Do you really want your relative in the US ?

[spookyturtle 9,466]

I'm not exactly keen on making any friends here, so it has impacted my experience.

It couldn't be your miserable, negative, egotistical, holier than thou attitude, could it?

Must have missed the critical red part.

We don't like each other. Great! Now get over it.

Who said I didn't like you? You have a bad attitude son.

[jundp 191]

Know whatcha mean - we are living in the US South of Vancouver Canada and we can play in Vancouver/Victoria and the islands which are stunning..

Where do you live?

I get about 11 weeks paid vacation, plus all the major holidays And we have health insurance paid for by my husband's employer. So yeah, I feel pretty blessed.

To the OP: none of my husband's relatives would ever move here again, but they did live in America for 6 years. His father is a physicist and was transferred to Boston in the late 90s. They like it well enough, but not enough to move back. They prefer Germany.

I considered Germany. I was dating a psychiatrist in OstFriesland. When I told my son I was off to Germany to see a psychiatrist he said 'about time'. Little Rat. Munich would have swung it, but Bremen ? She wanted to live in Wester Ross, Scotland - makes the wilds of Washington State look like Times Square.

I am trying to have the run of both continents so I can experience the best of both and hopefully avoid the worst of each.

I wonder how it would be if it was all like the EU and people could just move easily back and forth..... I wonder if they would move their families. How many Brits do move to Germany permanently and how many Germans move to the UK permanently. They can move tomorrow with no papers required - but they don't much - and those who do, don't seem to move their families.

I love Germany. My husband's family is from a small town in the south, in Baden-Wurttemburg, but close to Ulm, Stuttgart, Munich so you can have the big city if you want it. He has an excellent job here that he loves, but we have discussed moving back eventually.

Btw, you should hang out with the Seattle Catholics, we don't mind if you have a beer or 6

[Nessa 23]

i don't know of any relatives of mine that would like to live here. i have a friend who would because her bf moved here, but that's it.

[Captain Oates 911]

I love Germany. My husband's family is from a small town in the south, in Baden-Wurttemburg, but close to UL, Stuttgart, Munich so you can have the big city if you want it. He has an excellent job here that he loves, but we have discussed moving back eventually.

Btw, you should hang out with the Seattle Catholics, we don't mind if you have a beer or 6

We are planning next year's holidays in Germany - start from Frankfurt and do the Rhineland and then Heidelburg etc. Did it on my motorbike once. Excellent. I love the bar flies in Munich though - they are almost as pythonesque as me in their humour.

I live East of the Cascades so it's a struggle to get over the mountains to Seattle after mid November (snow).

I have found a Brit pub in Seattle that was ok...cottage pie. I don't think anyone is as welcoming and friendly as the American guys I hang out with it but I will always be a foreigner and I have realised that. My Friday night drinking buddy in England was Polish. He had been there 35 years and struggled with English a lot of the time and wasn't sure of a lot of customs and 'meanings'.

I do know for sure that if I say as much as 'it's cold this morning' then I am 'criticising America' so I know to only say positive things about anything or else. In England you hear everyone talking about horrible little parking spots and third world road systems and lousy weather and stupid foreign policy so it's an adjustment to live somewhere where only positive comments are acceptable. I think that is the first thing a US immigrant needs to learn and it's the same in OZ from what I hear. It's ok now coz I know the rules. When the locals ask me how I like it here I reel off 4 extremely positive things and then say 'But it's a bit far from the next town' and their faces drop and they don't like it. Done that several times. Only 100% favourable comments are acceptable. My American wife has observed the same thing when she says anything not 100% glowing so I take the point about regional differences.

A relatives suitability from that aspect has to be considered

[Empress of Groovy 373]

I love Germany. My husband's family is from a small town in the south, in Baden-Wurttemburg, but close to UL, Stuttgart, Munich so you can have the big city if you want it. He has an excellent job here that he loves, but we have discussed moving back eventually.

