Im in shock and I dont know what to do

[Veemer 0]

here goes,

My Fiancee fessed up to me on the phone just earlier, she comes from a poor family for Hilongos Leyte, she left and went to Manila to find a job, when I met her she was working at a waterstation. Now here is the kicker, she said its been on her mind for a very long time and wanted to tell me this so she can clear her conscience. During our conversation out of the blue she told me that she needed to tell me something, she said she used to work at a BEER HOUSE and would have sex with men for money, she claims she only went out 3 times till she no longer can take it as she was starting to lose respect for herself. Should I be affected by this ? should I lose sleep over this ? right now I am in a world of confusion and so much thoughts are racing thru my mind.

WHAT DO I DO ?

WHAT would you guys do ?

ADVISE ME PLEASE ?

Edited December 6, 2009 by Veemer

[miamortueres 0]

I do understand what you feel right now..... but to think your fiance got the nerves to tell you the truth is impressive. Well, if you really love her you won't get affected. Atleast she tells you the truth when she can keep it to herself without you knowing it. It is better that now you know than knowing it when you guys are already married. Whatever her past is, should not affect you IF you really love her. Poverty pushed her to do things that she dont want to and it is good that she escaped from that wrong doing.

[DARUMA07 25]

This could be grounds for them refusing to give her a visa. If I remember right, there was something about Moral Turpitude and Prositution was one reason they could deny her a visa. Correct me if I am wrong! We all have a past and we all have done something in our lives that we have regretted. I respect her for her honesty and I hope you both can get through this. Good Luck to you!

[desperatefiance 0]

Are you shocked because she told you she worked in bar? And went to f*** men for money? ASked yourself, do you want to consider yourself as her customer? WOuld you go and fight for your love to her or rather ignore and take a risk to find another girl who could be bithcer than her? DO you want to spend time to give her chance to prove to you that she loves you and what she trully feel is what you are looking for..love?

or in short, do you love her?

[tallcoolone 102]

I have heard the Bar Girls can and do make great wives.

If it were me, I would cut ties.

Way way too many girls in the Philippines.

[desperatefiance 0]

What are you looking for anyway?

[Veemer 0]

What are you looking for anyway?

I'm looking for her love, i've felt the love from her its just that I never would have thought of her as a person that would do that. Ive already invested alot of time on here, been there 3 times, which were probably the best times of my love. I am just confused at the moment.

[desperatefiance 0]

if it is for love then go for it.

[Jadsdad02 0]

here goes,

My Fiancee fessed up to me on the phone just earlier, she comes from a poor family for Hilongos Leyte, she left and went to Manila to find a job, when I met her she was working at a waterstation. Now here is the kicker, she said its been on her mind for a very long time and wanted to tell me this so she can clear her conscience. During our conversation out of the blue she told me that she needed to tell me something, she said she used to work at a BEER HOUSE and would have sex with men for money, she claims she only went out 3 times till she no longer can take it as she was starting to lose respect for herself. Should I be affected by this ? should I lose sleep over this ? right now I am in a world of confusion and so much thoughts are racing thru my mind.

WHAT DO I DO ?

WHAT would you guys do ?

ADVISE ME PLEASE ?

hello veemer, how long you know your fiancee? did u visit her already? did you meet her family in leyte? did you support her financially? if you support her and she still doing her wrong doing, its not really good for you to pursue to get her and bring her in the usa, sometimes poverty is not the main reason, but it depends on the person itself, my advice is follow what is in your mind and heart, if you still love her give her a second chance, but if you have doubts leave her...tell her right away...to find her way...and you have time to move on....

[Westindy 0]

All of us have made mistakes in the past. There is no perfect person and this woman was honest with you. If she appears to be regretful about her past that means she shows remorse. If you love her why not forgive her and you both move on with your life together. God Bless!!

