Holiday Hoopla...the good, the bad and the ugly...share stories, ideas, recipes etc

[Krikit 1,164]

Personally? I'd take the lists into consideration and give from my heart and within my budget. You can start a new tradition.

[darkchilde794 5]

I really dislike the way my husbands family celebrates Christmas... they give eachother lists and everyone gets what is exactly on their list. You can't sway from the list and perhaps buy them something from the heart, you MUST stick to the list.

This year everything on the lists are expensive. His mother has given us the list for her, her husband and my husbands brother and everything is over or close to 100.00. Times that by 3 and you have a pricey Christmas.

I suggested to my husband that we make gifts, like cookie mixes or hot cocoa mixes in jars and get baskets to put them in. I said we could make a really nice basket for everyone for under 50.00 per person. He said that we can't do that because they'll take it the wrong way. Wrong way? What the hell??

I say if you want those expensive items, then go buy them yourself, you'll take what I give you or I won't bother buying for you anymore.

*bearhugs Sprailenes* Im sorry to hear that hun. I feel very similarly about how my husband perceives Christmas. In his family, they give about 50 dollar gifts to everyone in the nuclear family and one person (for each of us) they pick for Secret Santa. I told him that this year, we bought a house and live in a one income household and just cant afford that much money... PLUS I dont want to spend that much for the WIL I suggested the same thing as you did, which is make Christmas presents instead -- recipe books or like a basket of yummies, but he says thats just too weird. In my family, we dont give presents as the holidays is really foor food and being together... and I tried to explain to him that his family should understand that we dont have that kind of money lying around, etc.

But anyway I just have to bite my tongue and respect his traditions. I think I will do the shopping and try to find something that looks like 50 dollars, but not really 50 dollars. It sucks and its soooo expensive, but this is just something I have to do for him

Goodluck with yours Sprailenes. Maybe some of the gifts can be bought online for cheap... like from overstock.com or something!

[Peachey 10]

Oh Sprailenes *hug* I know how you feel. My dad is the exact same way

[Marilyn. 340]

we decided a few years ago to not buy gifts for the adults.. we just buy gifts for our nieces and nephews...

it gets too expensive to buy something for everyone

[Darnell 8,478]

He was telling some of his patients, and they started to give him slack for not saving the trees lol....

Trees are a renewable resource. To be grown, harvested, used.

I never understand why someone wants to 'save a tree' when it's not a old redwood (ya, those I understand for saving )

Getting a real tree is fun - and is fun all season inside the house - the special smell always reminds you, is Christmas.

[Sprailenes 47]

The thing is, I would never give someone a list and expect stuff and if I made a list I wouldn't ask for things that are out of my own price range and expect someone else to foot the bill. But again different strokes for different folks.

It's just frustrating because she sends us these lists and we're like: "That's a little too expensive"

They kind of make me hate Christmas.

And I'm usually a really festive person, but I have a child, I think about him on Christmas... and my mom. I'm the only one who buys for her.

Edited December 3, 2009 by Sprailenes

[Peachey 10]

Varba's family makes me do a list by September usually...

So I get creative with mine. What do they do? Put GIFT CARDS on their list. Why don't we just give them moneY? Like c'mon.

[Sprailenes 47]

Yea I just don't like the "gimmie gimmie" aspect of Christmas.

[darkchilde794 5]

The thing is, I would never give someone a list and expect stuff and if I made a list I wouldn't ask for things that are out of my own price range and expect someone else to foot the bill. But again different strokes for different folks.

It's just frustrating because she sends us these lists and we're like: "That's a little too expensive"

They kind of make me hate Christmas.

And I'm usually a really festive person, but I have a child, I think about him on Christmas... and my mom. I'm the only one who buys for her.

I agree! I would never expect any of his cousins who are still in school to give me something worth 50 dollars you know -- I mean, its not like we are all in the prime of our careers and can afford bubblies instead of cheap wine So I kind of wish they dont expect me to do the same thing

[Chica Yeyé 41]

Yea I just don't like the "gimmie gimmie" aspect of Christmas.

gimmie.

now.

gimmie.

more.

[Krikit 1,164]

I asked my husband if I could tell his family not to get me any gifts this year but to donate something to the charity of their choice..... even if that "charity" is themselves. I honestly don't need anything. I especially don't want people trying to come up with something to give me if they can't afford to do it..... plus it will cut down on their stress level. He told me his family wouldn't understand and would be offended by that.

[Chica Yeyé 41]

I asked my husband if I could tell his family not to get me any gifts this year but to donate something to the charity of their choice..... even if that "charity" is themselves. I honestly don't need anything. I especially don't want people trying to come up with something to give me if they can't afford to do it..... plus it will cut down on their stress level. He told me his family wouldn't understand and would be offended by that.

Can I be your charity plz????

Edited December 3, 2009 by Chica Yeyé

[Krikit 1,164]

[Peachey 10]

A few nights ago I asked Varba if we could not do presents next year with hsi family since it's so complicated. he also said they would be offended.

I fail to see why we need presents. As an adult, if I need something, I go buy it. If I want something, I save up for it and then buy it.

[Danu 19]

Sprailenes - We do lists in our house but you dont always get whats on the list, and I would never ever get offended by cookie baskets. Cookies are yummy. My grandma use to give us HUGE tupperware containers filled with canned and boxed goods. Her idea was the same "one less meal to worry about" but the difference was, every family got a box, and it wasnt based on your finances, it was based on her genuine belief that a full belly is the best gift to give (and I loved her for it). To do the same thing from the angle of being poor...ugh. Its one thing that pisses me off about my future SIL as well. We have to budget and plan. We aren't poor but we could be if we just went crazy on stuff without planning sometimes, and she will just come up with crazy retarded ideas and then get offended when you tell her that shes the one who is going to have to pay for it then. Shes in school so she doesnt see herself as having to contribute to the money for her stupid gift schemes but she doesn't get (much like my sister doesn't) just because you have money doesnt mean you can waste it.

For Wes this year I think he will be surprised. His family does holiday dinners and things but he very very rarely has ever gotten a gift. Usually its just gift cards for like 5-10 bucks. Even for his Bday hes not use to getting anything. Its not about HAVING to get anything, I just love giving stuff to people that I know they will like and seeing their faces light up. This year my parents are leaving our tree up longer so that when he flies up for the move he will have his own little spot under the tree. Last year they got him chocolates and he was astounded that they would think of him at all. This year I think he will be super surprised and I can't wait