Btw, you should hang out with the Seattle Catholics, we don't mind if you have a beer or 6

We are planning next year's holidays in Germany - start from Frankfurt and do the Rhineland and then Heidelburg etc. Did it on my motorbike once. Excellent. I love the bar flies in Munich though - they are almost as pythonesque as me in their humour.

I live East of the Cascades so it's a struggle to get over the mountains to Seattle after mid November (snow).

I have found a Brit pub in Seattle that was ok...cottage pie. I don't think anyone is as welcoming and friendly as the American guys I hang out with it but I will always be a foreigner and I have realised that. My Friday night drinking buddy in England was Polish. He had been there 35 years and struggled with English a lot of the time and wasn't sure of a lot of customs and 'meanings'.

I do know for sure that if I say as much as 'it's cold this morning' then I am 'criticising America' so I know to only say positive things about anything or else. In England you hear everyone talking about horrible little parking spots and third world road systems and lousy weather and stupid foreign policy so it's an adjustment to live somewhere where only positive comments are acceptable. I think that is the first thing a US immigrant needs to learn and it's the same in OZ from what I hear. It's ok now coz I know the rules. When the locals ask me how I like it here I reel off 4 extremely positive things and then say 'But it's a bit far from the next town' and their faces drop and they don't like it. Done that several times. Only 100% favourable comments are acceptable. My American wife has observed the same thing when she says anything not 100% glowing so I take the point about regional differences.

A relatives suitability from that aspect has to be considered

Is Boston a possibility? There, bitchin' and moanin' is an art form much like it is in England.

[Captain Oates 911]

Is Boston a possibility? There, bitchin' and moanin' is an art form much like it is in England.

I liked Boston - went on board the Constitution and romped on the common. Someone said it snows sometimes ?

All the bar staff were Irish Patriots (illegals Mr Dobbs) who had been marooned since 9/11 and couldnt nip home like before and were cheesed off with that - and they were a bit wary of the Cromwellian English Imperialists (me in my banana and oranges shorts). Otherwise top spot with lots of brick buildings and I must go back. Wifey liked it too.

[jundp 191]

Is Boston a possibility? There, bitchin' and moanin' is an art form much like it is in England.

I liked Boston - went on board the Constitution and romped on the common. Someone said it snows sometimes ?

All the bar staff were Irish Patriots (illegals Mr Dobbs) who had been marooned since 9/11 and couldnt nip home like before and were cheesed off with that - and they were a bit wary of the Cromwellian English Imperialists (me in my banana and oranges shorts). Otherwise top spot with lots of brick buildings and I must go back. Wifey liked it too.

Yeah, I'm from the south originally. We like our whining down there too, but no one else can complain!

[Captain Oates 911]

Yeah, I'm from the south originally. We like our whining down there too, but no one else can complain!

Liked it in the South too (LaGrange, Georgia)

A lot of the women are stunning for a start ... actually I lost my train of thought now...

Didn't like New Orleans - steaming hot, cockroaches, flat

Been to SF twice for a week each time and nearly died of cold and rain and driving wind (post mexican meal)

These States really are States like European Countries so I need several lifetimes to figure out all the cultures.

I would love to learn whether Americans get into trouble in the UK when they say they don't like this or that. The 'warm beer' comments don't infuriate Brits who simply see it as an opportunity to convert someone to 52 degree bitter beer.

There must be something that riles the Brits but I can't think what. References to 'the losers of 1776' might work with a small number but I think the main attribute of the Brits is apathy. Apathy is a great aid to peace and tranquility. The Americans are energetic and actually care about stuff whereas the Brits don't care about much at all as long as the floodlights are on for the footy

A land of peace and quiet snoring. Perhaps apathy might be the imported culture that would finally pacify Afghanistan.

Win hearts and minds by getting em to say - Stuff the Taliban, stuff the yanks, stuff the Brits, stuff em all, what's kind of curry are we having tonight chucky ?

