Behavior you (USC man) find odd

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Dating as equals?

One would hope so.

Why do so many FSU women post their profiles to internet sites in the USA?

Usually because what they seek they can not find in their own countries.

Why do so many American men spend a small fortune and all the grief of travel to meet a FSU women?

Ah Ha.....you are doing too much reading again. Stop believing everything these websites are telling you. There are not that many men doing this; it is well known that less than 5% of the men corresponding with the women actually do get onto a plane. Ask the women, they will tell you. The websites will make you believe there are millions of men jetting on over but that is just not the case. Very few do and on top of that very few will actually become couples.

The two sides see opportunities they can not easily find in their home countries. They have something we want. We have something they want. That is the starting point for many of these relationships.

Here' an interesting article from Pravda:

American men use Russian women for self-affirmation. The latter seem to be liking this fact.

Marriages between Russian women and American men are very successful and harmonious, Olga Makhovskaya, the senior research assistant at the Psychology Institute in Russia's Academy of Sciences says. When an American man switches from the model of American family where husband and wife are partners equal in rights to the model of an Orthodox family, he thus raises his own significance. In Orthodox families men are given more authority and are more respected. It is certainly an advantage for a man and raises his social and psychological status. In a word, American men seem to have tired of the feminism propagated by American women, and it is frequent that they seek Russian women to start families.

Russian wives in America give up the traditional model of the Russian Orthodox family which relieves them of a heavy burden of responsibility and gives a chance to have a normal life in a family where the range of responsibilities is more definite for them: children, family affairs and housekeeping. At that, Russian women enjoy more attention and support from husbands.

As psychologists say, now Russian men undervalue the essence of family. The whole of the burden, housekeeping, upbringing of children, earning of money are shifted onto women. And, at the time when Russian women have so much responsibilities, their husbands spend their time dozing in front of TV sets in desperate attempts to find out the meaning of life and to understand the truth of the universe. They merely disregard everyday problems that are essential for their families as they consider the above mentioned idle thinking to be of higher importance.

That is why, as Olga Makhovskaya thinks relations in families between Russian and American partners are more harmonious. Each party gets what it wants to have. Husbands get authority and status, and wives are given, in exchange, peace in family and well-being. "Families of this kind where husbands are Americans and women are Russians prove to be long-living, as the roles in the family are clearly distributed and the mechanism operates good, although these are mixed families. In such families each of the couple is ready to make concessions and on the whole, wonderfully performs the role."

In addition, as researches held by Olga Makhovskaya reveal, marriages between Chinese men and Russian women are also very successful. “There are tens of thousands of such marriages in Russia's Primorye region in the Far East. Chinese men are hard-working, they don't abuse in alcohol drinking and bring their wages home. In a word, they have lots of advantages by contrast with Russian men." It is sad, but the researches don't mention for whom Russian men suit wonderfully.

Olga Blagodarova

The Tatarstan Izvestia newspaper

I think the evaluation is good. what little I have researched shows Russian/Ukrainian/American marriages are far ahead in the statistics for success, something like 81% still married after 10 years vs 50% for American/American marriages. Could be that Russians/Ukrainians do not have a disposable attitude about almost anything and Alla comments on how much Americans "throw away" She loves garage sales but thinks Am,ericans are daft to sell all this "good stuff" so cheap...almost free. The one thing they universally hate is a drunk and/or abuser.

She doesn't want to throw out bottles or jars...God forbid throw away a scrap of food! They just hang on and do what they can to make it better. Not a bad quality in a wife.

[Mishkanna 0]

Just ask your russian wifes what is that mean: "KOGDA IMEEM NE HRANIM A POTERYAVSHI PLACHEM"

real good saying for all of us.

[Brad and Vika 129]

OK, try going into the deep, harsh interior and see if that profile changes.

A Ukraine woman from Kiev is very different from one living in the interior villages. You can't understand until you venture out there...where English is rarely spoken and you don't get a private driver...just a junker taxi or an ancient bus...or walk it. Life is harsh and women are anxious to leave...so you can expect high respect, gratitude, and cooperation in moving forward in a relationship. Rather than wining and dining and hoping she picks YOU.

A judge lot of American men hide, deny and repress the truth that the term, "Mail Order Bride" is not that far off the mark to save face and to fabricate a relationship that is advertised as love when it may well be for other reasons. The fat, bald guy who gets the beautiful, gorgeous younger wife is not far fetched. But you will not likely find that sort of possibility these days unless you go pioneer. Take the road less travelled. Or, get a cushy overseas job and YOU are in the drivers seat...as with Gary. Gary is not the typical, internet driven American wife shopper.

