Question about choices

[Joel Halfwassen 0]

I have a curiosity. I would like to hear from people why they chose to go the visa route that they are/did? Be it K-1, K-3, CR-1, whatever. Second, why are you (or did you) get legally married in the country that you did? Third, why did you decide to go DCF or not?

I will start with myself...

Katya and I decided to go with a legal marriage in Odessa, Ukraine because it was important for us to include all of her family and friends in the event. Had we been legally married in the US this would not have been possible. Besides the visa requirement for Ukrainians to come to the US the cost for the average Ukrainian to fly to the US is prohibitive due to wage differences between the two countries. For our choice the ease of the visa process was secondary to us needing her family involved.

Secondly, we are going the CR-1 route because it SEEMS to be easier for her once she gets here. She wants to get a job straight away and start living a 'normal' American life with no restrictions. Although it might be a longer wait time in terms of getting her to the US then the K-3 visa. This might have been a different choice for us if we were not doing this in the summer and I did not have the job that I do. I work for a University and I have most of the summer off so I get to spend much of it with her in Ukraine.

Third, because I am spending so much time in the Ukraine I have been able to do DCF with her. This has been SO easy with the US Embassy in Ukraine. They are nothing but wonderful! Every email question has been answered promptly and thoroughly. When we dropped off the I-130 and the I-864 they we great at getting it done quickly and with a smile.

Joel

Edited July 9, 2006 by Joel Halfwassen

[moondancer627 0]

We choose the K-1 route knowing at the time it was easier (LOL) than any other route, and of course as we were going through it, it seemed a tough route to take, especially when Anton was denied entry in Jan 05 at the border. In the long run it all turned out, Anton now has his green card and most of it wasn't too bad in hindsight after reading many other's accounts.

Canada is not to far away like your fiance's country, so it's much easier to visit and cheaper too.

Good luck and success..

Moondancer

[rebeccajo 14]

Well, I agree with you that the CR-1 is MUCH better so far as when you are done, you are done! No waiting on a social security number, no waiting to work, etc.

We chose the K-1 because it was faster. We were one of the blessed with Vermont as our processing center PLUS London as our embassy. I estimated a six month processing time at the outside - we ended up with a total of 106 days.

As far as where we married, it made more sense to marry in the US. Most of Wes' family are deceased - he has only one brother left. While I would have loved to marry in Ireland, you can no longer enter the UK and marry on a visit - they won't issue a marriage license to 'foreigners' - you MUST have a fiance visa. So that option was out.

Other things factored into the decision as well. With my fiance in Northern Ireland, travel was cheaper for us than for you, but it still wasn't cheap. Plus missing a lot of work for visits wasn't really an option either. As it was, Wes took a 9 week unpaid sabbatical to come visit me last summer, and it put him WAY behind on his bills! But I guess he thought it was worth it to give our relationship a longer, more continuous 'test run'. PLUS it gave him a chance to spend more time in the US and see where (if any) he was going to have adjustment difficulties. Granted, at that point we had already filed the K-1, but ya know, it is just an engagement, and engagements get broken every day.

We could not do DCF in the UK. We thought about the K-3, but we didn't want to be married and not living together - although to be honest I toyed with the idea of getting married and keeping it a secret so I could draw my alimony longer! You can make whatever you like of that - if you knew my ex-husband and the size of my divorce settlement you wouldn't blame me one bit for having considered it!!!!!

I'll throw this out to those of you doing the K-1. It IS better to be together and it IS easier to get through tough times when you are together. BUT - the time period where your loved one can't work can bring stressors, especially if they are the type to get bored or if you need money. The lack of an 'identity' is tough also. No social security number and no greencard make them almost 'non-persons' in the eyes of the rest of the world. That greencard is the thing that John Q. Public and John Q. Businessman regard as proof of legal immigration. EAD's have to be explained sometimes.

My opinionated summation - K-1's are faster but there is stress during the AOS phase. CR-1 takes longer and you are apart longer, but a more normal financial life for your family and a smoother emotional transition for your immigrant spouse are great benefits once you are reunited.

Edited July 9, 2006 by rebeccajo

[sarah and hicham 3]

We chose a K-1 because honestly there is no point in us waiting longer so my fiance can work right away because he doesn't speak English. So we decided to get him here quick then he can start learning English and by the time he can work, then he should (hopefully) be able to speak well enough. We didn't really want to get married in Morocco either.

