Immigrant's Nightmare Continued

[babybunny 2]

the diffrence every relation must face is ..

is it " REAL LOVE" or is it "PUPPY LOVE"

if your confused go thought this process you will know for sure!

[MichelleandCraig 1]

Shon, did you even read this thread? Craig has been here over a year and had his visa ages ago. Ah,nevermind

[babybunny 2]

like I said ..

the diffrence every relation must face is ..

is it " REAL LOVE" or is it "PUPPY LOVE"!

looks like PUPPY LOVE ... real love would have kept him by yourside

you or he uttered this:

" he says he loves me as well...he just can't fathom living here his entire life."

your married HIS PLACE is by YOUR SIDE - YOUR PLACE is by HIS SIDE according to the bible! he that finds a wife finds a good thing. where was he last night?

[RaspberrySwirl 20]

Michelle, ::hugs::

Edited February 19, 2006 by RaspberrySwirl

[babybunny 2]

you can ignore me I dont care. maybe you dont like what I am saying. but, the very thing I said to you - is the very thing you are questioning.

[MichelleandCraig 1]

he was here with me. there's your answer Shon

Thanks Swirls and Rebecca...I just saw your as it was on the last page. You guys are really sweet, and I appreciate that now more than ever. ((hugs)) back. Michelle

Edited February 19, 2006 by MichelleandCraig

[Welshcookie 17]

I hope the both of you find some resolution to this soon. It's been going on a very long time.

In the meanwhile, Michelle, you know you have the support of many here.

And remember this....you read the 'rosy' and 'happy' posts.....don't for one minute think that EVERYTHING is those couples worlds is perfect and sublime. Everybody in this process has adjustments to make and conflicts to resolve. Different people just handle things differently. And if there is an 'issue', some people post it here, but most don't.

There's not all this 'perfection' out there. You and Craig have just had more challenges than many, and you've been more 'out there' with it. You've taken a lot of suggestions and criticisms, and you've managed to either digest the good or reject the bad.

Class act, I think.

Shon, did you even read this thread? Craig has been here over a year and had his visa ages ago. Ah,nevermind

For those of us who have been following this thread.....love to you both...... Rebeccajo speaks wise words always..

[babybunny 2]

he was here with me. there's your answer Shon

Thanks Swirls and Rebecca...I just saw your as it was on the last page. You guys are really sweet, and I appreciate that now more than ever. ((hugs)) back. Michelle

Michelle. you need to find your own answer. rather he is with you or not. that is your PRIVATE business.

one thing is certain- his place is by yourside. your place is by his. being there in body and not in mind is not

being there togeather. you spend all this time hen pecking on the PC about your relation- you have not figured it out YET! when you marry you marry as ONE- married enough times never knowing what real love was. it was all puppy love. looked cute on paper til reality set in. we relealized we were never bestfriends.

it was only strong like. instead of sitting your tail on the chair. I would be be constantly talking and working on things. if he dont wanna live here ok thats one thing. driving on the wrong side of the road kind of issues. see you are talking about your MARRIAGE. so maybe you get your behind to UK and yall be happy. life is too short for all this usless bulldog. be HAPPY thats all you and hubby gotta do.

[babybunny 2]

ps.. in my posting i was refering to me being married more than once.

not sure about if this is your 1st or 20th marriage not the issue.

the issue is work it out and be happy.

[diadromous mermaid 36]

he was here with me. there's your answer Shon

Thanks Swirls and Rebecca...I just saw your as it was on the last page. You guys are really sweet, and I appreciate that now more than ever. ((hugs)) back. Michelle

Michelle. you need to find your own answer. rather he is with you or not. that is your PRIVATE business.

one thing is certain- his place is by yourside. your place is by his. being there in body and not in mind is not

being there togeather. you spend all this time hen pecking on the PC about your relation- you have not figured it out YET! when you marry you marry as ONE- married enough times never knowing what real love was. it was all puppy love. looked cute on paper til reality set in. we relealized we were never bestfriends.

it was only strong like. instead of sitting your tail on the chair. I would be be constantly talking and working on things. if he dont wanna live here ok thats one thing. driving on the wrong side of the road kind of issues. see you are talking about your MARRIAGE. so maybe you get your behind to UK and yall be happy. life is too short for all this usless bulldog. be HAPPY thats all you and hubby gotta do.

