Yardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

[nyseness 0]

One other question. So I went to dinner with my family last week. We are discussing my fiance moving here and everyone is so excited about it. My sister calls today and says she will bring over some coats and sweaters and boots since she and my fiance wear the same size. My grandmother leaves me a voice mail and say that she has some stuff too. My family are pricey shoppers so I know they will be giving her some good stuff cause they like to show off like that. So I was talking to my fiance about this a couple weeks ago and told her that they might have done this. Her response was that she does not like hand me downs and not a charity case.

It is not that we cannot afford to buy her winter clothes cause I made provisions for this. But I figure why turn away gifts that are given with the best of intentions. I am not one to get into a pissing match over something like this. I just do not want to offend my family, but I have a woman who has intense pride.( Yes, something to work on). I wish someone was this generous to me when I came here years ago with a sweater during a blizzard. Is it a man's thing that we will accept gifts like this, but women have difficulty doing this? Or am I marrying the exception to the rule here?

I can tell you right now......growing up w/Jamaicans parents me wearing someone else clothes is not going to work. I made that mistake when I was a child and lets just say I never did that again..... My parents were not having it AT ALL!!!!!

[nyseness 0]

Congrats Jonesie!!!

[BelwinMills 0]

Good afternoon

Graduation was last Wednesday and as of now I start Bachelors program @ end of this month

Now looking for another job, but enjoying the break and being able to sleep in

I saw all the discussions I missed but my dial up (yes I am in the stone ages) is slow and nuff time dem a log mi off so I'll just start in from this page. Hope everyone has been doing well.

Congrats that is os awsome

[BelwinMills 0]

Anna I am like you took the relationship slow and made sure I could trust my man. I had heard stories from my professor who knew that some guys used ladies to get her and all. I took my professors advice and wanted to feel my way through this relationship one step at a time. We had dated for three years until we got engaged with 2 or 3 trips a year. I knew what my professor was saying was some what true on my first trip way back in 98 I have to laugh I was proposed to by three men or should I say young crazy boys . I was only 19 then. My hubbys friends are always askin me to bring down woman for them to and LOL. So I knew I was going to take it slow with my hubby. The funny thing though he took it way to slow. So I gave him an ultimatum get that stinken Birth Certificate and we will talk and my God he did. Trust has to be a big factor when u live so far away. I think my past professor is in shock we are married and mad we didn't invite her. Anyways TRUST IS KEY!!! and TIME HAS BEEN THE KEY TO ME AND KIND!

Anna thanks for sharing your reunion story it makes me not feel so bad at all.... I know Evaston is much bigger than this cornfield.

Also I have three very good childhood friends from high school. One came with me. One said no she wouldn't go. The other one came up with an excuse on Friday that she would be late and then at the last minute came up with another excuse she was to tired not to go and she really passed me off. Some things never change we will call her mrs unreliable. End of that store.

Clothes thing my hubby likes hand me downs so far. If my brother out grows something he will take it. He doesn't care. He said my mom and I could buy his clothes. And if I can't afford it he will take what my bro can't wear no more cause they around the same size tall and big. He is trying to help me out cause I really don't have any money at all. Thanks to my parents giving me a wonderful Christmas present a plane ticket to see him. Yes and I don't mind cold showers or staying at his house with 6 other people. You do what u got to do. At least I will see him..

How many months does it take to hear back from the processing centers of Visas? 6 months? It has almost been 2 months since I sent my stuff in. my head is pounding ugh... time to go.

OH YEAH I FORGOT TO SAY GO BEARS!!! Monday night football..... Thank goodness the game isn't here..

One Luv

J

[Jamaica to CT 0]

Congrats Jonesie

[Mrs. Palmer 5]

Ok, not to throw anyone off here, but so far I have myself, Kelly, and Shemonya meeting up this weekend? Anymore folx in the MD/VA/DC area? Also, what's a central location for us all?? I mean, I will be coming from Upper Marlboro--Shemonya from Ft. Washington, and Kelly you're from Ellicot City right?

