I am sad to say....

[cheeky^Wolf 0]

Wow - if you have doubts THAT big you should think about this seriously. This is MARRIAGE...a huge deal and it's based on trust. This isn't the first post I've seen from you where you have questioned your fiance and his dependability.

Read the post today from...silverbuttlerfly I think...her fiance was also not cooperative or helpful and they called theirs off. I'm not saying to do that but think seriously if this is the man with whom you really want to spend the rest of your life.

You seem to have serious doubts.

Having read previous posts of yours, I felt the same. If you're not 100% sure, maybe the RFE & lack of divorce papers are a sign.

Good luck in whatever you decide.

Helen

[meauxna 15]

You should ask yourself why a man that claims to be divorced is having his mother mail items that are his responsibility.

A: Because he's Greek!

(Greek men are famous for having their mother do everything for them)

B, look into an extension for VSC, go on your trip and have some heart to heart. Things went fast and then came to a grinding halt. There's nothing wrong with spending a bit of time on this.

[Sacha 0]

Good luck Bridgitt.

You should contact VSC and see if they will give you an extension, I'm sure they would be fine with this.

[Erik 0]

Sorry to hear about this I wish you the best of luck. Things do sound a bit strange, especially if you told him you needed those papers ASAP or you'd have to start all over. If someone wants to be with someone bad enough, and have been apart for quite sometime, it's just odd that they would handle the situation this way. But, I hope for the best for you, and hopefully it's just him being laid back/lazy.

I guess the bright side, is you get to file in Vermont, which means even if you start over it shouldn't take that long... I'm willing to be you could start over and get approved before the majority of us folks stuck at CSC get an approval.

Good luck, and enjoy your trip, hopefully everything will be fine

[Bunnyqr 0]

I took the advice given to me and I called the service center today. I explained the situation and they told me to make a copy of the RFE notice and write a letter requesting an extension and Fed Ex to Vermont.

So I did, I felt better just knowing that in this difficult situation I can at least attempt to do something to try and give us more time. There are no guarantees that they will give us the extension but at least I can say I tried.

So I made my copies, wrote the letter and Fed Ex'd it tonight. It will be delivered Friday AM.

Thank you all for your support, concern and advice.

My brain is all scrambled about this and I love him and I know he loves me.

All of this is my fears coming to the surface that I may lose him. Also, we are both at two extremes on how we live our lives. He is veeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrryyyyyyyyyy laid back and I am veeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy task oriented and #######. I will go to Greece and talk about this. Because this is the one thing about his character that gets under my skin. I want us to discuss how we can find the middle ground, meet half way. I will learn to loosen up but I need him to meet me half way.

I will keep you posted on what happens.

All of your positive thoughts are needed.

Thank you everyone!!!!!

[gugu24 0]

hi how are you i remmember you once getting pissed of at your fiance few weeks back. well i would say not everyting is right in this case. dont go for the signs but go for the realities. how much do you love him and how much does he love you. you can find out by many signs during your whole relationship period. dont go for the mushy mushy silky silky e-mails and ph calls between you and him but go for the practicle steps which he took for you and you took for him. i am telling you these things that i have gone throug same and exact problems of divorce things.

yes i met my beloved in 2003 talked online she got divorce from mexico court. it was final decree. we filed the I-130 in tokyo. but they denied our case after 17 months of waitting on the basis of the unlawful divorce. well at that time w had already become thriangle means me, her and our daughter. the day we got the notice of denieng we were in japan all three of us she had left usa many months before but instead of getting panicked and pissed of at each other, my honey made ph call from tokyo to usa to an unkown lawyer not even from her city. we told him how she got divorce from mexico court and we amrriewd in new york. he said the divrce was not valid and needed to be divorced one more time. well on the same ph call we paid him 2500$ on the spot(credit card) without any contract or anything written and asked him to start the divrce process again. it was july 27th we paid him money and just told her name and her ex-husband name on teleph and on november 27th she got leagl and authentic divorce from NY suppreme court. it did cost us around 5000$ in four months but we were lucky that he was a very profesional lawyer and we got it done in less than average time bcz we trusted at him right on the ph and didnt like to waste a single day more he had realized it too.

now our k-1 pettitn in the final stage. approved from vsc and now i have sent my original passport, orignal docs and everything to the tokyo USA embassy. and i hope inshallah we would get any answer soon.

sorrry for long story but the reason of telling you is that during all this irdeal we were standing side by side shoulder to shoulder. so i would simply suggest you that dont get emotional and think for a moment what he can do for you to be with you without relying on his stupid mother dont rush and run to greek wait for the answer from immigration about your rfe. lets see what do they say. then make your mind. you face problems but it doesnt mean you loode your control. in difficult time you come to know who can stand besides you

[meauxna 15]

B, glad to hear of your plans!

For the rest of us: look, this is what happens when you put your personal life out there for others to discuss---it gets discussed. That doesn't mean that your opinions are not valid, but remember that we do not have all the information---we have B's thoughts when she was feeling nervous, insecure, upset or unsure.

I'm only butting in because of my knowledge of living in Greece as an American---we are different. Greeks are also differernt than Pakistan people, Japanese people, UK etc etc etc. It's really not fair of us to compare our relationships with others and find the other lacking. Remember the most important things about relationships is that they are the agreements made *between those two people in it*. We don't really know what was said/done by MrBunny or his Mana and while I can laugh about Greek mothers, maybe even that wasn't fair.

I think B summed it up well when she saw their different personalities; it's just one of those things that they will work out in their own way.

Yeah, I'm riffing off of another post today, but give them all a break, OK?

[Erik 0]

Glad to hear you might be able to get some sort of extension, hopefully that will work out and all will be well.

I certainly hope that the only issue here is personality difference for you two. My fiance is from Brasil, and they are extremely laid back as well and take things in stride (well at least my fiance does). I am also very detailed (perfectionist), goal oriented, and yes at times ####### about getting things done properly, and expediciously, American curse I guess.

We have bumped heads about this on a few things during our relationship, however never when it came to anything regarding the Visa. Being laid back, and or lazy is one thing, but when it comes to something so important, and something you both desperately want, it just doesn't add up (well at least it doesn't in my head, but thats not really saying a lot ).

I certainly hope everything works out for the best for you and him, even if it takes a little bit longer. Hopefully this Visa nightmare will be over for you and your fiance very soon.