While I don't disagree that there can eb times when people marry and then realise they are not meant to be together, didn't you post that your husband was booted for having married you for immigration benefit? Is that what you call "puppy love"?

[babybunny 2]

yeah DM.

it was puppy love. that dog loved the mighty green card.lol

his behind is mighty deported..lol its ok I am not ashamed

I dont want no one going thought the mess I have been through..

michelle

I dont think you have a man that is a dog.

he loves you and you love him. thats why you gotta work it out.

get past the puppy love and get to the real love if that is what you have. only you can answer that.

[Peggy 1]

BIG HUGS MICHELLE

[MichelleandCraig 1]

Ok. A couple of things...Shon, for one I am not going to respond to all of your insulting remarks in the one post you made. Think what you'd like to think of me; as you may see, I have more pressing matters on my mind than what Shonjaved thinks of me. To answer the one question you think seems to be the end all be all to our relationship...YES. It is real love for us and is not puppy love. We've both been there and done that as far as the latter which is why we waited until ages 32 and 34 to get married...we were waiting for the right person. Now, if I'm done justifying our feelings to you, this is for the rest of you who have been so caring and supportive:

We have been discussing it and Craig may go back to England sooner...as soon as the next couple of weeks. We don't know yet. He may also quit his job, which worries me as it is close and good money..and he almost has his CDL through them but not quite, but he has to do what he has to do, so I'll just roll with that. He may also stay more like a month instead of two weeks. What concerns me, is I think he will come back having missed us,etc etc, but I also don't think that will last more than a couple of weeks or a month. I've been heartbroken over a lot of things lately, and I love Craig...he's an enormous chunk of my heart...but I just don't know what's going to happen at this point. I guess this is what can happen when someone loves another person, but just can't feel normal elsewhere. He says that is what he misses the most..feeling normal and not out of place. I don't entirely understand not being able to 'get' to feeling normal here after a while, but I'm also fully aware that I've never been through it. I have already, and I'm sure I will again, take flack for saying this, but I'm just not prepared to move to England with the state of our relationship right now. I have already given my reasons earlier in this thread, and I won't defend them further. I'm also not uprooting just myself, but Corey as well. I'm currently looking for a councelor to talk to all of this about..not because many think I should either...I'm mature enough to make my own decisions(and not meaning to offend anyone!! that may have suggested that by saying that) but my Doctor thinks I should and I think it will help as well. Only problem is, when I lost my job due to their moving to China, I lost my insurance and for the time being I'm on Badgercare. My Doctor's office couldn't find an office nearby that accepted it, but I am going to call the county courthouse and see if they know of anyone or have any suggestions. I really need to vent at this point. Don't get me wrong in all of this; Craig has complaints and issues too..but like someone said earlier you all know I'm not an angel in this either...but I have really really tried to be kind and loving to Craig and no matter how much he says he loves me, I just don't get that back from him. The kindness, yes, the loving things..no. I'm heartsick about what may happen with us, depressed and all the like, but I'm also hopeful that things will still work out. Thank you all for your continued support, and those of you who are just going to pop on here and say I'm in the wrong because I won't move, or he obviously doesn't love me because of anything I've written here, please restrain yourself. We're both dealing with enough already, and sometimes there are just extenuating circumstances. I hope the rest of you are doing well, and think of many of you often. Michelle

Edited February 20, 2006 by MichelleandCraig

[Peggy 1]

HUGS MICHELLE

[Welshcookie 17]

Michelle...

I don't think you are 'wrong' at all in not wanting to uproot and move to the UK, I am sure you both discussed the best place to live when you decided you wanted to marry, that choice was made and viewed to be the best....Craig's depression/homesickness should not blur that. I really hear your saddness and fear about Craigs month long holiday to the UK.....but maybe you should start to view it in a positive light...time out for YOU, time for you to recover and rest from the situation, more time for you and Corey(I am sure it has been tough for him to see you go thro this)....I know this has been an enormous pressure for you and I am hoping that separating yourself from the current situation will help you see things in a different light. I hope you get what I am trying to say

There isn't anything we can do or say to make things better for you I know that....but be assured we are always here to listen when you want to vent....