Did you feel safer in Canada or in the U.S.?

[Krikit 1,165]

I believe what Carla was saying (and please correct me if i'm wrong Carla) is that we seem to be so open minded about hearing information about a profession in the sex industry - which is kind of a hot topic and yet when Carla tries to give us information based on her experience, people get all up in arms. I didn't see Carla's post as anything more than sharing information with us gleaned from a wealth of experience. Now some people may not be interested in hearing about sex offenders, or strippers for that matter and that is their perogative - but it would be good to separate the emotion from the information maybe.

I guess I see that - instead of asking questions and trying to see what Carla can see - people get up in arms and just say nooooo sex offenders are bad, lock up the kids!

Now i'm not saying that sex offenders are pillars of society, but what I am saying is that the gut reaction seems to have made some people overlook what was really being said. Just my opinion.

Good post. That's how I read it too.

Which is absurd. Also, I know that there have been court cases in the last 10 years where the legal age of consent is 16...and a 16 and 17 year old had sex...and for some reason the parents go ape and accuse the 17 year old of rape...and then he is a registered SO. That, to me, is so horrible.

I know. I find those type cases so very sad.

[thetreble 19]

I believe what Carla was saying (and please correct me if i'm wrong Carla) is that we seem to be so open minded about hearing information about a profession in the sex industry - which is kind of a hot topic ...

Now i'm not saying that sex offenders are pillars of society, but what I am saying is that the gut reaction seems to have made some people overlook what was really being said. Just my opinion.

Trailmix, I don't believe that thinking sex offenders are awful means you are closed minded. I'm pretty open about stuff and I believe I'm being open minded in my opinion which is that I don't believe that you can separate an offender and their actions from the person. To me, it's absolutely disgusting for an adult to touch a child.

When we were talking about strippers, we were talking about adults who were making their own choices and I believe we were trying to have fun at the end of the discussion. I still don't understand how we can really compare those two things.

I think, at the end of the day, how would any of us feel if our own children were the victims of sexual abuse? Could we talk to the abuser like they were actually a "person"?

Carla definitely has the experience in the field, there is no doubt there. I'm sure Carla has probably changed many peoples lives in terms of helping people who have committed serious crimes. I just don't understand how you could, say, empathize or sympathize. But, that's probably why I could never work in a field like that. I guess I don't have what it takes.

Edited September 9, 2009 by thetreble

[Ban Hammer 13,589]

I'd be interested/scared to see it

not finding the site.....bleh.

[Krikit 1,165]

I expected Charles' post to be about strippers.

[trailmix 77]

I believe what Carla was saying (and please correct me if i'm wrong Carla) is that we seem to be so open minded about hearing information about a profession in the sex industry - which is kind of a hot topic ...

Now i'm not saying that sex offenders are pillars of society, but what I am saying is that the gut reaction seems to have made some people overlook what was really being said. Just my opinion.

Trailmix, I don't believe that thinking sex offenders are awful means you are closed minded. I'm pretty open about stuff and I believe I'm being open minded in my opinion which is that I don't believe that you can separate an offender and their actions from the person. To me, it's absolutely disgusting for an adult to touch a child.

When we were talking about strippers, we were talking about adults who were making their own choices and I believe we were trying to have fun at the end of the discussion. I still don't understand how we can really compare those two things.

I think, at the end of the day, how would any of us feel if our own children were the victims of sexual abuse? Could we talk to the abuser like they were actually a "person"?

Carla definitely has the experience in the field, there is no doubt there. I'm sure Carla has probably changed many peoples lives in terms of helping people who have committed serious crimes. I just don't understand how you could, say, empathize or sympathize. But, that's probably why I could never work in a field like that. I guess I don't have what it takes.

Hey Amanda,

I think you did miss my point.

I also absolutely do not think that because anyone thinks sex offenders are awful means they are closed minded. I think sexual offences of any kind are abhorrent.

But Carla was sharing her knowledge with us - that's a different thing. If Carla has compassion for the people she worked with that is because she is coming from a place where she has experience and she sees something we don't. She did work that a lot of us couldn't. So my point is she is sharing her experience and knowledge and is immediately shut down - because no one will hear it from a different point of view. I'm not saying I would agree either, I just think the reaction to Carla, personally, was not warranted.

Yes the stripper thread was kind of fun and silly - but as we all know there is a dark horrible seedy side to that industry - which we conveniently overlooked in that thread - which is ok - but.

[Ban Hammer 13,589]

I expected Charles' post to be about strippers.

i can't find a website that shows the location of strippers either

[The_Dude 1,142]

I expected Charles' post to be about strippers.

i can't find a website that shows the location of strippers either

Thats easy charles. Just go to an airport, any airport, and circle around. There is always like a dozen strip clubs within a 5 mile radius of the airport. If you dont' find one to your satisfaction, then go downtown, yet another proven epicenter.

