Posting grievances publicly

[mox 298]

Yesterday in another thread, it was pointed out by a moderator that grievances should be made to mods or Ewok via pm. Well, I've done exactly that in the past, and it usually goes like this: I pm a mod (or get a response from a mod after reporting a post). Sometimes the mod is helpful, but often the mod is condescending and dismissive. For example, recently when I reported a TOS violation, I got the wonderful "if you feel that the thread is offensive to you or you have issues with the content then I would suggest that you should avoid that thread altogether."

So then I escalate to Ewok, who ignores me completely. Oh, Ewok is probably busy, that's understandable. Except that over the last 2-3 months I've pm'd Ewok on 4 different occasions, without a single reply.

So...Ewok and moderators, if you really want dirty laundry aired in private, then how about treating the membership who deign to break the holy police tape that separate the mortals from the mods with a little respect? Quit with the templatized, snarky, condescending bullshit answers and try to actually address our real concerns using real non-corporate-double-speak. I understand and accept that I've made myself somewhat unpopular with the moderator community, but it's your *job* to provide good moderation, despite your personal opinion of me and my windmills. If you can't be impartial or treat other members outside your own personal clique with a little respect, then please step down.

Part 2 of a good "keep dirty laundry inside" policy is: Ewok, how about answering your pm's? I don't care if it's a one-sentence reply where you just say "sorry, I'm backing the mod on this one" or whatever. Just give me and others the courtesy of a few milliseconds of your time.

So please, mods, either stop griping that grievances need to be taken to pm, or handle them in a way that you would want your own grievances handled. And Ewok, you are the escalation process. If we don't feel like you are listening, then we don't feel like we are being heard. I shouldn't have to be saying this, this is all "Forum Moderation 101" stuff. But there it is. Heed it or ignore it as you like, just please stop telling us to take grievances to private chat unless you're willing to change how you handle them.

Also I lied in the topic description. There are no unicorns and rainbows at VJ. Just dogs in fights, American men who hate American women, British people who don't trust the postal system, uppity Australians, guns, pie, and bitchy whiny moxen. Which, when you think about it, rul3z over unicorns.

[NArocks 13]

wonder how long before this is closed?

Good point Mox

[Nagishkaw 510]

Maybe Ewok doesn't like you.

[Chris_Жанна 11]

Someone said I could find some pie here????

[What Happened? 4]

[Welshcookie 17]

Personally, I don't get the whole mail box thing half a mile away from your house....I mean anything could happen to your mail!

[TBoneTX 46,071]

This sounds fishy, si man. In before the lox... er, mox... er, lock, si man.

[mox 298]

I'm told that many people like mox on their bagels!

I guess I'm partial, but I'm curious why anyone would think this thread lock-worthy. Aside from my usual directness, there's nothing in my OP that should be considered offensive to any mod or admin. The moderation team would like complaints to be addressed via a less public conduit, which in the general case would probably be a good thing. I'm offering the solution. I'd love to offer this solution via a less public conduit, but that route seems to be currently unavailable.

[rebeccajo 14]

Personally, I have a big problem with being told to take it to PM. Especially when it's being done to 'circle the wagons'.

And it always sounds like you are being put in the corner with your nose to the wall. "Oh take it to PM this isn't the way to handle things".

Bah. Load of BS in my opinion.

Edited November 11, 2009 by rebeccajo

[mox 298]

Personally, I have a big problem with being told to take it to PM. Especially when it's being done to 'circle the wagons'.

And it always sounds like you are being put in the corner with your nose to the wall. "Oh take it to PM this isn't the way to handle things".

Bah. Load of BS in my opinion.

I don't mind taking a one-off grievance to pm, it's the civil thing to do. If I have a problem with another poster or a mod, or a very particular problem that the rest of the world really doesn't need to be involved with, that's cool. There is, after all, not usually a need to embarrass or single out people in public. But I need to be met half way. I'll take it to pm if my issue is treated seriously. If, on the other hand, they're going to blow smoke up my аss or ignore me, then I'm going to reciprocate in kind.

And just to caveat, when I say I want my issue treated seriously, I recognize that it's not always going to go my way. I may not like your decision, but I'll eventually live with it (possibly after some impassioned back and forth) if I feel like I got a fair hearing.

[rebeccajo 14]

Personally, I have a big problem with being told to take it to PM. Especially when it's being done to 'circle the wagons'.

And it always sounds like you are being put in the corner with your nose to the wall. "Oh take it to PM this isn't the way to handle things".

Bah. Load of BS in my opinion.

I don't mind taking a one-off grievance to pm, it's the civil thing to do. If I have a problem with another poster or a mod, or a very particular problem that the rest of the world really doesn't need to be involved with, that's cool. There is, after all, not usually a need to embarrass or single out people in public. But I need to be met half way. I'll take it to pm if my issue is treated seriously. If, on the other hand, they're going to blow smoke up my аss or ignore me, then I'm going to reciprocate in kind.

And just to caveat, when I say I want my issue treated seriously, I recognize that it's not always going to go my way. I may not like your decision, but I'll eventually live with it (possibly after some impassioned back and forth) if I feel like I got a fair hearing.

Depends.

If people are just bickering because they hate each other that's one thing.

I don't think anyone in power can tell the difference anymore. Moderation on Vj isn't anything at all like what it should be given it's origin as a news group to HELP people. At least as far as the upper forums go, it's pretty much become a free-for-all where it's easier to learn about how to get AROUND immigration procedures than to comply with them.

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

I think this is all an indication of society's problems as a whole. It is our duty to aire all our dirty laundry in public, so that the community could learn as a whole.

Plus, it is much more entertaining that way.

[Chica Yeyé 41]

I would be interested in hearing from Ewok about this. Mox brings up a very interesting point, and so does becca.

[rebeccajo 14]

I would be interested in hearing from Ewok about this. Mox brings up a very interesting point, and so does becca.

But we aren't hearing anything but crickets now - are we?

[Chica Yeyé 41]

I would be interested in hearing from Ewok about this. Mox brings up a very interesting point, and so does becca.

But we aren't hearing anything but crickets now - are we?

I hear you sister.

I love VJ. Not only has it helped me and countless others with our immigration ordeals, but i have made friends that will last for a long time. But the way things are now, it is disheartening. Really, and a lot. A lot of wrong advise, sometimes even allowing for a bit of "oh, you can do that as long as they don't find out" ####### is being let slide. And I am talking about upper forums here. This should stop.

People b1tch about me being too blunt. Well, immigration IS a blunt and invasive process; and I am not about to sugar coat it for anyone. I'd rather the OPs hate my guts for a while, and then be reunited with their loved ones, than have them adore me for cuddling them and then be slapped with a denial, or even worse.

I hope Ewok responds to this thread.