to become an american citizen or not

[Galateia 1]

Like I said in the co-worker thread, I've taken up drinking to cope. I am not kidding. I'm now at the stage where I'm considering swapping Bailey's for creamer in my morning coffee. I cried on and off for about two hours this morning while at work, including right in front of my boss. Woo!

And we're trapped here for at least another three years, then we'll be trapped in another part of Texas for another 2-3 years. This May will be 2 years here, so no, I didn't "just move here".

[Wyatt's Torch 45]

Like I said in the co-worker thread, I've taken up drinking to cope. I am not kidding. I'm now at the stage where I'm considering swapping Bailey's for creamer in my morning coffee. I cried on and off for about two hours this morning while at work, including right in front of my boss. Woo!

And we're trapped here for at least another three years, then we'll be trapped in another part of Texas for another 2-3 years. This May will be 2 years here, so no, I didn't "just move here".

That doesn't sound healthy. How come you're "trapped"?

[Galateia 1]

Because this is where he got his graduate offer. 3 years left (if we're lucky) and then 2-3 years under contract with the AF in one of the bases near here. The universe may invert and we'll be sent to a different state, but based on the fact that here is where they work with his speciality almost exclusively, that's where they'll send him.

The acceptance rate for grads in his field, according to google, ranges between 1-5% of applicants getting an offer somewhere. The year he applied, it was 3%. He was lucky enough to be among that 3%, but it means we had zero choice about where we went.

[lgg 2]

Wow. You really should take some stock into what you want and where you're going if you're starting to drink in the morning.

No offense? but I'm tired of people living in a first world country with enough food and shelter and love complaining so bitterly when there are others who have none of the above.

really?

Wow. I just want to say that I find it shocking. How bad can it possibly be that you can't find any happiness or joy where you are? There is some everywhere ESPECIALLY where t here is food and shelter and love. Go and find it and stop putting Bailey's in your morning coffee... American, Canada I am reluctant to offend either side as there is good in both.

Geez.

[Wyatt's Torch 45]

Wow. You really should take some stock into what you want and where you're going if you're starting to drink in the morning.

No offense? but I'm tired of people living in a first world country with enough food and shelter and love complaining so bitterly when there are others who have none of the above.

really?

Wow. I just want to say that I find it shocking. How bad can it possibly be that you can't find any happiness or joy where you are? There is some everywhere ESPECIALLY where t here is food and shelter and love. Go and find it and stop putting Bailey's in your morning coffee... American, Canada I am reluctant to offend either side as there is good in both.

Geez.

I'm of the same mind, really. I mean, I'm sympathetic in a way...but if you're resorting to drink -- AND acknowledging that fact -- then you should probably have a long discussion with your husband. Moving back to Canada is always an option...but obviously there are downsides to that too (i.e.: you'd go back to a visit-based relationship).

I don't know where you live or what you do for a living, but I've always felt that "home" is a rather flexible concept...and mostly psychological.

There are going to be things I'll miss about Vancouver. I've spent two thirds of my life in the area, and my entire life in this province. But I also know that I'm going to enjoy living in Washington D.C., primarily because that's where my wife is...and secondarily because I know I'll be able to psychologically adjust my notion of "home" to equal Washington.

Bottom line for you is this, though -- if you're aware that you're turning to booze to "cope", then why are you still doing it? It almost sounds like a willful chemical dependency, rather than a more subconscious one. Every step of this journey has been your choice. And THAT never changes. If it's so hard for you to be where you are, then find a way out. It's a balance.

[Galateia 1]

Allow me to clarify that I am not becoming a drunk or a hysterical mess due to homesickness. I'm not saying that Canada is the Land of Milk and Honey and that I just looooong to go back.

I am just reaching my breaking point on being where we are. However, being without my husband is unthinkable, so, here I am. And here I'll remain, until he's also free to go elsewhere. I have contemplated perhaps seeking medical help to deal with my raging depression, however chemical aids meant for chemical ailments cannot help with circumstantial depression.

