Missing him...

[Teffah 5]

sometimes the simplest things are the easiest answers....spend time with people, distract yourself from your situation, watch a silly movie/tv show, go out...do an activity....time will go quicker as well...

we're all in your shoes, one way or another, trust me...you can do it, but you have to prepare for a hard and long wait.

Thank you, I don't think I fully realized the wait ahead.. and even once he is here the paperwork doesn't stop. I am sure with time everything will work out. Thank you.

We all have moments of weakness.. and I am sure I will have several more to come.

[Sandrila 1]

I can relate to becoming prisoner to the PC but please know you will be in for a little lengthy ride and with that being said, the only thing I look back on from my journey and can advise you to do is keep busy. Go out do things, update your place, organize or weed out what you don't need in preparation for your honey to come.

Don't get too overwhelmed (as hard as it is not to) thinking about how long or if it will happen.

If only someone had told me, don't worry, it will happen, you just have to wait, I would have felt a whole lot better but just waiting indefinitely and being afraid that it won't be approved is very scary. "what if" we don't have a chance to be together is what drags us down.

Make sure all your I's are dotted and T's crossed and you will be ok.

It is like picking a number at a deli counter, only with thousands of others waiting in line with you.

Your number will come and you will be served.

I wish you the best and God give you the strength and patience to endure.

[tany1157 161]

I can relate to becoming prisoner to the PC but please know you will be in for a little lengthy ride and with that being said, the only thing I look back on from my journey and can advise you to do is keep busy. Go out do things, update your place, organize or weed out what you don't need in preparation for your honey to come.

Don't get too overwhelmed (as hard as it is not to) thinking about how long or if it will happen.

If only someone had told me, don't worry, it will happen, you just have to wait, I would have felt a whole lot better but just waiting indefinitely and being afraid that it won't be approved is very scary. "what if" we don't have a chance to be together is what drags us down.

Make sure all your I's are dotted and T's crossed and you will be ok.

It is like picking a number at a deli counter, only with thousands of others waiting in line with you.

Your number will come and you will be served.

I wish you the best and God give you the strength and patience to endure.

I don't know what is was that you said exactly, but of all the wonderful and helpful comments I have heard, yours touched me...I am so afraid, because someone else is going to decide whether I can be with my baby, and it's not fair but I do understand why it has to be this way But I just wanted to say thank you....me and luvlikcraz are just starting our journey, and we don't fully understand everything that lies ahead. But I will say one thing, all I can think about is his interview, because I have heard Casablanca is so difficult. Anyways, we have done what we needed to do and then some, so I shouldn't be worried, but you never know, the interviewer could be having an off day, and there goes everything...I even had a nightmare about it last night, and the whole time, my mom kept saying, " he isn't going to pass, he isn't going to pass..." It sucked! Bottom line is, I have to cling to my faith in God, and trust in God, that's all we can really do as the time goes by.

[Olive♥ 2]

I don't know if this is in the right spot or not, but I am sure you all have had the same feelings as I am having now. I am just starting this visa journey and already I feel at a loss... waiting, and waiting. I know that the case won't be touched right away but I find myself click on the login in button and checking to see, just in case. I am almost overly consumed with this, but he is my life.

Bijad, my love, is in no hurry to come to America. He is scared of being a burden, or not being able to find a job; that I will not see him as a man. While trying to collect information for his biographical information he kept telling me to slow down; everything has a time and place. He is always reminding me that, “God is in control.” I don’t want to slow down, I want this to be done and over with, and I want him HERE!

He would love for me to move to Morocco, but honestly he is without a job at the moment and living wonderfully with his parents. I am in my senior year, although 27. I will graduate in May with my Elementary Education Degree with endorsements in Special Education and Reading. My passion is special education. My ability to work in Morocco is little to nothing, especially with special education kiddos.

You would think I didn’t have any extra time on my hands, with college classes at three different universities (trying to get in all the classes I need before student teaching) plus my internship at an elementary school. I am also employed at two different school districts to sub, but as you may or may not know subbing is not a guarantee of work… just waiting for someone to call.

