The Vent - Part Trois

[Sprailenes 47]

An Army recruiter told me to do that LOL, but I went back to Canada. If I have to immigrate and leave my family, I'd like to be in Canada with them until the time I really have to go...that was my logic.

I know that they're really trying to crack down on illegals nowadays. It's crazy here. Immigration checkpoints everywhere...thank god the first time I was paranoid and took my passport...

That's another thing! The complete rush to get down here! I mean I know it's the love of our lives, but come on, you're leaving your home behind... wouldn't you want to spend time with family and friends? Get all the Timmies in that you possibly can? Chunky chicken salad sandwiches!!! CHIP STANDS! KETCHUP CHIPS! PC BRAND! ETC ETC!!!

Okay I'll stop now you all know what I mean.

I just think it's kind of scary that some people can't deal with being apart at all. Danger Wil Robinson! Stage five clingers! DANGER!

Kidding.... well only if I've offended someone

[SapphireDreams 71]

That's another thing! The complete rush to get down here! I mean I know it's the love of our lives, but come on, you're leaving your home behind... wouldn't you want to spend time with family and friends? Get all the Timmies in that you possibly can? Chunky chicken salad sandwiches!!! CHIP STANDS! KETCHUP CHIPS! PC BRAND! ETC ETC!!!

Okay I'll stop now you all know what I mean.

I just think it's kind of scary that some people can't deal with being apart at all. Danger Wil Robinson! Stage five clingers! DANGER!

Kidding.... well only if I've offended someone

I totally agree with you about dealing with being apart. I know it's hard, but come on.. it's not the end of the world! You have the rest of your lives to be together!

Sometimes I wish for the days when we were long distance, LOL. I love my space and doing my own thing.

[Sprailenes 47]

You and me both!

My MIL keeps inviting us down to the shore on weekends and I have been trying to convince HIM to go.

[The_Dude 1,142]

You and me both!

My MIL keeps inviting us down to the shore on weekends and I have been trying to convince HIM to go.

I know you want to go down to the Jersey Shore, with your in-laws Nev. Tell The Situation and Snooki I said wassup

[Bern. 3]

That's another thing! The complete rush to get down here! I mean I know it's the love of our lives, but come on, you're leaving your home behind... wouldn't you want to spend time with family and friends? Get all the Timmies in that you possibly can? Chunky chicken salad sandwiches!!! CHIP STANDS! KETCHUP CHIPS! PC BRAND! ETC ETC!!!

Okay I'll stop now you all know what I mean.

I just think it's kind of scary that some people can't deal with being apart at all. Danger Wil Robinson! Stage five clingers! DANGER!

Kidding.... well only if I've offended someone

In my experience, at first it was a big rush..but then, as months went by I didn't want to leave. I've been in the US for almost 2 months...I'm finally getting over the fact that I live here now. When I got here in April, I just wanted to pack up and go back the way I'd come...but when my husband gets deployed again, I'm going home in a heartbeat. XD

[Ban Hammer 13,343]

Of people?!?

soylent green!

[SupportGeek 21]

soylent green!

That seems like it would be high in calories and saturated fats

[trailmix 77]

I kind of think it should be the opposite - AOS should be allowed. We basically allow it in Canada, why would anyone want to make it harder for people instead of easier?

Allow inbound applications, allow people to travel freely - that's the right way to do it imo. Why make it hard on people.

Also, different couples are different. Some are ok with the being apart thing. Some couples have a situation, for instance, where one or both travel all the time for work and they are happy as clams - so sometimes it's self inflicted rather than something forced, like immigration.

For some couples this would not be an option, some actually enjoy being together all the time. My Husband and I are like that, we like being around each other. Are we joined at the hip? No. We are free to move independently about the world - but we would much rather be together.

You can push it both ways to make a couple look 'deficient' somehow.

Wellll they always want to be together so they are just sooo dependant.

They just don't like being around each other, they obviously haven't found their soul mate - they don't have the same bond that we do.

Neither is right - to each his own

[ashenflowers 5]

hah... I've been here 5 months, on the dot today actually (well POE'd 5 months ago... +5 days of driving to actually get here)... I STILL want to go home, but as I've vented recently, our situation is unique and craptastic, and I'm sure I'd think differently if things weren't how they are for us.

I don't know how I feel about AOS. In someways I feel like trailmix, and think they should allow it and make it easier, and completely get rid of the K-1 actually. In others, I feel they should not allow AOS at ALL if you just crossed and married on a 'whim'. Partially that's what makes it so hard to be apart in the first part of the process. Knowing that others AREN'T apart (because they're cheating the system) though they SHOULD be apart just like most of us had to be. Ultimately though, the system is NOT fair. So one way or the other it needs to be changed so that there are no ways for people to cheat the system and make it harder on those who are trying to do it right. Of course, I think it should be changed so everyone can be happy, but that will never happen.

