You moved to the U.S. to be with your SO

[JillA 2]

I think that's the thing. Having moved to a few different countries, when you are 'different' they don't expect you to know anything People hear your accent and they try to help you out!

Now i'm sure that's not true for all immigrants, especially if English is your second or third language and you are struggling with that a bit, however here we have a lot of immigrant organizations to help with things. Can you imagine if a Canadian showed up at an American immigrant center? - one of your should try that!

[Krikit 1,164]

Later, when I received the call from my father that he had cancer and needed help I moved back home. I lived on the couch at my grandmothers because I spent every dime I had to move home 9 days later. I was struck by an amazing sense of claustrophobia because the mountains were back and I was no longer used to them. Took me about 2 months to get over that feeling.

You know one thing that's changed with me.... at the beginning, when people find out you're from Canada, and they ask (seriously) ridiculously stupid questions like, "Do you get summer there", or "do you have to hunt for food", etc. it used to humour me.... I thought it was quite funny.... now, after almost a year, it really bothers me and almost offends me, that there are so many stupid, ignorant fools around

That one totally made me laugh out loud. I'd answer "Only in the grocery store."

Now i'm sure that's not true for all immigrants, especially if English is your second or third language and you are struggling with that a bit, however here we have a lot of immigrant organizations to help with things. Can you imagine if a Canadian showed up at an American immigrant center? - one of your should try that!

OMG, I'd love to be there if someone does it. I'll drive! lol

Edited September 30, 2009 by Krikit

[CDAgirlMI 51]

The statement "I gave up everything for this" is kinda immature to me.

I don't look at it as "giving up", but as change to life.

I don't see moving out of Canada & away from friends and family as "giving it up"....it'll always be there. You just won't see it as often.

To me, giving up means you're done with something.

[Sprailenes 47]

Well, I guess I am immature for missing my mother, my friends, and general familiarity and feeling like I did give it up.

I can't just go back home when I have the urge, it's a 10 hour trip. I gave up the ability to be able to just see my mother when I feel like it. I gave up seeing my friends on regular basis. I go back now and things aren't the same, I have missed out on a lot: weddings, funerals, baby showers. I would consider that giving it up.

You know I think a lot of people are seeing it as a negative thing, and that's fine. I don't always see it as a negative thing but just as a way of feeling. Everyone deals with this process differently and calling ones feelings "immature" just doesn't sit well with me.

Edited September 30, 2009 by Sprailenes

[Marilyn. 340]

The big difference here compared to most people is that I never had anyone here but me. Doing this with the K-1 or whatever, you have someone you came here to be with. So you are never alone and you always have someone that knows the area, knows where to go for this or that, can help with getting things done, has a place you can immediatly live at etc. Plus getting introduced to their friends etc takes a huge burden off of you having to do that.

On the other hand, the freedom issue is different as you probably don't want to be just going out every weekend night with new coworkers etc because you now have a spouse or soon to be one...

Warlord, your experience was def. different from most here which is cool. You had to really start over again in a big way and that takes a lot of guts.

I will say though to the above comment that for a lot of people, that's not exactly how it works. Most people's significant others pick up extra hours at work because their newly immigrated fiancee/spouse can't do so. My husband was working, as I mentioned early, and still works, 12-14 hours a day. By the time you wake up, spend that time at the restaurant, and come home, I didn't see him that much and he couldn't really help me. It's not like that for every one, of course, I'm sure certain people have their spouse giving them a huge helping hand.

Also, because he worked so much, he didn't have very many friends any more He worked a lot of nights and since that's when you typically go out, he had lost touch with most of his good friends..I latched on to his cousin who is now one of my best friends but I don't see him much since our move more west in the state.

I'm just making a point to say that what you described is kind of like the ideal situation, but I don;'t think it really happens that way half the time.

exactly.. my hubby worked the same shift he is working now when I first came here.. he would leave the house around 1pm and sometimes not get home till 4 or 5 am.. so about 95 % of the time I was by myself.. and I also didn't have a car so I was stuck at home..

Edited September 30, 2009 by Marilyn.

[raymaga 25]

My first few months were probably the easiest.... due to the fact that everything was new and seemed exciting.

I am finding it harder and harder the longer I am here. I have lived in the U.S. for 5 years now and I still miss my family and friends in Canada terribly. It definitely ISN'T the same when I go back to visit as it was when I lived there.

Thankfully, my husband and I plan to move back to Canada in about 6 years when my husband retires early.

On the positive side, I love the cheaper groceries, liquor, car insurance, etc.

I miss Tim Horton's terribly!!!

[JillA 2]

My first few months were probably the easiest.... due to the fact that everything was new and seemed exciting.

