Ukraine saying?

[jake61 0]

Jake,

Thanks for the additional information. It looks to me like you are approaching things in a thoughtful, balanced way in spite of the time frame you outlined earlier. If I may ask, what city are you going to visit? Definitely stay in touch.

Nikolaev, Ukraine.

It seems strange to me that cities of a half million people do not have airports.

[jake61 0]

Nikolaev, Ukraine.

It seems strange to me that a city of one half million people does not have an airport.

I am trying to get a decent flight in to Odessa because it is only a 3 hour bus ride to Nikolaev instead of the 6 hour bus or 12 hour train from Kiev.

[baron555 934]

OK, let me explain.

This is an example of some of the things we have talked about.

Jake

Wow, I agree 1000% with both of yours viewpoints on a relationship and what makes a successful one.

I also agree that using modern communication methods, two serious and honest people can learn an awful lot about the other and not have physically met.

Your path is the same path that Alla and I undertook; we got to learn all about each other first. From this we learned we are 100% compatible with each other and have the same wants and desires and ambitions. Then we met and our hearts confirmed what our heads (the upper one for me) had told us.

Good luck to you and please come back often to this forum. There are a lot of very nice men and women here who are very quick to help.

I have had the pleasure of making a lot of friends here and some we have or will meet up with either in the US or in Russia / UA.

Edited October 24, 2009 by baron555

[jake61 0]

Sorry about the double post earlier. I had my main computer hiccup and it didn't post right away.

I live in rural Iowa (kind of) and word of mouth here can be pretty fast sometimes. I have learned of about two dozen couples living in the area. Also it seems there is a community of about 10,000 Russians in Chicago.

I am getting Skype setup on my end. She has had it, but not setup correctly, so she can communicate with her niece in Moscow.

I think it will help with any home sickness if things progress.

[baron555 934]

Sorry about the double post earlier. I had my main computer hiccup and it didn't post right away.

I live in rural Iowa (kind of) and word of mouth here can be pretty fast sometimes. I have learned of about two dozen couples living in the area. Also it seems there is a community of about 10,000 Russians in Chicago.

I am getting Skype setup on my end. She has had it, but not setup correctly, so she can communicate with her niece in Moscow.

I think it will help with any home sickness if things progress.

You will find your relationship will take off with Skype; ours did. Being able to see each other and using gestures will help her with her English.

[Brad and Vika 129]

Jake,

Thanks for the additional information. It looks to me like you are approaching things in a thoughtful, balanced way in spite of the time frame you outlined earlier. If I may ask, what city are you going to visit? Definitely stay in touch.

Nikolaev, Ukraine.

It seems strange to me that cities of a half million people do not have airports.

True. My wife is from Kherson, about an hour or so away from Nikolaev. If you are staying there for weeks, you will probably see the zoo and the other touristy stuff in the course. If/when you run out of easy stuff to do, consider a few days in Odessa. You will probably fly in there ir Kiev. Customs can be (I say CAN, not must, so no need for scads of posts about how great the customs people are) be tough for a first-timer. There are lots of decent restaurants, parks, music, and of course the opera house to see. It is also geared for visitors, at least at the center. Odessa is one of our favorite places to spend idle days. We stay at Odessa Executive Suites, and they do free airport shuttles, free American style (sort of) breakfast, and have an English fluent staff. Happy to elaborate if you like.

Cheers

[jake61 0]

Thanks for the tip on Odessa Executive Suites. I made a note of it.

The biggest problem I have so far is getting used to the time difference. Sometimes I do not know if I am coming or going. What I mean is I have a clock on one of my monitors that shows her time. I go by that a lot so I can greet her in the morning before she goes to work and when he gets home after work. Sometimes we spend anywhere from 2 to 4 hours at a time emailing each evening. So when it is time for to go to work I think I will go do some things in town and I turn around and it is the middle of the night. When she goes to bed it is early afternoon for me. It just gets confusing sometimes. Then there is the constant calculating of when I need to do something and I have to tell her I will not be at home at certain time to talk to her.

When I first get there about the middle of December she will be working during the day. Any sight seeing will probably be done on weekends. It will also be winter there so that limits some things. After new year she has 10 days off.

I think she is pretty tired after a day at work. I do not think we will do a lot at first. She says she has never had Chinese foods so we may just go out to dinner some until her days off.

I am not into seeing big central government buildings or the grand european buildings. Most people want to go see them. But I think back to those days of slave labor and wonder how the workers were treated building those monuments to some dictators ego.

From what I have noticed prices are cheap compared to the states for basic items. Except for imported items, they seem more expensive than here. It seems a lot of the people in Ukraine do not ever have enough money to get past the basics. That is my observations so far. Am I wrong?