But with all this being said, I find myself spending my entire free time sitting and waiting for Bijad to come online. He lives in a small village and his connection to the internet is not reliable. Sometimes he can call to tell me he can’t get on and sometimes he can’t. I try to call and sometimes I can get through and other times it just rings and rings. It’s like I can’t make myself move from here, just in case he pops on. He tells me I need to continue to live my life, but I can’t. I need him and I miss him so much.

I returned from Morocco about one month ago and had a wonderful time and I will be going back in December.

What did you do to keep yourself busy? I have tried to pick up my beading and making jewelry, but then I find myself coming back to the computer to check. Ugh!

I really need common sense advice to get my life back in order. I have no one else who understands what I am going through with the visa process. Please don’t be rude with your comments. I am really struggling with my life right now and have more than enough going on.

Thanks,

Hi Theresa-

I can relate to where you are right now because I was there myself a year ago. I found I buried myself in my work and VJ to help pass the time. Feel right at home andf completely normal. Olive

[Myo 0]

I don't know if this is in the right spot or not, but I am sure you all have had the same feelings as I am having now. I am just starting this visa journey and already I feel at a loss... waiting, and waiting. I know that the case won't be touched right away but I find myself click on the login in button and checking to see, just in case. I am almost overly consumed with this, but he is my life.

Bijad, my love, is in no hurry to come to America. He is scared of being a burden, or not being able to find a job; that I will not see him as a man. While trying to collect information for his biographical information he kept telling me to slow down; everything has a time and place. He is always reminding me that, “God is in control.” I don’t want to slow down, I want this to be done and over with, and I want him HERE!

He would love for me to move to Morocco, but honestly he is without a job at the moment and living wonderfully with his parents. I am in my senior year, although 27. I will graduate in May with my Elementary Education Degree with endorsements in Special Education and Reading. My passion is special education. My ability to work in Morocco is little to nothing, especially with special education kiddos.

You would think I didn’t have any extra time on my hands, with college classes at three different universities (trying to get in all the classes I need before student teaching) plus my internship at an elementary school. I am also employed at two different school districts to sub, but as you may or may not know subbing is not a guarantee of work… just waiting for someone to call.

But with all this being said, I find myself spending my entire free time sitting and waiting for Bijad to come online. He lives in a small village and his connection to the internet is not reliable. Sometimes he can call to tell me he can’t get on and sometimes he can’t. I try to call and sometimes I can get through and other times it just rings and rings. It’s like I can’t make myself move from here, just in case he pops on. He tells me I need to continue to live my life, but I can’t. I need him and I miss him so much.

I returned from Morocco about one month ago and had a wonderful time and I will be going back in December.

What did you do to keep yourself busy? I have tried to pick up my beading and making jewelry, but then I find myself coming back to the computer to check. Ugh!

I really need common sense advice to get my life back in order. I have no one else who understands what I am going through with the visa process. Please don’t be rude with your comments. I am really struggling with my life right now and have more than enough going on.

Thanks,

I feel your pain - I'm sure most people on this site can feel your pain. The idea of finding a spouse outside of your country is not a new one. Before the internet, and the telephone for that matter, international relationships were managed through snail mail. I wonder if you and your fiance' would consider changing, or adding to, your method of communication to snail mail this might make your waiting worthwhile. I can remember when I was a kid how exciting it was to receive a letter in the mail (that's right, I'm 51 so I do remember the time). In your situation, where internet and telephone communications are challenging, rather than sitting at the computer sit at your desk and write him letters - don't forget to keep a copy for your visa process. Hopefully, he can do the same and maybe you can begin looking forwar to receiving a communication from him twice a month. I don't how expensive it is to send letters to his country or for him to send them to you - just something to consider.

[thongd4me 69]

I don't know if this is in the right spot or not, but I am sure you all have had the same feelings as I am having now. I am just starting this visa journey and already I feel at a loss... waiting, and waiting. I know that the case won't be touched right away but I find myself click on the login in button and checking to see, just in case. I am almost overly consumed with this, but he is my life.

Bijad, my love, is in no hurry to come to America. He is scared of being a burden, or not being able to find a job; that I will not see him as a man. While trying to collect information for his biographical information he kept telling me to slow down; everything has a time and place. He is always reminding me that, “God is in control.” I don’t want to slow down, I want this to be done and over with, and I want him HERE!

