Another HCMC black eye

[BinhJerome 14]

Love is blind. My first marriage to a doctor failed miserably simply because we approach the life differently. She dissed everything Viet, worshiped the American way of life while I tend to favor Viet culture more. Nonetheless, I loved her once. With my wife now, I never ever thought of the possibility of marrying anyone in Vietnam but it was love that brought us together. This December will mark 5 years of our marriage and our son will turn 3 soon and until today, I still don't know how I could possibly fall in love for someone who was half way around the globe. All I know is I took a chance. So did my wife. She had a very successful restaurant in Vietnam, made more than "enough" and she had met many Viet Kieu before me. I have a solid great job, professional by day, bachelor by night but somehow our destinies crossed path. I now trade my party nights for quite nights with my son and my wife gather around the living room laughing over comedy skits on TV. She traded her lucrative but always busy business for a very simple job with much less money at the nail salon but more quite and happiness. So I guess our 50/50 chance turned out favorably for us. We either made it or break it. Simple as that. So guys, don't doubt. Don't worry about what others say. You live your life they way you see fit. Just love and treasure what you have. Everyone has intentions, good or bad but it is all about the betterment of their lives. We are here to lend hand of support for each other. The bickering does us no good. Let's focus to the matter at hand ... that is getting that PINK

great post, and I am very happy for the three of you.

Jerome

[Anh map 2,098]

I'm not trying to persuade all of you that all Vietnamese brides came to US are in truthful marriage, but if your guys didn't believe them, why don't your guys come to Vietnam to live with them to avoid scammers coming to your country? Hummm, I like that idea.

I should ask him to come to VN so I didn't have to give up my house, my University degree and my good job to come to the USA to work in McDonald restaurant to look for money to came back to school. I had to start over everything.

You chose the wrong ones by yourselves and now complain for all of the brides.

What in the world are you talking about?

Nothing posted prior to your post was complaining about being scammed.

And no one is indicting Vietnamese women.

And all of the posters in this entire thread seem to be quite happy with their choices.

Anh Map, I felt frustrating because of many posts in two threads, specially in the thread of Calilove, then it appears another thread that said about this story again. Do you think it's two cases or one? That why I said so.

I knew why your guys got scammers, I used to work in 4-star-hotel in Saigon. I understood what would happen, however, I couldnot let it go when you guys said bad things about all Vietnamese brides.

As you all said, it's risky to get a Vietnamese brides, if you knew so why were you not carefully? I feel sad to read these posts.

I'm planning to return to VN for our life later. I'm trying to think out some kind of business or jobs for my husband and me to settle our life in VN when we got old enough in retirement time.

Who are you talking about? No one here is complaining about their wives/fiancees/girlfriends. We are SUPPORTING the honest and true women (and men) of Vietnam.

The point of the original post (by me) was to show another story that makes all of us connected with family immigration from Vietnam look bad. And it is frustrating to have our loved ones seen a scammers just because others before (men and women) have not been honest.

Those people coming after us need to work harder to overcome the bad stories so that they can live together in the US if that is their choice. And it's important for those just starting to see that the path is more difficult because of the bad people abusing the system in the past.

[lindal24 1]

Anh Map, I felt frustrating because of many posts in two threads, specially in the thread of Calilove, then it appears another thread that said about this story again. Do you think it's two cases or one? That why I said so.

I knew why your guys got scammers, I used to work in 4-star-hotel in Saigon. I understood what would happen, however, I couldnot let it go when you guys said bad things about all Vietnamese brides.

As you all said, it's risky to get a Vietnamese brides, if you knew so why were you not carefully? I feel sad to read these posts.

I'm planning to return to VN for our life later. I'm trying to think out some kind of business or jobs for my husband and me to settle our life in VN when we got old enough in retirement time.

Its 2 cases.. Cali girl came back Sunday.. This guy similar thing but some differences happened this weekend...

Nobody is saying bad things about all VN brides... It is the few sneaky ones that make everyone wonder about the rest...

When you find a good business .. let me know I want to go there and retire also...

My friend was telling me that she has a friend who after she got all the paperwork for her husband done here in the states, they ended up going back to VN to live. Her friend imports electronics into VN and sells at a major retail store. They are happy and healthy and make an annual trip to the US to renew their paperwork...just an idea...

[ScottThuy 140]

I am surprised there is good money in that with the duty on technology coming into the country...