Good for him. The rest of us have to do it the hard and fast way.

I met my wife here in the US, in person. She is from Kherson, a city of 400,000 or 500,000. Not sure exactly what statistical group this places us in. I did travel back and forth to see her after she went home, but neither of us knew when she left that there would be anything between us, let alone marraige.

[visaveteran 1]

OK, try going into the deep, harsh interior and see if that profile changes.

A Ukraine woman from Kiev is very different from one living in the interior villages. You can't understand until you venture out there...where English is rarely spoken and you don't get a private driver...just a junker taxi or an ancient bus...or walk it. Life is harsh and women are anxious to leave...so you can expect high respect, gratitude, and cooperation in moving forward in a relationship. Rather than wining and dining and hoping she picks YOU.

A judge lot of American men hide, deny and repress the truth that the term, "Mail Order Bride" is not that far off the mark to save face and to fabricate a relationship that is advertised as love when it may well be for other reasons. The fat, bald guy who gets the beautiful, gorgeous younger wife is not far fetched. But you will not likely find that sort of possibility these days unless you go pioneer. Take the road less travelled. Or, get a cushy overseas job and YOU are in the drivers seat...as with Gary. Gary is not the typical, internet driven American wife shopper.

Good for him. The rest of us have to do it the hard and fast way.

I met my wife here in the US, in person. She is from Kherson, a city of 400,000 or 500,000. Not sure exactly what statistical group this places us in. I did travel back and forth to see her after she went home, but neither of us knew when she left that there would be anything between us, let alone marraige.

How did you meet in the USA? If you don't mind sharing. How did you end up married? Email exchanges? Phone calls? What changed things to serious?

[Brad and Vika 129]

OK, try going into the deep, harsh interior and see if that profile changes.

A Ukraine woman from Kiev is very different from one living in the interior villages. You can't understand until you venture out there...where English is rarely spoken and you don't get a private driver...just a junker taxi or an ancient bus...or walk it. Life is harsh and women are anxious to leave...so you can expect high respect, gratitude, and cooperation in moving forward in a relationship. Rather than wining and dining and hoping she picks YOU.

A judge lot of American men hide, deny and repress the truth that the term, "Mail Order Bride" is not that far off the mark to save face and to fabricate a relationship that is advertised as love when it may well be for other reasons. The fat, bald guy who gets the beautiful, gorgeous younger wife is not far fetched. But you will not likely find that sort of possibility these days unless you go pioneer. Take the road less travelled. Or, get a cushy overseas job and YOU are in the drivers seat...as with Gary. Gary is not the typical, internet driven American wife shopper.

Good for him. The rest of us have to do it the hard and fast way.

I met my wife here in the US, in person. She is from Kherson, a city of 400,000 or 500,000. Not sure exactly what statistical group this places us in. I did travel back and forth to see her after she went home, but neither of us knew when she left that there would be anything between us, let alone marraige.

How did you meet in the USA? If you don't mind sharing. How did you end up married? Email exchanges? Phone calls? What changed things to serious?

PM me and I will be happy to tell you about it.

[slim 1,525]

It's so funny to see you guys pissing and yelling in another thread and then best buddies over here PMing and such. Awwww.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

It's so funny to see you guys pissing and yelling in another thread and then best buddies over here PMing and such. Awwww.

way to go, Slim! Now you done let the cat out of the bag! They thought they were PMing someone else.

[Brad and Vika 129]

It's so funny to see you guys pissing and yelling in another thread and then best buddies over here PMing and such. Awwww.

way to go, Slim! Now you done let the cat out of the bag! They thought they were PMing someone else.

The reason I asked for the PM was the posts in the other thread. I assumed he was looking for more reasons to attack - or looking for the word attack (to provoke some nasty "defense" or denial, or statement of strength).

[clueless_in_usa 8]

OK, try going into the deep, harsh interior and see if that profile changes.

A Ukraine woman from Kiev is very different from one living in the interior villages. You can't understand until you venture out there...where English is rarely spoken and you don't get a private driver...just a junker taxi or an ancient bus...or walk it. Life is harsh and women are anxious to leave...so you can expect high respect, gratitude, and cooperation in moving forward in a relationship. Rather than wining and dining and hoping she picks YOU.

A judge lot of American men hide, deny and repress the truth that the term, "Mail Order Bride" is not that far off the mark to save face and to fabricate a relationship that is advertised as love when it may well be for other reasons. The fat, bald guy who gets the beautiful, gorgeous younger wife is not far fetched. But you will not likely find that sort of possibility these days unless you go pioneer. Take the road less travelled. Or, get a cushy overseas job and YOU are in the drivers seat...as with Gary. Gary is not the typical, internet driven American wife shopper.

