Visits

[lindal24 1]

I'm not one to talk (because of my short engagement before I got married) but I think you should give it some time for your relationship to develop. Meeting on vacation for a few days and wanting to get married already? In the eyes of a CO, I think this would definately red flag your application. I'm sure what your feeling right off the bat is probably lust but once you allow some time for communication you will see your relationship turn to love for one another. If you undoubtedly love this person now go for it, but if you suspect any portion of my rant above to be true, just wait. So I say...give it some time. But I'm by no means a professional so apply or don't...just prepare yourself!

[vietazn 1]

OP,

The answer to your question depends on your specific situation. Are you two both still single and never been married/divorced before? How were you two introduced to each other? Any of her relatives living in the USA at the moment?

You see my drift? If your case has more complications, then you need to make more trips. More importantly, time the trips farther apart. You need to convince the CO that your trips are intended to "get to know" your s/o better and eventually lead to the decision to make her your life partner.

First trip= getting to know each other

Second trip= being introduced to her family. Getting to know each other more......etc

Third trip= Engagement

Fourth trip= timing this trip around a Holiday, like Christmas or Lunar New year. She's now your s/o. Prove it so to the CO.

Now is the right time to file your paperwork. Make sure doing your timeline properly and submit it with your initial paperwork.

The CO will never fall for that song "I'm so in loved with my lady. Therefore, I have to propose to her in less than 12 months of period since the initial acquaintance."

My 2©

This is good advice, but let your heart tell you what to do. Each case is different, I do not know many people that get over a month of vacation each year just to make 4 trips, and besides that if you already are in love, it would be heck waiting that long to even file for the visa. Also with the current american economy not many people can risk taking that much time off from work, so if you do go only one time, make it as long as humanly possible. I am lucky, or unlucky, the only reason I have been able to make this third trip and the second was because of a work injury. I am currently off on worker's comp waiting for surgery. But as I said, do what you can do, and then follow your heart, some people get buy with one trip, if they had to have 2 or 3 or even 4 then it would be a requirement for that many trips, also you have already met in person and you could actually already have filed for the K1 fiancee visa, you just have to have met 1 time within 2 years prior to filing for the k1 visa, and there is a loop hole around that rule. I do not know anyone personally that has used that loop hole and got a visa or let alone used it to file, but it is there for a reason. If your love is real and you make enough money you should be able to get her over here without any problems on a k1 visa. Good luck!

Jerome

Good point. It could be argued that someone young and working an 9-5 job, taking too many trips to Vietnam, is not normal. It could be suspicious or red flag. On the other hand, someone in the financial industry not taking another trip for fear of losing job would seem to be a plus. No one knows how they are going to being analyzed.

[Dau Que 6]

Instead of getting the blue slip at the interview for rushing to file the paperwork (obviously after that, both of you will lose time waiting for appealing, which in most K-1 cases will result in more denials anyway. Then getting there to marry her, which will cost you more time and $$$ in order to file the new CR1/K3 cases), you should be patient making more trips there to visit her.

By doing so, not only you allow time to get to know her better (not for your benefit, but to appeal to the CO), you increase your chance to obtain a pink slip for her. Remember, having made lots of trips to see her isn't a guarantee for a Pink slip, but it surely wouldn't guarantee you a Blue slip.

Do you want to go through the process of having a Blue slip and try to untangle the mess come with it? I hope you make your choice wisely while you still have a chance.

Edit to add: Search for and read a post by Anh Map in another topic in this thread. His remark is right on the dot "Marriage with VNese ladies is not intended for those who financially can't afford it......." This type of marriage will cost you a lot of money!!!

Edited September 29, 2009 by Dau Que

[Dau Que 6]

Sorry, it won't allow me to edit. Here's the correct link, see post #55 in that thread by Matt_Stevens

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...45&start=45

[lindal24 1]

I don't think it's the marriage that will cost alot of money (unless you're spending thousands on the reception afterwards--but it's still a HUGE savings if you had the same reception in the US) but more the money you'll be spending going back and forth waiting for the pink. I know that from personal experience... I've probably spent 5-8grand alone on travel expenses (including when we go on trips while I was in VN) in two years!!

[lindal24 1]

Good point. It could be argued that someone young and working an 9-5 job, taking too many trips to Vietnam, is not normal. It could be suspicious or red flag. On the other hand, someone in the financial industry not taking another trip for fear of losing job would seem to be a plus. No one knows how they are going to being analyzed.