[The_Sage1 2]

I'd say that she has a really high risk factor for not being loyal. It's better to have a woman that would choose to not have any money rather than disrespect herself like that. For all you know, she could have another man she's sleeping around with and you wouldn't even know it. Don't rule this out. I hate to sound harsh...but consider these things - there's lots of great woman out there.

[Veemer 0]

I'd say that she has a really high risk factor for not being loyal. It's better to have a woman that would choose to not have any money rather than disrespect herself like that. For all you know, she could have another man she's sleeping around with and you wouldn't even know it. Don't rule this out. I hate to sound harsh...but consider these things - there's lots of great woman out there.

Yeah that has crossed my mind, right now my trust factor for her has gone down, im not sure if this is just my initial reaction or not but I guess time will tell. What you say is true and I appreciate that. Thank you

here goes,

My Fiancee fessed up to me on the phone just earlier, she comes from a poor family for Hilongos Leyte, she left and went to Manila to find a job, when I met her she was working at a waterstation. Now here is the kicker, she said its been on her mind for a very long time and wanted to tell me this so she can clear her conscience. During our conversation out of the blue she told me that she needed to tell me something, she said she used to work at a BEER HOUSE and would have sex with men for money, she claims she only went out 3 times till she no longer can take it as she was starting to lose respect for herself. Should I be affected by this ? should I lose sleep over this ? right now I am in a world of confusion and so much thoughts are racing thru my mind.

WHAT DO I DO ?

WHAT would you guys do ?

ADVISE ME PLEASE ?

hello veemer, how long you know your fiancee? did u visit her already? did you meet her family in leyte? did you support her financially? if you support her and she still doing her wrong doing, its not really good for you to pursue to get her and bring her in the usa, sometimes poverty is not the main reason, but it depends on the person itself, my advice is follow what is in your mind and heart, if you still love her give her a second chance, but if you have doubts leave her...tell her right away...to find her way...and you have time to move on....

Ive known her for 2 years, been there 3 times, I have met her family in Leyte all 3 times when i went there, this is something that she has done in the past a few years before she met me.

Im just really confused, I dont know what direction to go as of now, I think i just need some time and space away from all this..............

[Ndrangeta_one 0]

here goes,

My Fiancee fessed up to me on the phone just earlier, she comes from a poor family for Hilongos Leyte, she left and went to Manila to find a job, when I met her she was working at a waterstation. Now here is the kicker, she said its been on her mind for a very long time and wanted to tell me this so she can clear her conscience. During our conversation out of the blue she told me that she needed to tell me something, she said she used to work at a BEER HOUSE and would have sex with men for money, she claims she only went out 3 times till she no longer can take it as she was starting to lose respect for herself. Should I be affected by this ? should I lose sleep over this ? right now I am in a world of confusion and so much thoughts are racing thru my mind.

WHAT DO I DO ?

WHAT would you guys do ?

ADVISE ME PLEASE ?

Consider yourself lucky...

that at least the person got the "cojones" to tell you now, instead of waiting for Embassy Interview or after marriage to find out regarding the past.

These are some decisions, that only you can take and you have to make up your own mind...because at the end, you will be the only person that will have to live with the result of the decision you took.

Needless to say, that an INTIMATE medical is in order for both of you.....few vials of blood should be sufficient for all the testing required for any STD....and I mean ALL not just the most common one, because what is common there may not be common here and the same in reverse.

Long distance relationships carry additional risks....we do not have the luxury to be able to spend consistent quality time with the other person before engaging with monumental life decisions.

Edited December 6, 2009 by Ndrangeta_one

[George&Hazel 1]

Would you get involved with a hooker here? Poor is no excuse for prostitution. Most everyone there is poor.

Hate to be the one to ask, but have you considered being tested for stds now?

[Veemer 0]

Would you get involved with a hooker here? Poor is no excuse for prostitution. Most everyone there is poor.

Hate to be the one to ask, but have you considered being tested for stds now?

yeah im going to have myself tested on MONDAY, I feel violated