However, I am tired of hearing secondhand about how I am a lesbian (I'm married), how I wear no panties, ever (I've never gone without underwear in my life), how I might be an atheist ("She says she's not, but does she go to Church? HMMMM? I think that speaks for itself!"), etc etc etc. Tired of constantly overhearing discriminatory remarks on religion, race, sexual preference, politics, social classes, etc. Tired of having no other option.

But as I said, here is where my husband must stay, so where he is, I'll have to be until something breaks or we make it through the next 6 years.

[Sprailenes 47]

Wow. No one is worth that in my opinion... not even a man. You must really love him Galateia because if I hated it somewhere as much as that, I'd be high tailing it home. My sanity, my happiness, balance... those are all so precious to me.

Everything we do... is a choice. Just saying. I hope you find happiness soon.

Edited February 12, 2010 by Sprailenes

[bowflex 0]

I'd actually recommend trying to take some type of therapy where you wouldn't be prescribed drugs but maybe could talk things out and just get it out of your system. The situation sounds awful but that may help. I wish ya good luck as that's definitely no way to live!

[lgg 2]

Whoa.

You don't wear panties?

*shrugs*

[Peachey 10]

Whoa.

You don't wear panties?

*shrugs*

I think she meant she always wears panties...

This place hasn't become my home either, and I don't think it will happen until I have kids.

[Sprailenes 47]

I've been here for over two years now and it's starting to feel like home.

Sure I miss things about Canada, but if I left here there would be a lot of things I would miss about here as well.

Like wawa. I couldn't live without my wawa.

No, I'm serious.

Edited February 12, 2010 by Sprailenes

[Peachey 10]

There's a wawa at the end of our street. I love Wawa too

[Udella&Wiz 325]

Allow me to clarify that I am not becoming a drunk or a hysterical mess due to homesickness. I'm not saying that Canada is the Land of Milk and Honey and that I just looooong to go back.

I am just reaching my breaking point on being where we are. However, being without my husband is unthinkable, so, here I am. And here I'll remain, until he's also free to go elsewhere. I have contemplated perhaps seeking medical help to deal with my raging depression, however chemical aids meant for chemical ailments cannot help with circumstantial depression.

However, I am tired of hearing secondhand about how I am a lesbian (I'm married), how I wear no panties, ever (I've never gone without underwear in my life), how I might be an atheist ("She says she's not, but does she go to Church? HMMMM? I think that speaks for itself!"), etc etc etc. Tired of constantly overhearing discriminatory remarks on religion, race, sexual preference, politics, social classes, etc. Tired of having no other option.

But as I said, here is where my husband must stay, so where he is, I'll have to be until something breaks or we make it through the next 6 years.

Your current work is definitely not the right place for you. It is sucking anything positive that you have left right out of you. and how could you know it wasn't the right place until you'd worked there a while, right? Now sounds like the time to try a job search. Put out a few resumes and see if anyone bites. You've been there a couple years, maybe there is somewhere else you can try? I can't remember whether you've said there are other opportunities or not or how big the town is.

You have culture shock girl and rightfully so. Where I live in Virginia, I hear a lot more racist, religious, generally discriminatory comments in the work place then I ever did in Canada.....it'd down right offensive and I wish people at my work would realize how offensive it is.

PS - I would confront the whole lot of them in one shot and tell them off - tell them you've heard people commenting on these various topics and that they have no right too and that they've hurt your feels and THAT isn't very Christian......hit'm right where it hurts sweetie

Edited February 12, 2010 by Udella&Wiz

[CDAgirlMI 51]

Wow...this thread has taken a turn since I last viewed it

I've only been here(US) for about 7 weeks. There have been days where I miss home, but in the end I made a choice. I made a choice to come here & live the rest of my life here. I understand people deal with things differently than others.

[Udella&Wiz 325]

Wow...this thread has taken a turn since I last viewed it

I've only been here(US) for about 7 weeks. There have been days where I miss home, but in the end I made a choice. I made a choice to come here & live the rest of my life here. I understand people deal with things differently than others.

Not to be snotty - but as time passes, you may feel differently. I was pretty ok around 2 months, but things change and evolve. I haven't seen my family in 18 months due to some child issues...I never thought that would happen either And yes - I made the choice