Need advice ASAP...divorce after husband arriving here

[Svetlana 0]

a) Is the marriage entered into in Russia considered to be legal in the US?

B) What steps need to be done in the US in order to get a divorce

[Otto 83]

a) Is the marriage entered into in Russia considered to be legal in the US?

Yes

B) What steps need to be done in the US in order to get a divorce

Varies by state.

[R and F 34]

I don't understand this at all. Really I don't, I was reading your past posts and only understand that he just got his visa.

And you are asking about a divorce already? I am confused on this.

Edited September 21, 2009 by R and F

[Chica Yeyé 41]

This is confusing. Your husband was just approved for a CR-1 visa in August and now wants a divorce???

[Svetlana 0]

I don't understand this at all. Really I don't, I was reading your past posts and only understand that he just got his visa.

And you are asking about a divorce already? I am confused on this.

He came to USA August 14th 2009. We were waiting for a year to be togeather,

Now he has Green Card, SS# and all of this was a huge mistake!!!

For whole year he didn't learn one word of English, I can't put him to any job, even cleaning...

I can't afford our life (I lost fancy job last year). He is handeling this situation like a crybaby.

I am soooo upset, I want my life back...

[Otto 83]

I am soooo upset, I want my life back...

Can understand that - the marriage is recognized in the US so you would file for divorce the same as you would had he been a US citizen.

[Svetlana 0]

I am soooo upset, I want my life back...

Can understand that - the marriage is recognized in the US so you would file for divorce the same as you would had he been a US citizen.

Thank you.

[Chica Yeyé 41]

Exactly - you can file for divorce following the guidelines for your state.

[Deputy Purple 1,294]

He came to USA August 14th 2009. We were waiting for a year to be togeather,

Now he has Green Card, SS# and all of this was a huge mistake!!!

For whole year he didn't learn one word of English, I can't put him to any job, even cleaning...

I can't afford our life (I lost fancy job last year). He is handeling this situation like a crybaby.

I am soooo upset, I want my life back...

Wow,

I hope you realize that you're just as much to blame as he is for your current problems.

Let's look at the problems:

1. He didn't learn a single word of English in 1 year. Okay, lazy on his part but what about you? Did you encourage communications in English? Before I found my wife I had a couple of Chinese girlfriends who spoke varying amounts of English (one in the US one in Canada, the Canadian spoke more English FWIW). I spent a lot of time helping them improve their English skills and it was a great relationship builder. Even with my wife who speaks good English I spend some time helpign her improve it.

2. Regarding his job, of course you can find him work that doesn't require English. Look within your local Ukrainian/Russian community and you will find many resources that will get him cleaning offices after hours or loading trucks on a dock with other non-english speaking immigrants.

3. You can't afford your current lifestyle AND you want your old life back. This is the reality of Marriage. If you Love him and he Loves then together you guys should be able to work through the tough times and in the end your relationship will make you stronger as a couple.

4. He's handling the problems like a crybaby. Well remember that he is in a foriegn land and doesn't speak the language. His life has been turned upside down and he is completely lost in the translation. Have some patience with THE MAN YOU LOVE. You are 90% of his life right now and the fact that you're ready to throw him out with the trash isn't going to fix anything.

Finally, don't forget you signed an Affidavit of Support promising to be financially responsible for him for the next 10 years, divorce doesn't erase that promise to the US Government.

[Lona.C. 16]

am not sure if this is the same for russia as it is for germany , but when I got divorced in canada from my ex ,

I had to get a seal from canadien gov and send it to germany so they where able to legalize the divorce in germany and close the file there too ( had I not done that my now marriage in the US could have been voided ,

since Germany was the place where we got married

so if russia has simial laws when you got married there , I would contact the russia consulate and see if the divorce is finalized by international law if you get it here in US and you got married in russia

[Svetlana 0]

He came to USA August 14th 2009. We were waiting for a year to be togeather,

Now he has Green Card, SS# and all of this was a huge mistake!!!