[lindal24 1]

Love is blind. My first marriage to a doctor failed miserably simply because we approach the life differently. She dissed everything Viet, worshiped the American way of life while I tend to favor Viet culture more. Nonetheless, I loved her once. With my wife now, I never ever thought of the possibility of marrying anyone in Vietnam but it was love that brought us together. This December will mark 5 years of our marriage and our son will turn 3 soon and until today, I still don't know how I could possibly fall in love for someone who was half way around the globe. All I know is I took a chance. So did my wife. She had a very successful restaurant in Vietnam, made more than "enough" and she had met many Viet Kieu before me. I have a solid great job, professional by day, bachelor by night but somehow our destinies crossed path. I now trade my party nights for quite nights with my son and my wife gather around the living room laughing over comedy skits on TV. She traded her lucrative but always busy business for a very simple job with much less money at the nail salon but more quite and happiness. So I guess our 50/50 chance turned out favorably for us. We either made it or break it. Simple as that. So guys, don't doubt. Don't worry about what others say. You live your life they way you see fit. Just love and treasure what you have. Everyone has intentions, good or bad but it is all about the betterment of their lives. We are here to lend hand of support for each other. The bickering does us no good. Let's focus to the matter at hand ... that is getting that PINK

That sounds like me and my husband's story...in the sense that I never in my entire life imagined myself marrying someone from Vietnam, much less Vietnamese. He said the same thing...that he never imagined marrying a Viet Kieu...lol. We've exchanged our stories/positions, but it was destiny, family values, and religion in the end that brought us together!

Edited September 20, 2009 by lindal24

[vietazn 1]

Spoke with several other Vietnamese people about the fiance visa process. We are of the opinion that the process would be better if there were two different channels: one for couples with one or both who have already been married, and one for couples with neither married. Couples with previous marriages should not clog up the channels because their application demands more scrutiny, and plus they have already had their chance in marriage. Too bad this is not the presidential election cycle because I would like to personally ask Mitt Romney his opinion on this issue because he has made family values the central portion of his campaign.

[BinhJerome 14]

Spoke with several other Vietnamese people about the fiancé visa process. We are of the opinion that the process would be better if there were two different channels: one for couples with one or both who have already been married, and one for couples with neither married. Couples with previous marriages should not clog up the channels because their application demands more scrutiny, and plus they have already had their chance in marriage. Too bad this is not the presidential election cycle because I would like to personally ask Mitt Romney his opinion on this issue because he has made family values the central portion of his campaign.

I do not know if I understand you correctly. But if I did, I totally disagree. America is land of the free. If a person wants to get married more than once he should have that option, I think if they had separate channels, that this would just slow down the entire process even further because there might be breaks in one channel and the other over flowing. I just think they need to have more co's and they need to get one case done at a time instead of putting half or more on ap then on ap again. If they truly need more time then that is fine, but half of these cases could be straightened out with one or two questions or phone calls. They just do not want to do it or they truly do not have the time to do it. I prefer to think they are just taking their sweet time and enjoying playing god with the countless peoples lives that come in front of them.

Jerome

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

Is that garage cleaned out yet???????

Haha! Yeah, it's cleaned out, and I've got my shop moved into it. I was strongly motivated to finish quickly - it costs $450 per week to rent a 14 foot dumpster!

Actually, if you get a job with an American or international company they compensate you based on their standards of living (for the most part) Living in VN, you'd have a low cost of living and can make potentially 30,000+ in residual income to pay off debt and etc. you leave in the US. This is a great way to pay off that very quickly!

I've looked into it, just in case it becomes a necessity. I could possibly get a job in my field making about 1/3 what I'm currently making in the US, working as a remote employee for a Japanese company. I would live extremely well by VN standards, and have a residual income higher than $30K, but it would still not be enough to keep my home in the US and support my family. I live in Northern California, where even middle class homes are very expensive. I still owe nearly $600K on my mortgage. If I end up having to move to Vietnam then I'll walk away from the mortgage and let the bank have the house. (If my mortgage lender is reading this then they're probably calling the consulate right now to beg them to give us a visa! )

Otherwise, I plan to keep paying on the house to preserve my credit rating. I should be back into positive equity again within a couple of years. When I retire in 15 or 20 years, I'll sell the home and keep whatever equity I've got, and Phuong and I will live in Vietnam on my retirement and social security income. By that time, she'll be a USC so we'll be able to travel freely back and forth.

Spoke with several other Vietnamese people about the fiance visa process. We are of the opinion that the process would be better if there were two different channels: one for couples with one or both who have already been married, and one for couples with neither married. Couples with previous marriages should not clog up the channels because their application demands more scrutiny, and plus they have already had their chance in marriage. Too bad this is not the presidential election cycle because I would like to personally ask Mitt Romney his opinion on this issue because he has made family values the central portion of his campaign.

I'm not sure what you think this would accomplish. There is one form of visa scam where the intending immigrant recently divorced, and intends to play the USC for a green card, divorce them, and then petition for their ex-spouse in Vietnam. There is another variation where the USC is in on the scam, and recently divorced so they could marry the intending immigrant to help them immigrate, usually because they are being paid to do so. The common factor between these is the recent divorce, and not necessarily the previous marriage. It's just as likely that an unmarried visa scammer would have a boyfriend or girlfriend waiting in the wings.

But these are not the most common sort of visa scam. The most common visa scammer is a young unmarried girl who just dreams of escaping the poverty of Vietnam.

