My beautiful wife is very irresponsible

[John&Juvy 36]

My sweet little Claudeth is a wonderful, giving woman but is also the most irresponsible person I have ever met in my life. I never seen anyone melt a bar of soap before but she does it. She can plug up the shower drain quickly and just loves to take 30 or 45 minute showers twice a day. She leaves the lights on constantly and the refrigator open all the time. She will fill her plate full of food and eat about 1/4 of it and the rest goes in the trash.

I am totally at my wits end. I have been dealing with this for 4 1/2 years but have made no progress in teaching her conservation. I love her very much and would never dream of getting rid of her but have been thinking of sending her to the Philippines for a visit.

Has anyone else had this problem? I have heard comments off and on but nothing consistant with what my little consumer does.

she needs to understand that just because she can do something, that does not mean she should. perhaps you should point out that this wastefullness on her part costs money, which curtails her shopping....

Conserve Resources ---> New Shoes!

new shoes could be the proverbial carrot.

BUY NEW

WWOOOOOOWWWW I like that #2 !!! lol. But seriously... Does she know the word meaning of "Self Respect" and "Shamefulness". I'm just wondering if does she know anything about life other than wasting time, food and money for shopping ? How old is she.... ? 17 ? lol sorry.... She is just un-f***ing-believable. Good Luck. Hope she'll realize what is the right and wrong about her before its already late.

[jsnearline 2]

You may be on to something here about little kid. I am finding out that her parents are the same way so I know where she got this. I just sent them some money (5000p) to pay the water and electric bill otherwise both would have been shut off. So, being the good and mature adults that they are, they went and bought a stinking camera with that money and then started hounding my business partner for money. My partner didn't know what was going on so she gave them another 9500p.

If your wife isn't working and being responsible, then why on earth are you sending money back to her family in the Philippines? It doesn't sound like she has any reason to listen to you and change her behavior. She's getting everything she wants without having to change.

My wife and I agreed that the only money that would be sent back to her family in the Philippines would come from her earnings. It's worked out pretty well.

Recently, after the Ondoy storm, my wife wasn't happy that her family wasn't taking any positive steps to begin rebuilding after their house was damaged. She told them she would not send them any more money until they stopped arguing with each other and came up with a plan for how to get started rebuilding. Funny enough, their attitude changed in a hurry.

Edited November 17, 2009 by jsnearline

[newlyweds 0]

[my 2 cents:

- use liquid sopa instead of bar soap - She can use a bottle of that in one shower

- do "light check" everynight before you both go to sleep... assign the task to her. she is not allowed to go to bed without ensuring that all lights are off - This morning while I was taking a shower she turned the closet light on because she was afraid of the dark

- give her a small plate. Though she would fill her plate full, she would be able to consume them. Anything I would do she would just take back to the kitchen and get a bigger plate

- tell her to find a job or limit her allowance. When she had a job she spent all her earnings on cheap jewelry and shoes (Charles knows about the shoes)

- dont spoil her. She is like the cat in Shrek, hard to resist that look

shoes are every woman's guilty pleasure lol.. take a woman to a shoe store and she'll become disoriented hahahaha

i know i would always find my way thru clothing, shoes, bags and all that stuff.. then hubby would pull me away, it's annoying not being able to mindlessly spend but at the same time, it reminds me of the bigger picture in the end lol i do want a house like my parents back hom in PI..

i think she lacks a little ambition, to become better, to be independent, and to reach a goal..

i think you spoil her too much.. A woman can easily be spoiled, and when that happens, it's not as cute as when she first tried to ask for something when you first got married, it's gonna be an ugly demanding debate...

and oh btw, how about for the rice you have a measuring cup right there next to the rice cooker? IF she's the only one who eats, im sure one cup is more than filling for the entire day.

OR how about you just nicely and as sweet as you can, ask her how many cups she'll need for a week and just have that much out. I mean have it in a container or something and let her budget that. Tell her the stores are running out or rice is gonna be 20% more expensive! lol

I think she needs to grow up and stop acting like a spoiled kid... But yeah, let her know about all the financial situation,maybe she'll slowly stop acting like a spoiled brat. SHe is serioulsy acting like your family is not gonna run out of all resources, and that's scary.

Tell her, if she wants to stay rich, she should learn to save, conserve and be mindful of the expenses because that's the only way you can hold on to your money. Tell her that if she keeps doing what she does, it's the electric company, the water company, the grocery stores that are gonna become richer and not you guys.. i bet she'll think twice

[anya-D 8]

my 2 cents

The problem is you.. doenst seems like you have a heart to say 'no' so until you can change, she's not going to change. But if you let it continue longer, it'll be a lot harder coz you know.. the older you get the harder it is for you to change!

good luck.

[pnrmbr975 1]

my 2 cents

The problem is you.. doenst seems like you have a heart to say 'no' so until you can change, she's not going to change. But if you let it continue longer, it'll be a lot harder coz you know.. the older you get the harder it is for you to change!

good luck.

I agree. Give her (and her family) tough love. And don't give her full access (privileges) to your financial resources so she wouldn't think she has more to spare.

[ManilaIdaho 2]

I guess jasman0717 is enjoying what his wife's doing,i think he just want to find out if he's not alone with what he's experiencing if he's bothered with it,i dont think he will stay with her and deal with it for 4 1/2 yrs

[JVKn'CVO 11]

My sweet little Claudeth is a wonderful, giving woman but is also the most irresponsible person I have ever met in my life. I never seen anyone melt a bar of soap before but she does it. She can plug up the shower drain quickly and just loves to take 30 or 45 minute showers twice a day. She leaves the lights on constantly and the refrigator open all the time. She will fill her plate full of food and eat about 1/4 of it and the rest goes in the trash.