Anybody got good ideas on how to cope with the time apart?

I will ask her if she got her webcam going with skype.

Jake

Edited October 24, 2009 by jake61

[Brad and Vika 129]

Thanks for the tip on Odessa Executive Suites. I made a note of it.

The biggest problem I have so far is getting used to the time difference. Sometimes I do not know if I am coming or going. What I mean is I have a clock on one of my monitors that shows her time. I go by that a lot so I can greet her in the morning before she goes to work and when he gets home after work. Sometimes we spend anywhere from 2 to 4 hours at a time emailing each evening. So when it is time for to go to work I think I will go do some things in town and I turn around and it is the middle of the night. When she goes to bed it is early afternoon for me. It just gets confusing sometimes. Then there is the constant calculating of when I need to do something and I have to tell her I will not be at home at certain time to talk to her.

When I first get there about the middle of December she will be working during the day. Any sight seeing will probably be done on weekends. It will also be winter there so that limits some things. After new year she has 10 days off.

I think she is pretty tired after a day at work. I do not think we will do a lot at first. She says she has never had Chinese foods so we may just go out to dinner some until her days off.

I am not into seeing big central government buildings or the grand european buildings. Most people want to go see them. But I think back to those days of slave labor and wonder how the workers were treated building those monuments to some dictators ego.

From what I have noticed prices are cheap compared to the states for basic items. Except for imported items, they seem more expensive than here. It seems a lot of the people in Ukraine do not ever have enough money to get past the basics. That is my observations so far. Am I wrong?

Anybody got good ideas on how to cope with the time apart?

I will ask her if she got her webcam going with skype.

Jake

Not sure if you mean the time difference or the time you are physically apart. After Vika left the US (we met here). I visited her three or four times before she was able to come back. While you are there the work thing is likely to be tough down-time. Do you know any Russian? If you can get familiar with the alphabet at least, I would say use the time to explore her city. See if you can find places you walked to together when you are alone. Try to visit a shop or grocery one day, buy her a few flowers (odd number only) the next. Although sushi is catching on in Ukraine, other types of restaurant are tough to come across. two weeks ago I found a really nice (and cheap) Chinese place in Odessa on Troika St., and can give you directions and other good spots there. You are correct in saying that staples and even restaurant food is cheaper there, and this is because of the exchange rate. If elections go before you get there the currency will tank and prices (in dollars) may be even better.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Hello:

Newbie here.

I am conversing with a Ukrainian woman through online translation for a month now. She has said something to me twice now that I do not understand. It is ""I will be a book on your table". It sounds provocative, but I do not have a clue for sure.

I have asked her but she says "I will be what you want". That doesn't help me understand her mind or thoughts much either. It sounds like she will be submissive, which is not my goal.

I pressed her some more and she told me to "dream and look". I think dream to her means sleep.

Just call me confused.

Anyone from Ukraine can help with this?

It means she will be there when you need her. She means it. stop pressing her, they hate that. Ask here.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Nikolaev, Ukraine.

It seems strange to me that a city of one half million people does not have an airport.

I am trying to get a decent flight in to Odessa because it is only a 3 hour bus ride to Nikolaev instead of the 6 hour bus or 12 hour train from Kiev.

I don't advise it. You will pay more for flights to Odessa, plus have layovers, plus it is near impossible to get back to the USA from Odessa without an overnight layover, unless you go through Istanbul. Flights to Kiev are the cheapest by far and there is a bus there that will take you right over to the train station. My guess is you will arrive in Nikoleav about the same time but wil save money. Send her a few bucks for the train to Kiev and you can meet her at the airport and train it bck with her.

Sorry about the double post earlier. I had my main computer hiccup and it didn't post right away.

I live in rural Iowa (kind of) and word of mouth here can be pretty fast sometimes. I have learned of about two dozen couples living in the area. Also it seems there is a community of about 10,000 Russians in Chicago.

I am getting Skype setup on my end. She has had it, but not setup correctly, so she can communicate with her niece in Moscow.

I think it will help with any home sickness if things progress.

Chicago also has the largest population of Ukrainians of any city in the US. tehre is a whole Ukrainian neighborhood on the north side

[baron555 934]

Chicago also has the largest population of Ukrainians of any city in the US. tehre is a whole Ukrainian neighborhood on the north side

And, that neighborhood is called Ukrainian Village. It's on Chicago's NW side.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Jake,

Thanks for the additional information. It looks to me like you are approaching things in a thoughtful, balanced way in spite of the time frame you outlined earlier. If I may ask, what city are you going to visit? Definitely stay in touch.

Nikolaev, Ukraine.

It seems strange to me that cities of a half million people do not have airports.

