zaytoona 8]

I have tried sitting down with her with all hostility aside and nothing seems to work. For now, I will continue to keep my mouth closed until I say "Mom, guess what! Omar is here and we're getting married next month! Will you attend the wedding?"

There is just no other way. She already knows how I feel about him.