Scott made a pretty good list of red flags that might raise suspicions that the applicant is visa scammer. A recently divorced beneficiary would match at least one item on that list. A young girl eager to leave Vietnam would probably match several others - she may have previous failed attempts to immigrate, she may not be making a sincere effort to learn English, she may frequently have excuses for not being able to communicate with her USC fiance (in reality, she's just not interested), she may insist on quitting her job and getting regular cash payments from her fiance, etc.

Another point that might also be added to Scott's list is a couple who are very obviously mismatched. A 50'ish American man going through a mid-life crisis would probably be thrilled to have a 20'ish Vietnamese sex toy, and a young VN girl intent on getting out of Vietnam would happily marry Godzilla if it would get her a green card.

[ScottThuy 140]

I'm not sure what you think this would accomplish. There is one form of visa scam where the intending immigrant recently divorced, and intends to play the USC for a green card, divorce them, and then petition for their ex-spouse in Vietnam. There is another variation where the USC is in on the scam, and recently divorced so they could marry the intending immigrant to help them immigrate, usually because they are being paid to do so. The common factor between these is the recent divorce, and not necessarily the previous marriage. It's just as likely that an unmarried visa scammer would have a boyfriend or girlfriend waiting in the wings.

But these are not the most common sort of visa scam. The most common visa scammer is a young unmarried girl who just dreams of escaping the poverty of Vietnam.

Scott made a pretty good list of red flags that might raise suspicions that the applicant is visa scammer. A recently divorced beneficiary would match at least one item on that list. A young girl eager to leave Vietnam would probably match several others - she may have previous failed attempts to immigrate, she may not be making a sincere effort to learn English, she may frequently have excuses for not being able to communicate with her USC fiance (in reality, she's just not interested), she may insist on quitting her job and getting regular cash payments from her fiance, etc.

Another point that might also be added to Scott's list is a couple who are very obviously mismatched. A 50'ish American man going through a mid-life crisis would probably be thrilled to have a 20'ish Vietnamese sex toy, and a young VN girl intent on getting out of Vietnam would happily marry Godzilla if it would get her a green card.

I just heard about a guy at the consulate the other day that looked to be in his 80's and the SO was maybe 20. hmmm red flag you say?

[lindal24 1]

Another point that might also be added to Scott's list is a couple who are very obviously mismatched. A 50'ish American man going through a mid-life crisis would probably be thrilled to have a 20'ish Vietnamese sex toy, and a young VN girl intent on getting out of Vietnam would happily marry Godzilla if it would get her a green card.

Forgot about the whole age card...thats another god one...I did read in a celebrity magazine column somewhere that young asian beauties are the new trophy wives... :oP

Edited September 21, 2009 by lindal24

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

I just heard about a guy at the consulate the other day that looked to be in his 80's and the SO was maybe 20. hmmm red flag you say?

Red flag? Yeah, maybe about like THIS!

Forgot about the whole age card...thats another god one...I did read in a celebrity magazine column somewhere that young asian beauties are the new trophy wives... :oP

My fiancee is 43. Does that mean I get the runner-up plaque instead of the trophy?

[luckytxn 2,264]

I better go try to make my much younger wife more happy somehow. She got her Green card about a month ago

[lindal24 1]

My fiancee is 43. Does that mean I get the runner-up plaque instead of the trophy?

Wow...she looks great for 43!!

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

My fiancee is 43. Does that mean I get the runner-up plaque instead of the trophy?

Wow...she looks great for 43!!

In all fairness, we got up at 3:30 am so the makeup artist could work on her. We got to the temple at 5:30 am for the ceremony. But even without the makeup, I think she's gorgeous (I'm biased, of course). When we left for the party that afternoon, she was in her gown and I was in my tux, we got off the elevator and everyone in the hotel lobby gasped when they saw her - and then they started to applaud. My sister said she thought she was with "Branjolina"!

[Josephs 0]

In fact, I can't think of a single aspect of living in Vietnam that would be better than living in the US.

ill have to disagree.

(her) family, Food, Friends. also The life style. Family in VN is a big big deal. hell that's the 2nd most thing I look forward to when I go to VN. (1st of course is my fiancee) and the food is amazing, things just don't taste the same here in the USA. maybe its the atmosphere or temperature. I don't know but as for life it self maybe you wont be as healthy or as worldly knowledgeable but you will have great people around you always. if I had to be envious of my fiancee for any reason, that would be it. The huge tight nit family, everyone helping each other. you just don't see that in USA. That was one thing that clicked for Phi and I. we both had the same morals and wants in life. So if you are scared about fraud its ok. but don't let your fear hinder your life!

Remember: " 'Tis better to have loved and lost Than never to have loved at all." -Alfred Lord Tennyson 1850

Personally I would rather go through heartbreak than never have known my fiancee. She is the most wonderful person in the world, and there is no1 on this planet like her.