Old VJ versus New VJ???

[Laura_and_IanM 0]

So I have been thinking and thinking about some of the threads that have been started in regards to how things have changed on VJ. I have also been thinking about the flaming that happens to occur whether we like it or not. TBH, I have not been a member for very long so I can't honestly say what VJ was like before I became a member, but I can honestly say that I have been helped numerous times and yes I am one of those that have asked the same question repeatedly...if that makes me thick..then I guess all I can say is "stupid is as stupid does".

As far as ppl coming on here and changing their ID's so they can start something, I want to just make a few comments on that. First, what we have to remember is that ppl that feel the overwhelming need to do that, have stepped into a new reality...which would be as I like to call it "internet reality". These ppl are no longer with us. For whatever reason, the internet has become their life. Sad but true. At first, I kept asking myself and others, why do ppl feel the need to go to such extremes? There has never been a conclusive answer for that one. For me personally, I in a way, tend to feel sorry for them. I am not saying that I would defend their actions, but I do wonder what their life was like before they slipped into this non existance state of mind and into cyber space, and I wonder what took place in their lives that they are now a few fries short of a happy meal upstairs if you know what I mean.

Now, as far as the flaming goes, there are always going to be ppl that disagree with what I think or what the next person thinks. It doesn't mean that either person is wrong or right. Just think of how boring this world would be if we were all the same (old saying I know but oh so true). I have recently pm'd someone to tell him that I thought that altho he was quite eloquent in his words, I felt that he would really come across as being to harsh with his words and sometimes sound judgemental which does lead to a flame war. It is all good and fine when someone gives their opinion, and I can handle it all. If I didn't then I wouldn't post on here but that is just me. But, when we respond to ppl we need to remember that we aren't trying to get someone to think the same way that we do, we are just trying to open their eyes to another take on things. I know that Ian use to tell me that I had to tone things down a bit ( this was pre VJ), and taught me how to approach things in a different light. I then was able to step back and look at how I reacted and he was right (but shhhhhhh don't tell him that...ladies you know what happens to our men when they find out that they were right ...oh so ugly lol). I use to literally get so wrapped up in getting my own opinion across that I didn't take the time to look or think of what I was saying. I couldn't look past my own nose to realise that I was hurting ppl instead of constructively trying to get my point across. This is not something that ppl tend to admit to lol. I am not perfect and far from it. I still do things or say things that I look back on and think..."God I am so stupid for saying that". I don't like to talk about my past but occasionally on here have posted things for which I thus far have appreciated no one judging me for.

All of us are on here for a reason, the same reason..which means that each and everyone of us have something in common. Yes, lets continue to agree to disagree but lets try and break the norm and NOT flame one another for having our own individual thoughts and opinions. I don't expect the wars to stop, but I think we can stop personally attacking one another..that is what pm is for lol..

I hope no one takes offence to this thread. I just wanted to get this off my chest and shed some light on things. If anyone wants to flame me then I would greatly appreciate it if you could not respond on this thread and be an adult and pm me. I will never get offended for someone stating an opinion that is opposite of my own.

Thanks VJ for all the support thus far...

LJ

[incanada1234 0]

but I think we can stop personally attacking one another

You're living in a dream world, my friend.

[CarolineM 0]

Dude...it's a message board...it's NOT the be all end all of our lives...and if it is, well, I'm sorry for you.

Why do we have to sit and ruminate about how it's changed and blah blah blah...it's A MESSAGE BOARD.....

[Jaylen Brit 0]

Seems pretty much the same to me - a few more trolls maybe now n again (and I like playing with trolls on occasion, relieves the tedium of packing) but other than that..

[CarolineM 0]

and how long did that take you to type????

[Laura_and_IanM 0]

and how long did that take you to type????

Obviously you didn't get the point. I know its a message board. Did I say otherwise?? And my name isn't DUDE!!!

Edited July 17, 2006 by Laura_and_IanM

[CarolineM 0]

I don't expect the wars to stop, but I think we can stop personally attacking one another..that is what pm is for lol..

