My wife doesn't like to have sex or approach me for sex ?

[Mrs. Disney 0]

Call her father and see how her mother acts?? the apple may not fall far from the tree.

I'm sure that's something that every father would love to hear from their son-in-law. "Your daughter doesn't put out, is her mother frigid too?"

That was funny!

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

Call her father and see how her mother acts?? the apple may not fall far from the tree.

I'm sure that's something that every father would love to hear from their son-in-law. "Your daughter doesn't put out, is her mother frigid too?"

That was funny!

Not that funny. Father-in-law's are quite understanding, as long as you promise his daughter will not go crying home to mother.

[Jamie Lee 1]

SERIOUSLY EVERYONE! This Guy has a reasonable concern, and we shouldn't knock him for it.

This thing that all of us are doing or have done is not in the eyes of the world "normal". It is a highly stressful, emotionally consuming, life altering change we make, and we are happy to be with our loved one. After years of working toward something, I think people need a little time to come down off the high and craziness that is planning a life with someone that we've actually NEVER lived with for longer than a month or so at a time. Every time we meet our spouses while apart, we are on vacation, or a least so FRICKIN excited that we are with each other, we don't really realize what real life with them will be like. You have to remember that once you are married, you vow to work out these problems. Planning a wedding from another country is hard and changing your whole life is a really big deal. I can understand where she's coming from. You need to reboot your body and recollect your thoughts, and get back to real life...something neither of you had for a long time. It will get better, and you need to understand that this is a crazy time for her, and that is probably the last thing on her mind right now.

So please talk to her about it. You have had to learn to communicate with each other over thousands of miles, now sit in the same room and talk about it face to face. Nothing will get resolved unless you work at it. Dating is fun, Marriage is work, work we love.

My grandparents and their siblings were all married over 50 years, through the Great Depression and WW2, you think they didn't have problems? But you make a commitment to be married to your other half, you work it out.

Good luck to you, and don't listen to all the jerks that make you feel bad for your situation.

We should all have a little understanding and be helpful, that is what this site is for.

[Old Dominion 26]

I agree -- talk it over patiently and lovingly. If necessary, put up a bit of money for medical help even if she's not on your health insurance. It's all about health -- emotional and medical, and that intangible which we call "relationship."

[bulaklak 0]

My wife doesn't like to have sex or approach me for sex ?

First how's your health? perhaps your wife is NOT attracted to you? or you are TOO selfish in bed and she grow tired of it?

[brownnskinn 0]

Hi, Help

Just got married 1 month now. K1 My wife doesn't like to have sex or approach me for sex ?

Don't know what the problem is don't know what to do. I cant live like this some days I don't know if I should go home

she is piss off at what I don't know.

For how long? She could be experiencing some degree of Depression. Maybe she should talk to a professional, to see what could be bothering her?

[lechatnoir 0]

Wow! This thread is quite odd... sure he may have a valid concern...but come on... someone doesn't get the amount of sex that they want for a few months and then its OMG DIVORCE, OMG SCAM, OMG SHE'S USING YOU! Sex is not everything... and if you think it is...then you're not really living. FIrst, you're saying that you only visited this person every so often for a few weeks at a time. Of course you're gonna have more sex with that person because you don't see them every day all day 24/7. And second she probably has way more things on her mind and trying to get accomplished then satisfying your dumb stick... And I also thought the comments about marrying an american woman so you can "get it all the time" or marrying a foreigner cause they put out more is just silly.

I married a guy from Denmark and its actually so nice not to have the pressure that american men put on you about constantly having to perform. Yes, I like sex.... but not every damn day. American men would probably love to have "do you promise to love, honor and screw your husband into marriage vows.

Your wife could be suffering from a lot of things unrelated to the fact she simply isn't attracted to you or she only married you for a green card. Perhaps you aren't affectionate enough, perhaps she feels too pressured by you, perhaps she's going through a lot of stress from moving....etc...etc...I find it odd that a lot of people are strictly blaming the woman in this case. Perhaps he's mean to her...perhaps he is acting differently towards her now that she is here than when they were dating.

And that other comment about "what other wifely duties is she not performing".... what year are we living in?

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

[KarenCee 3]

My birth control has messed with me in that aspect before.

She should talk to her doctor about it and maybe switch brands.

What does she need birth control for anyway?

Truly not anyone's business...least of all yours.

smell the coffee It is very obvious you have been used.