Ok, I have a new topic for you guys: What is the ONE thing that you did/have done while u were waiting for your SO to arrive, that you would ordinarily NOT do, but to please them--you did. For example, last night, my SO and I engaged in the most intimate and freaky phone sex that we've had to date! Now, while this is not the 1st time that I have done it with/for him, this might have been the dirtiest (but he loved it---and it got the job done--[b]TWICE[/b] ) Now, in any other relationship I've had b4, I would never have done this...and believe me, a man or two has tried to get me to go there...but I just wouldn't. It's just with my baby, I'll do anything with him and for him--put it all out on the table--(or in this case, on the phone), if that's what it takes to keep this going. It's not that I don't like doing it...because truth be told, once we really get going it's good for both of us, but for him, there was never a NO I won't do this...what can I say...I DO LOVE MY BABY!!! Be free to have fun or do whatever you like with this discussion...it's just something I was thinking about in a meeting 2day!!

[wynterstail 0]

I would graciously accept the gifts on her bhalf and put them away. Later on, if she wants to look through, it's up to her. I would suggest buying a nice jogging suit, something velour and brand name, and some cozy cashmere socks.

One other question. So I went to dinner with my family last week. We are discussing my fiance moving here and everyone is so excited about it. My sister calls today and says she will bring over some coats and sweaters and boots since she and my fiance wear the same size. My grandmother leaves me a voice mail and say that she has some stuff too. My family are pricey shoppers so I know they will be giving her some good stuff cause they like to show off like that. So I was talking to my fiance about this a couple weeks ago and told her that they might have done this. Her response was that she does not like hand me downs and not a charity case.

It is not that we cannot afford to buy her winter clothes cause I made provisions for this. But I figure why turn away gifts that are given with the best of intentions. I am not one to get into a pissing match over something like this. I just do not want to offend my family, but I have a woman who has intense pride.( Yes, something to work on). I wish someone was this generous to me when I came here years ago with a sweater during a blizzard. Is it a man's thing that we will accept gifts like this, but women have difficulty doing this? Or am I marrying the exception to the rule here?

I can tell you right now......growing up w/Jamaicans parents me wearing someone else clothes is not going to work. I made that mistake when I was a child and lets just say I never did that again..... My parents were not having it AT ALL!!!!!

[Shemmy 4]

Congrats Jonesie

[Elizabethnhenry 0]

Way to go, Jonesie!! You are on your way, girl!!

[brownnskinn 0]

Congrats Jonesie

Ditto

[rhondapayter 0]

Tony surprised me tonight and cooked me lobster tails for dinner He can't even eat lobster because he's allergic to shell-fish but he knows I love it!! He' so sweet sometimes

I can't STAND the cold weather!!! Craig said he likes it ??? Then he asked yesterday if I had heat here in the house (as he only had boxers and no shirt on???).

Thanks again for all of your support !!!

I hate the cold too I don't think Tony minds it as much as I do He works outside almost all year long here! @ Craig wondering if you had heat in the house!!

How are you guys doing? Did you decide anything yet?

Re hand-me-downs:

Look I can't even handle washing my clothes with another person's; my whole life, I have washed my clothes separately from my siblings and my mom. And I wash my clothes separately from Henry's

What?!!! Why must everything be washed seperate? I never heard of that before. Except for the Rasta's who won't wash their clothes w/ the woman's underwear

I love passing on clothes. When I was younger I always got my older cousin's hand-me-downs. My younger sister got mine. Our younger cousin got hers, etc.. My girlfriends and I trade clothes we no longer want/ can't fit into It's a very cheap way to expand your wardrobe.

[tali 0]

One other question. So I went to dinner with my family last week. We are discussing my fiance moving here and everyone is so excited about it. My sister calls today and says she will bring over some coats and sweaters and boots since she and my fiance wear the same size. My grandmother leaves me a voice mail and say that she has some stuff too. My family are pricey shoppers so I know they will be giving her some good stuff cause they like to show off like that. So I was talking to my fiance about this a couple weeks ago and told her that they might have done this. Her response was that she does not like hand me downs and not a charity case.

