Fiancee (USC) has very strict parents.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

I guess you didn't ask for her hand in marriage from Pops.

NOT a very good start to a marriage.

I don't fancy waiting an eternity to marry her, and her father barely wants her getting married full stop. I'm sure we'll survive, but thanks for your concern.

Information provided has to be accurate. If her father is illegal I doubt it will cause any problems but that is something for him to consern himself with. She must be legally capable of being married in order to file a petition...that means "old enough". She doesn't need parent's permission and you already have another co-sponsor, so why not just announce the happy news? I mean this is a pretty grown up thing, getting married and what not, usually it is done by people that can discuss things as adults. Daddy will have to get over it.

[Marina-Del 10]

Agreed, as stated earlier there is nothing her parents can do to stop her. They, I suppose, could stop supporting her unless she pulls the application (and if they threatened that then just file using a third address!) but barring that type of blackmail there is nothing they can do.

It sounds like it might be best for you to have the ability to work when you enter the US so that you can help support her and yourself. In that case, you guys might be better off getting married either in the US on a tourist visa (AND NOT SAYING AFTER THE WEDDING, ONLY GETTING MARRIED AND THEN GOING BACK TO AUS) or her coming to Aus and you guys getting married there, then applying for the CR-1. Look at all options and as Kathryn suggested read the whole process from START TO FINISH.

And while I agree that a marriage in ultimately between a husband and a wife, the family of the two of you (espeically the ones that will live in the same country as you) will affect your marriage! Just read around this forum! There is no good reason that you've given so far why you should not tell her parents.

I don't know them or you, but you and your fiancee aren't being very mature doing everything behind their backs....

[Kathlyn and Tim 0]

How accurate do the details about parents have to be on the G-325A? My fiancee (USC) has really strict parents and is still currently living at home, they don't even know about this yet and if they did all hell would probably break loose. There's some details she doesn't know about her parents and it'd be really hard to ask without them getting kinda suspicious.

Also, her dad is originally from Honduras and she doesn't know if he's a US resident yet. If he's not and his details are put into the form, will it cause problems? He works in the US so I'm guessing it's all fine?

Ah, just go with your gut feeling. It sounds like she is the one who will be in charge of all of the paper work anyway. Just make sure she is over 18, otherwise she will have to have daddy and mommy's consent. Good Luck...

[Hagi 0]

Hi I understand your situation, I went through something similar with my wife. I even had to buy a stinking house in Turkey (I own it) before my father would give his daughter away...

I would not recommend you keep going this secret route though and advise you to push her to talk to her parents. Get your parents involved to talk to her parents or have her talk to her mom and her mom would ease telling the dad.

Of course, I don't know all the details of the situation. So do what you think is best, it just doesn't seem right to me though to do it like that. You should at least let her parents know and if they say no then secretly steel her and do the visa anyway. Then at least they will know where she went and with who and wont feel so betrayed. After time they'll come around, especially if you treat their daughter good and make her happy. Oh and don't forget to get the information out of them before you have to end up steeling the girl.

If it is meant to be it is, nothing can stop it. And if it isn't nothing can force it either... don't stress about it so much, I'm sure it will work out for the best for you two.

Edited September 1, 2009 by Hagi

[D&R 0]

I guess you didn't ask for her hand in marriage from Pops.

NOT a very good start to a marriage.

I don't fancy waiting an eternity to marry her, and her father barely wants her getting married full stop. I'm sure we'll survive, but thanks for your concern.

Wow! Are you seriously considering moving to America and marrying a girl without even telling her parents? I thought the gentlemanly thing to do was to her her father for his daughters hand in marriage. Even if he says no, at least you know you've done the right thing and can still marry her anyway. He'll at least respect you for that.

You say that he barely wants her marrying anyone. Perhaps this is because she's not yet mature enough to do so, and actually Daddy knows best. It's well worth taking the advice of parents and adults in important life changing decisions. He'll know his daughter better than you do (no matter what it feels like).

Sorry... just sounds a VERY bad why to start a life with someone. Prove to her dad (and your fiancee) that you're a man of morals and ask him for his daughters hand.

