Yardies at Home and a Farrin (part17)

[IrieCat 2]

Ok VJers.. I have a question that has been lurking on my mind (hope it hasn't been asked and if it has, please lead me to the page):

How hard would you think it would be or has it been for your SO to get accustomed to living in a town/city that is predominantly white? I ask this because I was talking w/ my hubby about living in such an area and he states that he doesn't know if he could. Now he did say that since he loved me, he would live there, but he strongly thinks he'd try to convince me to move. It is a culture shock for them to move to another country in itself, but to also move to where there are very very few minorities. Have any of you experienced such a thing??

*sidenote:

I am in no way, shape or form racist and I do not ask this to hurt feelings or cause drama. Just a curious mind is all I have,

I can count the black people on 1 hand in our town. Louis and the 2 african girls that go to school with my daughter (they are foster kids so even their mom is white!) My daughter is mixed and I think I saw family move in up the street! Tierra likes to point out all the black people to Louis so he doesnt feel so alone. :-) Really, the only issue he has is people staring at him. And really for the most part they just like looking at him! I don't think (for the most part) that people are looking at him in a bad way. He gets compliments on his hair from older white ladies all the time. A woman at the grocery store (I swear my mom's age) even said hello to him, asked if he was Rasta, and told him "I smoked the Wisdom Weed myself!"...hahaha

We live close to the "city" and do hang out there often. It is MUCH more diverse in Portland. Africans, Hispanic, Asians... all kinds and colors!

At 1st I think Louis was pretty uncomfortabele, but now, having been here more than a year, he realizes its not so bad. He knows no one is out to get him and that people here in general are friendly and kind. As long as your SO has an open mind to people being kind, and not thinking from jump everyone will hate him... he will get accustomed quicker.

All that being said, I dont think he would say no to moving somewhere like DC! He loved it there.

[finesse 3]

ells - i'm with you....i'd be annoyed

[Ellsinlove 2]

ellsy bellsy..

u know usually im on ur side w/ hubby, but as a chronic absentminded person.. i have to take up for him this time.. i lose my keys in the house, cant remember what i did w/ my debit card or drivers license everyother day.. i am a mess..

so im gonna tell u like i tell sus w/ dj.. BE EASY ON HIM!! LOL

I'm gonna try Quana, I'm gonna try! It's hard being an #######-retentive overly-responsible person & not expecting others to be as diligent about hanging on to things....especially when it's your info that people could possibly use in these desperate times.

Yesterday we had my friend's 'pre-wedding reception' at a park in Berkeley & again he wasn't too impressed with all the drumming....it wasn't until they started telling people to take leftovers home & he scored a bottle of champagne & some brownie bites did that party become a success to him!

LOL @ the brownie bites luvs it

Is Lehi being shy around your friends?

. i just noticed its le-ah and le-hi LOL.. how cute..

OMG I just noticed too me too, that is the cutest le-ah and le-hi

He has a serious sweet tooth....together we are dangerous!

He is being shy around my friends but I hope with enough exposure, he'll warm up to everyone & be his usual outgoing self or put on his 'tour guide persona'.

When I introduce him to people, they want to pronounce it just like they do my name so I always have to stress that I'm 'lee-uh' & he's 'lee-hi'. I know that has to be confusing for people.

I think it is just that it seems we go from single, independant and doing things on our own (the way WE like it!) and then all of a sudden we need to compromise and deal with someone elses way of doing things. I really try to tell myself to let things go... I am very particular and like things done my way and need to learn that Louis does things his way.. and that his way is not always the wrong way.

Maybe you are overreacting a little, but I understand where you are coming from. Just venting it can feel better though.

Louis loses lots of things (and blames it on my cleaning!) :-)

True Cat! Life seemed so much more organized for me before he came along. Now it's a mess & I'm having a hard time adjusting to it. I'm trying to be easy but it's a bi%#@ being so particular.

Aww Ells... patience is all I can say! Things are soooo different here than in Jamaica especially our version of good, bad, urgency, or emergency.

Did I just make any sense, cuz in my head I did, lol.

Patience...

Yes, you made sense....& it's true. When you aren't used to all of these 'things' we have & use here, it doesn't seem like as big of a deal as it does to us who've had this way of life all along.

(((Ells)))

Like Quana said..be easy. Instead of going off. Just explain..that here in the US people can use that information to do illegal activities.

Like NeNe says...communication is key to long marriage. kikikik...Nene from Real Housewives of Atlanta

Part of my frustration is that I DO explain these things to him. He just doesn't listen to me. The only time he seems to believe what I say & start to take heed is when ANOTHER person tells him the same thing. Until then, it's like what I say goes in one ear & out the other.