I am totally at my wits end. I have been dealing with this for 4 1/2 years but have made no progress in teaching her conservation. I love her very much and would never dream of getting rid of her but have been thinking of sending her to the Philippines for a visit.

Has anyone else had this problem? I have heard comments off and on but nothing consistant with what my little consumer does.

You have a young and beautiful wife - that comes with a price. Count your blessings and let it go

Saludos,

Caro

[cEzYcHiC 0]

Wife just lost her rings in Miami International Airport.

Totally dumbfounded after learning that it was lost.

How could someone lose their rings when it's a symbol of your union?

You think that's irresponsible or just plain clumsy?

[Deputy Purple 1,294]

You have a young and beautiful wife - that comes with a price. Count your blessings and let it go

Saludos,

Caro

That is the worst answer I've read in this thread...

I have a young an beautiful wife and I will never accept such behavior.

As my wife she is my partner in life which means we have common goals.

If I just wanted young & beautiful arm candy I could buy that and not have to deal with the hassles Jasmine is.

[jsnearline 2]

Wife just lost her rings in Miami International Airport.

Totally dumbfounded after learning that it was lost.

How could someone lose their rings when it's a symbol of your union?

You think that's irresponsible or just plain clumsy?

That could happen to anyone, especially in an airport. You take your rings off to wash your hands, then get distracted by somehing and leave them behind as you rush off. Sometimes an accident is just an accident.

I used to take off my wedding ring and forget where I set it down. I've had a few close calls, but so far haven't lost it for good. Now I don't take it off for anything unless I'm at home.

[JVKn'CVO 11]

You have a young and beautiful wife - that comes with a price. Count your blessings and let it go

Saludos,

Caro

That is the worst answer I've read in this thread...

I have a young an beautiful wife and I will never accept such behavior.

As my wife she is my partner in life which means we have common goals.

If I just wanted young & beautiful arm candy I could buy that and not have to deal with the hassles Jasmine is.

Well, sorry you didn't like my answer but I'm only saying the truth. From what I know of Jasman and Claudeth, Jasman has a very good wife and it's in his best interest to strive to make her happy, even if she'll leave the closet light on, not finish her plate or waste a bar of soap.

Saludos,

Caro

[cEzYcHiC 0]

Wife just lost her rings in Miami International Airport.

Totally dumbfounded after learning that it was lost.

How could someone lose their rings when it's a symbol of your union?

You think that's irresponsible or just plain clumsy?

That could happen to anyone, especially in an airport. You take your rings off to wash your hands, then get distracted by somehing and leave them behind as you rush off. Sometimes an accident is just an accident.

I used to take off my wedding ring and forget where I set it down. I've had a few close calls, but so far haven't lost it for good. Now I don't take it off for anything unless I'm at home.

Yeah, I hope she learns from that. Badly wanna lash at her, but I can't stand to see her really upset.

I guess that's why I love her. Eventhough she makes mistakes, I could forgive her.

Lesson learned ladies, NEVER take your rings off.

[nowhereman 1]

You have a young and beautiful wife - that comes with a price. Count your blessings and let it go

Saludos,

Caro

That is the worst answer I've read in this thread...

I have a young an beautiful wife and I will never accept such behavior.

As my wife she is my partner in life which means we have common goals.

If I just wanted young & beautiful arm candy I could buy that and not have to deal with the hassles Jasmine is.

Well, sorry you didn't like my answer but I'm only saying the truth. From what I know of Jasman and Claudeth, Jasman has a very good wife and it's in his best interest to strive to make her happy, even if she'll leave the closet light on, not finish her plate or waste a bar of soap.

Saludos,

Caro

I thought it was a bad answer as well, sorry. I haven't read every page in this thread but if my wife acted like this I would have a long talk with her & if she continued her behavior I would take it as a sign of disrespect. Her behavior is well beyond the normal annoying habits that are a part of marriage life.

[Nessa 23]

i think the only way she'll learn not to waste is when she has to work and pay her own bills. if you've talked to her already, maybe it's time for some couples therapy.

Food waste is simply inexcusable for me. Remind her that so many people are starving in the world.

She will fill her plate full of food and eat about 1/4 of it and the rest goes in the trash.

ditto. I'm very bithcy when it comes to waste food. If i cook too much, leftovers have to be eaten. If I put too much food on my plate, i put the plate on the microwave, or the fridge and finish it later on. I hate wasting food. that's why i do grocery shopping every week. i buy exactly what we'll be having that week. I already planned the meals and i know i'll need only 2 tomatoes, no need to buy 6, that 1 gallon of milk will be enough, sometimes some things go to waste, but it's rarely.

[Rocky_nBullwinkle 6]

My sweet little Claudeth is a wonderful, giving woman but is also the most irresponsible person I have ever met in my life. I never seen anyone melt a bar of soap before but she does it. She can plug up the shower drain quickly and just loves to take 30 or 45 minute showers twice a day. She leaves the lights on constantly and the refrigator open all the time. She will fill her plate full of food and eat about 1/4 of it and the rest goes in the trash.

I am totally at my wits end. I have been dealing with this for 4 1/2 years but have made no progress in teaching her conservation. I love her very much and would never dream of getting rid of her but have been thinking of sending her to the Philippines for a visit.

Has anyone else had this problem? I have heard comments off and on but nothing consistant with what my little consumer does.

4 and a half years... wow!.... Is she helping out with the bills and grocery shopping? Sometimes when people have to pay for things, then they will learn how to appreciate it better.

She is helping to make the bills

I'll say your Claudeth is quite a handful. She needs spanking.