I am finding it harder and harder the longer I am here. I have lived in the U.S. for 5 years now and I still miss my family and friends in Canada terribly. It definitely ISN'T the same when I go back to visit as it was when I lived there.

Thankfully, my husband and I plan to move back to Canada in about 6 years when my husband retires early.

On the positive side, I love the cheaper groceries, liquor, car insurance, etc.

I miss Tim Horton's terribly!!!

You love the liqour here? I've had the opposite experience. I really miss the LCBO and Beer Store. The Beer Store sells beer, LCBO liqour. Here, I can never find coolers, etc. they are at the beer store I still cannot figure out where to buy my booze

[Marilyn. 340]

most every grocery store sells booze here...

[SapphireDreams 71]

The statement "I gave up everything for this" is kinda immature to me.

I don't look at it as "giving up", but as change to life.

I don't see moving out of Canada & away from friends and family as "giving it up"....it'll always be there. You just won't see it as often.

To me, giving up means you're done with something.

But see, that's the thing, whether you realize it or not.. you are done with Canada. For me, I quit my job that I love dearly, I moved out of my house, I do not get to go home whenever I feel like it and again I don't see my friends and family very often. It's not that we leave and don't look back, but we are essentially starting over as individuals. A lot of our identity comes from our surroundings. When we pick up and leave, we give up everything we have and move to a new place with new people, surroundings and opportunities. It's not necessary a negative thing. We are making the choice and recognizing that we are starting again... but that doesn't make it any easier.

Heck, I moved to a phenomenal city, with my amazing husband. I love my new life, A LOT. But, there will always be a part of me that misses and longs to go back to my old life back in Canada.

I don't know, before I moved the anticipation was so exciting. I had a chance to start over and start my life. That's all I thought about day and night until I moved. I think it really overshadowed the fact that I was leaving behind my Canadian roots, my family, my friends. I was so excited for the future that I guess I didn't anticipate the emotions that also come from leaving.

I will say it over and over. You can't really know the feeling until you say your last goodbye and make your way into customs. It's a surreal and overwhelming experience that I will never forget. It taught me a lot about myself and how much I took things at home for granted.

[SapphireDreams 71]

My first few months were probably the easiest.... due to the fact that everything was new and seemed exciting.

I am finding it harder and harder the longer I am here. I have lived in the U.S. for 5 years now and I still miss my family and friends in Canada terribly. It definitely ISN'T the same when I go back to visit as it was when I lived there.

Thankfully, my husband and I plan to move back to Canada in about 6 years when my husband retires early.

On the positive side, I love the cheaper groceries, liquor, car insurance, etc.

I miss Tim Horton's terribly!!!

You love the liqour here? I've had the opposite experience. I really miss the LCBO and Beer Store. The Beer Store sells beer, LCBO liqour. Here, I can never find coolers, etc. they are at the beer store I still cannot figure out where to buy my booze

I agree it's hard to find stuff, BUT it is SO much cheaper here!! A bottle of wine is like $6! For a decent bottle too! A bottle of vodka is a steal!! The LCBO totally jacks up the price.

[Marilyn. 340]

booze is hard to find here? it is sold everywhere..lol Walmart even sells booze..

yeah there isn't a specific store that sells just booze, well there is BevMo but I am not sure if that is nationwide or not... but like I said you can find booze anywhere..

[Sprailenes 47]

PA is much like Ontario, they have a liquor control board.

[JillA 2]

most every grocery store sells booze here...

Not in PA, that would be nice. I miss Quebec for that same reason

[Marilyn. 340]

most every grocery store sells booze here...

Not in PA, that would be nice. I miss Quebec for that same reason

ok, I just assumed that every state was the same...

[redmen99 1]

PA is much like Ontario, they have a liquor control board.

This is true, but they are starting to sell beer in certain supermarkets, but under bar rules, which means you can purchase up to 2 six packs at a time. So if you need more, you take your purchase to the car and go back in for more. There is one market by me in Lansdale that has that, and I got a flyer in the mail recently about a Wegmans opening up in Collegeville soon that will have a restaurant where you can buy beer to drink in the store and I believe for take out as well.

Right around the corner from where I live I have a "drive through" beer distributor. I took the hubby through it once and he just looked like a little kid at Christmas. You mean you just tell them what you want, they go get it and put it in the car for you, you pay and leave and there's no line? REALLY? That's so cool! All I could say is, um yeah and I looked at him like he had 3 heads. Then I realized I grew up with places like this and since Ontario has nothing even remotely like this its going to be new and different for him. So now when he gets like that I just smile, chuckle a bit, wink at him and call him a nutbar.

Edited September 30, 2009 by redmen99