[DEDixon 39]

I love Germany. My husband's family is from a small town in the south, in Baden-Wurttemburg, but close to UL, Stuttgart, Munich so you can have the big city if you want it. He has an excellent job here that he loves, but we have discussed moving back eventually.

Btw, you should hang out with the Seattle Catholics, we don't mind if you have a beer or 6

We are planning next year's holidays in Germany - start from Frankfurt and do the Rhineland and then Heidelburg etc. Did it on my motorbike once. Excellent. I love the bar flies in Munich though - they are almost as pythonesque as me in their humour.

I live East of the Cascades so it's a struggle to get over the mountains to Seattle after mid November (snow).

I have found a Brit pub in Seattle that was ok...cottage pie. I don't think anyone is as welcoming and friendly as the American guys I hang out with it but I will always be a foreigner and I have realised that. My Friday night drinking buddy in England was Polish. He had been there 35 years and struggled with English a lot of the time and wasn't sure of a lot of customs and 'meanings'.

I do know for sure that if I say as much as 'it's cold this morning' then I am 'criticising America' so I know to only say positive things about anything or else. In England you hear everyone talking about horrible little parking spots and third world road systems and lousy weather and stupid foreign policy so it's an adjustment to live somewhere where only positive comments are acceptable. I think that is the first thing a US immigrant needs to learn and it's the same in OZ from what I hear. It's ok now coz I know the rules. When the locals ask me how I like it here I reel off 4 extremely positive things and then say 'But it's a bit far from the next town' and their faces drop and they don't like it. Done that several times. Only 100% favourable comments are acceptable. My American wife has observed the same thing when she says anything not 100% glowing so I take the point about regional differences.

A relatives suitability from that aspect has to be considered

i think Americans are very sensitive to a foreigner's criticism because we've heard it all our lives and many of us are tired of it. even when America does something good for the world, it is often criticized as not enough. America is always doing either not enough or too much. We stick our nose in a matter and the world tells us to mind our own business, we ignore a matter and we are accused of not doing enough. Every war we get in is the wrong war, but wars that we ignore are the ones the world wants us in. No matter what we do, it is the opposite that the world wants us to do.

rarely do we ever hear thank you either.

i remember when iceland and new costa rica were polled to be the happiest people on earth and people made a big deal about for all the riches we americans have we aren't the happiest people. i don't see how we ever could be to be the happiest honestly. the US is tough living and then we have the world constantly complaining. i wish the usa was like costa rica, she had no military, she had no or few outside the countries looking at her to solve their problems, no country was begging for hand outs, no country looked to her to assist when natural disaster hits, when tall buildings are built she doesn't have to think about planes plowing into them... etc., etc. oh how happy we would be.

i could go on and on but it would be a wast of time.

[Captain Oates 911]

No it wouldn't be a waste of time - learning people's heartfelt and genuine opinions are never that.

The US is big and has an extreme range of climates and the population has an extreme range of religious/political opinion. It's a staggering and exhausting project to try and conceptualise the whole which is the USA. Poor Mr O he has his work cut out.

The US has the capacity for extreme good in the world but sometimes makes mistakes which are bound to be big and public given the size of the enterprises. On balance though, the US is idealistic so the extent to which it can go wrong is tempered and limited by the morality of the population and their right to free speech.

I look forward to the time when Americans can relax and say that on balance, the good they do far outweighs the mistakes and so they are quite happy to hear the mistakes as they are confident that they have far more good to talk about. Self confidence in other words. Given the recent past I can see why that self confidence has been shaken - let's hope its temporary.

I am applying to be a US citizen next year and I wouldn't do that if I didn't believe in the capacity of the US to be a force for good and my belief that it has a great future as such. I really do think it's going the right way now and it will grow and grow in respect and the right kind of power.

Unless health care gets fixed it will still be too tough for my relatives here and the world will still wonder how it can be left like it is. It's a badge of honor to look after one's own sick and wounded.