Yardies at Home and a Farrin (part17)

[*JG* 2]

Ok ladies... I am back. I'm gonna look back a few pages to see what I've missed.

As for me, all is well over here. Derron still working, thankfully... I'm still working. Bills are getting paid. Adjustments, well, they come and go. (Oh, FYI, Derron is now thinking of getting himself a "refurbished" iphone!! I'm proud of him for considering that.) But for the most part, we are doing well.

Had a great time this weekend!! Quana... tell Roger THANKS for convincing Derron to go out on Saturday. Even though we weren't there very long, we had a great time!!! Are you goin to the the concert on Saturday??? AND, I was thinking of making it to Lover's Rock on Thursday, since Derron don't have to work on Friday... what you think?

OK.. i'm off to read... brb

JaP... beautiful words!!

I buy only refurbished phones when I want one. We are hard on phones.

So far, we've bought 4 of them and they are just fine. My latest is a refurb blackberry I got for $59. LOVE it.

Hey Bunzarelli, we got our visia back in 3 days. So Sunday is on...

Roxcie and Joel

Sunday? Leaving JA?

Congrats, Rox.

[sus 70]

Sus...why don't you find him a cheap villa with maid in Ochi for a week...the maid/housekeeper may be able to look after him. I know extravagant...but you may be able to find something.

Jawi, I thought about that - But he has his apartment, for which he already paid the rent - He's going to call his landlord today and see if she can find someone to help him - she has a woman that cleans around the property - it would be a lot cheaper than a villa -

[finesse 3]

morning

sus - nice to hear dj is doing better...and you can actually communicate with him!

[*JG* 2]

I am taking my son to meet his kindergarten teacher at 11am

Tomorrow my baby starts kindergarten

Awwwwwwww well im on the road to becoming a teacher. I start my practicum in the fall with Kindergarden... this should be fun!

I am taking my son to meet his kindergarten teacher at 11am

Tomorrow my baby starts kindergarten

i went through that last year with my son i feel your pain . my oldest starts 6th grade and im crying over that

My baby starts ninth grade and Im STILL emotional! lol

My oldest graduates this year. I'll be a mess at the graduation!

[JAPrincess 27]

Morning Ya'll

Dillon, I thought about you all night

Here is some info I googled today:

Getting to know you 101

Although you love your new partner, you may not automatically love his children, and they may not automatically love you. It takes time for people to establish positive, trusting relationships and to develop a family history.

You will increase the chances of creating strong relationships by thinking about what the children need. Age, gender and personality are not irrelevant, but all children have some basic needs and wants that should be met as a precursor to a great relationship.

Children want to feel:

Safe and secure – Children want to be able to count on their parents. Children of divorce have already felt the upset of having people let them down, and may not be eager to give second chances to their parents or stepparents.

Loved – Kids like to see and feel your affection, although it should be a gradual process.

Seen and Valued – Kids often feel unimportant or invisible when it comes to decision making in the new blended family. Recognize their integral role in the family when you are making decisions.

Heard and emotionally connected to – Kids are eager for real connection and understanding. Creating an honest and open environment free of judgment will help them feel heard. Show them that you can view the situation from their perspective.

Appreciated and encouraged – Children of all ages respond to praise and encouragement and like to feel appreciated for their contribution.

Limits and boundaries – Children may not think they need limits, but a lack of boundaries sends a signal that the child is unworthy of the parents’ time, care and attention. As a new stepparent, you shouldn’t step in as the enforcer at first, but work with your spouse to set limits.

Amazon.com has a ton of books on helping kids cope in blended families and helping them express their feelings

http://www.amazon.com/Have-New-Family-Now-...g/dp/0570050391

I you both. Please take time

[*JG* 2]

dillon

What's up?

I think she is the

M's son is here now and she is even ruder, meaner and nastier to him than she is Mikel. Everything that I do to correct the behavior isn't working. I feel like I am beating my head agains the wall with her.

Awwwwww, hugs, Dillon. She's jealous of not getting all the attention anymore.

