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Malrothien

What do you say?

By Malrothien in Canada

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Malrothien Experienced

Malrothien   6

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Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Canada
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My best friend from high school is living a complete nightmare. Her cousin was kidnapped and murdered last year by a complete stranger. She's been attending the trail the past week and I have no idea what in the heck to say to her. Everything I try to send her just sounds so damn stupid and lame.

What in the world do you say to someone in bad situations?

Montreal: BEAT!!! Approved!!!!!

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Peachey Proficient

Peachey   10

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Filed: Lift. Cond. (pnd) Country: Canada
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Posted (edited)

"I'm here for you if you ever need anything"?

I've never been in that situation.

Or maybe you can just be a good friend, go out to dinner, do fun stuff. To keep her mind of things kinda deal.

Edited by Peachey

12/31/2009 - Marriage

07/21/2010 - AOS approved

08/04/2010 - Green Card received (and it's actually green!)

05/30/2012 - Sent ROC packet to VSC

06/08/2012 - Received NOA1 for ROC (Dated 06/04/2012)

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canadian_wife Grand Master

canadian_wife   1,822

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Canada
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Posted (edited)

Maybe you don't need to say anything. Maybe, in this situation, actions speak louder than words. Stock her fridge with yummy treats, wash her bathroom (who wants to do that anyway let alone during a difficult time), mow her lawn. She'll appreciate your efforts.

I'm sorry for your friend's situation, I can't imagine how painful it must be

Good luck.

Edited by canadian_wife

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Waited...

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Peachey Proficient

Peachey   10

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Filed: Lift. Cond. (pnd) Country: Canada
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I forgot to mention that - I'm on the other side of the country from her right now. :(

I live really far enough away from my best friend and when she had a bad couple of days last week I sent her flowers. She was so happy, she even cried she was so happy. That's something you can do, and on the card just put something like "Think of you", or "With Love" your name.

12/31/2009 - Marriage

07/21/2010 - AOS approved

08/04/2010 - Green Card received (and it's actually green!)

05/30/2012 - Sent ROC packet to VSC

06/08/2012 - Received NOA1 for ROC (Dated 06/04/2012)

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Malrothien Experienced

Malrothien   6

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Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Canada
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I forgot to mention that - I'm on the other side of the country from her right now. :(

I live really far enough away from my best friend and when she had a bad couple of days last week I sent her flowers. She was so happy, she even cried she was so happy. That's something you can do, and on the card just put something like "Think of you", or "With Love" your name.

That's a wonderful idea, thank you, Peachey!

Montreal: BEAT!!! Approved!!!!!

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TimandJoyce Proficient

TimandJoyce   1

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Filed: Lift. Cond. (apr) Country: Canada
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[quote name='Peachey' date='Aug 27 2009, 06:57 PM' post='3260206'

I live really far enough away from my best friend and when she had a bad couple of days last week I sent her flowers. She was so happy, she even cried she was so happy. That's something you can do, and on the card just put something like "Think of you", or "With Love" your name.

That's a really good idea. There are lots of sites that let you send gifts to people. Just let her know your sorry for her situation and that you're sending her thoughts and hugs. It must be horrible what she's going through. I couldn't imagine it. Let her know you're a phone call away if she needs to talk.

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Anh map Grand Master

Anh map   2,098

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Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Vietnam
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Posted (edited)

Murder trials are a surreal event. Just let your friend know that you're thinking of her. Pick up the phone and say "hi." When you're in the middle of such things, it's good to know the rest of the world still exists. Don't worry about sounding "lame." It won't be taken that way.

Edited by Anh map

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minnew Proficient

minnew   4

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Filed: Lift. Cond. (apr) Country: Canada
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A nice card with a handwritten note, just to say that you are thinking of her during this difficult time. I am so sorry for your friend and her cousin. (F)

AOS

Sent- 10-21-09

Tracking says Delivered by USPS-10-23-09

Check cashed-10-30-09 (MSC case # on back)

NOA 1 date-10-29-09 (Received Date 10-23-09)

Hard copy NOA - 11-02-09

Touch- 11-03-09

Received bio appt letter-11-07-09(dated 11-03-09)

Bio appt- 11-19-09

Transfer to CSC-11-18-09

Touch on 485/765- 11-19-09

Touch on 485/765- 11-20-09

Hard copy of transfer to CSC- 11-23-09

Touch on 485- 11-24-09 (now processing @ CSC email)

Touch on 485- 11-25-09

Touch on 485- 11-27-09

Touch on 485- 11-30-09

Touch on 485- 12-01-09

Touch on 485- 12-02-09

Touch on 485- 12-03-09

EAD/AP approved-12-18-09

EAD/AP touch- 12-21-09

GC APPROVED!!- 12-21-09

Notice mailed welcoming PR-12-21-09

2nd Card Production ordered email-12-22-09

Approval notice sent-12-28-09

GC arrived in the mail-01-05-10

Done with USCIS until September 14, 2011!!

ROC

Sent: 09-14-11

Received: 09-16-11

Check cashed: 09-21-11

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Carlawarla Mentor

Carlawarla   1

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Filed: Lift. Cond. (apr) Country: Canada
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I'm so sorry to hear of your cousins ordeal. Don't be afraid to say what you've said here...that you know she's been living a nightmare, and you have no idea what to say. Just tell her that, and that you're thinking of her. Be a good listener and let her know you're there to listen if she needs to talk.

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Krikit Grand Master

Krikit   1,164

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Filed: Timeline
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:o

OMG, that's horrible!

I send "Thinking of you" cards. They have really nice ones that have words of encouragement and love. I just tell them that I am really sorry for all they are going through and that I am here if they need to talk or get away. The feedback I get from them and/or their spouses ends up making me feel better too. It's a way to show them that you care and that you're thinking of them, but not in a way which is intrusive. Hugs to you, Malrothien. (F)

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Malrothien Experienced

Malrothien   6

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Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Canada
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Thanks again, everyone. :) I'll be sending her a note next week. The trial is over (Krikit, I'm sure you've heard of it, actually) and he was found guilty of all charges (Thank God).

Montreal: BEAT!!! Approved!!!!!

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