[Ban Hammer 13,589]

I expected Charles' post to be about strippers.

i can't find a website that shows the location of strippers either

Thats easy charles. Just go to an airport, any airport, and circle around. There is always like a dozen strip clubs within a 5 mile radius of the airport. If you dont' find one to your satisfaction, then go downtown, yet another proven epicenter.

you haven't been to mci (kansas city international) have you?

[thetreble 19]

I believe what Carla was saying (and please correct me if i'm wrong Carla) is that we seem to be so open minded about hearing information about a profession in the sex industry - which is kind of a hot topic ...

Now i'm not saying that sex offenders are pillars of society, but what I am saying is that the gut reaction seems to have made some people overlook what was really being said. Just my opinion.

Trailmix, I don't believe that thinking sex offenders are awful means you are closed minded. I'm pretty open about stuff and I believe I'm being open minded in my opinion which is that I don't believe that you can separate an offender and their actions from the person. To me, it's absolutely disgusting for an adult to touch a child.

When we were talking about strippers, we were talking about adults who were making their own choices and I believe we were trying to have fun at the end of the discussion. I still don't understand how we can really compare those two things.

I think, at the end of the day, how would any of us feel if our own children were the victims of sexual abuse? Could we talk to the abuser like they were actually a "person"?

Carla definitely has the experience in the field, there is no doubt there. I'm sure Carla has probably changed many peoples lives in terms of helping people who have committed serious crimes. I just don't understand how you could, say, empathize or sympathize. But, that's probably why I could never work in a field like that. I guess I don't have what it takes.

Hey Amanda,

I think you did miss my point.

I also absolutely do not think that because anyone thinks sex offenders are awful means they are closed minded. I think sexual offences of any kind are abhorrent.

But Carla was sharing her knowledge with us - that's a different thing. If Carla has compassion for the people she worked with that is because she is coming from a place where she has experience and she sees something we don't. She did work that a lot of us couldn't. So my point is she is sharing her experience and knowledge and is immediately shut down - because no one will hear it from a different point of view. I'm not saying I would agree either, I just think the reaction to Carla, personally, was not warranted.

but as we all know there is a dark horrible seedy side to that industry - which we conveniently overlooked in that thread - which is ok - but.

I believe there were plenty of points in the stripper thread where people mentioned the seedy side to the sex industry. I believe that goes without saying.

Here is the thing, and maybe I'm an a-hole, but I don't think there is a different point of view when it comes to true sex offenders. To me, some things are truly black and white. Some things have shades of grey, 10000 different angles, but when it comes to acts of abuse on children, I only see it in black and white.

Maybe the reaction wasn't warranted, but I do think that's an issue where you aren't going to find too many people on the side of the sex offender and I don't think it takes knowledge or experience to understand that.

[JillA 2]

"Here is the thing, and maybe I'm an a-hole, but I don't think there is a different point of view when it comes to true sex offenders. To me, some things are truly black and white. Some things have shades of grey, 10000 different angles, but when it comes to acts of abuse on children, I only see it in black and white."

You're no ahole, I feel the exact same way.

[The_Dude 1,142]

Here is the thing, and maybe I'm an a-hole, but I don't think there is a different point of view when it comes to true sex offenders. To me, some things are truly black and white. Some things have shades of grey, 10000 different angles, but when it comes to acts of abuse on children, I only see it in black and white.

Quit trying to take my job

[Ban Hammer 13,589]

"Here is the thing, and maybe I'm an a-hole, but I don't think there is a different point of view when it comes to true sex offenders. To me, some things are truly black and white. Some things have shades of grey, 10000 different angles, but when it comes to acts of abuse on children, I only see it in black and white."

You're no ahole, I feel the exact same way.

and i've exercised remarkable restraint in not putting in my two cents on that issue.

Here is the thing, and maybe I'm an a-hole, but I don't think there is a different point of view when it comes to true sex offenders. To me, some things are truly black and white. Some things have shades of grey, 10000 different angles, but when it comes to acts of abuse on children, I only see it in black and white.

Quit trying to take my job

no one can take your job because quite frankly, we're not really sure what you do....

[thetreble 19]

[trailmix 77]

I believe there were plenty of points in the stripper thread where people mentioned the seedy side to the sex industry. I believe that goes without saying.

Here is the thing, and maybe I'm an a-hole, but I don't think there is a different point of view when it comes to true sex offenders. To me, some things are truly black and white. Some things have shades of grey, 10000 different angles, but when it comes to acts of abuse on children, I only see it in black and white.

Maybe the reaction wasn't warranted, but I do think that's an issue where you aren't going to find too many people on the side of the sex offender and I don't think it takes knowledge or experience to understand that.

I don't think you are an a-hole, personally, for expressing your point of view about this, I can see where it is black and white for, probably, the majority of people, that is not surprising.

It was the reaction really (to Carla), as you mentioned - I didn't see Carla as supporting sex offenders, just stating that she perhaps sees things a little differently, from her experience.

Edited September 9, 2009 by trailmix

[thetreble 19]

Understandable. I see what you are saying and I acknowledge that.