Ells try not to be too upset with him hun...

I always try to look at things in this perspective since my Mom died....

If something HORRIBLE happened tomorrow, would a wet-up index card really matter

Now, thats not to say you shouldn't stress to him the importance of holding on to these things, but in the big picture it is just not worth a rift in your relationship. Yuh feel me?

Yeah, thanks for the reminder!

Ok VJers.. I have a question that has been lurking on my mind (hope it hasn't been asked and if it has, please lead me to the page):

How hard would you think it would be or has it been for your SO to get accustomed to living in a town/city that is predominantly white? I ask this because I was talking w/ my hubby about living in such an area and he states that he doesn't know if he could. Now he did say that since he loved me, he would live there, but he strongly thinks he'd try to convince me to move. It is a culture shock for them to move to another country in itself, but to also move to where there are very very few minorities. Have any of you experienced such a thing??

*sidenote:

I am in no way, shape or form racist and I do not ask this to hurt feelings or cause drama. Just a curious mind is all I have,

I just had a similar issue I posted about yesterday. It is hard for hubby to be around all of my white friends & such since he had only previously been around white people in 'tour guide' mode. It's very different when you have to interact on a daily basis doing everyday things. Just like for me being white, it was & is a challenge doing everyday things in JA. Partly because I don't really know how things run & partly because I know people doing business will treat me like a tourist & charge accordingly. But overall, it's still tough hanging with people you aren't used to.

[JaEnglishGirl 34]

CONGRATS Quanaaaaaaaaaaaa!!

Is it because you couldn't go any longer without jumping his bones lol???

[MRStee 19]

ells - i'm with you....i'd be annoyed

Finese you just make me laugh, you c r a z y lol

[Ellsinlove 2]

He knows no one is out to get him and that people here in general are friendly and kind. As long as your SO has an open mind to people being kind, and not thinking from jump everyone will hate him... he will get accustomed quicker.

All that being said, I dont think he would say no to moving somewhere like DC! He loved it there.

Very good point! It's all in perception & how a person reacts.

ells - i'm with you....i'd be annoyed

Thanks Finesse! I'm still annoyed but trying to take my yardie sistrens' advice & chill out.

[dancehallquana 5]

Ok VJers.. I have a question that has been lurking on my mind (hope it hasn't been asked and if it has, please lead me to the page):

How hard would you think it would be or has it been for your SO to get accustomed to living in a town/city that is predominantly white? I ask this because I was talking w/ my hubby about living in such an area and he states that he doesn't know if he could. Now he did say that since he loved me, he would live there, but he strongly thinks he'd try to convince me to move. It is a culture shock for them to move to another country in itself, but to also move to where there are very very few minorities. Have any of you experienced such a thing??

*sidenote:

I am in no way, shape or form racist and I do not ask this to hurt feelings or cause drama. Just a curious mind is all I have,

well.. personally.. i would not seek to live in that neighborhood either, i don't like too much of any one kind of ppl all around me.. LOL.. so i wouldn't even suggest roger do it.. altho, it probably wouldn't matter anyway, i am very anitsocial, never really fellowshipped w/ my neighbors

[dancehallquana 5]

CONGRATS Quanaaaaaaaaaaaa!!

Is it because you couldn't go any longer without jumping his bones lol???

i knew u was gonna say that JAE!!!!!!!!!! but ummm that first time WAS BEAUTIFUL after the drought LOL

Ok VJers.. I have a question that has been lurking on my mind (hope it hasn't been asked and if it has, please lead me to the page):

How hard would you think it would be or has it been for your SO to get accustomed to living in a town/city that is predominantly white? I ask this because I was talking w/ my hubby about living in such an area and he states that he doesn't know if he could. Now he did say that since he loved me, he would live there, but he strongly thinks he'd try to convince me to move. It is a culture shock for them to move to another country in itself, but to also move to where there are very very few minorities. Have any of you experienced such a thing??

*sidenote:

I am in no way, shape or form racist and I do not ask this to hurt feelings or cause drama. Just a curious mind is all I have,

I cannot answer b/c I live in a multicultural neighborbood. Hardly any whites here.

but would u move to one where there was???

[JaEnglishGirl 34]

CONGRATS Quanaaaaaaaaaaaa!!