[JAPrincess 27]

One next thing from google:

Co-parenting requires cooperation between the responsible parents and it requires consistent discipline. Blending a family is not easy. Some children will test the relationship between a man and woman. They will break the rules, ask for exceptions and challenge parents to make a choice between them and the other parent. Children need guidance, instruction, training, choices, consequences and supervision. These are roles that any caring and responsible adult can provide. Regardless of the approach to parenting, couples should never threaten the bonds between a parent and their child.

from here: http://www.crisiscounseling.com/Articles/BlendedFamilies.htm

[*JG* 2]

i am trying to hang in there. i haven't spoken to her tonight and she knows to stay away. i have been crying a lot tonightg and have just been in my room thinking about what i can do to change her behavior.

Dillon, she's been through a lot since you started this process too. She went from being the center of your attention to not in a pretty short time. She has this new man in her life when she hasn't really known a father figure in her life, right? And, now the little boy. It's a lot for a child to take in all at once.

You need to just keep reinforcing that you love her and how important she will always be to you and the family. But, also how important Mikel and his son are as well. And, you do have to continue to punish her for bad behavior. She has to know what is unacceptable.

If all else fails, you may have to get her a little therapy to deal with it all.

I'm sorry, girlie. I wish you only the best here.

[JAPrincess 27]

Good morning all! Just got off the phone with DJ - He now has a working phone again - The doctor says he can go home tomorrow - But now comes the chaos of where is he going to go - He will need help for a week or so at least, and I am not that comfy with him going to Ochi by himself - but I doubt he would be able to get up the hill to his mom's house -

Sus

[*JG* 2]

LOL Nat that is the funniest thing I have heard. It is one in the same....they have a love hate releationship and this week has been very hard because his son is here now. So even more change in her life. I know this will pass but right now it is very hard. So they answer to your question is I only have one daughter.

Ha ha....only ONE. You thinking Sybil here? One daughter, multiple personalities!

Dang. I just realized that if I had got the Continental MasterCard before I booked these last 8 trips to Jamaica on my Southwest Visa, I'd have an extra 8000 miles or so with Continental.

I'm disappointed that Continental charges so much for a one-way from MBJ to Houston. It comes to $461 with taxes & fees! It's $507 roundtrip.

The best one-way deal is flying American Airlines. It comes to $295 one-way, $433 roundtrip.

AA (layover in Miami): $728 total

Continental (direct flight): $968 total

Wow. That's a $240 difference if we rather take less desirable flights with a layovers, instead of a direct flight. Hmm...

Miami is not so bad for a layover.

[JAPrincess 27]

i am trying to hang in there. i haven't spoken to her tonight and she knows to stay away. i have been crying a lot tonightg and have just been in my room thinking about what i can do to change her behavior.

Dillon, she's been through a lot since you started this process too. She went from being the center of your attention to not in a pretty short time. She has this new man in her life when she hasn't really known a father figure in her life, right? And, now the little boy. It's a lot for a child to take in all at once.

You need to just keep reinforcing that you love her and how important she will always be to you and the family. But, also how important Mikel and his son are as well. And, you do have to continue to punish her for bad behavior. She has to know what is unacceptable.

If all else fails, you may have to get her a little therapy to deal with it all.

I'm sorry, girlie. I wish you only the best here.

[*JG* 2]

Glad to be at least far enough along in this journey to be able to help others. I feel like we're dancing the cha cha.... or whatever that dance is where people are in a line and have their hands on the waist of the person in front and move about. You know. You do this dance on cruises at midnight a lot.

I want to go on a cruise.

My sister turns 25 in January and is having a birthday cruise. I'm not going, though, since I doubt we'll have AP by then.

Time for bed. I feel rambly. Good night.

Conga line?

[JAPrincess 27]

LOL Nat that is the funniest thing I have heard. It is one in the same....they have a love hate releationship and this week has been very hard because his son is here now. So even more change in her life. I know this will pass but right now it is very hard. So they answer to your question is I only have one daughter.

Ha ha....only ONE. You thinking Sybil here? One daughter, multiple personalities!

unno leave mi sweet likkle girl alone man... cho!

[*JG* 2]

Good morning all! Just got off the phone with DJ - He now has a working phone again - The doctor says he can go home tomorrow - But now comes the chaos of where is he going to go - He will need help for a week or so at least, and I am not that comfy with him going to Ochi by himself - but I doubt he would be able to get up the hill to his mom's house -

Can his brother help him get settled in somewhere?

I gotta ask, Sus, where are his FRIENDS in all this?

[JAPrincess 27]

Alright, it's time to get my baby ready for Kindergarten

How did he grow up so fast? And when does he turn into the devil?

My Son