Happy Thursday MENA!

[amal 4]

I think the most important is don't expect too much right away. Don't expect everyone (kids, husband & you) to be bffs right away and if everything is smooth at first just prepare that things may come up later. Talk to your kids...really important. Ask them what they expect and what you expect as far as respect for your husband, the fact that he may not "get" slang or certain cultural things (dating, music, tv shows, friendships, sleep overs, etc.), prepare them for sleeping arrangements esp your little guy, this may seem small but, prep them for his accent (weird but even my kids having an Arab dad thought the husband's accent was funny), etc. Kids may think the accent is cute or funny but if they laugh about it, it may make your husband uncomfortable or insecure. Be sensitive about religious needs ie halal foods, washing up after using the toilet, perhaps animals in the home, shoe removal prior to entering the home, etc. These things may seem small but to some Arabs it's huge. Will you be getting him a cell phone? Will you do a family share plan? Explain these things since share plans are uncommon in Egypt. Can he drive? If not, will you be teaching him? Even if he can drive you'll still have to teach him about our rules of the road. Will he used public transportation? Get maps and bus schedules. He'll have to learn currency if he doesn't know already. I taped coins to paper and labled the coins and the amounts for my husband to practice. Take things as slowly as he wants. Honestly, it's like you're bringing a child here (if he hasn't been abroad before). You have to be very patient. Perhaps look into Arabic satellite channels but we aware...you'll be watching lots of Arabic shows so I hope you have more than one TV..hehe. But yeah prep your kids, really prep them even with small details. That will help them a lot. I believe they are the most affected and they're the most sensitive.

Best of luck!

Ladies I need ALLLLL YOUR TIPS. I am scared to death! LOL. Just tell me everything and anything you think would be helpful!

That's exactly what I would have said too Astarte. Nothing can prepare you for their arrival. Patience, patience, patience, and oh..did I mention patience? Remember NOT to spoil him in his first weeks coz it will cause problems later. It's going to be an adjustment. Some adjustments are smooth and some are gravel filled with pot holes, floods, hurricaines, and all that mother nature can throw at them. Take everything 1 day at a time and realize that some of the most minor things to you can be some of the largest obsticles to him.

And lastly....don't be afraid to talk to a friend about issues. Someone who is in the same kind of relationship is very very very very helpful to remind you that your relationship issues are not much different than anybody elses (who are in our boat).

Morning Mena! Blood pressure is still sky rocketed out of this world. 171/105. Waiting for the doctor to call back with test results from yesterday. I wish this darn headache would go away. I'm afraid to do anything, I'm in stroke territory. This is scary! Say a prayer for me please, I don't ask for much for myself but I am frightened.

Terry, take care of yourself girl. Plz let me know the results of the test. I'm here prayin' for ya!!

[ya falaha! 0]

^^^^ To add to this...don't post major drama on VJ! Find a friend or two (RL or from here) to vent to. Can't stress that enough.

[nurse1967 287]

I am trying to schedule some time off as well. Hubby's flight is scheduled to arrive at 4:09. My kids and I and my sister and her husband will meet him at the airport. What I am hoping is that I can talk my mom and dad into making a nice dinner while we are at the airport at my house. That way his first meal will be memorable. My mom is a great cook. It would be a relaxed way for everyone to get acquainted.

[doodlebugg 10]

sweet potato fries, never had them, but not a fan of the sweet potato but maybe they taste good fried, in the south we love to fry everything. lol

Are you with hubby now? I was trying to figure out if you're in Dubai or like someone said the other day in Iraq?

Morning everyone. Booked hubby's airline ticket last night. He will be here with me on October 14th. I am soooooo nervous!!! LOL

Morning Mena! Blood pressure is still sky rocketed out of this world. 171/105. Waiting for the doctor to call back with test results from yesterday. I wish this darn headache would go away. I'm afraid to do anything, I'm in stroke territory. This is scary! Say a prayer for me please, I don't ask for much for myself but I am frightened.

Oh my, I hope everything is ok. Honestly if the headache doesn't go away with some tyelnol I would call the doc again and tell him/her that you are thinking of going to the ER. I wouldn't mess around with a headache + high bp.

I am trying to schedule some time off as well. Hubby's flight is scheduled to arrive at 4:09. My kids and I and my sister and her husband will meet him at the airport. What I am hoping is that I can talk my mom and dad into making a nice dinner while we are at the airport at my house. That way his first meal will be memorable. My mom is a great cook. It would be a relaxed way for everyone to get acquainted.

Not to be nosey but is there anyway someone can take the kids for a few days? I met my husband at the airport alone, then went home and we spent the rest of that evening/night alone together. The next morning my ex's wife brought my kids to the house for like 1/2 hour to meet him which was cool since he brought tons of presents for them. Then they went back to my ex since it was his weekend and we were all united that Monday night. It gave him a chance to breath and take it all in, you know? Plus it gave us some very much needed alone time and I was relaxed about the kids since their initial meeting already happened.