I have an old high school friend who I've recently reconnected with. She moved to the US and got married (no visa), and attempted AOS. I'm not sure what happened after that... I don't know if she ended up getting her green card. Now she's decided to move back to Canada, and he visited her frequently and *shock!* (not) was turned away at the border on one of his visits. So now she's talking about just wanting to move back to the U.S. Well I'm sorry sister, but it's not that easy to just turn around and come back. They're royally screwing up their case on BOTH sides of the border, and frankly, I don't feel sorry for them. They got a lawyer (*point* *laugh*) and aren't listening to my insistence on doing their own research and checking out this website, and roadtocanada to talk to people who have actually been through the system, and KNOW what we're talking about. They're seriously going to be screwed. OR, they're going to cheat the system. Either way, it pisses me off.

[Sprailenes 47]

Okay I never said that I didn't like spending time with my husband. I do enjoy spending time with him, but I am able to spend time apart too. I don't NEED to be with him, and it won't KILL me if happens.

I think the law is the law and people tend to pretend not to know it, that's what we're talking about. If it's against the law to come in with intent... then why not make it harder for people who do AOS. Sure you can wish it were okay, if it were legal, I wouldn't care so much. But I have watched people knowingly break the law because they don't feel like the law applies to them, nor do they want to spend time away from their significant others. The rest of us have... what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.

To each is their own... that's why it is up for discussion and no one is saying it is right or wrong, but we all have our opinions on the subject.

Except coming in with intent to marry and staying and applying for AOS is technically wrong. That's what we're mostly talking about here.

Edited June 3, 2010 by Sprailenes

[ashenflowers 5]

Okay I never said that I didn't like spending time with my husband. I do enjoy spending time with him, but I am able to spend time apart too. I don't NEED to be with him, and it won't KILL me if happens.

I think the law is the law and people tend to pretend not to know it, that's what we're talking about. If it's against the law to come in with intent... then why not make it harder for people who do AOS. Sure you can make it okay, if it were legal, I wouldn't care so much. But I have watched people knowingly break the law because they don't feel like the law applies to them, nor do they want to spend time away from their significant others. The rest of us have... what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.

To each is their own... that's why it is up for discussion and no one is saying it is right or wrong, but we all have our opinions on the subject.

Yah, that's the thing that frustrates me. People are breaking the law and know it, and get away with it! Like 'oops, I stole this car... sorry officer, I didn't know! *flutter eyelashes*'.. 'well ok I'll let ya off with a warning'. That wouldn't happen! Unfortunately, the law is such that maybe they're not breaking the law because there's that silly grey area re: intent.

Man, the immigration system here needs a complete overhaul really. I'd also campaign for anyone who's in my situation to be able to freaken WORK damnit.

[Flames9_RN 358]

Allowing people to move here may have been just fine back in the 80's, but with terrorism, surely not now! I have no problems with more security checks, yes easy to say now since I'm here, but I felt the same back in 2004! Yes poor me, stuck in Canada,lol can't get the latest Apple Ipod/Iphone/Itab until a few months later, lol. People have to make decisions that best for their situation.

[Sprailenes 47]

Yea I would have no problem if it were legal. But I watch people turn their noses up to it. If you're going to allow it, allow it... otherwise do something about it to make it harder. Don't leave a giant grey area in between.

I have told people, we have all told people that they can't come in with the intent to marry and stay. Many people say: "Well we don't want to be apart" None of us did... this isn't an easy process. But for some reason they go ahead, break laws and get away with it. Yea it needs an overhaul... that's an understatement.

[Kathryn41 3,205]

I guess I would be fine with AOS for people who are here on another visa who meet and marry an American - student, employment, some version of investor, TN, etc. Allow them to adjust status from within the US as they were legitimately here for another purpose to begin with and met and married an American. They've already gone through some sort of security process and health clearance process in order to obtain the other visa. For those who enter on a tourist visa - and Canadians visitors are basically that - then, yes, I agree that they can get married but they need to complete the process from outside of the US before they can live here. They can visit and stay here during parts of the process but will need an actual spousal visa in order to live in the US/get a green card. That might solve it from both ends.

Edited June 3, 2010 by Kathryn41

[Marilyn. 340]

so I have a silly little vent

so sometimes I will make muffins or cookies and my hubby will eat them all in a day or two and then complain a few days later that there isn't any cookies etc.. it is like....well geez, if you wouldn't eat them all at one time they might last longer

so lately I hide some in the freezer so I have some goodies to put in his lunch for work...