[Marina-Del 10]

I'm a bit with the OP on the issue of "asking the father for the daughters hand", this is quite old-fashioned. While I think asking her father for permission to marry her is nice and romantic, I don't think it's a requirement in this case really.

What I do think is a requirement is that the daughter talk to her parents and let them know what's going on. As someone else stated, maybe her dad doesn't want her to get married yet because he doesn't think she is mature enough. And the way I see it, not telling them is just proving that she's not mature enough!! And if you, the fiance, aren't insisting that she tell her parents, then you're not mature enough either!

Her parents need to be told because they WILL find out -either through the mail or when you show up in the US ready to marry their daughter. And if you are worried about them blackmailing her into not doing it (cutting her off or something like that) they can do that just as easily when you arrive in the US. They can tell her that they wont allow you to marry her after you've already spent thousands of dollars moving and changing your life completely. Or you guys could get married behind their back and then they can cut her off forever (not just money, but emotionally) and while you may think that she would be okay with that (maybe she thinks she would be okay with that too) she will regret it later on. Just tell them and get it over with now before it causes more problems.

[vareska 3]

The information required about the parents in the forms, from what I remember, asks for their DOB, place of birth, their address or if they deceased, the year they deceased, residency. Maybe social security, not sure...

Since your fiance is living under her parents' roof but is doing all this shady business behind their back, then I don't see why she hasn't gotten through their things and found their birth/marriage certificate to find out this information? Or does she think that would be unethical?

You two don't strike me as very mature, hopefully the interviewer doesn't come to the same conclusion and denies your visa!

maybe you shouldn't dismiss honesty, no matter how impossible it may seem at times.

I come from a veeeeeeeeery conservative and strict family, but I have been honest with my parents (live with them) every step of the way, no matter how big of a tear it made in our relationship at times, and it has made all the difference! They came to be a very big support system later in the process for us.

Best of luck to you!

[Sam and Ben 2]

No ages listed for either of you, but I gather from what you've said that, at the very least, your fiancee is in some sort of dependent relationship with her parents. Age aside, this brings up a few issues for you both.

If she is living with them, where will you live once you receive your visa? Will her parents welcome the surprise and accept you there? Or does she have a job in place where she could support you both (as you're looking at approximately three months before you can legally work and help provide)?

If she has been dependent thusfar and your surprise marriage/relocation to the States is going to provide additional strain on her relationship with her parents, are you going to be able to bear whatever may come along with that? Family stresses aren't usually fun to begin with, and with a process like this, any added stress can feel monumental to everyone involved.

I don't know what kind of problem her father's questioned legality will cause, but I do know that blanks on any of the forms will likely be flagged as incomplete, sent back to her and will cause a delay in the wait for retrieval of the missing information.

Though you weren't looking for advice here, as I myself (and my fiance, for that matter) am fairly young, I thought I'd give my two cents' worth. Marriage itself is a very adult thing, let alone everything else involved here. Though as a stubborn one myself at times, I welcome the "forget everyone else, we're doing this regardless" attitude, be sure you two can handle everything included in that.

Good luck to you both.

[newlyweds 0]

I guess you didn't ask for her hand in marriage from Pops.

NOT a very good start to a marriage.

The act of asking a parent for their daughters hand in marriage is not a common custom all over the world, it has no barring on how well a marriage will start..

wouldn't you think it feels much better to have their blessing and you 2 dont have to hide anything? and you know what, though her parents are so strict, you asking them let's them feel how much you respect them too, which will make them realize you have good intentions.(every parent will always wonder about the lover's interntions lol so dnt get offended ok? )

My parents are absolutely strict so I know what I'm talking about lol. My fiance and I actually tried talking about getting married in Japan and not telling the parents coz I know my dad would freak out about me getting married lol...

but we sucked it up and told them, and they were happy that we told him coz it implied their important to us, which made them become considerate actually..so give it a try, and talk to her dad, be humble enough and listen to him, and of course I know how much you love her so it's just a matter of letting him know how serious you really are.. and with the plans you have for her too.. My fiance did that, and well, my dad approved lol

but anyway, the G-325A only needs information about her parents they dont need to fill it out for her.

Edited September 2, 2009 by Michey and Odessa