Good for him. The rest of us have to do it the hard and fast way.

I like to use the term "Mail Order Bride" even though I found my future wife in a social networking site instead of a marriage agency. It is the best way to explain the contrast:

Old, fat, bald vs Much younger, slim, and beautiful

I like to tell people that I ordered her from a catalog exactly to my specifications ... and it came with "Money Back Guarantee."

By the way, I did not realized until now that getting married in the USA was so expensive. Everything I spent on the process before she arrived dwarfs compared to what I have to spend in just one day (our wedding day). I hope it lasts, because I do not know if I can afford a new one (especially after losing half my assets in a divorce)

[1HappyGuy 45]

Well as usual, we have strayed from the topic, so I'll add my 2 cents worth too.

The term Mail Order Bride is way overused by the media. They find it convenient to label the trend to finding foreign wives in such terms although in the history of this country it was originally used to bring east coast women to men on the west coast and to the gold fields of California and Alaska. Those days are nothing like today and the process is much more complicated.

How you met your significant other varies between so many factors, but it seems pretty clear that the driving force is what American men offer foreign women. Particularily in former SU countries the women are looking for stability, lower alcohol consumption, willingness to work and a desire to have a reliable home/family life. If the men of this region provided these qualities the opportunities for old, fat, bald men to get lovely younger women would dry up. Conversely, the women of this region provide the American men with many qualities that are hard to find in American women.

In my case, I went the route of taking a tour to meet women. It was a very effective method for meeting lots of women, but not a perfect case to just say, "I'll take that one, wrap her up". It is necessary to begin a real correspondence after the first meeting and see if there is really something there for both of you. Then, unless you are completely out of your mind, you need to travel back to see her again and see if there is any real chemistry.

But one thing that many people not directly involved with this process don't seem to get is that we really do fall in love. We also have fights, misunderstandings and just normal difficulties. But in the end, we generally try harder to make it work and try to understand each other's positions. I can hear it now, "OMG, you have a real marriage".

I know that there was one thing that I kept hearing from the other American men on my tour that surprised me, because I thought I was the only one that thought this. That is, they were tired of trying to please American women, because you just couldn't do enough to satisfy them. It was that they always wanted more and more and more. So many of these men were just tired of trying.

Now I know that any American woman reading that last part is going to blast me, but that's the facts as I saw them.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Well as usual, we have strayed from the topic, so I'll add my 2 cents worth too.

The term Mail Order Bride is way overused by the media. They find it convenient to label the trend to finding foreign wives in such terms although in the history of this country it was originally used to bring east coast women to men on the west coast and to the gold fields of California and Alaska. Those days are nothing like today and the process is much more complicated.

How you met your significant other varies between so many factors, but it seems pretty clear that the driving force is what American men offer foreign women. Particularily in former SU countries the women are looking for stability, lower alcohol consumption, willingness to work and a desire to have a reliable home/family life. If the men of this region provided these qualities the opportunities for old, fat, bald men to get lovely younger women would dry up. Conversely, the women of this region provide the American men with many qualities that are hard to find in American women.

In my case, I went the route of taking a tour to meet women. It was a very effective method for meeting lots of women, but not a perfect case to just say, "I'll take that one, wrap her up". It is necessary to begin a real correspondence after the first meeting and see if there is really something there for both of you. Then, unless you are completely out of your mind, you need to travel back to see her again and see if there is any real chemistry.

But one thing that many people not directly involved with this process don't seem to get is that we really do fall in love. We also have fights, misunderstandings and just normal difficulties. But in the end, we generally try harder to make it work and try to understand each other's positions. I can hear it now, "OMG, you have a real marriage".

I know that there was one thing that I kept hearing from the other American men on my tour that surprised me, because I thought I was the only one that thought this. That is, they were tired of trying to please American women, because you just couldn't do enough to satisfy them. It was that they always wanted more and more and more. So many of these men were just tired of trying.

Now I know that any American woman reading that last part is going to blast me, but that's the facts as I saw them.

Sure because the dumb@ss media needs sound bites. Assualt rifles and Saturday Night Specials are much used phrases also. But yes, the MOB term can be fun. I tell people that in Ukraine women are factory made by Dr. Finetush at his secret laboratory.

[slim 1,525]

I tell people I have an MOB and when they ask her where she's from she says Africa. Then we tell them we met in Korea and it really throws them for a loop.

- Then they stop asking questions.