Update from Leedah

[Leedah 22]

Hi all.

I posted on here awhile back regarding my situation. (search me for back info).

Well, I go for my divorce hearing on Tuesday and will be requesting an annulment (if that is even possible since it's initially a divorce petition). The clerk said that since I am doing this all pro se, I will just speak with the judge and make all my requests when we get in front of the judge.

I haven't seen my spouse since June and have everything in order to finish the hearing.

As for me, I've realized my passion to become a writer. I am now officially a freelance writer and also got a position as a writer for a nationally known company.

So, in spite of the drama, something GREAT came of all this mess.

I am blessed.

Thank you all for your words and support.

Leedah

Edited September 6, 2009 by Leedah

[WhidbeyGirl 1]

Very good to hear that you triumphed through it all. May you continue to be blessed and prosper.

[Y's_habibitk 2]

congratulations all around...for having the courage to end the marriage and for following your dreams and making them happen

thats awesome

[Rhiannercakes 14]

Good luck with your freelance writing!

You should link us to some articles from time to time.

[TBoneTX 44,791]

Hearty dittos to all comments above, si man. At your option, please consider telling us the outcome of the court proceedings.

[meowmeowmeow 0]

good to hear you had the courage to kick trash to the curb and wish you the best in your upcoming career...and hope you haven't given up on love....

[Leedah 22]

Thanks for the comments.

I will post the outcome of the divorce case when it's done.

By the way, I heard from an investigator that the case against my soon to be ex in the criminal court (the aggravated assault) is getting ready to be presented to the grand jury.

We'll see on that also. I got a chance to see my photo's that were taken of me when the officers arrested him. It brought back painful memories and I realized (again) that I really was in an domestic violence situation. I began to revisit what it was like to be with that person,...and by seeing those photo's, I wonder how love can cloud judgement that much.

The photo's they gave me were taken with a light sensitive camera, therefore I could see the scratches, bruises and blood in clear detail on my face. At that time, it didn't seem like much because I was in denial.

However, I can tell you, by looking at those photo's...it wasn't the actual blood on my face that could get him convicted.

It...was...the HAUNTED expression that I had on my face.

I literally looked like I was a zombie and part of the walking dead.

I was looking into space (even while looking into the camera) and appeared not to be "all there".

My eyes were blank and fixed,.. my mouth was in a half quiver (kind of the way a person looks when they are just about to break out in a massive wail).

Basically, it looked like I had just seen someone die directly in front of me.

I guess now that I think about it,...I did see something die. The marriage, my heart,...the dream of a life with the person I THOUGHT I loved deeply

Good God, looking at that photo...I wanted to cry. It was as if I was looking at someone else in that photo.

Whew! I pray that no person EVER has to go through that kind of pain.

Now I see why investigators take pictures at crime scenes.

A picture can definitely tell a story that no words ever can.

Peace to you all.

Edited September 6, 2009 by Leedah

[canadian_wife 1,808]

Good for you! Congrats on your courage!

Sharing your story can help others. Thank you!

[KarenCee 3]

YOU GO GIRL!!!! I am proud that yet another sorry POS abuser doesn't get away with it! AND on top of all that YOU come out of this with your head held high and a positive outlook and a great new career! Stay with us Leedah...you can be of help to other spouses in your situation as well.

[Peace be still 6]

Wow your story was amazing. I'm happy that you are going to live out your dreams. I read your timeline, and I see where your soon to be ex just got here to the States. Was it his first time hitting you when he got here or was he beating you when you would visit him? He should be deported, and receive a life time ban after they send he punk butt to the penitentary, and becomes somebody woman. Any man that will hit on a woman will never fight a man.

[reeses16 8]

I was wondering how you were doing. Thanks for the update. I wish you much success in your new career and happiness in your personal life. I admire your strength and courage.

[Old Dominion 26]

Congratulations!

By the way, you write very well and I was trying to send a message about what kind of free-lancing you are doing? But your mailbox is full. Am working on free lance writing myself

[shefellfromheaven 18]

Leedah

May God give you more strength.

[Leedah 22]

Wow your story was amazing. I'm happy that you are going to live out your dreams. I read your timeline, and I see where your soon to be ex just got here to the States. Was it his first time hitting you when he got here or was he beating you when you would visit him? He should be deported, and receive a life time ban after they send he punk butt to the penitentary, and becomes somebody woman. Any man that will hit on a woman will never fight a man.

In answer to your question:

It wasn't his first time. I would visit him and he would do it in subtle ways in the beginning.

Like if we were going somewhere and I was walking too slow for him (he's 6'1 & I'm 5'3), he would grab my hand and drag me along. (I thought it was just to make sure we could catch one of the taxi's that would speed by, but now I realized that none of the other men would treat their wives like that). Later on, it got progressively worse and of course my denial of how he was treating me progressed as well.

Withstanding all that, I stayed because I figured that he was acting that way due to him not having any experience with women (he was a virgin though we are close to the same age), traveling or just plain being a man. I thought he would change once he got to the U.S. and saw that it is more civilized in terms of how women should be treated. This is also what his whole family and his friends told me. Big mistake. People don't change unless they want to.

As for him getting deported, I'm not sure what will happen on that. He doesn't have any evidence of us living together and I've already sent info to uscis regarding this whole shebang (including documentation of the arrest, no violent contact order from judge, victim letter, info on pending divorce, etc). I doubt he cares about any of that or will even remove conditions. I think he is just hanging in and working as much as he can for money until they come looking for him or he finds a way to keep his status some other way.

Maybe pushbrk can give some insight on what he thinks. Somebody pm him to come visit this section and lend his expertise.

Anyway, I got out and am happy for it.

Edited September 6, 2009 by Leedah

[Leedah 22]

Old Dominion,

Hi.

Sorry, my mailbox was full before.

Anyway, I submit articles to several publishers.

To start freelancing, just write some article samples and submit them to different newspapers on and offline.

If what you submit is newsworthy, they will take your submission. After that, keep submitting articles from idea's. (use keyword tools when you write to get a good placement in the search engines.) If you submit enough articles that they can count on to be good, they will take you for a virtual staff writer if you want it.

Hope this helps someone else who would like to get into this field also.

By the way, I am in process of writing an article about what happened (the scam). It's kind of therapeutic for me and hopefully it will help someone else who was/is in the same situation.

I will be going in to delete some of my messages in a few minutes. If anyone wants to share there story (doesn't have to be related to mine exactly, just your own story), let me know here or pm me with your email.

I write abundantly anyway, therefore, my editor will feature your story.

Thanks everyone for your support again and I truly appreciate the kindness.