Sarah

[Karen_L 1]

We chose the K-1 after completing 90% of the preparations that would have permitted us to marry in Italy in January, meaning we would have had to use the K-3. Honestly, at first, he and I were going to elope because I didn't think my parents would approve of us getting married so young. My fiance' tried to convince me many times to tell them, but I thought they'd be furious, try and keep me from going to visit him, and then we'd never be able to get married. They've always been pretty open to my fiance' and they never irrationally hated him for being foreign or anything, but I REALLY thought they would've pitched a fit over us wanting to marry when we wanted to.

Eventually, though, I started feeling EXTREMELY guilty for not saying anything and I decided to just tell my mother: We're in love. We want to get married. We know we're a little on the young side (I was 21 at the time, he was 22), but we've been together for a while now and we need to have a real life together now. To my surprise, she agreed! I felt about a ton of guilt and stress lift away. The only thing was that she wanted us to get married in the US. I looked more closely at the K-1 and decided it might be a better option anyway. So that's how it came to be!

[kittykatwoman 0]

We chose IR1 for many reasons.

First we married in my country in France. We decided we would stay a while because it was important to me that my husband got to know my culture and i was not ready to leave anyway.

We also decided it would make it easier to wait for our second anniversary so the paperwork and the chances to get it quick would be higher.

And there were no way we would seperate, i'd rather work my ### off and live in a studio with my husband than being apart so we decided he would stay no matter what.

[meauxna 15]

Cool topic

I'm curious that a couple of you who *have* filed via the Consulate (DCF) identify yourselves here as CR/IR. DCF totally rules!

We were outside the US when we met. We first looked at ways to "live" part time in the US and part tiime abroad. Turns out there is no such visa other than visits on the VWP.

We looked at visiting and adjusting status (at the time, spelled out clearly as an available option) but the travel restrictions during AOS (waiting on AP) were not acceptable for our situation.

We weren't yet married, so the fiance visa sounded like the right fit, but I read it, as many do, that I/USC couldn't do that and be outside the US (false). And then we'd still have the AOS travel problem.

The K-3 was brand new then, and now we looked like we were getting somewhere, but where? It didn't make sense. THEN I fianlly found Alvena's old site and the comparison chart (moved to visajourney a few years back): http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...mp;page=compare and foundout about Direct Consular Filing.

When I read about DCF, it all clicked. That is, IF I was 'really' resident in Greece (which as it turned out, I didn't need to be, but by then I had my Greek Green Card and was living there full time). We didn't want a "wedding" and my parents were living in Europe at the time (both of us with v small families) so we opted for a Greek courthouse wedding (quite hysterical) and married because we wanted to be married--nothing to do with deadlines or immigrating etc. That was nice!

Arriving on an Immigrant Visa made *a ton* of difference! The DAH is very adustable anyway, and embraced living in yet another foreign country as 'a local'. All his documents arrived in short order, got his driver's license etc etc. Now, he's already retired & didn't have to go job hunt, but he was able to pursue a lot of things with confidence and not be in 'limbo' status. Most importantly, he was immediately travel authorized and was able to go to his Mum when he needed to. As it all turned out, that piece was key for us, as Dot passed away the night we were making our final move to the US. Happily, we had had our best visits with her in that interim year, and the DAH was able to travel to see her for her birthday and a couple of nonsense trips that we are now SO glad he made.

Bear in mind that we are on the 'mature' side of life. I always say that EVERY family is unique and their needs dictate what type of visa is best for them. I'll just agree that 'faster' aint always 'better' (but sometime it is) and that the greatest DISservice done to K-1 fiances is not being able to work for (realistically) their first 4-7 months in the US. That seems totally counterproductive to me, and is the cause of *great* stresses on couples. Even when you plan for it, that can be a long time during which cabin fever and other ailments develop. Moving countries/cultures is hard enough, and work is such an important social system in the US, that I really think it stinks to cut people off from that.

Finally, Joel, that picture of you two is too damn beautiful!

[Joel Halfwassen 0]

Thank you for the comments about the picture. It is one of my favorites from our wedding day. I am going to put some more into my phot o area of my profile. I still get all weak-kneed when I think about how wonderful the whole day was.

As for DCF...The reason I put down CR-1 was because that is the visa we end up getting.

And thank to everyone who has shared so far. These are some really great stories.

Joel