For whole year he didn't learn one word of English, I can't put him to any job, even cleaning...

I can't afford our life (I lost fancy job last year). He is handeling this situation like a crybaby.

I am soooo upset, I want my life back...

Wow,

I hope you realize that you're just as much to blame as he is for your current problems.

Let's look at the problems:

1. He didn't learn a single word of English in 1 year. Okay, lazy on his part but what about you? Did you encourage communications in English? Before I found my wife I had a couple of Chinese girlfriends who spoke varying amounts of English (one in the US one in Canada, the Canadian spoke more English FWIW). I spent a lot of time helping them improve their English skills and it was a great relationship builder. Even with my wife who speaks good English I spend some time helpign her improve it.

2. Regarding his job, of course you can find him work that doesn't require English. Look within your local Ukrainian/Russian community and you will find many resources that will get him cleaning offices after hours or loading trucks on a dock with other non-english speaking immigrants.

3. You can't afford your current lifestyle AND you want your old life back. This is the reality of Marriage. If you Love him and he Loves then together you guys should be able to work through the tough times and in the end your relationship will make you stronger as a couple.

4. He's handling the problems like a crybaby. Well remember that he is in a foriegn land and doesn't speak the language. His life has been turned upside down and he is completely lost in the translation. Have some patience with THE MAN YOU LOVE. You are 90% of his life right now and the fact that you're ready to throw him out with the trash isn't going to fix anything.

Finally, don't forget you signed an Affidavit of Support promising to be financially responsible for him for the next 10 years, divorce doesn't erase that promise to the US Government.

I really try to help with English, I sent him to Community College for classes, 2 my american men/friends are coming to my house weekly to spend 2 hours with him.

There is no any Russian community here to help with work.

I went with him everywhere - no job for non English speaking person.

I am not sure if I love him any more after saw note book with his list of food what he ate,

to show me he doesn't eat much. Now he stop eating and last night spent in garage.

This is a man???? I have a high blood presure and that why I need my life back, calm and quiet.

I didn't see love in his eyes iser.

It's all so sad! I guess 1 year video chat reletion is not enoufg for merriage.

[Chica Yeyé 41]

OK, so if you both have decided to divorce, what is stopping you?

[Svetlana 0]

OK, so if you both have decided to divorce, what is stopping you?

Nothing.

My question to this forum was do I have to do divorce here if I went top Ruassia to marry him?

I get answer "yes". Thank you all for advises.

It's very very hard to kick someone from US, but he always told me he doesn't care about America, so I hope it will be not so painful for him

[Chica Yeyé 41]

OK, so if you both have decided to divorce, what is stopping you?

Nothing.

My question to this forum was do I have to do divorce here if I went top Ruassia to marry him?

I get answer "yes". Thank you all for advises.

It's very very hard to kick someone from US, but he always told me he doesn't care about America, so I hope it will be not so painful for him

You can divorce him here.

Now, you cannot "kick him out" of the US. The only thing you can do is divorce him; he might file for Removing Conditions on his own.

[rika60607 215]

It is hard to adjust to a completely new environment at that age for most people. I feel very sorry for him.

If he wants to go back to Russia, he can and he can file for divorce there, too.

You can write and notarize a letter giving a power of attorney to a friend or relative of yours in Russia - that way they can file for divorce instead of you. 30 days later you write another notarized letter to authorize divorce and you have your divorce compete.

Divorce is more costly and lengthy in the US.

It seems that it was a costly mistake, for both of you. I'd give him another chance though - how can you expect to see love in his eyes when he's feeling so low that he counts the food he's eating to show you that he does not cost you much... poor man.

We are both 54 1/2, and this exectly what I want from him...grow up!

I am at work all day then I have an other job at home...I have bo time to deal with a crybaby

Right now he is still upset and watching TV (Russian, not American to get some new words og=f English!)