I will never get offended for someone stating an opinion that is opposite of my own.

A bit snippy for someone so tolerant.

[chri'stina 190]

One of the differences from when I joined is the number of members...from around 1000 to now over 24,000. When something grows 24 times bigger than it was, there will be more of everything. More jerks, more sweethearts, more trolls, more knowledgable people, and etc. That doesn't mean it's completely different, but it's different in the sense of how many people are jerks now, how many are nice, how many cause trouble, how many help people. It's just multiplied but that means more people are finding visa help on VJ and that's a good thing.

[Trumplestiltskin 5,791]

Seems pretty much the same to me - a few more trolls maybe now n again (and I like playing with trolls on occasion, relieves the tedium of packing) but other than that..

Pretty much all of us who solely participate in O/T are trolls after a fashion, myself included. But I agree with you that this particular part of the forum has become rather more hostile of late - with topics being hijacked as a way of carrying on with private dislikes rather than discussing things in a polite or respectful manner.

What's happening now is somewhat dispiriting - with people creating new ID's all over the shop and then hiding behind them to post offensive and racially inflammatory information, that they wouldn't post on their regular ID, or for that matter, say in public.

Its disgusting and seems to be intended to ostracise and otherwise insult members of this community who happen to be of a particular religious and ethnic persuasion. There's really no justification for that.

[Laura_and_IanM 0]

I don't expect the wars to stop, but I think we can stop personally attacking one another..that is what pm is for lol..

I will never get offended for someone stating an opinion that is opposite of my own.

A bit snippy for someone so tolerant.

LOL you read it how you want to. I wasn't getting snippy for you obviously reading my post wrong and taking it the wrong way. I wasn't directing it at you, it is directed at those that keep coming on here under alias names. I was getting snippy at the fact that you called me dude..the last time I checked I had all the female parts and in the right place. Now if you would like to carry on why don't you pm me like an adult?

[Ameristralian 0]

Same old stuff huh?

[CarolineM 0]

Because I have no desire nor need to PM you. We're just having a conversation. No need to go all covert. Dude is just an expression. Sorry it offends you. MAybe it's a southern thing? Dunno.

I totally understand your post. I'm not retarded. I was just commenting that it must have taken you AGES To type that...an awful lot of thought to a topic that's been talked about alot...it was just an opinion different than yours...which you'll NEVER be offended by.

SEAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Dude!!! Where have you been? What's going on?? I need an update!!!!!

Edited July 17, 2006 by karo112

[kisschick1976 0]

The internet, it's serious business!!!!

I've been around here for over 2 years, the only thing different from the old days is the people. Trolls are on every message board out there. when you ignore them they go away. plain and simple.

[Laura_and_IanM 0]

Because I have no desire nor need to PM you. We're just having a conversation. No need to go all covert. Dude is just an expression. Sorry it offends you. MAybe it's a southern thing? Dunno.

I totally understand your post. I'm not retarded. I was just commenting that it must have taken you AGES To type that...an awful lot of thought to a topic that's been talked about alot...it was just an opinion different than yours...which you'll NEVER be offended by.

LOL..actually it only took me about 10 minutes to type. And I never said you were retarded. Even if I did take a while to think about it....does it really matter? This thread wasn't started to personally attack anyone or what have you, but your retorts to me were more than stating your opinion....they were slagging me off in a way. If you feel the need to do that, then don't bother. The thread was meant to be peaceful and offer up some sort of suggestion on how we can all handle it collectively as a group. I am not here to offend anyone by any means. Nor was there any comment in startup of this thread where I belittled anyone. Perhaps you can take a better look at your response.

[Ameristralian 0]

Hi! Yeah I took a hiatus. I think I just got tired of the same stuff. Anyways, nothing too exciting to report, marriage is good, went to Colorado, they still have big hills out there. Bought an Imac, it rocks, my dog has a slight limp right now, and I still have my same job. There now, you're all caught up. Have I missed anything exciting? It was that silly 'thank you to all visajourney members' email from Ewok that brought me back here. I need to do a little bit of research as well.