emails from crazy people

[Amby 490]

holy sh*t...NO WAY!!!!!!!!!!

Can your baby get pregnant if you have sex while pregnant?

like if you are pregnant with a baby girl, and you have sex while you are pregnant, can the sperm go up in there and impregnate the baby?

Edited September 28, 2009 by Amby

[~*Maria*~ 1]

OMG!! you guys are a bunch of nutters!! you all just made my day

[ScottThuy 140]

And I thought A Cheese head was a football fan with a foam cheese hat...

[Amby 490]

I am honored that you chose my ad for a mini fridge out of all the ads you could have chosen. It makes me feel good that my mini fridge will be supplying you with the ice cold beverages you’ve obviously become accustomed to.

Next time you answer one of my ads, please note the following:

1. I am not Home Depot. If you travel thirty minutes to pick up a bulky 40-pound object, please come prepared with the necessary items you’ll need to secure it to your vehicle. Yes, I have rope. I have a lot of rope. I have many different colors and sizes of rope. No, you can not have my rope. The ad said I was selling a fridge, not a fridge with rope. Nor was I selling a fridge with padding so that the pleather seats on your piece of ####### car don’t get marked up.

2. What part of ‘buyer must pick up’ in the ad was confusing to you? Yes, I have a vehicle. No, I don’t want to haul your fridge all the way to East BumbleFuck on the hottest day of the year. No, I’m really really sure I don’t want to do that. No, really. I’m sure.

3. Please call me only once with ALL your questions. I left for the day, and had 5 messages on my answering machine, the last one was at 10:30 pm. Frankly lady, you were sounding a bit too crazy by the end of the day. It’s a fridge. A small metal box that keeps ###### cold. I don’t have the fridge’s family tree. For all I know the fridge’s was conceived by a slutty young Maytag that graced some hillbilly’s side porch. I don’t know the exact age of the fridge. I bought it a few months ago, I used it for a couple of days, ok, I lied, I used it a whole week. The fact is, you’re not buying a race horse, you’re buying a used fridge.

4. No, I will not knock $10 bucks off the price of the fridge because your ####### retentive eyes picked up the ittiest, bittiest hairline scratch from across my driveway. I’m not making judgements on you, but I’m pretty damn sure Donald Trump didn’t send you across the country to pick up a used fridge for Trump Towers. Though I’d wager the whole concept of the mini-fridge bar is a familar one to you.

5. Yes, you can unplug a fridge without any harm to the fridge. Believe me, the fridge is fine. The manufacturers have figured out a way to extend the life of a fridge that has been unplugged. Yes, I’m absolutely sure of that. No, you did not have to leave 2 messages about your concerns with the fridge being unplugged, and frankly it was a little embarrassing having the same conversation with you in my driveway where my neighbors could hear.

6. No, I don’t have the operating instructions. I can write them down for you though: Plug fridge in. Open door. Put ####### inside. Take ####### out when it’s cold. Eat or drink #######.

7. I am not a fridge pimp. I don’t have any more fridges at that price. No, I don’t know where you can get another fridge at that price. Yes, I know it’s in great condition for the price, and I’m sure you’d like your other crazy-as-bat-s***-mini-fridge-buying-friends to have one just like it, but this is all I have. Here’s a thought, there’s this online classified ads website. Yeah, you may have heard of it, it’s called CRAIGSLIST. I dunno, maybe, just maybe, in this great land of ours, there’s another mini-fridge being advertised there.

8. Please remove my phone number from your address book. I think our relationship is over. Oh, and if you’ve added me to your AIM Buddy List, please delete me. Please. I beg you.

Yours truly,

The mini-fridge seller

[Amby 490]

[Peikko 1,575]

[Nessa 23]

holy sh*t...NO WAY!!!!!!!!!!

Can your baby get pregnant if you have sex while pregnant?

like if you are pregnant with a baby girl, and you have sex while you are pregnant, can the sperm go up in there and impregnate the baby?

####### lollol

[EstebanTrabajos 7]

MY ALL-TIME FAVORITE, take that feminists!

Edited October 20, 2009 by TävôLuDô

[Chica Yeyé 41]

lolz --- you should post it ... never mind, I will

[The_Dude 1,142]

MY ALL-TIME FAVORITE, take that feminists!

Hijo de la chingada Tavo, you seriously made me cry laughing so hard.

[Amby 490]

Hi Rob,

Thanks so much for taking care of Rosie and Simba while I am gone!

Please follow these specific instructions for their care:

On Saturday morning please open a can of food for them (I will leave the can out on the cart in the kitchen). Put half the can of food in one of the bowls (I will also leave the bowls on the cart) and the other half in the other bowl. It is very important that they are EXACTLY equal amounts it there is any variance at all Rosie get very upset and becomes inconsolable. And you know what that means.

After you have put exactly half of the can in each bowl and then put one bowl in my bedroom on the green floral place mat for Rosie and the other bowl on the green floral placemat on the floor in the kitchen next to the Platinum Drinkwell water fountain. At this time check the fountain to make sure it is working properly. You may want to take a taste yourself to make sure it is at a cool enough temperature.

After the cats eat (at this time they are allowed to fraternize together in the liviging room but please leave Rosie by herself in my bedroom with the door closed when you leave otherwise the cats get into fights.) anyways, after they eat they like to be burped. This can be done by holding each cat like a baby on your shoulder and patting them gently, not too hard, until they burp twice. Each cat must burp twice. Sometimes it helps if you sing to them.

[Mephys 2]

Just passed the last hour reading this website.....it's hilarious!