I'm so addicted to these Japanese rice cracker spicey snacks that they have at our cafeteria. They're wicked crunchy and fat free!

Edited September 17, 2009 by doodlebugg

[ya falaha! 0]

If your parents could take the kids for the night that would also be helpful.

I am trying to schedule some time off as well. Hubby's flight is scheduled to arrive at 4:09. My kids and I and my sister and her husband will meet him at the airport. What I am hoping is that I can talk my mom and dad into making a nice dinner while we are at the airport at my house. That way his first meal will be memorable. My mom is a great cook. It would be a relaxed way for everyone to get acquainted.

[ya falaha! 0]

Wanted to add... I agree with doodle's advice about having an intro then maybe having the kids spend a day or two with dad (if he's around) or grandparents. We did the same. Husband got here late Wed night, the kids stayed with dad until Friday after school then we got them and went out to dinner and got acquainted. I gotta admit I'm so glad those "new" days are over regarding the kids. First adjustments are awkward. I'm so glad to be at the stage we are now where the kids love him (esp my oldest who says he's "the best stepdad ever") and are accustomed to him.

[nurse1967 287]

Neither of my kid's dads are involved and unfortunately even though my parents are close in proximity they only have a one bedroom condo so that rules them out. Oh well we will muddle through. My husband is very very understanding and laid back so I think it will be ok. Besides, the kids will have school the next morning so we will have the day to ourselves.

[doodlebugg 10]

Wanted to add... I agree with doodle's advice about having an intro then maybe having the kids spend a day or two with dad (if he's around) or grandparents. We did the same. Husband got here late Wed night, the kids stayed with dad until Friday after school then we got them and went out to dinner and got acquainted. I gotta admit I'm so glad those "new" days are over regarding the kids. First adjustments are awkward. I'm so glad to be at the stage we are now where the kids love him (esp my oldest who says he's "the best stepdad ever") and are accustomed to him.

ME too!!!!! My 12 yr old told me she misses him the other day. Since his work doesn't start until 4 normally unless he's on the morning shift he would be home when she came home from school and they'd talk or just chill out together. Most times he would have walked about a mile to CVS to get her some chocolate for when she got home. They're special buddies.

[doodlebugg 10]

Do Casinos have Farkle as a game? I used to go to the casinos when we'd be in Aruba and I was always too nervous to play blackjack or any of the table games but Farkle I think I could handle!

[a1angied 0]

Turia my prayers are with you and I pray that the Dr calls with some relief for you as well.

Besty well I remember the home coming and it was crazy to prepare for and great once it was here. It is a wild ride and one i will never forget and pray I will never experience again. Ok well let me correct that cos parts of it well I pray I experience over and over again.

As for me today I get to go to the dentist and have a deep cleaning and 4 fillings replaced and a couple of minor repairs all to be done in one setting. I am a chicken at the dentist and said if you can numb my whole mouth for the cleaning then do all the other work I knw that it will all be done cos not sure if I would come back if you hurt me, I will forget after 6 months when it comes time to get another check up. LOL

Edited September 17, 2009 by a1angied

[amal 4]

Moody, you're absolutely right! I'm horrible about not saying anything for a while and then 'sploding all over the place in a "let's just kill him and get it over with" thread. It will only come back to bite you if you post it "out loud" so find a close friend you can either talk to in person or via phone..email..anything..but try not to post problems in the forums.

I also had my son stay at his grandparents house the first night. Great suggestion Doods!

[morocco4ever 63]

Hey Betsy, I don't know your husbands personality, but my husband is a bit shy. Because I knew he would be exhausted from the long flight I decided to pick him up myself and bring him home to an empty house to let him get rested and adjust a little before we did the big welcome with the family. I know for him he was grateful, but this really depends more on his personality. Just make sure to ask him first what he would prefer and give him what makes him more comfortable. This is a huge thing for him, don't want to overwhelm him.

[LaL 418]

^^ ditto these. Best suggestion would be to not overwhelm.

[ya falaha! 0]

Double ditto with M4E's comment. Big family dinners should maybe wait for a few days. I went with a gf to pick up my husband cuz I was nervous and excited and didn't want to drive but she kept quiet during the ride home. She dropped us off to an empty apartment so we could get reacquainted. It had been 9 months since we'd seen each other. I had cooked a little something prior to the pick up so he had something to eat which he didn't eat till the next day cuz he was jetlagged and all that.

[nurse1967 287]

Guys thanks for all the tips. I am going to be in a tailspin for these next few weeks. Really is kind of surreal!!