I'm young (27) and work a 9-5 salary job...and I've taken 4 months vacation these last two years (Luckily I still have my job!). Maybe this could be another red flag??

I did explain this via an email I sent that I'm a hardworker and have incredible bosses...I also made sure the focus of the time off I took was to be with my husband.

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

Thank you guys. Great advice all around. One question though. If any of you have any experience with Yahoo Messenger. There is an option to Archive all of your conversations. I do have that option setup. But to make it easier to print these, I copy and paste the IM conversations between Thu and myself into a Microsoft Word document and save it there. Is this a good idea to do that? What I plan to do is, when I am ready to file the I-129F, I will print all the pages (I estimate over 1,000 pages by that time) and then I will print a short statement certifying that all the information in the conversations are true and to the best of my knowledge and then sign it and Thu sign it as well. How do you call that, a sworn affidavit or something? Is this a good idea or should I try something different?

BTW, Jerome for how long are you planning to visit VN next month?

<CARRICK>

There is no way the CO is going to read all that stuff. Print the logs, and then select a handful of the best sessions to print out over the course of time. You don't even have to print the complete chat sessions - just the stuff you think will help make your case that your relationship is legitimate. You don't want to overwhelm the CO with evidence. They've got, at most, a couple of minutes to look at that stuff. You don't want your best evidence buried in a pile of mundane chat. Cherry pick, and give them only the very best stuff. If you chat every day then you should still be able to provide dozens of pages the CO can choose from, and any page he chooses to read will be good stuff.

You can front load the petition with chats, if you like, but you generally don't need much front loaded evidence of an ongoing relationship. What you really need to front load is evidence that addresses any red flags in your case. This makes it much more difficult for the CO to use those red flags to deny your fiancee a visa. Save the chats for the interview.

I've heard the WackyB Yahoo archive viewer is a great tool. You can format, export, and print chat sessions and logs, including the emoticons (as well as the "secret" emoticons). It's only $10.

http://www.wackyb.co.nz/yahoo/archive_viewer/

The sworn statement is kinda silly. How can you possibly swear that everything spoken in a conversation is true? The only thing you need to swear is true is the timeline. HCM insists that the timeline be a "sworn, notarized statement".

[BinhJerome 14]

Thank you guys. Great advice all around. One question though. If any of you have any experience with Yahoo Messenger. There is an option to Archive all of your conversations. I do have that option setup. But to make it easier to print these, I copy and paste the IM conversations between Thu and myself into a Microsoft Word document and save it there. Is this a good idea to do that? What I plan to do is, when I am ready to file the I-129F, I will print all the pages (I estimate over 1,000 pages by that time) and then I will print a short statement certifying that all the information in the conversations are true and to the best of my knowledge and then sign it and Thu sign it as well. How do you call that, a sworn affidavit or something? Is this a good idea or should I try something different?

BTW, Jerome for how long are you planning to visit VN next month?

<CARRICK>

There is no way the CO is going to read all that stuff. Print the logs, and then select a handful of the best sessions to print out over the course of time. You don't even have to print the complete chat sessions - just the stuff you think will help make your case that your relationship is legitimate. You don't want to overwhelm the CO with evidence. They've got, at most, a couple of minutes to look at that stuff. You don't want your best evidence buried in a pile of mundane chat. Cherry pick, and give them only the very best stuff. If you chat every day then you should still be able to provide dozens of pages the CO can choose from, and any page he chooses to read will be good stuff.

You can front load the petition with chats, if you like, but you generally don't need much front loaded evidence of an ongoing relationship. What you really need to front load is evidence that addresses any red flags in your case. This makes it much more difficult for the CO to use those red flags to deny your fiancée a visa. Save the chats for the interview.

I've heard the WackyB Yahoo archive viewer is a great tool. You can format, export, and print chat sessions and logs, including the emoticons (as well as the "secret" emoticons). It's only $10.

http://www.wackyb.co.nz/yahoo/archive_viewer/

The sworn statement is kinda silly. How can you possibly swear that everything spoken in a conversation is true? The only thing you need to swear is true is the time line. HCM insists that the time line be a "sworn, notarized statement".

I totally disagree. I do not care if they are overwhelmed or not, if they have 2 minutes or 5 hours to look at the chat logs, it will be their choice what they look at no matter what, I say give them more than they can handle. No offense Jim, but as I said, there is no way I agree with that statement to give them what you think is important or will help, if you have a 2 year or 1 year relationship and you say that you chat all the time you need to prove it, but by taking only 1 day a week or so worth of chat logs looks to me like you were not to worried about talking with your loved one. I do like the input about WackyB, I wish I would have had that when we started our relationship. It would have made it easier to get all the chat logs together.