It is Ukraine. (by the way NOT "the" Ukraine) The airport in Odessa is older than airplanes. And looks it. Modern planes are embarrassed to land there. It was train station at one time. Airplanes are used by almost no one in Ukraine, there is no demand for airports all over the place. The cost of the flight you will take to Kiev or Odessa represents maybe 3-4 months pay for a Ukrainian, most of them never imagine they will fly. They have an excellent system of railroads at cheap rates. I advise 2nd class tickets and if traveling with your lady, buy the whole "couper" 4 tickets, so you get a private sleeping berth. They are not expensive. The airport in Kiev is fairly modern and reliable, and comparable to an old airport in a city the size of Dubuque (for a local reference) beyond that it gets dark very quickly. I have had a devil of time getting flights on time from Odessa and Donetsk, sometimes yes, but be prepared to miss your connecting flight coming back and I spent many a night in the airport in Prague, Munich, Brussels and even Kiev.

Air service and airports in Ukraine are nothing like here, but the train stations are awesome!

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Thanks for the tip on Odessa Executive Suites. I made a note of it.

The biggest problem I have so far is getting used to the time difference. Sometimes I do not know if I am coming or going. What I mean is I have a clock on one of my monitors that shows her time. I go by that a lot so I can greet her in the morning before she goes to work and when he gets home after work. Sometimes we spend anywhere from 2 to 4 hours at a time emailing each evening. So when it is time for to go to work I think I will go do some things in town and I turn around and it is the middle of the night. When she goes to bed it is early afternoon for me. It just gets confusing sometimes. Then there is the constant calculating of when I need to do something and I have to tell her I will not be at home at certain time to talk to her.

When I first get there about the middle of December she will be working during the day. Any sight seeing will probably be done on weekends. It will also be winter there so that limits some things. After new year she has 10 days off.

I think she is pretty tired after a day at work. I do not think we will do a lot at first. She says she has never had Chinese foods so we may just go out to dinner some until her days off.

I am not into seeing big central government buildings or the grand european buildings. Most people want to go see them. But I think back to those days of slave labor and wonder how the workers were treated building those monuments to some dictators ego.

From what I have noticed prices are cheap compared to the states for basic items. Except for imported items, they seem more expensive than here. It seems a lot of the people in Ukraine do not ever have enough money to get past the basics. That is my observations so far. Am I wrong?

Anybody got good ideas on how to cope with the time apart?

I will ask her if she got her webcam going with skype.

Jake

I had the great opportunity to live and work in Ukraine for 2 years, Odessa. The monuments to dictators are long gone. You will see no reference to Stalin. If you look around carefully in Odessa and other cities you may find a sewer cover with the hammer and sickle, but that is about it. I guessed they missed a few. The architecture is beautiful in most Ukrainian cities, Kharkov being my favorite. Slave labor as they knew it (serfdom) was banned in 1867. Nothing you see is the result of slave labor. People were paid, not greatly it is true, and were given housing food, medical care, tranportaiton and basically everything they needed (though maybe not to western standards). They were not slaves and you should not suggest that to a Ukrainian. I am not supporting the Soviet system, do not get me wrong. But do not feel that what you see was built by slaves, it was not.

There is much to be in awe of in Ukraine. You, nor any American, can imagine the horrors that were inflicted on the Ukrainians in the second war. You can visit those monuments to things that never happened here, that will never happen here. You can listen to the odler folks and their stories of eating grass for nourishment. Can you even imagine that every family has suffered a loss and to this day you cannot find a Ukrainian that did not have a close relative killed. (BOTH Alla's grandfathers). I have never seen in my life a society that respects their elders as Ukrainians. Ukrainians dfo not hold doors open for women, they hold doors open for older people, men and women. They have the most the wonderful respect of the men and women that died to protect their country, it is deep, true and sincere to this day. They will "thank" old gentlemen on the street wearing their war ribbons (something a lot of the old WW2 veterans do, I suspect so they get put to the head of the line...LOL) There is not many of them left anymore.

There are still damaged areas in every city that have yet to be rebuilt. The Opera Theatre in Odessa (worth a trip to Odessa just to see that) was being rebuilt when I was there and didn't re-open intil 2007. The apartment house across the street from me was rubble, bombed multiple times in WW2. They began working on that while I was there also.

Experience their life as they live and believe me you will be emlightened. Hey, I know they are not living in mud huts, it isn't the thrid world by any means...but I promise you not 1 in 100 Americans would live the way your fiancee does. I think American teenagers ought to do 2 years apprenticeship in Ukraine! You will NEVER again complain about our post office!

Ukrainian women will knock your socks off...be prepared.