It is not that we cannot afford to buy her winter clothes cause I made provisions for this. But I figure why turn away gifts that are given with the best of intentions. I am not one to get into a pissing match over something like this. I just do not want to offend my family, but I have a woman who has intense pride.( Yes, something to work on). I wish someone was this generous to me when I came here years ago with a sweater during a blizzard. Is it a man's thing that we will accept gifts like this, but women have difficulty doing this? Or am I marrying the exception to the rule here?

To your previous question - I would get her a short coat and a long one. The short one can be leather (with lining) or wool (like a pea coat). The long one can be wool (looks nice with dresses, etc.).

I grew up on hand me down coats. I miss them. But unless the tags are on - other hand me downs can sometimes feel different. Your family are still strangers to your financee - so despite their well wishes, I would not push this issue.

Yes, a lot of this stuff is about pride. And its also about wanting to distinguish herself as an individual. My fiancee and I had a huge fight a week or two after he got here because he felt like I was picking everything out for him. (Mind you I had been doing this for years but it was different when he didn't have a choice.)

I would thank your family but say you don't want to overwhelm or embarass your fiancee. I would ask if they might just provide one or two articles of closthing (sweater, coat, etc.) and present them to your fiancee as clothing she can use until she finds the things she likes. This gives her an option. She may decide she likes what your family gives her - and if she does, it will be her choice.

T

[Elizabethnhenry 0]

Re hand-me-downs:

Look I can't even handle washing my clothes with another person's; my whole life, I have washed my clothes separately from my siblings and my mom. And I wash my clothes separately from Henry's

What?!!! Why must everything be washed seperate? I never heard of that before. Except for the Rasta's who won't wash their clothes w/ the woman's underwear

I am afraid of germs, I guess. I just think everyone else is nasty and I am clean. I really cant help it. My company did not install toilet seat liners in the stalls until I clogged the bathroom making my own liners. Americans have a bad habit of squatting in office or public restrooms. Ok on occasion but considering how much time we spend at work, this is very bad to not empty your bladder or whatever else completely. OK enough potty chat.

[Trinilad 0]

Thank you all for the great advice. So I brought my fiance a long and short coat yesterday and explain to my family that it may be a bit for her so i will take a few items and then after meeting her, they can offer her anything else and see how she responds. This is all new for her and she is such an independent woman. She has never had to depend on anyone for much and this is going to be a challenge until things settle in. Buy you know how love does wonderful things to people. I told her if all else fails, we would walk around naked together until she finds her own clothes. Should have thought about that before I said it cause it's so cold here in Baltimore (he he)

Yes, I think I heard enough on this one. Phew!

Re hand-me-downs:

Look I can't even handle washing my clothes with another person's; my whole life, I have washed my clothes separately from my siblings and my mom. And I wash my clothes separately from Henry's

What?!!! Why must everything be washed seperate? I never heard of that before. Except for the Rasta's who won't wash their clothes w/ the woman's underwear

I am afraid of germs, I guess. I just think everyone else is nasty and I am clean. I really cant help it. My company did not install toilet seat liners in the stalls until I clogged the bathroom making my own liners. Americans have a bad habit of squatting in office or public restrooms. Ok on occasion but considering how much time we spend at work, this is very bad to not empty your bladder or whatever else completely. OK enough potty chat.

Re hand-me-downs:

Look I can't even handle washing my clothes with another person's; my whole life, I have washed my clothes separately from my siblings and my mom. And I wash my clothes separately from Henry's

What?!!! Why must everything be washed seperate? I never heard of that before. Except for the Rasta's who won't wash their clothes w/ the woman's underwear

I am afraid of germs, I guess. I just think everyone else is nasty and I am clean. I really cant help it. My company did not install toilet seat liners in the stalls until I clogged the bathroom making my own liners. Americans have a bad habit of squatting in office or public restrooms. Ok on occasion but considering how much time we spend at work, this is very bad to not empty your bladder or whatever else completely. OK enough potty chat.

You know this is one of these sights where it is free expression and who am I to be a spoil sport . But the bathroom habits of Americans are a bit much, you think? All right. There goes my breakfast!

[Elizabethnhenry 0]

Sorry Trini, you know I love you!