He would love for me to move to Morocco, but honestly he is without a job at the moment and living wonderfully with his parents. I am in my senior year, although 27. I will graduate in May with my Elementary Education Degree with endorsements in Special Education and Reading. My passion is special education. My ability to work in Morocco is little to nothing, especially with special education kiddos.

You would think I didn’t have any extra time on my hands, with college classes at three different universities (trying to get in all the classes I need before student teaching) plus my internship at an elementary school. I am also employed at two different school districts to sub, but as you may or may not know subbing is not a guarantee of work… just waiting for someone to call.

But with all this being said, I find myself spending my entire free time sitting and waiting for Bijad to come online. He lives in a small village and his connection to the internet is not reliable. Sometimes he can call to tell me he can’t get on and sometimes he can’t. I try to call and sometimes I can get through and other times it just rings and rings. It’s like I can’t make myself move from here, just in case he pops on. He tells me I need to continue to live my life, but I can’t. I need him and I miss him so much.

I returned from Morocco about one month ago and had a wonderful time and I will be going back in December.

What did you do to keep yourself busy? I have tried to pick up my beading and making jewelry, but then I find myself coming back to the computer to check. Ugh!

I really need common sense advice to get my life back in order. I have no one else who understands what I am going through with the visa process. Please don’t be rude with your comments. I am really struggling with my life right now and have more than enough going on.

Thanks,

I know Arab culture as well as any non-Arab*, which may not be saying much, but I also know human nature.

While you were in Morocco, all the relatives showered you with an incredible level of love that you may not

have encountered even in your own family. It's an Arab tradition to honor a guest above all others:

"In my house, a guest, is king, even if he is my enemy."

That being said, you may have to evaluate which one of you wants this to happen more,

and listen to what he is saying. Men of all nationalities also don't want to be pressured.

My SO has waited patiently for over 5 years for my divorce to be finalized and never criticized me for that once.

She said that she would be fine living in Thailand and letting me visit any time I wanted, but when my divorce

became final, she was overjoyed that we would finally be together.

There is ANOTHER possibility that may or may not have anything to do with him being Moroccan.

He may have had an "unattainable" unrequited love that never showed interest in him, who suddenly

came out of the woodwork when it was announced that he was preparing to marry an American.

Also, there could be countless cousins, aunts & uncles who suddenly become matchmakers, with

the goal as "anything but a foreigner." You don''t know if he's under pressure or not and if he

is, he certainly wouldn't tell you, especially if he's never been married before and is relatively young.

If he was divorced, I think he would have more experience not to be subject to those pressures,

because it's likely he followed his family the first time around.

In any case, some of the posts by women who said to concentrate on yourself and what you want

to do are right on the money. Listen to that and go with your heart and give him room to breathe.

*American University of Beirut, Lebanon

[morocco4ever 63]

There is ANOTHER possibility that may or may not have anything to do with him being Moroccan.

He may have had an "unattainable" unrequited love that never showed interest in him, who suddenly

came out of the woodwork when it was announced that he was preparing to marry an American.

Also, there could be countless cousins, aunts & uncles who suddenly become matchmakers, with

the goal as "anything but a foreigner." You don''t know if he's under pressure or not and if he

is, he certainly wouldn't tell you, especially if he's never been married before and is relatively young.

Was this necessary? Seriously?

[Allie and Nigel 2]

I totally understand, I feel however, as a married couple, you still have to communicate on a daily basis, so whats the difference now? No matter what it is-and so be it by phone, a text, a nice card or letter in the mail, care package is always nice to send, I sent my other pillowcase off my bed to my fiance, so he has something of ours on his bed with him, we talk on skype at certain times and know when each other works and comes home and make the time to talk about stuff, flash eachother (hehe) who says you cant be a bit kinky you know! Make it fun! I think when a guy's brushing you off like that you have to put your foot down and say to them, that your not gonna wait and see by the puter when he comes on, make the time, make the effort and stick by it! Thats how it is in real life, why not in virtual life too? Also make him get his package 3 going. Print off all his papers and get your financial stuff ready and send all that stuff to him in a nice little packet ready to go, also go tell him to get his police/clearance thingie done too! That will keep him focused too! Also tell him how much the interview and medical will cost and where he goes for that, get him ready!