Enjoy it, marvel at it

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Jake

Regarding prices in Ukraine, most things are relatively more expensive there, clothes are very much more expensive. Food id about the same, maybe a little cheaper for local food items, but given the average income of a Ukrainian it is much more of the family budget. Persoanl services are cheaper because of low wages. A manicure is much cheaper than here, for example, or a haircut. It actually makes sense to repiar shoes, purses, clothing, etc. since they are expensive to buy and cheap to fix.

When you travel there, some good gifts to bring are practical things. Ukrainians are emminently practical people, especially a mature woman. One of the best gifts aI ever brought Alla was a set of good quality, hi-tech, long underwear. Y'know, the kind. Very thin, veru warm made of some hi-tech synthetic. They spend a lot of time outdoors, walking, riding on busses, etc and there is no good quality, thin, comfortable long underwear available. Alla laughed when she got it because she thought it could not possible keep her warm. It did! Next trip she wanted more, for her mother, her sons, etc. Great stuff! I told her it was so I could keep her warm when I wasn't in Ukraine. LOL Clothes, electronics, accessories, shoes are MUCH cheaper here. Alla says "almost free". Typically Alla takes a suitcase of clothes over just for gifts for her mother and friends, sometimes two suitcases. She brings back what is cheap there...cosmetics (some cosmetics, not all), pharmacueticals, contact lenses, her favorite hand and face cream (that stuff is NOT cheap, but she can only get it there and of course she has to have THAT brand) etc. I used to have a whole list every time I went over to Ukraine and it was stuff like ...flashdrives, CD disks, gloves, MP3 player for Pasha, camera memory cards, knit hats, maple syrup (in increasing quantities), regular womens underwear and socks, stockings (NO pantyhose than you God), shoe polish, chocolate, small teddy bears (she collects those), winter coats, tee shirts with silly phrases for the boys. She never requested jewelry, US souveniers, flowers, lingerie, etc. Not that she would enjoy those things, just not high on their list.

Most Ukrainians enjoy theatre (plays), opera, classical music. Check out the theatre there and go to some concerts or plays. We went to the Odessa Opera, a really stunning, first class Opera, and the best seats in the house were $20! I splurged. Entertainment venues are quite cheap. There ought o tbe several plays or concerts going on in the city when you arrive. There are places all over the city displaying handbills of the performances. if you don;t read Ukrainian, maybe she will for you (Nickolaev will be predominantly Ukrainian speaking)

Brad is right...flowers in odd numbers only! 11 or 13 is the Ukrainian dozen. Do not overdo it on fresh flowers, yes they are nice, if you buy too many they will think you are not clever with your money. Not a good thing even if you are wealthy. They cannot eat flowers. LOL Same with jewelry, lingerie or any other "rmantic" gifts. Be cautious and do not go overboard. If she has children or a mother alive, anything you think to bring for them will win you triple points! Ukrainian women tend to care more about their mother or their children than themselves.

The agency you are using, well known and respected that I have heard, will offer all sorts of services. You will get what you agree to and pay for...but you can do any of it yourself cheaper. Google "Nickolaev rents" and you will find lots of apartments available for rent much less than hotel rooms and usually much better. Restraunts tend to be very reasonably priced, so that will not be a problem. There are some expensive ones, of course, but the majority are in the $10 per person range or less for a decent meal. IF you do not drink. We do not so our eating out is pretty cheap.

Also, if you are not already corresponding directly with her, arrange to do so when you are there.

[jake61 0]

Please notice when I was talking about buildings and slave labor I said european buildings, meaning central and western europe where most american tourists go on vacation. I did not say eastern european.

The flights I checked where the ticket had Odessa as the final destination was only $100 more round trip.

If she were to meet at the airport I would end up losing days with her because I would have to arrive on a weekend.

When I checked airfare to go to Moscow (niece fror xmas) from Kiev the train was $110 per person one way. That is $440 for the round trip for both. I checked airfare and it was $320 round trip for both of us.

The suggestions I was looking for was coping when I am here and she is there.

She is anxious for me to go to Ukraine and see her. So anxious she at times wants me to come ASAP instead of the planned holiday trip (I am still waiting for my passport). I think later she would regret it if I came sooner rather than later were I am to meet her niece and family over xmas in Moscow.

If everything goes well, the 6 months will be a long time during the K-1. I will probably have to make at least one more trip. I wish I could stay most of that time, but it is beyond my control to stay more than 25 days at a time.

I have been in a few foreign countries. I do not need to be entertained. Besides she has a small remodel job I might want to get involved in. I also have a notebook with text to speech. Type english and it speaks russian. I am not worried about anything. Any place I go will be by cab. I have heard you have to agree on price before you actually sit in the cab.

Jake