....and you have proof of this how?

To the OP...if you are still reading this thread: Please have your wife talk to her doctor about the meds. It is quite possible that the BC medication is definitely messing with her sex drive and/or hormones. Please have patience with her as well. Don't base your whole marriage on this one aspect. Marriage is far more than that

[Nessa 23]

lol since someone brought this thread up i have 2 possible solutions:

1 - ship her back to her country and ask for a refund.

2 - check out those spam e-mails u get. maybe an enlargement will help?

[Rocky_nBullwinkle 6]

Wow! This thread is quite odd... sure he may have a valid concern...but come on... someone doesn't get the amount of sex that they want for a few months and then its OMG DIVORCE, OMG SCAM, OMG SHE'S USING YOU! Sex is not everything... and if you think it is...then you're not really living. FIrst, you're saying that you only visited this person every so often for a few weeks at a time. Of course you're gonna have more sex with that person because you don't see them every day all day 24/7. And second she probably has way more things on her mind and trying to get accomplished then satisfying your dumb stick... And I also thought the comments about marrying an american woman so you can "get it all the time" or marrying a foreigner cause they put out more is just silly.

I married a guy from Denmark and its actually so nice not to have the pressure that american men put on you about constantly having to perform. Yes, I like sex.... but not every damn day. American men would probably love to have "do you promise to love, honor and screw your husband into marriage vows.

Your wife could be suffering from a lot of things unrelated to the fact she simply isn't attracted to you or she only married you for a green card. Perhaps you aren't affectionate enough, perhaps she feels too pressured by you, perhaps she's going through a lot of stress from moving....etc...etc...I find it odd that a lot of people are strictly blaming the woman in this case. Perhaps he's mean to her...perhaps he is acting differently towards her now that she is here than when they were dating.

And that other comment about "what other wifely duties is she not performing".... what year are we living in?

Sex is the consummation of marriage. One of the reasons why people get married -- procreation(sex).

[ya falaha! 0]

Hmm I could say the same about why American women marry foreign men. However, I did marry for the sexy accent.

Hi, Help

Just got married 1 month now. K1 My wife doesn't like to have sex or approach me for sex ?

Don't know what the problem is don't know what to do. I cant live like this some days I don't know if I should go home

she is piss off at what I don't know.

That is why the American men marry foreign women. And you thought it was because we liked exotic accents?

[lechatnoir 0]

Sex is the consummation of marriage. One of the reasons why people get married -- procreation(sex).

Thank you for the dictionary definition there. I didn't ask what the definition of consummation was. I also didn't say sex was pointless or irrelevant. I said it wasn't EVERYTHING. And if you base a marriage strictly on sex or procreation...then, well good luck to that marriage.

And if your definition of sex and marriage is strictly for procreation then maybe you should be a scientologist... they only have sex when they are trying to make a baby. And the OP said his wife was on birth control... so they obviously not trying to have a baby.

[foxtobee 1]

My birth control has messed with me in that aspect before.

She should talk to her doctor about it and maybe switch brands.

What does she need birth control for anyway?

Truly not anyone's business...least of all yours.

smell the coffee It is very obvious you have been used.

....and you have proof of this how?

To the OP...if you are still reading this thread: Please have your wife talk to her doctor about the meds. It is quite possible that the BC medication is definitely messing with her sex drive and/or hormones. Please have patience with her as well. Don't base your whole marriage on this one aspect. Marriage is far more than that

There are a lot of options why things are not going the way you expected. I know the bc you mentioned is a libido killer...I used to use and found out the difference fast. A woman that doesn't engage in a sexual relationship, does have many reasons. Going throught the stress of the move is one. Maybe she enetered the marriage as a virgin (which is still possible in many cultural or religious background, no matter what anyone's opinion is). Maybe she had negative sexual experiences as a child (abuse). The main thing is that you need to take the time to talk to her, not accuse her, be angry and yell at her. That can be very hurtful and create the oposite effect.

Sex is so personal and trust is the main factor to make things work. Patience is the key, but find a way to make yourself heard as well as listening to what she needs. Learning to really trust eachother to the fullest and most intimate parts of life is a growing process. Some people grow fast, some need time.

[Big Papa Zone 93]

My birth control has messed with me in that aspect before.

My birth control makes my nuts shrivel to the size of raisins. It sucks.