Either way you choose, as I said before do what your heart says. Jim does make a good point I will give him that the CO does not have tons of time to view everything, but if you have everything there or even if you have half of it there he will look at what he chooses to look at. On Binh's interview they did not even look at the chat logs, but they were there if he would have wanted them. Just remember this is our advice, choose what you want to do from our suggestions or do something that you think of yourself. Just do what you feel is right and then if good comes from it you are happy, and if bad comes from it, you know you did what you thought was right. If you do what we did you might get pink, or white, who knows, if you do what Linda says or John says, same thing it is a roll of the dice, so what ever you do, make sure that is what you want and not what we think you should do. Good luck Jerome and Binh

[Anh map 2,098]

I don't think it's the marriage that will cost alot of money (unless you're spending thousands on the reception afterwards--but it's still a HUGE savings if you had the same reception in the US) but more the money you'll be spending going back and forth waiting for the pink. I know that from personal experience... I've probably spent 5-8grand alone on travel expenses (including when we go on trips while I was in VN) in two years!!

It wasn't a reference to the cost of a wedding ceremony.

Rather the costs involved in the entire relationship/immigration journey.

[WeatherEmperor 21]

Wow thank you for all your help guys! Trust me when I say that I really appreciate your time and support. Thu and I are in agreement not to rush. Right now in our relationship, we are just taking our time to really get to know each others families. We started discussions about the engagement ceremony. We hope to do that in VN around January/February next year. Again, no rush. I see Thu and her parents on the Yahoo Messenger web cam almost daily now. I am 25 and she is 23. Neither of us have ever been married before. Also, neither of us have ever filed for a K-1 Visa or any type of immigration/fiance/spouse, you name it Visa. So I guess both of our records are clean. I hope that is a big plus for us.

QUESTION: Thu and I want to have an engagement ceremony in VN. Do you recommend that we do the ceremony before or after we file the I-129F petition? I would like to build our relationship as strong as possible before doing the I-129F because that way the USCIS can see so much of our strong relationship before it ever gets to HCMC consulate.

<CARRICK>

P.S- Sorry for asking so many questions

[ScottThuy 140]

Since you dont have a problem with waiting a bit.. Do the Dam Hoi and or the Dinh Hon before the filing and include some of those pics along with a timeline in the filing.. a great frontload IMO....

[WeatherEmperor 21]

Thanks Scott. I agree with you. I think that makes the most sense for Thu and I. Maybe we should just both relax and enjoy the relationship for now and file after the engagement. I see that you have the dam hoi for you and Thuy planned for November. How long will you be staying in VN? Any plans to return to VN early next year?

<CARRICK>

Since you dont have a problem with waiting a bit.. Do the Dam Hoi and or the Dinh Hon before the filing and include some of those pics along with a timeline in the filing.. a great frontload IMO....

[BinhJerome 14]

Scott is correct on his point. If you are not worried about waiting, do it before you file, and take photos and front load with them and make it a big part of your time line. Don't worry about asking to many questions, we have all been there or we are there right now.

Jerome

[ScottThuy 140]

Thanks Scott. I agree with you. I think that makes the most sense for Thu and I. Maybe we should just both relax and enjoy the relationship for now and file after the engagement. I see that you have the dam hoi for you and Thuy planned for November. How long will you be staying in VN? Any plans to return to VN early next year?

<CARRICK>

Since you dont have a problem with waiting a bit.. Do the Dam Hoi and or the Dinh Hon before the filing and include some of those pics along with a timeline in the filing.. a great frontload IMO....

I will be there for a week early Dec and then again for her interview for another week or so.. not sure when that will be because we are in NVC AP.

Document everything about the relationship starting now... Look at everything you do from the perspective of a CO and think about how it could be evidence down the road... pics with the family will go a long way...

[luckytxn 2,265]

Just take your time now and get to know her. The idea to go to Vietnam and have an engagement party is a bit much now but when I went as I said in my timeline that I sent in was to meet her family and if I still felt like we were compatible then we would have an engagement party and I come back to the states and file a 129F.

Make sure the timeline so far is looking like a relationship is developing along a certain trajectory toward a expected conclusion that is proper and right.