Is it because you couldn't go any longer without jumping his bones lol???

i knew u was gonna say that JAE!!!!!!!!!! but ummm that first time WAS BEAUTIFUL after the drought LOL

wasn't it AMAZING the first time as HUSBAND and WIFE?????

as a seasoned and practiced fornicator, even I found the experience wonderful

[dancehallquana 5]

[

I can count the black people on 1 hand in our town. Louis and the 2 african girls that go to school with my daughter (they are foster kids so even their mom is white!) My daughter is mixed and I think I saw family move in up the street! Tierra likes to point out all the black people to Louis so he doesnt feel so alone. :-) Really, the only issue he has is people staring at him. And really for the most part they just like looking at him! I don't think (for the most part) that people are looking at him in a bad way. He gets compliments on his hair from older white ladies all the time. A woman at the grocery store (I swear my mom's age) even said hello to him, asked if he was Rasta, and told him "I smoked the Wisdom Weed myself!"...hahaha

We live close to the "city" and do hang out there often. It is MUCH more diverse in Portland. Africans, Hispanic, Asians... all kinds and colors!

At 1st I think Louis was pretty uncomfortabele, but now, having been here more than a year, he realizes its not so bad. He knows no one is out to get him and that people here in general are friendly and kind. As long as your SO has an open mind to people being kind, and not thinking from jump everyone will hate him... he will get accustomed quicker.

All that being said, I dont think he would say no to moving somewhere like DC! He loved it there.

wow irie..i could not imagine life for louis.. but he is getting along, so all is well!!

[1luv 1]

CONGRATS Quanaaaaaaaaaaaa!!

Is it because you couldn't go any longer without jumping his bones lol???

i knew u was gonna say that JAE!!!!!!!!!! but ummm that first time WAS BEAUTIFUL after the drought LOL

Ok VJers.. I have a question that has been lurking on my mind (hope it hasn't been asked and if it has, please lead me to the page):

How hard would you think it would be or has it been for your SO to get accustomed to living in a town/city that is predominantly white? I ask this because I was talking w/ my hubby about living in such an area and he states that he doesn't know if he could. Now he did say that since he loved me, he would live there, but he strongly thinks he'd try to convince me to move. It is a culture shock for them to move to another country in itself, but to also move to where there are very very few minorities. Have any of you experienced such a thing??

*sidenote:

I am in no way, shape or form racist and I do not ask this to hurt feelings or cause drama. Just a curious mind is all I have,

I cannot answer b/c I live in a multicultural neighborbood. Hardly any whites here.

but would u move to one where there was???

No! I like the diversity of cultures.

[dillon 6]

CONGRATS Quanaaaaaaaaaaaa!!

Is it because you couldn't go any longer without jumping his bones lol???

i knew u was gonna say that JAE!!!!!!!!!! but ummm that first time WAS BEAUTIFUL after the drought LOL

wasn't it AMAZING the first time as HUSBAND and WIFE?????

as a seasoned and practiced fornicator, even I found the experience wonderful

JaEnglish you really made me laugh on this one. But it is so true!

[1luv 1]

CONGRATS Quanaaaaaaaaaaaa!!

Is it because you couldn't go any longer without jumping his bones lol???

i knew u was gonna say that JAE!!!!!!!!!! but ummm that first time WAS BEAUTIFUL after the drought LOL

wasn't it AMAZING the first time as HUSBAND and WIFE?????

as a seasoned and practiced fornicator, even I found the experience wonderful

[Islandwoman 0]

Good morning all..

i pray everyone is blessed and doing well..

i have some big news..didn't share yesterday cuz im too nosy and couldn't get caught up..

OKAY MY SISTREN..

Ya'll know i have been a worry wart when it comes to this JA/US love thing for 2 years now.. but THIS trip has been different than ALL others.. i am busting out ot the seams w/ happiness and joy everyday w/ this man.. the love he's shown me cannot be matched SOOOOO

we eloped over the weekend!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i am officially a MRS.. and I LOOOOVVVVE MY GOOD GOOD HUSBAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YEAH BABY!!!!!! I was wondering when I say the "hookup" over the weekend and the smile on your face!!! CONGRATS CHICA!!!

Congratulations dance......

Yes, my husband will be here tomorrow, at 4:30 pm.

Congrats Roxie....glad to hear it is finally over and beginning for you and Joel.

[dancehallquana 5]

ells - i'm with you....i'd be annoyed

its definately annoying i agree, i annoy my dyam self! .. she should talk w/ him FOR SHO cuz he should know the importance of sensitive information and trying to be more responsible.. just know u might have to deal w/ it cuz the damage may be irreversible like in my case .. u will upset urself if u try to change things that aren't gonna change..